Hello! I’m Modmare, and I’ll be running this ask blog.
This blog will be set in a time-travel AU where Nightmare is trapped in (non-canon) Dreamtale before the apple incident. His brother is currently a Baby, but Nightmare is still corrupted.
Purely because it would be boring to kill a baby (and not because of any remaining bond to Dream,) Nightmare has saddled himself with the grand role of Fathermare.
This is @syxadel’s time travel dadmare AU. (I am he.)
Loosely inspired by @calcium-cat’s au/fic, One Small Dream.
CONTENT WARNINGS
Themes such as violence, blood, smoking, drugs, alcohol, murder, and torture will appear. Other unlisted dark or potentially adult themes may also appear, so please continue at your own discretion.
For the sake of clarity, no suggestive material will appear on this blog. Nothing sex-related will happen to any of the characters.
Additionally, Baby Dream does not die, and the most he will be injured is a scrape on his knee. No animals will be depicted dying either.
INBOX NOTES
If you’d like to send an ask to me or commentate, please type (OOC) or (Modmare).
By default, all asks will be directed to Dadmare.
Asks will prompt or influence Dadmare’s thoughts or actions.
Unfortunately, he can’t actually hear you like Ink or Error.
Do not thirst in the inbox, there is a child here.
NM subconsciously refuses to be healed and must accept the healing. But ultimately he believes at his core that he is a ‘bad kid’ and deserves to hurt
Part of why dream wants to grow up is because Healer says he’s too young to help others (but dream means he wants to help nm)
if nm actually did try healing given the time and teaching, he could actually help others. But Nightmare has never given himself or anyone else the chance to teach him or to try
As kids, Dream has tried to heal NM and was incapable. NM would not accept healing.
“He needs you to be there.” Nightmare said, gazing into Dream at first and then past him at the floor. “No one else in the village cares about him like you do.”
Dream shook his head slowly, mouth a tremulous line.
“Why do you think you have to go to the Healer so badly?” Nightmare gently brushed the tear off of Dream’s cheek.
The child shifted, now guilty and reluctant to answer, sniffling softly and rubbing his eyes. Nightmare waited patiently as Dream took in a deep breath.
“I just…” Dream mumbled. “I thought I had to.”
“Why?”
“I dunno.” He helplessly said, aimless frustration welling inside of him. It was clear he didn’t understand very well himself, which should have been expected of a child. Dream wasn’t the same person he remembered.
He still doesn’t trust me. Nightmare still thought. Does he think I’ll poison his brother?
“What if you don’t come back?” Dream helplessly blurted.
its good to acknoweldge the hollowness of revenge but sometimes you really do just need a story about someone who gets hurt and then kills and kills and kills and kills their enemies. its cathartic, babey.
"there's nothing that can bring my loved one back, so there's no point in killing you" and "there's nothing that can bring my loved one back, so there's nothing that can save you" are two themes that can and should co-exist
I really adore Komorebi and it's been The Star of everything you've ever written and I've read. I really hope you can finish it with what you have in mind, even if it takes five years or ten. Writing a book takes a long time, and I know I have my fair share of fics I still haven't posted that's taken over years to write. Write at your own pace, post at your own pace. It's really beautiful, I hope any negative attention it might recieve is glanced at and promptly ignored, and I hope that, going forward, you're happy to keep writing it, and keep it up. It's one of the best, if only, DadMare AU that I've read. It's really special to me.
this means a lot to me to hear, thank you so much for sending this message. to be honest (sheepish) i've spent a little too much time dwelling on the negative feelings those readers gave me, so... thanks a lot for reminding me i could just ignore it. i'm pretty sure this will take me so, so long, so even if only one person is going to keep on reading, i'll still keep on writing. i'm happy to make something special to me that can be just as special for you.
hey guys, it's been a while! here's a mostly developed timeline for komorebi, minus some of the worldbuilding bits i still need to figure out. this is for everyone who said they'd like to know the full outline since this project will take more than two years to be written.
[BIG SPOILERS FOR KOMOREBI AHEAD]
ARC 1 - SPRING :3c
Baby Dream ( Sunbeam) finds this fucking gaylord at the Tree and drags him indoors somehow. Don’t worry about it, we don't know either (he doesn’t know either.)
Nightmare gets tucked in, notably, Sunbeam has zero effects to Nightmare’s corruption
Where the hell is Young Nightmare (Night/Moonbeam)
Scenes of building trust and developing routine with Sunbeam
They try finding Night. Fail
Okay breakdown time we’re never gonna fucking find him!!! -sunbeam
Jk! Found him. Night is beaten an inch of his life and looks horrible. He blindly crawled out of a cave and to the stream that runs close to their cottage.
Moonbeam is very frail and sickly and has to be washed and cleaned. He is unconscious for a few tense days. Sunbeam never leaves his side.
Night wakes up. He isn’t happy that there is an unknown adult here with weird dangerous vibes.
Of course, Night and Mare have a tense conversation about if Mare is here to take Dream away, or if he’s going to hurt Night, or more. Night makes it abundantly clear that he doesn’t trust Mare to care for Dream, and that he doesn’t believe that Mare would care for him either. Night has no faith in any of the adults in his life, and he’s so stressed the whole time that Dream kicks him out so that his brother can sleep peacefully.
Of course, that doesn’t happen either. Night can’t sleep with a stranger in their home, even if he’s exhausted and falling in and out of consciousness.
Mare is forced to be honest with Night about the fact that he genuinely has nowhere to go, he’s got no one else to rely on, and the village already hates him. Night is like “oh he’s just like me fr”
Dream talks to Night about Mare and that he’s not an evil bastard. This does make him feel a little less scared, because Night trusts Dream
Night & Mare trust earned scene (Mare protects Night from an attack and is the only goddamn adult in his life who cares about him, even if Night tries to prove that he’s the awful child that everyone says he is. Also, continual building trust by making peace offerings through the form of stories to keep him from getting bored in bed)
Night and Dream have cute fluffy moments at some point because i need them to be happy for my health or i’m gonna perish
Building more trust with the kids through routine and little things, like caring for them by fixing their clothes or going out of his way to provide something comforting. Constant source of shelter and security, as well as advice and comforting bedtime stories at night.
Wrap up the season with observation on the leaves changing and the chill growing stronger.
Throughout this, we’re going to cut away to Mare snooping on the village and slowly gathering blackmail material to sow dissent and turn everyone against each other, or use to his advantage to gain bargaining material.
Mare intensely investigates Night’s reason for disappearing and finds the party responsible.
Unfortunately, holding all the secrets doesn’t exactly ensure he can consistently provide for the twins, so he still needs to find a real source of income or nourishment…
Side plot of farming/carpentry/sewing arc, where we refer back to a skill that Night is shown to have early on that’s never really nurtured by anyone.
Mare is able to anonymously/through another party sell his work, which is artisanal and skilled enough that competitors can’t recreate it.
Additionally, he begins to write down some of the stories that he remembers and leaves them for Night to read when he’s not around. (Figure out how to get the paper in the first place. Probably stealing. Don’t think about when the printing press was invented, or the average literacy rates of the common medieval folk, or even what language they read in…)
Introduce the Village Face, representative and leader of the community council (based on middle ages Venetian class hierarchy system)
Introduce the empty Lord’s estate, which suspiciously resembles something that Nightmare would’ve inhabited or made himself after his corruption… What happened to the Lord that was supposed to tend to these lands?
Last chapter has someone mysteriously disappearing and being found dead in the forest
ARC 2 - SUMMER
The town investigates this horrible murder… and the clues are strange
and also a hint to the constant presence of religion within the rural countryside when someone starts praying
First spiritual wanderer passes through the town on a pilgrimage, which tells the readers about a religion that exists in the world (it’s catholic-adjacent but it’s based on the Angel the same way that Deltarune handles it)
Wanderer prays for the dead and clashes with local spiritualism about the Tree
Murder is concluded as a wild animal attack with no relation to Mare, who can shapeshift into a giant fuckoff wolf.
Mare is forced to watch Night live the trauma that he was suppressing in the first arc.
Mare hates to watch Night take all of the suffering, so he teaches him to how to run, how to hide, and how to disarm someone with a few words (because the two of them always have been physically weak, and Night doesn’t have tendrils)
Mare starts to really burn with hatred for the village and his Schemes unfold as the village folk begin to turn on each other and their energy gives his strength.
Mare regains body mass and two tendrils, his ribs heal, though his back is still fucked
Mare spends less and less time with Night and Dream, falling into his desire to pursue a revenge where the Village rips itself apart from the inside.
Night eventually notices Mare’s long-term manipulation and feels conflicted over whether to do something or not. As Dream’s brother, he feels the pressure to choose the right decisions, but… these people… do they really need his sympathy? Would they even accept it?
Night feels a strange, second-hand glee knowing that the villagers are fighting, but it’s tempered by exhaustion and a desire for peace. He wishes more than anything that the people would just be fixed and treat him like a normal person.
Mare starts to gain more attention as he gains bargaining power by having certain merchant families on his side through providing a special service no other can: brokering information. Spying from the shadows. Trade secrets can be bought for an exorbitant price.
Mare doesn’t intend on becoming so immersed in the village politics that he is a real active member of their community, because he literally hates them (I also dgaf like that) so he only sometimes takes deals-if they pay the right price.
His prices are not always monetary. An equal trade is an equal trade, especially because he doesn’t have large plots of farmland.
Other times… Mare’d just really like some clothes or something of your trade for his kids, if he likes you enough.
Of course, his dedication to providing for the twins earns him respect in certain circles, who now turn to him and provide their communal support if only through a mutual concern for the wellbeing of the Tree Guardians.
Night’s desire for peace and to be treated normally are momentarily achieved through Mare’s status as an established part of the Guild, but his hopes are dashed when it’s revealed to be a ruse. No one will ever treat him like a normal person.
Mare still has fans who are looking out for him, although some are shallowly invested in his mystery and claim to be a Lord.
Some exploration of how the Village primarily treats the Tree as a spiritual guardian and force of nature.
Some exploration of the deification / sainthood of Dream, and the ostracization of Nightmare. Why exactly did they do this to him? It’s not exclusively the product of his negative aura-otherwise they would feel guilty when he’s gone. There had to be a time when Nightmare wasn’t hated… right? Could it be that someone was driving the narrative?
Some more exploration of the Angel spreading its wings (religious influence) across the rural countryside, the changing definition of purity, and the absorption of the spiritual worship of the Tree to create a religious mindset that adopts both the viewpoints of the Angel and the Village.
Exploration on how these views shape the stories that populate the minds of the Village, and how they compound to craft characters who are evil and good-ones that represent Dream and Nightmare.
Meanwhile, Mare’s little bedtime stories are retold throughout the village amongst the children as Night tentatively shares what tales he’s been given. This creates a connection amongst the children where they have a perspective of their own to define Night-the child who has a gentle voice, who reads to them because they can’t, and who helps them paint new worlds that exist beyond their own.
Dream asks why Mare cares about them.
Mare can’t answer directly because he’s too emotionally constipated, which frustrates Dream.
Night talks to Dream and reassures him that although Mare can’t explain why he loves them, all they need to know is that they’re cared for. Night is secure with the knowledge that Mare would risk his life for them, and that’s all he wants-someone who will value them both and treat them like regular children.
Night eventually tells Mare that he and his brother rely on him for their security, and that they trust him because he’s the only adult who’s willing to take responsibility for them. He tells Mare that he’s afraid of him leaving them alone, because if they’re abandoned once more, Night will be beaten again and Dream will be taken advantage of.
Mare realizes he can not abandon them, because the thought of consciously leaving himself to experience the same traumatic past that he did already is a choice he would never live down.
Mare debates over whether he should train Night into a mini version of himself before realizing that he no longer wants a tool. He wants to see his son be the child he was supposed to be.
Mare realizes that he’s setting an example, whether he likes it or not, for the two kids under his care.
Mare struggles, but decides that he has enough support from his trade and his addition to the trade guild to stop brokering info to the main families who use his powers for underhanded advantages.
This obviously won’t go quietly.
Oh yeah. Error is there too. He’s been watching the whole time while eating popcorn.
ARC 3 - FALL
Error opens the arc by informing Mare that he could just pull him now, but doing so would have dramatic effects on the timeline and could destabilize both him and the entire au. It would glitch the whole thing and leave permanent damage on Mare’s body that would never heal- as well as setting it on track to create two more outcodes who would eventually try to find him.
Once Winter ends, though, which is when the Apple Incident originally occurred… Mare has a safe opportunity to leave. Error doesn’t elaborate on whether or not the kids can come, because he just fucks off before then bc he’s Error
Focus more on fluffy dadmare shenanigans and on whether or not nm should be dadmare
“I’m too traumatized for kids” nightmare REALLY gets into introspection and self-awareness about handling his trauma and how he deals with it
Mare’s previous clients, who bought secrets from him (or were sold out by him) start to seek him out.
Night’s being slowly isolated again from the little budding group of kids who have started to see him as less of a monster and more as another kid. It’s heartwrenching for him.
Night doesn’t tell Mare about it, because he doesn’t want to burden his father with more of how he’s getting bullied. Night thinks he should be standing up for himself, but he doesn’t know how to stop being silently excluded from things he used to be part of.
Night stops going outside and stays in bed.
Dream is aware of what’s happening and starts to ask too many questions, starts to try too hard to bring everyone back together. He is taken hostage. (“under rightful custody/protection”)
Mare is very upset. Night is very upset.
Bad things happen to bad people.
Mare completely takes care of the root of the problem.
cute family fluff moments compilation because i need it
learning moments for the kids about basic things, like saying sorry, or how to write a letter, or how to chop vegetables for stew
Dream’s cool leaf collection + Night’s weird bug wing and rock collection, which are both given their own boxes to put under their beds
The house is getting too small and too cold for the coming season. Mare has to learn carpentry / hire someone to come help, which he’s going to hate
Preparing for the winter season paralleling preparing for the eventual decision of whether Mare can return to his old life anymore with how much he’s changed, and how he’s going to take his kids with him
ARC 4 / FINALE - WINTER
This is mostly family fluff where they're cute and bundled up in scarves, because i think it's adorable
peak family dynamic and trust reached, idyllic lives
ignore how some of the village stares at them in fear
mare outright addressing the apple incident and warning them of what will happen if the kids eat the apples
dream and night swear not to eat the apples unless it's absolutely necessary to save their lives
surely nothing bad will happen to them, right?
Right?
Dream and Nightmare go outside to enjoy the sun and sit by the stream/the Tree
Nightmare’s ongoing longing for his team comes to completion when he realizes he has to return, because his team was his weird ass family in their own way
Something Bad Happens and the Tree is Involved
Error Ex Machina
Nightmare brings his kids with him to escape the AU
The elder guardian would deny the feeling in his chest, the ache that swelled and almost felt… eager.
“You will hear it now,” he promised, and he hadn’t meant to-he was getting too close to this strange, warped, younger version of himself. Promises were for those who intended on staying and seeing through the ending of a story.
Men like him-ones whose terrible deeds outlived them-were the ones who brought about those tragic ends and closed the narrative with a horrified gasp. He was unsuitable for this sickly, pale reflection of himself, one so fragile that it seemed impossible for them to be the same.
Yet... Mare oddly became dependent on the small, distant emotions the little boy would feel. He had spent weeks watching Night's dull, vacant eyes track the swaying Tree from their bedroom window. In this tiny room without luxury, art or decoration, the sick child's world was reduced to the meager wooden walls containing their twin beds and the chair where Mare would sometimes sleep. Sometimes a flicker of life might glance over the shallow pools in Night's dark, bruised eye sockets, but it always extinguished shortly after-as if afraid of being found.
Mare, along the course of some dozen sunsets, longed for the smile of that fragile boy. Mare did not believe in his care for his younger self. Entertaining such an idea was only a shallow delusion that stemmed from an instinctual sense of self-preservation. But he did believe in Dream’s affection for his brother.
Mare believed in that strange, stubborn little dandelion boy, whose will denied death and seemed to defy the very rules of reality itself by finding his brother. He had no idea that his brother was meant to die here. Mare was supposed to replace him in this timeline, as the two of them shouldn’t exist at the same time. Dream loved them both, ignorant to the ways of the greater world, uncaring.
Through his unending affection, Mare could understand the dependency on Night’s smile. The fact that it ruled whether the beaming child’s day was good or great. For the same food every day could nourish them, but when the quiet, shy child in his room would find that small gleam of life again-
-Mare only wanted to be the cause of his happiness.
“Your brother hasn’t heard this one yet,” Mare nonchalantly said, leaning back in their bedroom chair. It hadn’t gotten any taller or more comfortable, but he was growing used to the discomfort of unyielding wood. “Later you might regale him with what you have learned from me.”
He noticed the smallest, eager spark fizzle in the vastness of Night’s emotional sphere. He recalled enjoying what little he could claim for himself before his younger brother would inevitably beg to share with him. Then, it gave way to a trickle of curiosity and… dread.
“… where will you go?” The fragile boy said, still motionless in his child-sized bed, his head propped up on that beaten up pillow.
Mare inclined his head. “Not far. I’ll be in the village.” I need to gain info.
“… okay.” He said, like there was nothing he could do about it. Not a single whisper of protest or stubborn denial.
And like that, Mare craved his emotions. He craved the outburst of colorful tantrums and big, fat tears, and the whine of why, don’t go and begging of take me along that Dream used to have. He hated comparing them both, but the difference between them was stark. Night was a hollow shell.
How were they ever the same person?
“Shall I stay with you even after Dream returns?” He evenly said.
Night didn’t look at him, even though his soul-traitorous thing, he was well aware-made a vivid attempt at lurching free. Mare knew he wanted, because they always wanted things with everything within them. The elder guardian waited for him to act on those feelings.
“Only if you want to.” Night pliantly said.
Mare held tight onto himself. Night was already far too sensitive and intuitive. If he felt guilty for saying the wrong answer or constantly sought the right response by sneaking in on other’s emotions, he wouldn’t appropriately convey his needs.
“Then I’ll stay.” Mare simply said.
Night didn’t smile. Not fully. But it was close-the softening of his tired, stern features, into something warm and tentatively sweet. Mare tasted his tiny, splintered hope. It was a terribly bittersweet and sharp flavor, numbing his mouth with the dread of anticipatory betrayal. The kind of anticipation that comes from a few too many disappointments and hours left waiting alone in the dark, for a new friend to meet him behind the library.
“Sorry.” Night said in advance, still so quiet. The whole of him was always so unthinkingly tense, constantly anticipating a strike. “You don’t have to.”
Mare resisted the urge to meet his eyes, to convey his sincerity.
“It’s fine,” he said instead. He tucked away his thoughts. “Let me begin the story.”
You know I recently started writing a fic of the Twins myself again (sort of) that's based on a dream I had once, and I've actually based that Nightmare a lot on your Dadmare! Komorebi has been a huge inspiration for me, especially with how determined you've been to work on it despite the huge stretches between updates!
(My AU doesn't involve any time travel shenanigans or babyfication, but it DOES make Nightmare a HELL of a lot more eldritch and unknowable. He views his Dream as something closer to a fetus at this point, lmao-)
Awww, holy moly, that's awesome! I'm glad to hear it, especially since... yeah. Komorebi is like a several-year long passion project. It's gonna happen, it'll just take its time.
Your Nightmare sounds sooo fun. I love eldritch and unknowable Nightmares, they're so spooky and fun to write. His Dream must like the equivalent of a very far away and tiny baby star
Here’s an unedited cut from Chapter 8 of Komorebi.
“Good morning,” the eldest eventually uttered, for lack of better words.
“G’morning,” Dream automatically replied, peeling off of his brother reluctantly, some sanity returning to his fraught expression.
“Would you like some tea?” Mare gestured over his shoulder, where he had definitely not just blown out the fire. “I must go to the village soon, and see if they have any healing food or medicine for your brother.”
Dream’s round face twisted with childish contempt, and unnaturally bitter for his typical demeanor, he said, “They won’t give it to you if you say it’s for Nighty. They hate him and they don’t care if he dies or disappears.”
Mare remained unflinching. “Then I’ll just ask for the medicine.”
“Are you gonna lie to them?” Dream asked. His mouth was still curled into a pouty frown, his short fingers clutching his brother’s purple tunic for the comfort of a beloved teddy bear. “Lying is bad.”
“I need medicine, though.” Mare gestured at himself, and Dream’s pinched expression brightened with realization. “I am still wounded, and it has not healed for a few days now.”
Dream looked strangely guilty for a moment, and Mare wondered, fleetingly, if he housed the spirit of his future self. Then, he dismissed his wild theory.
In which a brother is found, Nightmare has many thoughts, tea is had, and plans are made.
Nightmare tiredly scrubbed a gray, stained cloth up and down his laundry washboard, cream colored soap suds splashing about the cloudy, cold water in the large metal basin.
There was little fragrance to the water beyond the slightly sweet richness of goat milk. Nonetheless, Nightmare was sure that the soap was still effective. He had become used to the constant deluge of perfumes in his modern world, especially in laundry detergent. There was the frustrating first century of his transformation where he would try vainly to wear different materials, only for it all to be stained black and coated in his corruption.
Yet, the towel he was scrubbing was returning to its original, duckling yellow, the dark stain of his presence lifting to grey.
He wondered, absently, if his fingers may turn grey as well. His rippling reflection’s bright blue eye peered back from between dirty suds, tired, frowning. His stained hands hadn’t changed, no matter how much scrubbing he’s done. No kind of soap or purification has lifted the damage from his body.
This fic is going to take a long time to write… at least 2 years. I’m not super great at longfics and I’m in university & working right now, so it’ll be big breaks between chapters.
Would you guys like to read the outline for the whole narrative?
Hello fellas, it’s been a while since this poll. I’m wrapping up my finals week in university and will release the outline after I get situated again. There’s no actual date of release, but I have about the 1st, 2nd, and vague 3rd arcs written out. Or at least configured in my mind- the main thing is that I know how the plot goes, it needs events and shenanigans and subplots. I’ll update y’all again when I make progress.
