thegilbertsdaughter:
Elena filed that little tidbit away for later - if Stefan was keeping things from her, things that might help her understand her nature, then she wanted them drug into the light - even if it was kicking and screaming all the way. Her hand flexed around her glass, but this time it didn’t break. “I hate her,” Elena hissed. “I don’t hate anyone, not even the people I should, but god…I want nothing more than to lock her in a room and let the daylight in, and it scares the hell out of me, Damon. I don’t know how to handle an urge like that.” She could see the tension in his jaw, though, and let the subject drop - Katherine would be an eternal sore point where the Salvatore brothers were concerned. Downing the rest of her drink, Elena watched as he forced himself to relax. “I don’t know where he is tonight - and I’m sure he’d warn me that I should be running the other direction. But here’s the thing. If I have to live an eternity like this, I need to understand what it is to be a vampire. Stefan can help with some of it. Self control, patience, those are Stefan’s specialties. But you’ve always been his other half, Damon, and I need that too. How to live with anger, thirst…how to lose control without completely losing control. And I need to learn those too. Besides,” she shot him a playful smile, “you’re not as bad as Stefan thinks you are. Or as you pretend to be.”
Damon grinned at Elena’s naivety. He wondered if she’d feel the same way if she knew how Stefan dismembered his victims. It’s not that simple, he thought. The brothers had lived long enough to know what it meant to be a predator. Damon recalled earlier times, when the pleasure of a kill brought him excitement only a young vampire could experience. There was a fine line between humanity and depravity; being one of the undead lets you dance in both worlds. As a vampire, he knew Elena was strong. But she could be so much stronger…Damon once again directed his attention to the brunette. “It’s not something you live with,” he began, frustrated. He enjoyed what he was; he had been a vampire so long he often forgot when it meant to be mortal. Vampirism freed Damon from the trivial worries that came with humanity. Never worrying about old age or disease. The world was his playground and he was no longer shackled by the mundane world of humans. “It’s something that happens to you,” He continued, choosing his words carefully. “Self control, anger, patience, thirst…” Damon trailed. “Such a fine line.” He paused for a moment. “In this world, it’s kill or be killed.” He wondered what Stefan was doing to help her transition and recalled her inability to keep animal blood down. Stefan was always morally righteous in that way. Damon recalled when Stefan slaughtered an entire village. The way rippers do. His cobalt gaze found hers. “Aren’t you the least bit curious to know what you’re capable of?” Damon’s expression this time was piercing; still, like marble.












