Be still my heart, I'm only a moment away.

Relax my beloved, don't worry for me, Don't shed a tear for me always be near for me. Be confident my love don't bow your head for me, Promise you'll smile for me don't ever cry for me. You know these walls they may fall down, But I'll still hold on to you, At heights higher than you'd imagine me too. danial rana, 20.

[rcdroses]

With Caspian’s emotions running high, his skin felt so much more perceptive to Danial’s touch, his body tingling with something he couldn’t really put a finger on.The way his boyfriend’s lips moved against him was something Caspian could never get tired of, his body craving for more of his touch as he made grabby hands. At Danial’s confession, he nodded as best as he could without pulling away from the kiss, a feat quite hard when they were leaning over the centre console. But it had been as though Danial knew what he was thinking because within a matter of seconds, his boyfriend was settled on his lap. Caspian’s hands went to his back, hands slipping under his shirt so he could stroke at his heated skin slowly, tongue working its way into Danial’s mouth as he let a pleased moan. “I missed you more,” Caspian replied as easily, surging forward for another kiss that was only broken by the high whine that left his throat the second he felt the sweet pleasure of Danial’s hips rolled against his “Fuck- still miss you, miss you right now” He murmured, trying to roll his hips up for that sharp shooting pleasure once more. He missed touching his boyfriend, he missed being with him and looking at his face. He could only feel his heart expand in his chest when he heard the words again, “Don’t make me cry right now” Caspian chuckled softly, hands working down to Danial’s jeans, unbuttoning them swiftly. “I love you so much, stay forever please. Could let you do whatever to me, we can kiss each other whenever too” He breathed against his lips before he got the message, leaning back to pull his shirt up over his head clumsily. Caspian took a moment to stare up at Danial’s face, take in the features he had fallen in love with long long ago and the eyes he had missed. “God you’re so beautiful” He moaned, eyes fluttering close unwillingly when he felt his boyfriend’s hand palm at his hard cock, his own hands coming down to Danial’s hips before dipping into his underwear. He ripped his eyes down to where his hands disappeared into Danial’s jeans, his fingers curled around his length as he released him from his boxers. Caspian almost drooled at the sight. “God, want you in me”

[danialok]

Being close like this again was almost too much, but simultaneously not enough. Their hips pressing together, their hot breaths mixing, their hands finally all over each other. God, he needed this. It was no wonder the two of them got so heated when fighting, because they didn't have as many moments like this to really let loose like Danial was sure they both needed. Every word his boyfriend spoke only urged him on, a faint smirk on his lips as he spoke only to let out a breathy laugh as he mentioned not wanting to cry, eyes flickering down to watch his boyfriends large hands work his pants off. "Whatever to you, huh?" He asked with a grin, sitting back to watch his boyfriends shirt come off, eyes shamelessly drinking in the sight of him. Letting his gaze lift, his eyes found Caspian's and he could feel his heart nearly exploding in his chest, a tint of red touching his cheeks at his compliment as he added slight pressure against him. "And you're perfect," he breathed out, just before inhaling sharply as he felt his boyfriends hand wrapped around him. "Fuck," he whispered, eyelids fluttering as his hips rocked towards his hand. "I missed you touching me, so badly," Danial added, his free hand moving up his boyfriends bare stomach and chest until his fingers were tangling deep into his thick curls, hips rocking towards his hand. "I think we should go back to that whole letting me do whatever I want thing," Danial breathed out, eyelids fluttering as he gave his hair a light tug back until their eyes met. "Starting with me fucking you in this parking lot, maybe have you ride me. Then go back to your place, shower, fuck you against the wall in there," he continued, pausing for a moment only to let out a groan before leaning in to press a heated kiss to his lips. "We've got too much time to make up for, you're going to be really fucking sore by the time you drop me off here again," he spoke against his lips with a smirk.

[rcdroses]

Caspian felt his shoulders slump at his boyfriend’s words. Though positive and somewhat, what he wanted to hear, he couldn’t help the weird feeling in his stomach that maybe Danial was only giving him what he wanted. But the words that followed seemed to help ease his worries. Caspian tried to smile but all he felt was the sheer force of it all, far too fake and he decided against it. Instead, he wrung his hands carefully, playing with the rings on his knuckles “If you don’t want that then don’t…act like its a burden for you to be here” He whispered, too tired to make any effort. He let out a soft sigh, the knots in his back only tightening in exhaustion. Though they fought hard and sometimes it resulted in complete chaos, when they returned to one another it was as easy as coming home. When Danial nodded slowly, Caspian felt his heart expand from its tight restriction, hand finding his easily. He craved his touch, a soft sigh punched out of him when he tangled their fingers together. It felt good to touch and be touched and it felt even better with the weight off of his shoulders. Caspian offered him a small smile at his words, “You do?” He asked quietly, watching as his boyfriend leaned across, his heart leaping to his throat. His hands found Danial’s waist as he kissed him hard, something so completely Danial that it had left something burning within Caspian. He pressed hard against his mouth, kissing him eagerly like he had wanted when he first landed. But before he knew it Danial was pulling away, his words falling on deaf ears as a whimper was drawn out of Caspian. He sought forward, eyes barely open as he parted his lips and captured the ones before him. “Just a sec” He murmured against his boyfriend’s lips, kissing him hard and feverish, lips parting open as his tongue tried to coax Danial’s lips apart, flicking against the seam of his lips. His hand rubbed slow circles into his hip, inching his shirt up just enough until he could rest his hand at his bare skin. “Can’t just kiss me like that and expect me to drive” Caspian frowned, leaning further across the center console, hands groping lazily at Danial’s thigh and waist. 

[danialok]

Letting a short laugh slip out as he pulled away, Danial's eyes stayed fixed on Caspian's. There was something about his touch that made it so easy to forget all the prior tenseness and focus only on the boy in front of him and how kissable his lips looked right then. The little whimper he let out though was nearly enough to say fuck it, but Danial wasn't sure how romantic making out in the front seat would be. That thought though was quickly pushed aside as he felt his boyfriends lips against his again. "Okay," Danial breathed out in response against his lips, head nodding slightly as his own eyes fluttered close. Within seconds of Caspian's lips against his, both his hands moved to grip Caspian's face as a muffled moan slipped into the kiss. Bringing one hand down to unbuckle his seat belt, Danial found himself shifting in his seat to face Caspian better. The moment he felt his boyfriend's tongue against his lips, his own parted and his tongue was happily finding Caspian's. It was a clumsy kiss, the small confinements making it hard to get as into it as Danial wanted. However they managed to make it work, and the way Caspian's hands felt on his thighs and waist only had Danial melting, getting deeper into the moment. "Fuck driving," he mumbled against his lips as he reached one hand down to unbuckle his boyfriends belt. Within seconds the male was clumsily climbing his way into Caspian’s lap, back arching towards him as he was trapped between his boyfriend and the steering wheel. "I missed you," he found himself gasping between heated kissed, hands moving to tangle deep into his boyfriends thick curls, hips rolling down against his. "And god, I love you so much," Danial added desperately, lips moving fervently with his boyfriends as his hands moved on their own accord; one tangled in his hair, the other finding his shirt and tugging at it before sliding down to slip between them so he was able to palm at the front of his pants. It had been too long, and there had been too many heavy emotions between them. He didn't want that anymore, didn't want to think about any of it. They were together, right here, right there. And nothing mattered more right than then giving into everything he knew they were both feeling.

[rcdroses]

Caspian winced at the raise of Danial’s voice. It seemed like things were only getting worse and worse. Though, it wasn’t as though Danial was expressing that he hadn’t cared about the boy. Everything he was doing was positive and assuring, it was just the delivery that had Caspian cowering. He understood what Danial was saying and it was nice to hear but he just couldn’t bring himself to believe it. Caspian’s shoulder slumped and he could feel the tears welling in his eyes. He didn’t want to cry, he wasn’t about to cry. He just wanted everything to be better and he knew crying wasn’t going to solve his problems. Caspian took a moment to turn his back to Danial, wiping away his eyes quickly with the sleeve of his shirt. He sniffled back any tears before he turned back to the man beside him. “I care. I care a lot okay. If you care about my feelings then just.. make it easier for me” He sighed, leaning back against the seat. 

Caspian’s head was starting to ache with every swallow. The pressure built up in his ears and he could feel the dull ache at the base of his skull inching up to his temples. “It’s not bullshit” He murmured quietly, “If you don’t wanna be here then I’m not about to beg you to stay. I want someone who wants to be here and be with me because they want to not because they have to. So this is your fucking ultimatum Danial you’re free to leave if thats what you want, fee of any baggage. I won’t call you or contact you to beg you to stay. You can leave if you don’t wanna be with me and solve this problem instead of just getting angry at me for feeling the way I do” Caspian was starting to get emotionally riled up again, he could feel it in his throat. “ Then why are you punishing me with all this passive aggressive bullshit and hostility. If you came here to fight then I would’ve gladly flew to New York so you could do that - I would’ve or I would’ve paid a good price to let you scream at me on the phone” 

At Danial’s words, Caspian let out a soft sigh, tension rolling off of his shoulders. He nodded solemnly at his boyfriend’s apology. “It’s okay” He resigned, “I’m sorry for.. bringing this all up. I should’ve just known not to…I do.. trust you and I understand why you’re upset” He murmured, sitting upright in his seat. His hands hovered over his keys, ready to just put everything away and leave. Hearing Danial repeat his words had Caspian wincing but the words that followed eased any tightness in his chest. He turned to look at him, reaching out tentatively. Caspian brushed the tips of his fingers against Danial’s wrist, a faint smile on his lips. “That’s the first time you’ve said it properly, did you know that?” He murmured, wiping away at his damp cheeks. “I love you too”

[danialok]

Every word Caspian spoke in return only seemed to add to how exhausted Danial was. This was the first time either of them had gotten off the plane and the two hadn't found the quickest place to sneak off and make out heavily, shove their hands in the other's pants, or dropped right onto their knees. It was a strange shift, and quite a different vibe than what he was used to when they first reunited. But unfortunately, this was the case. And the two were stuck dealing with it until it was resolved. Although Danial was getting very sick of how negative Caspian was being, every mention of him leaving had him forcing his anger back, not wanting to think about it. He wasn't leaving. He didn't want to be anywhere else. And that was that. "I want to be here, just stop it," Danial spoke after a moment, a loud dramatic sigh leaving him right after. "Stop telling me I can leave and acting as if I would actually take that offer, you know I don't want that."

By now there was a frown fixed on his lips, one he couldn't imagine would be leaving anytime soon. "I'm not trying to punish you, like I said, I was upset." Licking his lips, Danial looked down at his legs, just now noticing how badly his leg was shaking from tapping anxiously against the car floor. He wanted out of there badly, but unfortunately for him they hadn't even left the airport. Listening as he accepted the apology, Danial felt the slightest bit of relief, hoping this would put an end to their little argument and they would be ok.

Chewing on his lower lip nervously, he nodded slightly as he went on, only for his gaze to lift at the feeling of his hand on his wrist. Staring at him with a blank expression for a moment, Danial finally nodded slowly, his hand turning just enough to allow his fingertips to lightly trace along Caspian's. "I know," he responded simply, his eyes finding their hands. It was a calming view, something he always enjoyed looking at when they were together. Maybe it was odd, he didn't care though. Seeing Caspian's hand right there, feeling his warmth—it was his home, where he belongs. Lifting his head just in time to watch as he wiped his tears, he felt a small smile tug at the corners of his lips as he heard Caspian return those three little words. "I know," Danial mumbled after a moment, a short, tired laugh leaving him just before he was leaning towards the drivers side; hands gently gripping his cheeks just before he was pressing a hard kiss to his lips. The faintest of sighs left him, fingertips lightly tangling into his thick curls as he focused on how amazing it felt to have his boyfriends lips against his own again. "Let's go, I really want to just kiss you right now," he mumbled against his lips just before he was pulling back, gaze locked on Caspian. "And drive fast or I may cause an accident, I really don't know how much longer I can wait to do that again."

[rcdroses]

Caspian had thought that they were going to work through it, but yet again, Danial was doing whatever he could to just end the conversation. It hurt to say the least. Any sort of conflict was foreign to Caspian. He hardly ever saw his parents fight, they were always so loved up with one another and that was exactly what he was like with Danial. But on the off occasion that they were fighting, it was torturous for him. All he wanted was to just cuddle with Danial and tell him he loved him. He wanted to feel him against his skin, mouth mapping over the places on his body he knew he belong. Caspian had missed him so dearly, his heart hurting at the reminder that his boyfriend was living and breathing and being happy elsewhere in the world and not beside him. It brought a sharp pain to his chest. To say that Caspian was clingy was sort of an understatement. But that was him, he fell in love too quickly. And when he did all he wanted to do was suffocate himself in everything Danial. He wanted to drown himself in every aspect of Danial’s life and he just wanted to be there, so starting a long distance relationship was really challenging everything he stood for. 

“I do trust you” Caspian sighed, shaking his head at his boyfriend’s comment. “But it’s not you I don’t fucking trust alright. I can’t help it, you don’t - you don’t see it the way I do alright? We’re from two different worlds” He shut his eyes, trying to compose himself for a moment. “I mean.. look at you, I - you’re so.. perfect, just everything about you. It was so easy for me to fall for you, whats stopping anyone else?” He could feel his chest heaving out of frustration, “And me? I’m just some stupid kid from fucking Glasgow, -” Caspian wasn’t about to make this a pity party for himself. He wasn’t going to use a self-depreciating act just to explain himself, however much truth went into it. “Are you going to blame me? For being afraid of losing you? Are you really?” He asked, his voice cracking against his will. He cleared his throat quickly, swallowing the lump in his throat. He could feel his ears close at the pressure, “Do you know what the statistics of a long distance relationship lasting is? 70% of relationships fail. I don’t want that o be us. Why couldn’t you just … indulge and tell me it was going to be alright? Why couldn’t you just entertain that for me?” Caspian scoffed at Danial’s comment. “No” He finally spoke, turning to look at him. “No I’m not happy and no I don’t wanna do this. I don’t want any of your fucking passive aggressive shit I wanna solve this right now. And if you don’t wanna fucking solve it then you should leave and never call me ever again” Caspian watched him, “So what is it?”

[danialok]

Danial knew well that scoffing was the least productive thing to do, but the moment Caspian mentioned other people liking him he couldn't help it. It was a frustrating situation, long distance, having to assure your boyfriend everything was ok when he claimed it was that other people were the problem. "Who fucking cares, Caspian?" The older male snapped, eyes wide as he shook his head in annoyance. He didn't understand it, why it would matter. People could like him, it was very likely. But it didn't matter because Danial would never give it a second thought. Nothing mattered to him but Caspian, not even trying to achieve his dream career meant more to him than Caspian which was saying something when he came from a family very based on working hard for the things they wanted. But when it came to what Danial wanted, Caspian was always the first thing that came into his mind. And anyone who knew him already knew that, including anyone who may or may not have feelings for him. "Who cares if every single friend of mine liked me? Who cares? Not me. You know why? Because it's only your feelings that I care about. Anyone else could pine after me, could write poems, songs, confess their undying love for me and i would not even be phased because I have you." He didn't mean to shout, he hated when he got too upset because he hated upsetting Caspian. But it wasn't fair, especially for Caspian to claim he was being unfair.

"Stop comparing yourself to other people. Stop looking at statistics. We aren't just some fucking statistic, ok? We are real people, living real lives, in a real fucking relationship. I'm not just some number on some chart and neither are you. I'm a person, who fucking loves you." Taking a moment to catch his breath, his hands lifted to rub over his face, feeling nothing but completely drained. "Save your bullshit, both of us know I'm not leaving, and even if I did you would be blowing my phone up before I even landed." There was a glare shot right at Caspian, although he didn't mean much harm by it. It was just hard to sit and listen to words he knew Caspian didn't mean. Or that he at least couldn't accept him meaning. "What it is, is that you need to take your head out of you ass and realize that I love you. If i didn't, why would I put myself through this? I have to deal with the distance too, I have to deal with the pain, living without you most of the time. I have to fall asleep alone in bed too. I don't get to kiss you every morning either. It isn't just you going through this, it isn't just you who's scared. So stop coming up with reasons why we might not work and focus on the fact that we have, for almost a year now. Not to mention all the years we were doing whatever else. I'm in this just as much as you."

Leaning back again, his hands slid up to run through his dark hair. "I'm sorry for not assuring you everything was fine, I just.. god. I got upset. And I hope you can see why. But if not then whatever, not much I can do about it." Swallowing the dry lump in his throat, his hands fell into his lap again with a soft thud, shifting a little in his seat. "You really are a stupid kid from Glasglow, but you happen to be the best things that's ever happened to me. And not even the most perfect person in the world could take me from you." Tilting his head towards him, Danial let out a soft sigh, eyes staying fixed on his boyfriend. "I love you," he added after a moment, voice quiet as he kept his gaze fixed on the green eyes staring back at him.

[rcdroses]

The whole back and forth was too passive aggressive for Caspian. Though, at times he liked to admit he was nothing but passive aggressive. He couldn’t control his emotions, too sensitive and too overbearing but the only way he could properly express it was by commenting on everything little thing that Danial did. If he was jealous, he wanted his boyfriend to assure him that it was fine. But Caspian didn’t get any of that which only left him even more upset. Maybe it was his fault but he couldn’t help but feel that if Danial truly didn’t want to be here than he shouldn’t have come at all. Caspian was more than happy to wait for the next however many weeks until Danial returned - he waited a lot, he was fairly patient.  

He wasn’t exactly sure what he wanted to come out of the next few weeks Danial was going to stay. Was their fight going to magically disappear? Did he have to apologise for being afraid of losing his boyfriend. Caspian had to admit, he’d beg for mercy if it meant he didn’t have to lose Danial. He had grown far too attached, needed him in every way. He hoped that Danial felt the same way, especially since Caspian was quite suffocating. Long distance relationship were destined to fail, he had read that and his sisters had also managed to explain that to him at dinner almost every single night. Caspian though, had better hopes for his relationship with Danial. He wanted to grow old with him, wanted to eventually move in together and get married. Caspian loved him with all his heart and he hoped that some stupid fight wasn’t going to be the reason why that happened. 

The short, curt comments that he was given by Danial had only made his heart sink even further into his stomach. He wasn’t used to hostility when it came to Danial and he wasn’t used to it barely twenty minutes since his boyfriend had landed. Usually at this time, they were in the backseats with their hands in each others pants, chasing after their release. But this was something else. “Just… stop” Caspian breathed, turning the car off and hitting his fists against the steering wheel. “Just.. fucking stop Danial, this isn’t fair” he cussed, turning to the man beside him. His heart was pounding too fast, eyes starting to water against his will. He wasn’t supposed to cry, not yet anyways. “You’re not fair. You think I haven’t been wracking my brains the past few nights wondering if you were even going to show? You think I was unaffected these last few days? I get it, it was my fault but you’re being so.. unfair” He frowned, wiping away at the frustrated tears that had gathered at the corner of his eyes. “If you don’t wanna be here, then you can leave. I don’t - want to fight at all. I was just, scared of losing you. Don’t you get it? We’re so fucking far away from each other I just don’t …want to lose you” 

[danialok]

Slowly, Danial pulled his attention forward, expecting to begin moving. Only seconds later he was caught off guard by the engine being cut and his boyfriend speaking out in a breathy tone. Just as he looked over at him again, he was jumping due to Caspian's sudden outburst as he hit the steering wheel. Danial's own eyes widened in shock, taking in his every word. His own heart began to race, hands closing into fists instinctively as their gazes met. Despite how upset he was, he could feel the tug at his heart as he recognized the tears welling in his eyes. Yeah, Danial was pissed off but nothing made watching his boyfriend cry bearable. Licking his lips as he averted his gaze, he inhaled sharply, exhaling slowly as Caspian continued to speak. Never had he imagined not showing up, not seeing Caspian's face. He wouldn't have been able to handle not coming, not seeing his boyfriend, not holding him while he fell asleep that night, not nuzzling his face against his neck and being able to just breathe in his scent. But god, he was angry. Very angry. Angry that he would bring that up when he did, why he couldn't just wait until they were in person was beyond him. It would have been a simple conversation, one he could have been more level headed in. But any amount of time away from Caspian made being logical smart. It heightened his emotions, made him cranky and anxious. And to have that thrown at him days before he was supposed to go spend weeks with his boyfriend? It wasn't something he needed.

"Just trust me, that's all you have to do. Trust me." A frustrated sigh left him, head tilting back against the headrest as he tried to keep his cool. "I'm with you, Caspian. You're the one I fly out to see every chance I get, and wait anxiously for you to come see me when you can. Why can't you realize that?" Opening his eyes after a moment, he finally looked over at him again, feeling the heat rising in his cheeks. "I'm mad because these last few days I couldn't even sit and be excited, I couldn't spend every second staring at the clock wishing it was time to go to the airport. I sat there pissed off and annoyed because my own boyfriend, who I am about to come see, thinks he isn't the only thing I want." Shaking his head a little, he tightened his fists before letting his hands relax flat against his knees. "I'm not trying to be unfair, but I can't just be ok. You couldn't have just fucking waited until I—" pausing for a moment, he took another breath as he focused on letting his voice go back to a normal speaking level, having gotten louder with almost every word. "You should have just waited. So we could talk about it in person. It would have been such a better out come. I probably would have actually kissed you when I got off the plane." And again, the spite in his voice came back at the end, not holding back the eye roll as he forced his eyes out his own window. 

"I'm here, I'm not with anyone else. It's just fucking you. So can you be happy now? And can we go?" Crossing his arms, he slumped back against his seat as he refused to look at the other male, biting down hard on his lower lip in attempt to keep back any other comment he came up with.

[danialok]

saifaljfr:

Caspian knew that getting on Danial’s good side was no easy feat - he always had to work hard for it, especially if Danial was in a mood. And normally, Caspian was so good at it, figured he could make an occupation of it if he let him. But this time around, he was just so nervous, chest tight in anticipation. He didn’t know what was going to happen, if someone Caspian did could trigger Danial’s fight or flight response - ultimately leaving him alone. He tried not to think about it, even though he could see the annoyance build up between the crease of Danial’s eyebrows. He hoped for the best, listened to his boyfriend’s words carefully. “You can rest when we get back to my place, I changed the sheets and everything. I can light up the candles you liked from last time, maybe even draw you a bath” Caspian offered quietly, lifting his head. He felt his heart drop into his chest when Danial caught his eye, no softness or want to just drop everything and embrace each other. It wasn’t something Caspian was used to nor was it something he wanted to get used to. “I - just didn’t think you wanted to see me because of what happened” He uttered quietly, more to himself than to Danial. The las thing he wanted was for his boyfriend to get even more upset, he didn’t want to be the one to trigger that. 

Caspian let Danial grab his duffel bag, heart beating just a tad faster as he watched his boyfriend carefully. The tension rolled off his back though, the second Danial took his hand. Though it was to guide him through the crowd, Caspian held on, squeezing his hand gently as he let out a deep breath. “No alcohol, sorry” He murmured, brushing his thumb gently over Danial’s as they move passed the doors. Caspian hummed softly as he tried to recall where he had parked the car, tugging Danial’s hand towards the direction, “Over here, 3B.” When Danial had let go of his hand, he froze. Caspian tried not to react, didn’t bother looking back towards him and instead curled his hands into little fists as he lead his boyfriend towards his parked car. The walk towards his car was quiet, Caspian keeping his distance a few quick steps away from Danial. His mind was running with possibilities, chest tight. He could feel the tears prickling the back of his eyes, mind jumping to conclusions. Caspian didn’t bother to offer to take Danial’s duffel, instead he just unlocked his car and got into the front seat. Starting the car, he took his time in pulling the seat belt over him as he waited for Danial to get adjusted. 

It wasn't often that Danial found himself in this bad of a mood, especially when he was in the company of his boyfriend. He loved Caspian, more than anything. But the whole fight seemed to really get to him this time. In a way even he hadn't anticipated. Normally being around each other was enough to cool him off, help him chill a little. But today it was different, and he was finding it very hard to find or keep his chill. It took everything in him not to roll his eyes at the comment about not wanting to see him, choosing to glance in the opposite direction for a moment as he inhaled deeply. Calm down. Everything is ok. Caspian wasn't doing anything wrong right then, in fact he was being his nice, adorable self. It just so happened that right then Danial didn't care how nice he was being, and instead was far too irritated with the fact that they had to deal with some stupid fight right before he got there.

"It's fine," it was a short response when mentioning no alcohol, that was probably better anyway. Danial was good at holding his alcohol, but not so much his emotions when alcohol was involved. And right then he was doing everything he could to hold back just how frustrated he was with his boyfriend. The moment Caspian froze was a little hard to miss, Danial forcing his gaze down to his feet so he wouldn't focus on the fact that they were both most likely noticing just how tense and awkward things still were between them. "Okay, cool," he mumbled halfheartedly in response to him mentioning the aisle the car was parked in. The silence was almost deafening, Danial could hear their every step, could feel his heart almost causing his body to shake with each beat. This was not how he wanted to spend their time together, but fuck, what was he supposed to do? He was upset, Caspian seemed upset as well. Great. Just great.

Reaching the car, Danial quickly tossed his bag into the backseat before making his way up to the passengers side. Getting into the seat, he tugged the belt over his lap and made sure it was fastened before his gaze shifted out his window. "A nap might be good," he finally responded to his prior comments. "Haven't been able to sleep much the last few nights." The tone of his voice was a lost cause by now, even if he wanted to hold back how he was feeling it wasn't going to be possible. He was too upset, too irked, too frustrated to act like he was fine. "Can't imagine why, but hopefully I'll actually get some good rest." The slight jab didn't phase Danial much, maybe Caspian needed to really know just how upset Danial was, maybe it would stop him from constantly questioning his friendship with others, or picking fights days before they were about to spend time together. Licking his lower lip, he finally looked over at Caspian again, eyeing him for a moment before sighing heavily. "Let's go, yeah? I've been on a plane for too long, I need to relax."

[caspiansnclr-blog]

All the anxiety building in the base of his throat, the way his chest had been so tight and his heart beating relentlessly in his ears had disappeared the second he had heard Danial’s voice, his warm hand slipping in his. Caspian let out a shaky breath of relief, letting his eyes scan over everything Danial, his eyes much browner than he had remembered, hair much darker and the light scruff around his mouth and over his cheeks. He just wanted to reach up and hold the older boy’s face in his hands and kiss him all over but there was still that small voice at the back of his mind, the jealousy that settled under his breastbone. Caspian couldn’t even enjoy the kiss that Danial had pressed to the corner of his lips, a frown settling just where the older boy had been. He tried his hardest not to pout or sulk, knowing that it was mostly his fault why they were awkward in the first place. It would’ve been smarter if he brought up the topic after they had reunited and he had gotten his kisses and maybe some welcome home sex - now they were just fermenting in tension. Caspian choked back a sob when he heard defeated sigh that left Danial’s lips, the worst thoughts coming to ming. Danial could afford to take a plane all the way to Scotland just to break up with him. That was at least the most respectful thing to do. But all his worries disappeared as soon as he was engulfed in everything Danial, his cologne wafting up for him to inhale as he followed his lead, his own nose pressed against the older boys neck. “I miss you so much” He trembled, pressing a line of faint kisses where his neck met his shoulders. Caspian shut his eyes momentarily, arms winding tighter around Danial’s shoulders as he indulged in just being in the boy’s embrace after having not seen him for a full eight weeks. “Missed you so much” Caspian added just before they pulled away, his chest tightening all over again. He knew the reunion wasn’t enough to smooth everything over, especially since his mind was only replaying the response he got from Danial over the matter. Pressing his lips into a tight line, he tried to ignore any hurt he felt in his throat when Danial’s smile disappeared just as fast as it had appeared. Nodding his head, he followed him towards the baggage area, unsure if his voice was going to give away as soon as he spoke. “How - how was the flight?” Caspian stammered, scrubbing his hand down his face. “It’s.. good to see you. I’m really glad you came” 

[danialok]

Each step Danial took towards the baggage claim felt more difficult than the last, the heavy tenseness between them was almost too much to bare. But he was here, they had to make it through this. If not, he'd just have to catch catch the soonest flight home. A thought he had often, although he wasn't really sure he would ever have the heart to actually cut a trip early. Deciding to push the thoughts back, he glanced towards Caspian as he spoke, feeling the guilt begin to build up inside of him as he recognized how uncomfortable his boyfriend was. Nodding slightly in response, Danial focused forward again as he walked; shoulders shrugging as his fingers toyed with the strap on his backpack. "It wasn't bad, exhausted per usual, but not bad," he spoke, another slight shrug following. God, they were both beginning to annoy him. They were together, they loved each other, why did they always do this shit? Allowing his gaze to find Caspian again, Danial stayed quiet until they were stopped in front of the baggage area and waited for the luggage to begin their way down. "It's good to see you too, and of course I came. We had this planned, I wouldn't just bail." The words came out with a bit more attitude than he had intended, only causing a sigh of frustration to leave his lips. However, just before he could say much more he heard the buzz notifying them that the luggage was coming, pulling his attention away for the moment.

It was a bit of a relief, having a minute to focus on anything but his boyfriend, anything but their weird, annoying vibe. Reaching down to grab his duffel bag, Danial pulled it over his shoulder then used his free hand to tug Caspian through the thin crowd and towards the exit. "Let's just get to the car, I need to relax. Happen to have any alcohol with you?" A short, dry laugh let his lips, grip tightening on the younger males hand as he quickly led them right out the door. "Where's the car?" Danial asked, stopping in his tracks a few feet away from the door. Contemplating for a moment, he gave their hands a quick glance just before he was once again releasing Caspian's hand and allowing it to slide into the pocket of his jeans.

[danialok]

caspiansnclr:

Caspian sunk his top row of teeth into his already swollen lip as his chest tightened in anxiousness, glancing around hurriedly looking for a parking as though he were late despite having arrived at the airport much earlier than supposed to. Maybe it had been because he wasn’t even sure if Danial was even coming this time around. They’d gotten into a stupid argument and while Caspian tried to make up before one of them flew in, this time it had spawned too quickly and his own bitterness brewed stubbornly in the back of his throat. There was no communication the night before, no mention of the trip since the fight had happened. Caspian never meant to get so jealous, he was only supposed to get mildly jealous, enough for some light reassurance and a little cheering up. But he wasn’t getting the response he wanted from Danial and it only left him blowing up the fight into so much more. He couldn’t help it. They were in a long distance relationship, they had been fucking around before they even started dating. It was almost expected that Danial would get bored of him. Nevertheless, as he reversed into an empty parking spot, his mind went over the possible scenarios. Danial had sent over his itinerary when he had planned the trip but the possibility of the older male cancelling the trip was clouding his mind desperately. It only had Caspian out of the car as quickly as possible, pressing his bowler hat tighter on his head as though his arrival at the gate would only force the plane to land quicker. Despite knowing the older boy was still annoyed at him, Caspian still wanted to dress nicely - but not too nicely. Sucking in a deep breath, he cursed himself for not plucking up the courage to at least text Danial about how excited he was to see him, like he did before every trip. Maybe even an angry Skype call that turned into angry Skype sex could’ve settled his heart but having absolutely no idea whether or not the boy cancelled his trip only had Caspian’s tightened chest throb uncomfortably. It felt like hours as he paced around the arrival gate, heart beating agitatedly. While he had a lot of faith in Danial, this trip was everything they talked about, he didn’t want to be let down. Chewing his bottom lip, he waited until any sign of the older boy appeared. Whether it be his dark hair or the light scruff he had saw a few days ago through Skype.

It would be a lie if Danial claimed to not have thought about simply cancelling his ticket and not catching his flight. There was a stubbornness about the raven haired male that had him highly considering it, without the intention of even warning his boyfriend. But there was an even larger part of him that couldn't stand the thought of cancelling his first time being able to see Caspian in person in the last 8 weeks. Distance was killer, especially when the two of them were so prone to butting heads and both getting too wound up and prideful to be the bigger man. There was no doubting just how much they cared for each other, it had been five years of interest shared between them and now that they were finally together, it seemed like they only got deeper and deeper into each other. But the two of them had yet to figure out how to deal with the tension and frustration of their relationship being lived through phone screens and skype calls majority of the time. Danial found himself mumbling bitterly to himself as the plane landed and he waited to exit the plane. It felt like hours before he was finally stepping off the plane and making his way through the gate, ignoring the nervous tightening in his stomach. Despite his frustration towards Cas, he couldn't deny how badly he wanted to see him. There was just something about his stupidly adorable curls and piercing green eyes that had Danial unable to resist the younger male, no matter how much he got under his skin. 

One hand clutching the strap of the backpack hanging off his shoulder, his gaze stayed on the floor in front of him, watching carefully with each step he took before he noticed the opening just a few feet in front of him. Taking a deep breath, his head lifted, unsure whether or not Caspian would be there yet or not. Within seconds his eyes landed on the familiar male pacing back and forth, the sight causing a faint smile to form on his lips, just before the male quickly pushed it back as he made his way closer. "Hey," Danial spoke up, clearing his throat as he stopped just behind Caspian, free hand reaching to take his and guiding the male towards him. There was an obvious awkward tension in the moment, even as he leaned in to press a quick kiss to the corner of his boyfriends lips, his hand lingering in his for a moment before dropping it. Glancing around, he Danial's teeth sunk into his lower lip momentarily as he racked his brain for something to say. Finally, with a defeated sigh he found himself reaching out and wrapping his arms tightly around his boyfriends slim frame, face nuzzling into his neck. "Missed you," he breathed against his skin, eyes closing as he focused solely on how good it felt to be holding him again and attempted to push back the annoyance still flooding him. "Let's go get my bags, yeah?" Danial asked as he pulled away moments later, offering a quick smile before letting it fall just as fast as it had appeared.