I got tired of having people telling me who I am, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I feel, like if they knew better than me. I opened my doors to many people, I gave them my company, my time, I gave them all of myself because inside of me what was important was to share with them, because I wanted to be with them, because they meant a lot in my life. But I guess we all know how it always ends right? I am sharing this here, because I don't feel like I have someone with whom I can talk about this completely. It took me so long to see myself alone again, alone when I open my eyes in the morning, alone when I am having lunch at home, alone every night, alone at love, alone. It doesn't mean being alone is bad, but when you have been alone so long that you can't remember anything else, you start wondering what's wrong with you. I don't regret any of the love I gave to the people in my life, but I do regret choosing them instead of choosing me, I regret being running with people to reach their dreams, and being there for them because it was important. I regret it, because I forgot how to dream myself, and they didn't help me remember, they knew I was lost, and believe it or not, for some of this people that was convenient. I stood up, and when I did, there were problems. When I kept asking for the answers to the questions I always had, I was a problem. When I got mad at everything that was suppose to drive me mad, I was overreacting, or I had different faces, and when I apologized about this things, even knowing I didn't had to, but I wanted to keep it cool, they acted like if I were, in fact, the one who was wrong. They made me believe I meant something in their lifes, and then I wasn't, suddenly I was ordinary. It took me a lot to get over it tho, they broke my heart, and, they caused me a lot of pain. But now I'm taking the power back, no one is gonna stop me, and honestly, the crown looks better on me. Fuck them all.
jacobvanloon
blakekathryn
theartofmadeline
