How to Transition from a Job to Your Mission, Passion and Purpose
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer. Thank you so much for joining me today. Today, I want to speak to you about how to transition from a job to your mission, your passion, and your purpose. I'm speaking from experience because that's exactly what I was able to accomplish several years ago. I had been an internet entrepreneur for -- now, it's been almost 20 years. And even though I was in a business that I had created, I was no longer passionate about it. What I've come to discover is that our passions and our purpose, they evolve over time. I don't believe that it's something that is fixed. So, in different seasons of your life, you're passionate about different things. You may be at a point in your life right now where you say, "You know what? I've got a good job over here. I enjoy it. It provides me financial security. I even like the people that I work with. I like what I do, but I know it's not my mission. I know it's not my passion. I know it's not my purpose." So, if you can relate to that, you're in one of two positions right now. You either know it's not your passion and your purpose, but you don't know what is. Or, you know what it is, but you're simply not moving towards it. So, I want to address both of those for you today.
If you don't know what your passion and your purpose is, but you know that what you're doing is not it, you simply need to ask. There is an incredible, incredible power that we rarely utilize and we know it's in the great spiritual teachings, "You ask and you shall receive." "Seek and you shall find." "Knock and it shall be revealed unto you." But, all you need to do is ask in whatever asking looks like for you. For me, at this point in my life, I was saying, "God -- because, for me, I use God -- what is it that you would like me to do? How can I be of most effective use to my fellow man? What is it that I can be doing where I can not only contribute, but I can create the abundance and the prosperity that I want in my life?" I didn't just ask once. I asked over, and over, and over, and over again. At the same time, I dropped any of the resistance I started to feel about my current life situation and this is critical. What's very important is that, if you want to be over here, but you're over here, the key to making the transition is for you to find all the gratitude, all the appreciation, all the wonder, all the blessings in where you're at because the tendency of human beings is that once we realize we want to be somewhere else, unconsciously we start to resent where we're at. We start to become frustrated. We start to become impatient. So, it's very, very important for you to look at all the blessings in your current life situation, how life has brought you to this point. You know you're not going to be there forever, but for the time being, you're provided for, and to really appreciate that experience. That will help you move on to the next chapter of your life faster than anything else I can suggest to you.
The other thing for you to do is to start paying attention to the responses that life gives you because the moment you start asking, you'll start to get some feedback. It took me a little while, but I would say about six or seven months into asking for guidance, I was in Sarasota, Florida, I was at an event called the Chalk Festival. There were these artists who were drawing chalk on the ground. I saw a young boy who was chalking the American flag, and it was really unusual this emotional response that I had because I started to cry. And so, as I started having this interaction with reality as it was showing up for me, I started to pay attention to what I was thinking. I remember thinking, that young man has hopes and dreams. But, when he becomes older, he's going to get stuck and he's going to give up on them. So, I realized that I was having this reaction to life as it was showing up for me and that was a clue to what it was that I was going to be very, very passionate about and, of course, I do that today. I help people live extraordinary lives. I help people become limitless. I help people who are feeling stuck and they're suffering. That young man triggered that emotional response in me as a clue to help guide me along my journey.
So, if you know what you want to do, what's happening is that you're suffering from trying to figure out the "how" before you've actually done the internal work. So, let' say for example that you realize you want to open up your own yoga studio, or you want to be a coach, or you want to start a non-profit. But, over here, you're a vice president of sales, or you're a successful professional -- whatever it is that you're doing. What's happening is that you're trying to figure out the how before you're really entitled to the "how" because you have to make the commitment first. I've spoken about this in other videos that I've put together. You have to say, "I don't know how. I don't when. But, I know that soon I'm going to transition into working for this non-profit full time. I know that I'm going to create and open up this yoga studio. I know that I'm going to be a successful coach." You have to commit to the decision. You have to commit to the decision and you have to allow yourself to envision what it would like because, in the envisioning, that's when you get the brain change that's going to reveal the "how" to you. It's going to three things that I've mentioned before. You're going to attract new ideas on how you could leave this job over here despite all of the mind's constraints and the mind's limitations about the income, and the safety, and the security, and all the responsibilities you have, and how there's no way you can see you can transition over here. If you allow yourself to make the decision, and you start to indulge in the visualization in the future experience of it, you'll start to get the idea that will lead you from here to there. You'll literally change your perception of the reality around you, so you'll see opportunities that never existed before -- financing opportunities, partnership opportunities, and you will start to activate the power of coincidence. What's key is that you start to ask empowered questions.
I ran into a woman who pulled me off on the street like the Dream Whisperer. I was carrying a book under my arm, and she noticed the book, and she said, "Maybe you can help me with the problem I'm having." I said, "Well, what's the problem you're having?" She said, "Well, I've got this dream, but I don't know how to do it." I said, "Well, what's your dream?" She said, "Well, I'm a schoolteacher. I work in a traditional school system, but I like alternative education and I want to create a charter school in a treehouse." And I’m down for anything. I said, "Listen, that's an incredible idea. I love it." I said, "What's the problem?" She said, "I don't have the money." So, she was so focused on the fact that she didn't have the money that, when I finally got her to pay attention to what I was asking and I said, "How much money do you need?", she said, "I don't know." So, if you don't know how much money you need, how are you possibly going to attract the right ideas to create the finances that you need to execute on this vision? So, you have to be conscious of what you're putting your attention on. You have to be conscious of the questions that you're asking yourself.
So, that in essence is the formula for stepping from what you've been doing in a job or a career into a mission, and a passion, and a purpose in your life. If there's one thing I could recommend to you, it's to be patient because, even if you implement all of these suggestions I have, even you asked for guidance from whomever your guidance is, whether it's God or the universe or nature or some sort of intelligence or Allah, even if you're asking and even if you are making the decision that you're going to have this happen for you, and even as you start to get the ideas and see the opportunities, it may take a little bit of time. The biggest mistake that we make is that, in that time, in the not happening of it immediately, we go back to the old decision, which is I'm just going to stay where I'm at. So, you have to be vigilant about sticking to your commitment that either you will know what your passion and your purpose is or you will find a way to step into your passion, and your purpose, and your mission even though it's going to take a little bit of time.
So, I hope that's been helpful for you. It has been transformational in my life and, as you know, I’m committed to helping you live a passion, purpose, mission-driven life because, frankly, if you can do that, everything else that you want comes along with it. I truly believe that that's what we were designed to do. It's just that we need to step through the fear and the figuring out of the how. Some of the things that I've just explained to you can help you do that.
So, many, many blessings. If you haven't had a chance yet, subscribe to my YouTube channel. Come over to Facebook.com. I don't know why it's over there, but check us out there. We're always doing interesting things on Facebook. If you haven't had a chance yet, subscribe to my newsletter. It's where I release some exclusive trainings that you don't want to miss. So, anyway, many blessings. Claim your power. Live your purpose. Love your life. I will see you in the next video.
How to Be More Accepting, Forgiving and Compassionate
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer. Welcome and thank you so much for being here today. Today, I want to speak to you about three qualities that we would all like to cultivate more. I want to speak to you about acceptance, I want to speak to you about forgiveness, and I want to speak to you about compassion -- the three sisters of living an extraordinary life. So, these qualities are something that inherently we all know that we should have, that we should be cultivating, that we should be showing up in life expressing ourselves in this way. When somebody wrongs you, you should be forgiving. When somebody upsets you, you should be compassionate. But, we don't exactly always do that, do we? There's something funny about human beings, and I've seen this now that I've had the opportunity to speak to thousands of people, where there's something subconscious that goes on where we say, "Yeah, okay, I get I should be compassionate. I get I should be forgiving. I get I should be accepting. But, what's in it for me?"
Well, as if feeling good is not enough, I will tell you what's in it for you so that you can start to become convinced that this is something you should be doing more and, of course, I'll give you the "how" of doing it. But, what we're learning is that every time we are feeling guilty, every time we're resentful, every time we're judgmental, the brain is active. So, there are actually aspects of our neurosynaptic connections that become active every time we experience those things -- guilt, resentment, judgment. And, so, essentially what's happening when we're doing that is we're dissipating our creative energy. There's this old saying of something like resentment or judgment is like putting poison in someone else's food and then eating it yourself, or something like that. I can't remember what the old adage is. But, the idea is that you're self-sabotaging. You are literally dissipating your creative energy. So, if you think about your creative energy as the key or the bloodline to creating whatever it is that you want in your life, what you're doing is you're pulling away from your own creation. So, every time you're feeling resentful, every time you're feeling judgmental, what you're actually doing is you're preventing yourself from creating what it is that you want to create because, remember, creation is a matter of putting your consistent, focused attention on your desired outcome. So, anything that's pulling you away from that is preventing you from creating. So, when we start becoming resentful over what somebody has done to us, or we become judgmental about the way that somebody is, or we refuse to have forgiveness for somebody or for ourselves and so maybe we feel guilty, what we're doing is we're dissipating our creative energy. We're dissipating our mental energy because we can actually see how certain parts of the brain light up when we're in these states.
So, we're also seeing that by moving over to the other side of the fence, by forgiving, by accepting, by having compassion, we actually see a change in the brain where we move into an alpha brainwave state. So, there are these various states of brain activity and alpha is what gives us access to creativity, intuition, and inspiration. It's not so much that by having compassion and by having acceptance and by having forgiveness that we move into these states, it's that that's the default state that exists when we're not dissipating our creative energy, our mental energy, on resentment, judgment, and feeling guilty.
So, how do we do that? If we're convinced that living in a compassionate state, and living in a forgiving state, and living in an accepting state is the best for our own creation, it's the key to creating to what we want in our own lives, how do we do it when we're in the face of opposition? How do we do it when we're at work and we're in a business meeting and somebody really pisses us off? How do we do it when we feel like we've been wronged by our boss, or by our partner, or life isn't going the way that we expect it to? Well, I always go back to the universal creative laws. It's like going back to gravity. If you believe like I do, and I'm trying to convince you that life is always working for you, that experience that you're having where you're reacting to it in a judgmental way, where it's creating resentment in you, where you're feeling guilty or ashamed of whatever it is, that moment is actually a blessing because, if you get really, really aware, if you become quiet, you become attentive to your own mind, you'll see that you're having certain thoughts and reaction to that experience. So, your boyfriend, or your girlfriend, or your husband, or your wife might piss you off and you say, "You know what? I knew that relationships never work out." Or, "I can't trust men or women." Or, "I need to do it all on my own." It's in that moment that that person, through your experience with them, is giving you tremendous insight into what you already believe because it's what you already believe or, as I like to say, what you decided, the rules, the contracts that you've made about everything in your life that manufactures your experience. So, you and this situation have been brought together to reveal something to you about yourself. It's a revelatory moment if you're present for it. But, we can't be present for it if we're being resentful, if we're being judgmental, and if we're not being accepting of the situation.
So, what's important is that every time you feel like someone wrongs you, or every time somebody pisses you off, or a situation upsets you, you say, "What is it that's in this situation that it's telling me about me? What is it about my reaction that is important for me to understand? What is it that's inside of me that's creating this situation?" When you realize that, when you say, "Oh my God, I never realized it. I always expected things to work out badly for me, or I believed other people always had the good luck, or in the situation over here where I feel like somebody's wronged me financially that I always believed that money comes but it never stays, or that you can't trust people in money situations," the moment that you realize that and you realize that this person or this situation is creating this environment for your own self-revelation, it's very easy to switch into compassion. It's very easy to switch into acceptance. It's very easy to switch into forgiveness. But, you have to get clued in to the fact and really buy into the fact that every experience is of your own making. You truly are responsible. You have the ability to respond to every situation in your life. Your response can either be something that dissipates your creative energy and perpetuates the types of experiences that you don't enjoy or your response could be a deep, deep, honest self-awareness of the fact that you've been believing this thing for a very long time, which is your reaction, and it's manufactured your experience. In that space, you can make a new decision. You can create a new belief. You can have compassion, forgiveness, and acceptance for anything that's going on.
So, I hope that's been helpful for you. It's been tremendously helpful for me. I haven't always been a person who has been peaceful, compassionate, forgiving, accepting, but I've realized that this benefits me tremendously in my life and so I've made a concerted effort in my day-to-day experiences to try to see how life is working for me and not against me. It's served me tremendously well.
So, if you haven't had a chance yet and you've enjoyed this video, why not subscribe below? How many times do I have to ask you to do this? I do my best to provide you with interesting, compelling, and transformational content on a daily and weekly basis. If you haven't had a chance yet, come over to FB.com, check out my Facebook page, like me there. And, if you get a chance, come over to DavidBayer.com. Subscribe to my newsletter. I always release unique trainings to everybody on my list.
So, many, many blessings. Claim your power. Live your purpose. Love your life. I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer. Thank you so much for being here with me. First today, I just want to really acknowledge you because I know, if you're watching this video, it's probably not the first video of mine that you've watched and you're on this journey of continuing to develop, and transform, and cultivate who you are so that you can create an extraordinary life. It's my commitment, as always, to support you in that. And so, today, I want to give you one of those nuanced distinctions. It's one of those things that's going to come up for you on your journey. It's going to cause you to think, "What the heck is going on with me today? What do I do? Am I falling back into my old patterns? Am I slipping back out of my own personal development? Am I back where I started?" The answer is, no, you're not. It's just part of the process. But, I want to talk about those days where you feel incongruent with the incredible things that are going on with your life. In other words, life is going great. Work is going great or your business is going great. Relationships are going well. You're doing well. You're in a regular routine that you're proud of. You're showing up in life the way that you want to be showing up, but somehow it doesn't feel good. You feel kind of -- I guess the way we would describe it is, blah, right?
I have a friend who called me with this the other day. He said, "I don’t know what's going on. Everything is amazing, but I'm feeling blah and now I'm finding myself getting irritable like I used to get irritable. I'm judging people like I used to judge people. Those old thoughts of I'm not good enough, and am I doing enough, and is it ever going to happen for me and comparing myself to the other people are coming back." He said, "I feel like I'm back at square one." So, you're not back at square one. One of the interesting things about personal, or spiritual, or psychological development is that it's cyclical. It's like seasons. But, the reality is that you're growing like this. You're growing in an upward spiral. Oftentimes, you hit the same part of the spiral that you were at when you were at a lower level and it feels very similar. But, there are new distinctions that are happening. So, this is actually a really great place to be in, when you're feeling blah, and I want to explain to you what happens with most people with this experience.
So, what happens is uncertainty has crept back into your life. There was a period of time where you were feeling very, very certain. You were certain about yourself. You were certain about the direction you were going in with your passion and your purpose. You were certain about your relationships. You were certain about your business. And uncertainty has crept back in, and the mind cannot tolerate uncertainty. What's so interesting about these times when we just feel blah, when we feel incongruent with the greatness of the life that is around us, is that there's not one big, bodacious problem that's staring at us. In fact, that'd be a lot easier to deal with. We could just apply all of our tools to that problem. We could say, "I know [audio gap] working for me, not against me. What is it that's inside of me that's created this thing? What kind of new decisions do I want to make now that I've experienced this contrast in my life of this thing that doesn't feel very good?" We could deal with that one thing. But, what's happened is there have been a bunch of tiny, little things that have crept back into your life and you haven't realized it.
So, what we need to do is we need to start to chunk it down. I'm going to give you an example. Let's say, for example, you were baking bread. So, you had a big bowl of dough and I came and I sprinkled a little bit of cayenne pepper in. That's the uncertainty. You could bake your bread and you probably wouldn't notice. But, if I sprinkled enough cayenne pepper into your bread, you'd have a spicy sourdough and it wouldn't taste very good. That's what's happened to your life. There's been enough uncertainty that's been sprinkled in just under the radar that you're getting indigestion with your own life. So, they key is for you to stop. Stop everything because the tendency is going to be to try to do more to make up for this not feeling enough. Stop everything and really look at it and say, "What's the number one thing that's causing me distress in my life right now?" and identify it. Look at that and do the work around it. Say, "Okay, this thing is happening over here. I've got some beliefs that are showing up around this thing. Is that true? I'm making this mean something about myself or about other people. I'm being resentful. I'm not having compassion here. I'm not having gratitude." Do your work around that one thing and then look at the next thing. Say, "What's the next thing that's causing a little bit of discomfort in my life?"
I find it very, very helpful to actually outline out all of the things that are causing me discomfort, which ultimately means all the things that are creating uncertainty in my life, all the things that are creating fear, and to just sort of tackle each one at a time. You can do this in 15 to 20 minutes. What's happening, when you do this, is that you're taking this discomfort that's operating at the subconscious level and you're making it conscious. You're able to work with it. You're able to deal with it. It's like, once you see it, it's not that big of a problem. The problem is when you can't see it. It's like getting into a boxing ring and fighting an invisible boxer. You simply can't win.
So, what you need to do is you need to chunk it all it down. Then, I suggest you go back to some self-acknowledgement. Self-acknowledgement, self-esteem, gratitude -- appreciate all the things that you're accomplishing in your life. Realize you're not falling back into old patterns. You're moving on to a new level and just appreciate the fact that you're doing this work that's so few people do. We all get so attached to the outcomes of our life and, as you've probably seen in other videos, I encourage you to focus on the process because you can't control the outcomes. But, you can control how you show up in life. So, take a moment to just appreciate the fact that you're doing this work, that you're on this journey, that you're on this path, that you're in this conversation because, frankly, you're in the top 1%, 2%, 3% of people who are doing the most important work you could possibly be doing. If you do that, if you chunk it down, if you do your work around each of those individual components, if you have a little bit of self-acknowledgement, self-esteem, and gratitude, I guarantee you can shift your state like that. You'll be back into living in congruence with the incredible life you've created around you.
So, I hope that's been helpful for you today. As always, I suggest you subscribe to my YouTube channel. If you haven't had a chance yet, come over to Facebook.com. We're always doing really cool things there. And check out DavidBayer.com. If you're not on my list, subscribe because that's the place where I release unique trainings from time to time, which I don't release anywhere else.
So, many, many blessings. Claim your power. Live your purpose. Love your life. I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer, and I want to thank you so much for being here today. Today, I want to talk to you about an age-old paradox. It's this idea that we should be unattached to our outcomes, that somehow we should be okay when the stuff that we really, really want doesn’t happen. Buddha talks about it. All the eastern teachings talk about it. They talk about how life is suffering unless somehow you can be unattached to the outcomes of it. But, at the same time, you look at the creative principles. You look at something like Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, or The New Thought Movement, or The Science of Mind Movement and they were very, very clear that you have to know what you want. You have to know what you want, you have to have a burning desire for it, and you have to take massive action towards it if you want to bring it into the world.
So, how do we reconcile these two ideas? How do we put everything that we've got in an effort towards what we want to create or who we want to be in the world, but at the same time, if it doesn't work out the way that we want it to, despite the fact that we've put all of our blood, and sweat, and tears into it, we're okay with it?
Well, the answer is to focus on the process, and here's what I mean. Yes, it's very important for you to have clarity on what you want. Clarity enrolls the brain. If you've watched any of my videos, if you've been involved in any of my work, you know that central to this conversation around science, and spirituality, and psychology is the brain. So, every time we know what we want, the brain actually imagines it. We build new neurosynaptic connections that support attracting the ideas, seeing the opportunities in front of us, and activating the power of coincidence. The problem is that, when we know what we want and we're taking massive action towards it, we get attached to it. Then, the mind starts to say, "Well, what if it doesn't happen? What if I'm making the wrong decision? This isn't going the way that I expected?" And, ultimately, that resistance is dissipating our mental energy. It's dissipating our creative energy because, if creating what we want in the world is a matter of putting our consistent, concentrated, focused attention on its outcome, anything other than that is distracting us from creating. So, all of the worry, all of the doubt, all of the fear, and all of the indecision is sapping your creative potential. It's literally slowing down your process of creating whatever you want in the world. So, what do we do to deal with that?
Well, what we essentially do is we focus on the process. So, once you know what you want, you're going to start to get ideas and it's your job to start to take action around those ideas. But, from there, the outcome is not up to you. All that's up to you is whether or not you execute on the plan that you came up with. Now, that may sound easy, but it's really not because doubt, and fear, and worry, and overwhelm prevent people like you and me from actually executing on the action plans that we start to construct. It's not that people don't know what to do and they fail. It's that they don't execute on what they know they should be doing.
So, when you start looking at whether or not you are successful in any endeavor in your life, you can't base your success on the results. You can't base your success on the outcome because you can't control that. Set yourself up for success by defining success as whether or not you actually execute on your plan. Focus on the process rather than the outcome. I'll give you a quick example. I was running around the lake the other day outside of my house and, as I was running, I saw a little baby toy on the ground. I noticed about a half a mile back I had passed two women who were pushing strollers with babies in the carriage. As I was running by the baby toy, I thought to myself this is a moment where I decide who I want to be. Do I want to be the guy who runs by the baby toy and comes up with some excuse or some assumption that it's not their baby toy? Or, do I want to be the guy who grabs the toy, runs the half mile back, and gives them the toy despite the fact that I'm not quite sure whether or not it was theirs? So, I said, "That's an easy decision. I want to be the guy who runs back." So, I grabbed the toy. I ran the half mile back. I approached the two women and I said, "Is this your baby toy that you dropped a half a mile in the other direction?" Their answer was, "No." But, for me, that was a success, not because it was their toy, but because I executed on the plan. I followed the process that was important to me. Does that make sense?
All you need to do is have clarity and know what you want. From there, you follow your action plan. You focus on the process and, in that way, you can become completely unattached to the outcome. You can trust that, if you do this time and time again, even though we may not get what we want in the end, there is this infinite intelligence that is ultimately guiding us to our best purpose, our best results, our highest abundance, and that force is in action, and that as long as you follow your process, you'll ultimately create the life that you want to live.
I hope this has been helpful for you. It is a paradox that had been troubling me for years on how I could be unattached, but still have massive desire for what I what I want in the world. The answer, as I mentioned, is focus on the process.
Many, many blessings. If you haven't had a chance yet, subscribe to my YouTube channel, would you? Come on and join us over at Facebook or head over to DavidBayer.com and subscribe to my newsletter. I'm always providing unique trainings and information through my newsletter list. So, many, many blessings. Have an incredible, incredible day and I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and thank you so much for joining me here today. I often get the phone call when the crisis has hit, and we’ve all been in those experiences in our life that we might have called a crisis, where there was just an overwhelmingly amount of uncertainty in our life, and that’s exactly what a crisis is. The reason why a crisis feels so extraordinarily painful is that the brain cannot handle uncertainty. So, it might be uncertainty in your relationship world when your partner walks in and, all of a sudden, breaks up with you. It might be uncertainty in your financial world when, all of a sudden, you realize your bankrupt is in the negative. It might be uncertainty in your career or your job world when, all of a sudden, you get the notice that you’ve been terminated. There are areas of our life – health is another great example, where something happens that creates massive uncertainty and, therefore, massive pain.
So, I want to talk to you a little bit about what I do to help people get through crisis and how I bring them back down because, ultimately, the crisis is in the mind. It’s oftentimes not in the reality of the situation, but the overwhelming amount of uncertainty puts the brain, puts the mind, in a certain position that it becomes very, very difficult to have any type of clarity. So, what do we do? Well, there’s three things that we can do in a crisis to sort of reclaim our power, reclaim our stability, and navigate through the crisis in a way that’s a little less painful and a little bit more productive because, let’s face it, we’ve all had these crisis moments and, even though we forget it when in the middle of the next crisis, it’s always worked out for us.
>So, the first thing that we need to do is we need to level up our certainty. If we’re in a state of uncertainty, we have to find certainty in something. So, for myself, I go back the universal creative principles. I literally go back to what I’ve come to understand about life and that is, whatever I’m experiencing here, I don’t know how in the moment, but it’s working for me. Sometimes, it’s the most tragic of moments, but I know that I’m going to learn something from this and, ultimately, I’m going to get through it and come out the other side okay. Or, I know that life is always working for me, not against me. So, there’s a divine guiding hand that I can always look to, that’s always guided me through my difficult situations, be it financial, relationship, health, or in business and, again, I’ve always been okay. I can also become curious about the situation and say, “If I know that I’m fully responsible for my life and I’m here staring at this overwhelming amount of uncertainty, which I’m calling a crisis, what in this did I create so that I can take something from this experience, transform my inner world, and affect my outer world in my future reality?” So, what can you do to get certainty around this area of your life that you’re calling a crisis?
The second thing that you can do is you can chunk it down because, when the brain goes on high alert, when it goes right into survival mode, all of a sudden everything seems like one big wall of problem. So, what can you do chunk it down and take it piece-by-piece? So, for example, I had a client call me recently and it was very clear that he had an immediate business issue. So, we said, “Well, you need to make payroll by Thursday. What can we do to make payroll by Thursday?” He said, “Well, payroll by Thursday doesn’t solve Friday’s problem.” I said, “I know, but Thursday comes before Friday, so we’re going to solve Thursday’s problem first.” If you’ve ever seen the movie, Apollo 13, this is a great example of being in a crisis situation and one at a time chunking it down and dealing with the next issue. That’s what we need to do when we’re in the middle of a crisis. We have to pull all the pieces apart, put them in priority of importance, or chronologically, and just deal with the next thing that we need to deal with. We don’t have to solve all of the problems at once.
That really takes me to the third thing, which is find the big wins in the fact that you’re making decisions. My client said to me, “Listen, I’m taking action. I’m making decisions. But, it’s not solving the problem. The nightmare still isn’t ending.” I said, “Well, the nightmare will end, but what we want to focus on right now is not solving the overall problem. What we want to do is we want to re-energize by taking solace in the fact that we’re making decisions. We’re making progress. Inch-by-inch we’re moving down the field and, eventually, we will get to the other end zone, which is the end of this crisis.”
So, I hope that’s been helpful for you. I know we all get into these states where we get overwhelmed by uncertainty. But, if you can find a way to establish another level of certainty in your life and, ultimately, if you can chunk it down so you can start dealing with each of these individual issues that are part of the bigger problem, and you can focus not on resolving the entire issue, but focus on the little wins, you’ll get through the crisis unscathed. And, let me remind you, you always have and you always will.
I hope this has been helpful for you. If you haven’t subscribed to my YouTube channel, why not do that now? And, if you’d love to, come on over to Facebook. We’re always having interesting conversations there. Check out DavidBayer.com and subscribe to my newsletter because I would love to stay in this conversation with you about claiming your power, living your purpose, and loving your life. I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and thank you so much for being here today. Today, I want to share with you a very, very, very important distinction that can transform your life. If you’re like me, for many, many years, I thought I needed to accomplish something to prove who I was. The only way that I could really justify who I envisioned myself to be, who I knew I was capable of becoming, was through what I created into the world. So, I was always chasing creation. I was always chasing – needing to do something, whether it was a certain level of contribution, or a certain level of wealth creation, or a certain status, or a certain number of Facebook fans, or subscribers, or whatever it was to know that I had made it, to know that I had fulfilled my potential. I think for people who are in this journey, who are becoming enlightened, all of a sudden they tap into this idea of having a passion and a purpose, and they understand that anything is possible, and so you want to fulfil your potential. I get that.
But, the way that you fulfill your potential is not by creating something. It’s not by proving to yourself who you are through the results of your efforts. It’s actually just knowing it inside of you. It’s a two millimeter distinction that, once you are clear on who you are and you have self-esteem for yourself regardless of what you’ve created, creation pours out of you. The types of coincidences, and miracles, and experiences that I started to have the moment I got clear that I was okay no matter what I created in the world was extraordinary. What happens, it’s a two millimeter distinction that you sort of feel your way through, but it’s a 180 degree difference. So, you no longer chase creating things or chase success or accomplishment because you needed to feel good about yourself, but every day you feel so good about yourself that success just happens.
So, the question is, how do you make this shift? How do you make this shift from this voice in your head, which is constantly telling you you’re not good enough, you’re not doing enough, and it’s fighting against that authentic part of your that’s inspired to go out into the world because every time you get inspired to do something, it’s saying, “Watch out. You might make a mistake. You might do it wrong.” Or, “You did it, but you didn’t do it well enough.” There’s this internal conflict. So, what’s important is that you start to get involved in this internal conflict, in this internal dialogue.
That voice in your head is a treasure trove of information about what you really believe. That is the voice of your subconscious mind. It is the voice of all of your limiting beliefs and all of your fears. So, if you can start to become more self-aware by getting into a regular meditation practice, exercising regularly, which puts the mind on the exercise and allows you to start becoming more conscious of what’s going on, or even doing things that are creative expressions – for you, it might be walking in nature – and starting to document what it is that this internal voice is saying, and then questioning it and really looking at it and saying, “Is this true?” And knowing that you have the opportunity to make a different decision about how you want to view the world, that you don’t have to just live according to the voice of your past, to this very small part of you that is very scared and afraid.
So, the shift is about really going inside and becoming aware of the fact that you’ve been driven by programs, and seeing that those programs are not real, and making new decisions over time. Now, it takes a little bit of time because what essentially you’re doing is you’re re-wiring your brain. You’re becoming a different person. But, as you do this work, the brain will slowly start to recalibrate with you and, eventually, this work happens faster, and faster, and faster. Then, one day you wake up and it’s really quite profound. You no longer need external circumstances to justify who you are. But, the irony of course is that what you’re creating externally is far greater than you ever could have possibly imagined.
So, I know that was a little bit esoteric, but it’s true. I hope it’s been helpful for you. If you love this video, subscribe. Comment below. Ask me any questions. I try to answer them all personally. Hop on over to DavidBayer.com. Join our newsletter. Really, stay involved with the conversation. Why wouldn’t you? This is incredible. Who’s talking about this? And, if you’re on the FB, join me on Facebook. We do some pretty cool stuff over there to.
So, many blessings. Thank you for having a serious conversation, which is a little bit unusual for me, but I think it’s pretty powerful and I think it’s important. So, many blessings. Live life powerfully and I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and thank you so much for being here today. Today, I wanted to talk to you about the best thing about failure. When you start to live your life and you realize that life is always working for you, when you become enlightened and you start to see problems as opportunities, you really start to change your perspective on failure. So, I want to talk to you about the best thing about “failure” and why failure really isn’t failure.
Number one, any time we experience something that doesn’t go the way we expect it to, we determine that it’s a failure. It’s not really a failure. It’s an experience that we’re having where life has determined that it should go otherwise. The only time that we really suffer is when we expect life to be other than what it really is, which is really insane. So, as life is happening, and it’s happening all around us, it’s important to understand that one of four things is always happening when your expectations are not met.
The first thing that might be happening is that you are learning. You are learning from an experience and you’re going to be taking this learning with you in the future so that you’re going to be able to accomplish something that you’re not already equipped to accomplish today, right? We can look back on our life and we can see so many times that things didn’t go the way that we expected them to. We ended up learning something through the experience or the “failure.” And, that thing was critical in our moving forward in our mission, or our goals, or whatever it is that we were trying to accomplish in our life. So, the first thing is that you’re learning.
The second thing is that you’re being redirected. So, there is a guiding force in life. You could call it universe, spirit, God, Allah, whatever you want to call it, but it is guiding us towards our best outcomes. So, oftentimes, we think we know better than it, which is a little bit silly since it is infinite intelligence and we are just sort of localized intelligence. But, it knows better than us. So, oftentimes, we’re being redirected through an experience to another experience that would serve us better. I remember one point in time when I had my online marketing company, which I actually still have, but when I was managing it, one of my developers decided to leave. I thought that this was a tremendous tragedy that was taking place, but what really was happening was I was being redirected to automate my business, which is actually what my intention was, and by him leaving, I was forced to explore other options and I now outsource all my development to a third-party company. So, everything that was actually happening was in alignment with what I wanted, I just wasn’t clear that that’s what was going on. So, you’re being redirected.
The third thing, which is similar but really, really cool, is that you’re being set up. So, there is a higher, more intelligent part of you that exists outside of you. It exists outside of your localized expression of the divine intelligence into the world, which you call “you.” So, that other part of you, which is still somewhere in the unseen world, knows exactly what it is that you’re going to do even though you don’t know that you’re going to do it yet. It knows what you want before you know what you want. So, it is consistently setting you up with experiences that you’re going to need to have so that two years down the road, five years down the road, ten years down the road you meet the right people who you need to meet, you are geographically located wherever you need to be geographically located, you’re in the right job position for the thing that needs to happen, and you’ve met the right person who you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. You’re being set up. Sometimes, we run into the set up, and we don’t realize it’s a set up. In fact, it just looks like a breakdown. But, it’s not a breakdown, it’s a set up. And, if you can start to realize that you simply don’t have the perspective yet to appreciate the set up, then you can handle the present moment circumstance which you think is a failure a little bit better because, remember, life is always working for you.
The fourth thing is that there’s something you need to learn about what’s inside of you and life is showing up to reflect that back to you. There’s something that you need to clear out and heal inside of you that is creating or manifesting the experience that you’re experiencing. So, the moment you experience this thing is the moment that thoughts start to occur for you. Like, “Oh my God, I can’t trust people. I knew it. People always let me down. God, money is so hard to make.” Whatever is being triggered is something you need to look at and shift because it’s preventing you from ultimately having the life that you want. So, it’s the moment that what is inside of you is being reflected. It’s kind of like a search engine. You’re getting a search result and it’s helping you understand the search query that you’ve been putting in that’s not congruent with what you want to accomplish in your life.
So, those are the four wonderful, incredible, extraordinary opportunities that come out of failure. You’re learning something, you’re being redirected, you’re being set up, or you’re being shown something about yourself that’s on the inside that’s just manifesting on the outside that you’ve got to take care of.
So, I hope that’s been helpful for you. Subscribe to my YouTube channel. This is incredible content. Come on over to DavidBayer.com. Sign up for our newsletter. Get involved in the conversation. Comment below. I review all the comments personally. And join us on our Facebook page, would you? I hope you have an incredible day. Live life powerfully and make it happen.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and today I want to talk to you about how special you are. You are so extraordinarily special, and you don’t even know it, and I want to explain to you why. This is not just blowing smoke up your special butt. This is really truly explaining to you why you, and not just you, but why we are all so critical to the system of life. So often, we get caught up in this idea that we can be special if we go out and accomplish special things. But, no, we are inherently special just by coming into this world and there’s two reasons why. I’m going to explain them to you.
So, the first thing is that there are other people in the world who have problems. Oftentimes, they’re suffering. In their suffering, they start to ask for answers, right? You might look at it as prayer, or they may not even know that they’re asking, but they just want their problems to be solved. These problems go up into this collective of this universal intelligence. These problems then transform into ideas or solutions, and these ideas and solutions are looking for outlets into the world. And you, my friend, are an outlet for that idea or solution that solves someone else’s problem to come into the world.
The problem is that, most of the time, we’re not paying attention to the ideas because we’re focused so much on the fact that we don’t think we’re special because we’re not out there doing things that we think make us special. But, you are inherently special. If you would just stop worrying about having to prove how special you are, you could start paying attention to the ideas that are looking to come into the world through you because they like you, because you’re worthy, because you’re capable. So many people I know are running around looking for their purpose, and they’re so busy looking for their purpose, and their purpose is knocking them on the head saying, “Listen, dude, I’m the idea that you’re supposed to bring into the world, but you’re so busy looking around out there you don’t even notice I’m here.” So, you are critically important because ideas are trying to find their way into the world through you as their deliverer.
Now, the second thing is that you’re having experiences. So, you’re out there having experiences as you’re collecting data through your five senses and, arguably, this sixth sense, another data collector. You’re providing the information, again, up into this collective. So, as you do that, you are facilitating other people’s ideas. You’re collecting information. You’re having experiences. They may not be things that you need to act on, but you’re providing information up into the system that improves the world. So, just by you being, you are critically important. That’s part of why you should have self-esteem, esteem for yourself, no matter where you are in your life, or what you’ve accomplished, or what you job title is, or how much money you have. You’re an integral, critical part of the system. If you can start living each day with the knowingness that you are an integral, critical part of the system and living with that self-esteem, you will eventually pour forth things into the world that you would normally determine as being special. Okay?
So, I just want you to know today how special you are. You are a critical part of this system, and we need you, and we need you because you are about to give birth to incredible ideas if you would just stop worrying about the fact that you think you’re not special. Does that make sense? I hope this helps.
I’d love for you to subscribe to my YouTube channel and comment below with any of your questions or comments. Come on over to DavidBayer.com and subscribe to my newsletter. Why not get involved in the conversation? And hit up Facebook. We do a ton of cool stuff over there too.
Anyway, I hope you’ve enjoyed this. Live life powerfully. Have an amazing day. Go out and be special. Start paying attention to your ideas. I’ll talk to you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer. Thank you for being here. Just a quick five minutes to kickstart, or jumpstart, or end your day with a little bit of inspiration. We get so many amazing emails, and questions, and comments to DavidBayer.com and also to our Facebook page. I received one of those amazing questions this morning, which was from someone named Suzanne. Suzanne is, I think, a newer member of our tribe based on the question she asked, but it was such a good question I wanted to address it here today. So, Suzanne asked, “David, what is spirituality? Why is spirituality important and how can I live a more spiritual life?” Amazing question, Suzanne, and I want to be able to answer that for you.
So, here’s what I believe spirituality is. What I believe spirituality is, is it’s the act or condition of being in spirit, of being inspired, and all the emotions that come along with an inspired state. So, that could be gratitude, appreciation, joy, compassion, courage, curiosity. It’s all in the states that we really enjoy being in that lead to productive results in our life. And, I can tell you what spiritual is not, and it is not about being in your limiting beliefs about how you’re not good enough, or how you’re not doing enough, or how there’s not enough time or money, or the stories that you have about why you can’t have what you really want in your life, like there’s no good men or women out there, or there’s no way I could transition from the job I have into something I’d really love doing. Those types of states, those types of beliefs, lead to an emotion that doesn’t feel good, right? It leads to anxiety about the future. It leads to guilt about the past. It leads to overwhelm about your life. Not feeling like you’re good enough. So, that’s not living a spiritual moment. So, it’s not when you’re in the voice in your head.
What’s so important about living a spiritual life, which again is not a destination, it’s a moment-by-moment choice of what you want to focus on and whether or not you choose to live in a beautiful state. But why it’s so important is because that’s the state that gives you access to infinite intelligence. It’s what gives you access to your higher self. It’s what gives you access to the bigger, smarter part of you that knows why you’re here and what you really want to do, even though you may not be clear on it yet, and it guides you towards that destiny. So, I call it the voice of your destiny. It’s that little part of you that says, “Come on. We can do this. Let’s try this. There’s this new thing.” And then, of course, the mind pulls you back with all of the stories and all of the limiting beliefs in that voice in your head of all the reasons why you need to remain just right where you are continuing to do the same routine day in and day out because it’s designed to help you survive not to thrive. It’s focused on safety and security. But, the challenge, of course, is that everything that we want is in the unknown. It’s in the uncertainty. It’s in the space of infinite possibility that we don’t know about yet.
So, when you can live a spiritual life, when you can be in that inspired moment, you’ll be properly guided into the unknown and you’ll be guided to that next stage of your life, to that next relationship, to that next level of income, to that next job that you love doing even more, to starting your own business. Whatever it is, that’s what will guide you there and that’s why it’s so important.
Practically speaking, and many of you know this is a big part of my work, what happens when you do that in the moment is you change your brain. So, when you notice that the voice in your head is telling you you can’t do something or you notice the limiting belief, and you see it for what it is, just a mechanism of the brain or a mechanism of the mind, and you choose to make a new decision in that moment, to believe something differently, the brain doesn’t know the difference and you actually experience that new decision. You actually experience that next level of income. You actually experience the possibility of that relationship. You actually experience going on that trip that you imagined going on instead of living in all the reasons of why it can’t happen. And, when you do that, you change your brain. We actually see that the neurosynaptic connections of your brain change whenever, in the moment, you choose to make a spiritual choice.
So, what you do over time is you recondition yourself to rewire all of your old patterns so you can become an effective instrument of spirit, so that you can be fully self-expressed in the world through your own DNA coding and whatever the creator designed you to do in this life and for you to fulfill on that. That’s why spirituality is so important. I call spirituality the most important technology that we have available. It’s just that, a lot of times, we don’t talk about this because spirituality gets rubbed up against religion and it’s a very touchy subject. But, it’s important that we start really understanding what it is that we’re talking about so that we can understand how to live that way and why it’s important.
So, I hope this has been helpful for you today. Many, many blessings. If you haven’t had a chance yet, stop on over to DavidBayer.com. Subscribe to our newsletter. Join our tribe. Hit up our Facebook page. Like the page. Get involved in the conversation because we are always having really inspired, empowering, and intelligent conversations about what we can do to reclaim our power, live our purpose, and love our life.
So, I hope this has been helpful for you. Look forward to seeing you in the next video. Have a powerful day and I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer. Thank you for stopping in today for a little dose of inspiration, intelligence, and wisdom about how to get unstuck in our lives and how to create the life we love. How do we reclaim this power that we have access to, love our life, and live our purpose? That’s what we’re always talking about at DavidBayer.com. Today, I wanted to talk to you about the number one thing that people come to me for, whether it’s in my private practice, or in my group coaching programs, or my live events, and that’s because they feel stuck.
So, most people don’t come because they want to live their dreams. They come because of a problem. But, problems and dreams sit on the same spectrum. So, the reason why we’re stuck is because we’ve got this thing over here that we want – this goal, this dream, this thing in our life – and the “stuck” is preventing us from accomplishing it. Sometimes, we’re stuck around our life purpose, and really finding what it is that we’re here to do, and how we can serve in our life in a greater way, and sort of combine our work, and our passion, and our life all into one. But, sometimes, we’re stuck on little things, like wanting to lose 20 pounds, or wanting to be in a relationship, or wanting to get out of a relationship.
What’s important is to really start to understand what this “stuck” is. As I always say, “If we don’t understand what it is, there’s no way that we can actually find a solution for it.” And it turns out that stuck is a great place to be. The reason why stuck is a great place to be is because the discomfort of not accomplishing this thing, or creating this thing, or being the way that you want to be over here in your dreams has become so intense that you’re forced to do something about it. Now, you can do one of two things. You can actually create a breakthrough, which is what I’m going to talk to you about today, or you can soothe yourself. You could become addicted to worrying.
You could become addicted to complaining. You could become addicted to alcohol. You could become addicted to drugs. You could obsessively check your social media. You could use food in order to soothe yourself. So, in one way, shape, or form, you’re going to do something. The question is, are you going to do something that’s going to move you towards creating the life that you dream of living or you going to do something that continues to perpetuate the stuck feeling and gives you temporary relief.
So, what is “stuck?” Stuck is the experience of this internal dialogue that you’re not currently aware of, and it’s a dialogue between two voices. One voice is the voice of your destiny. It’s the higher part of you, the infinite intelligent part of you, your authentic self, and it really knows what it is you want out of this life and how to get you there. It’s saying, “Come on. Let’s do this thing. Let’s go meet some new people. Let’s start this new business idea that we have. Let’s go on this great adventure because all of the other things that we want from our life are going to come out of this experience.” But, it’s always moving you into the unknown. Then, over here, you’ve got another voice, which is the voice of your brain, or your mind, or your ego, and it’s the lizard part of you, it’s the ancient part of you, it’s the survival part of you that wants to keep you safe and secure. So, there’s this internal conflict because everything that you want is in the uncertainty and the unknown, but the more dominant part of your mind wants to keep you safe and secure in the known. So, this dialogue and the emotions that spring from it are what that feeling of stuck is. It’s the anxiety, it’s the depression, it’s the feeling like you’re not really living the life that you dreamed of living. It’s the worry, and then that manifests as the complaining, and the resentment, and the anger, and all of the other ways that you’re showing up in life that you don’t feel good about.
So, what do we do about it? Well, the first thing we have to do is we have to become aware of this internal dialogue. So, you got to get really honest with what you want and then you got to listen to this voice in your head, your ego, that’s telling you why you can’t have it, all the reasons, all the stories, all the limiting beliefs. In fact, one of the things I do when I feel stuck is I get real quiet, I listen to that dialogue, and I start jotting it down. I’m not good enough. I’m not doing enough. There’s not enough time. Why would anybody want to hire me to do that? Other people are already so good at it, why would I think that I could do it? How am I ever going to catch up to them? It’s really, really important that you understand what it is you believe, and that’s what this voice represents. So, the first thing I do is, I start getting connected with that internal dialogue. It’s what we would call self-awareness. It’s why every great spiritual teacher, every leader, every philosopher, every phenomenal businessman, all the great industrialists, they all said the same thing: “Listen, if you want to create a life that you love, if you want to do something extraordinary and be someone extraordinary, you got to become self-aware” because it’s this internal dialogue and that voice in your head that’s dictating all the results in your life. It’s dictating all the actions that you take. It’s dictating your behaviors.
So, once you become aware of all these things that you’ve been believing for a very long time, the next thing to do is question it. Say, “Is that true? Is it really true that I can’t figure out what I need to do in order to move forward on this new business idea? Is it really true that there’s no good men or women left out there? Can’t I find some evidence that there might be a good man or women out there? Don’t I know someone who is in a quality relationship with the type of person that I’d like to be in a relationship with?” Another question you could ask yourself is, “How is the opposite true? How is the opposite of there’s no good men or women out there true? How is it absolutely true I’m going to find the man or woman of my dreams? How is it absolutely true that I’m capable of getting disciplined, and going to the gym, and losing 20 pounds? How is it absolutely true that I’m exactly the right person to open up that yoga studio or start pursuing my passion as a chef and creating a business out of it?” because the brain is this extraordinary technology that no one ever gave us a manual to. The brain will find an answer to every question you ask yourself. It’s just that, most of the time, we’ve been asking ourselves really crappy questions. So, you have to start asking better questions and you’ll start getting better answers.
Once you’ve really understood what this internal dialogue is and you start asking better questions to get better answers, it’s time to make a new decision. It’s time to make a new decision about your life. What most people want to do when they’re stuck is they want to know how they’re going to do this thing before they’re really willing to commit to it. They get it backwards because the key here is you make a new decision. You say, “I don’t know how, but I know that soon I’m going to find a way to transition out of this job that I’ve been working into the thing that I love. I don’t know how, but I know that soon I’m going to meet the man or woman of my dreams. I don’t know how, but I know that soon I’m going to be able to take that dream vacation that I’ve always wanted to do. I don’t know how, but I know that soon I’m going to start creating that work of art, or that musical piece, or that book that I’ve been wanting to create for a long, long time.” What happens is, as soon as you make the decision, you get the brain, you enroll the brain focused on that outcome, and that’s when the ideas start to happen. You say, “You know what? I could do this. I could do that.” Then, circumstances and coincidences in your life start to show up to support you.
When I started doing this work, I went from being an internet entrepreneur for the last 20 years to becoming a coach, a teacher, a trainer, and a healer. I didn’t know how I was going to do it, but I made a decision that it was going to happen. And, slowly but surely, I started having ideas, and they were inspired ideas, so it motivated me to take action. Then, other people started reflecting back to me the things that I thought I wanted to do and opportunities started to show up. My first keynote speech I did was simply out of a decision that I made that I was going to start doing keynotes and some random person emailed DavidBayer.com and offered me a keynote opportunity. So, what’s important is that you make the decision, not that you figure the how. The how comes afterwards.
From that point, we start to loosen up this stuck feeling and create some action and motion in our life that then feeds upon itself. The only other thing that can really stop you is fear. I like to call fear forgetting everything about reality. It’s forgetting the fact that every time you’ve been successful in your life, you’ve decided that you were going to take action. The path then unfolded for you along the way. And, while it never went the way you expected it to, it always went better. Things always worked out. Even when you thought that something was “failure,” you can look back now that time has passed and you can see it was exactly what needed to happen because it either redirected you along a different course, or it helped you learn the skills, or develop the character that you needed in order to ultimately accomplish the thing that you wanted to accomplish. So, fear is just part of that old, ancient part of the brain that’s trying to keep you stuck in certainty and security. But, ultimately, that’s not where we’re going to be fulfilled in our life.
So, again, I hope this has been helpful for you. If you’re feeling stuck, congratulations. You’re on the brink of creating a breakthrough to your dreams. Get aware of that internal dialogue. Question that voice that has all the stories and the reasons of why it can’t happen. Make a new decision about your life and then watch as all the ideas and the coincidences start to unfold. Take a little bit of action because life requires you to co-respond to it and, together, you and this infinite intelligence will create whatever it is that you want in your life. It is law. It’s worked for me every time I’ve applied it in my life and I’ve now been able to help thousands of other successful professionals, entrepreneurs, and CEOs accomplish their dreams by applying this simple formula.
So, I hope you’ve enjoyed this video. I hope it’s served you well. If you get a chance, come over to DavidBayer.com. Subscribe to our newsletter. Get daily inspiration, training, and suggestions on how you can reclaim your power, how you can live your purpose, and how you can love your life. Join us on our Facebook page as well. Many, many blessings. I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and today I want to speak to you about the present moment. You know, those of us who have been in this spiritual conversation or personal development conversation hear all the time from really incredible teachers, “You got to be present.” Right? Like, “Now is the only time.” “The power is in the now.” And, in my journey, I’ve always said, “Well, it sounds good when you say it fast and it kind of feels right, but why?” Why and how does it work? So, why is the present moment so important? When I talk to people about it, they go, “Well, because, you know, if you’re thinking about the past, the past is already gone so it’s a waste of your mental energy.” That’s true. Then they’ll say, “Well, if you’re thinking about the future, the future hasn’t happened yet. So, what’s the point of really thinking about the future? It’s a waste of energy.” And that’s true. But, that still doesn’t answer the question, “What’s so important about the present moment?”
So, I want to explain to you what is important about the present moment because I think, if you’re like me and you understand the importance, you will actually focus on being present more. So, here’s what’s so important about the present moment. The present moment is the moment, of course, that we’re experiencing life. As we’re experiencing life, we’re experiencing life through the lens of the decisions that we’ve made about life. So, we have, “Ooh, it’s about how life must be and life can’t be. Men and women must be, and men and women can’t be. We must be and we can’t be.” That’s our identity. But, in the present moment is when we are experiencing our rules, our beliefs, or what I like to call our decisions.
So, if there’s anything that doesn’t feel good in the present moment, it’s not congruent with the way that we want to live our lives. It’s not congruent with that higher, intelligent part of ourselves that sees every opportunity in every moment. It’s not congruent with what’s going to serve us best.
So, in the present moment, when you notice that you’re not feeling good, you want to pay attention to the thoughts you’re having because that’s going to reveal to you your blueprint. Right? Ultimately, that’s your subconscious mind. And since your subconscious mind drives all of the activities in your life, you want to start to become aware of the decisions that you’re making that don’t feel good because, ultimately, they’re not going to be creating experiences in your life that you want. So, the present moment is the moment. It’s the only time you can look at the way you’ve been looking at life and change it. You can come up with a new decision. You can say, “You know what? I no longer want to interpret this moment this way. I want to look at it this way. I want to have a little bit more gratitude about it. I’m going to incorporate a little bit more compassion. I’m going to develop a new rule set.”
When you do that, what’s so unbelievable is that your brain will change. It’s basically a signal to your brain saying, “Listen, dude, the way that you’ve been interpreting reality up until now is not appropriate based on what I want to accomplish.” The brain goes, “Oh, okay. I didn’t know that. Sorry. I’ll start to interpret your present moments from now on through this lens.” This is how you literally start to create a new reality. It’s how you start to become a new you. What’s so fascinating is we can study this. Under brain scan, Harvard Medical School brought in piano players, and they studied them while they played the piano, and we got to see what parts of the brain lit up. What’s so interesting is that they then brought the piano players in and they didn’t have them play the piano. They just had them imagine playing the piano and the same parts of the brain lit up. So, what we’ve learned is that the brain does not know the difference between what’s actually going on and what you imagine. So, if you imagine the present moment to be different than what it is, your brain begins to recalibrate and you start to view live through that lens. You start to enroll your brain in working for you rather than against you.
When you do this, it changes three things. You start to have more ideas that are congruent with the new decision. So, if you’re trying to figure out what you want to accomplish in life and you don’t know the how, the key is to make a new decision and you start to enroll new ideas. Look at it as opportunities abound me. New ideas that are opportunity oriented will start to come to you. The second thing is it changes a part of your brain called the reticular activating system. So, you literally start to see opportunities, experiences, and things that are congruent with this new decision that you’ve made the moment you make the new decision. And, of course, the third thing is you activate the power of coincidence. So, when you start to see life differently, life starts to show up differently to you.
So, I hope that makes sense. That’s why the present moment is so powerful. It’s the only time you can change the way that you’ve been viewing the world. When you change the way that you’ve been viewing the world, the world starts to show up very differently to you. So, this is kind of a reality hack.
Anyway, I hope you’ve enjoyed this video. Subscribe to my YouTube channel, would you? Comment below. Subscribe to my newsletter at davidbayer.com. Join in on the conversation. And, if you’d like to, follow me on Facebook. I hope you’ve enjoyed this video. Go out there and get it, live life powerfully, and have an amazing day.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and thanks for being here to watch this video. I wanted to talk about your “why.” Why is your why important? I ask, “Why?” all the time. “Why is this this way? Why are you telling me this? How could it be true?” I want to know why the why is important. So, I thought about it. I really appreciate this idea of the why and it really came out of Simon Sinek’s famous TEDTalk, The Golden Circle, where he talks about the why. But, why is your why important? Well, your why is important – first of all, what’s your why? The why is why you do what you do, what really drives you to go out and do whatever it is that you do, to be a fireman, to be an investment banker, to be a coach, to be a teacher, to be a mom – whatever it is that you do – to be a straight a student – what is driving you? What’s the big reason behind why you do what you do that allows you to, despite all of the challenges in life and all of the frustrations in life, to overcome everything? Right? It’s the fuel behind all the action that you’re willing to take, even in the face of adversity. So, discovering your why is really important. But, why is your why important?
Your why is important because it takes you out of yourself. Your why is the way out of selfishness. It’s the way out of being self-centered, which is really the way out of fear because fear is when we return to protecting ourselves. When we’re in fear, we’re living in lack, we’re living in scarcity, we’re living with resistance.
We’re not living in the flow of life. Ideas are not flowing to us. We don’t see opportunities in front of us. So, if we can get out of ourselves, if we can get out of fear, we can start playing in our art, we can start creating and manifesting in extraordinary ways. The way that we do that is by living in our why.
So, for example, I am driven to impact and transform the lives of people who are suffering. So, my why allows me to overcome any anxiety I might have about being onstage, or about shooting these videos, or about the work that I need to do late at night to create new online products and programs. Whatever it is that I’m doing, I’m driven by my why because it’s more important to me than the “pain” of all the things that I need to do. In fact, I don’t look at them as painful at all.
So, a lot of people want to know what their why is because they think it’s going to help them move forward in life and that’s so counterintuitive. It’s like we’re such a success-driven society now. It’s like, “I got to figure out what my why is because it’s going to give me the edge and I got to know my why.” Chill out about your why. All you need to do is start to notice what it is that gets you out of your own head. What is it that gets you out of worrying about how significant you are, or how much money you’re making, or whether or not you’re going to look good. What is the thing that gets you out connecting and contributing with people in the world and in service? So, whatever that thing is, that’s your why. But, it’s not really important that you know your why, it’s just important to get out of your own self-centered attitude, which we all do from time to time. So, anyway, I hope that’s been helpful. That’s why your why is important.
If you enjoyed this, subscribe to my YouTube channel and comment below. I review all the comments personally. Come over to davidbayer.com. Join my newsletter. Get involved in the conversation. If you’re on Facebook, come follow me on Facebook. We have a great time over there. Anyway, I hope this has been powerful for you. It’s been powerful for me. I hope you have a powerful day. Let’s be powerful. I’ll talk to you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it’s David Bayer and I want to thank you so much for being here today. I was having a conversation with a friend of mine recently who was really inspired to take his business to the next level. He wanted to double his business in the next twelve months, and one of the comments he made to me got me thinking. He said, “You know, I want to do this, but I don’t know how.” I realized at that time that he really didn’t understand the principles for winning, for creating whatever it is that he wants in his life, and for being certain about the fact that it’s going to happen. So, it inspired me to shoot this video today. I wanted to give you five distinctions for winning at anything, for creating the business that you’ve always dreamed of and ensuring its success, for taking a business that you’ve already built and for taking it to the next level and executing on the vision that you have for it, for doing something completely different like writing a book and having it become a New York Times bestseller, becoming the best in your space or in your industry -- whether you’re a speaker, a coach, an author, a yoga instructor, a chef -- it doesn’t matter – but for winning at whatever it is that you do.
So, here are the five distinctions for winning. The first distinction is decision. You have to decide what you’re going to do and that you’re going to be successful at it. It doesn’t really matter what it is. What most people do is they make the mistake of thinking they have to figure out the “how” first and they get it backwards because, the moment you make a decision, you enroll in the most incredible technology and support that we have available to us to aid you in whatever it is you’re looking to accomplish – and that’s your brain. So, your brain is paying attention to a lot of different things. But, the moment you make a decision, it focuses like a laser on your desired outcome.
So, you start to have ideas. You start to develop a strategy. You start to develop an action plan. But, that only comes out of the decision. And, like my friend, he was waiting to kind of figure out how he could do it before he fully committed to the fact that it was going to happen. But, it’s that commitment, it’s that decision that starts to change things. We actually can see a change in your brain when you make a decision, and you start to notice all the circumstances, all the coincidences, all the people who have always been there who can aid you in the accomplishment of this thing that you simply didn’t notice before.
The second distinction is to study the best people in your space. Study the best authors. Study the best business people. Study the best CEOs who are operating in your industry and find out what is it that they’re doing that’s working. Oftentimes, when we start to notice other people and their success, the mind will kick in and we start to compare. Then, we start to ask questions that don’t serve us well, like, “Well, could I really do this? They’re so far ahead of me. If they’re already doing it, why would anybody be interested in the fact that I’m doing it?” What you need to do is you need to realize that there’s always going to be this part of you that compares and just allow it to compare. You don’t have to buy into it, but you can notice and study what it is that other people are doing that’s working. That’s one of the things that I’ve done over the last years. I’ve looked at what are the most effective ways to get my message out there and I noticed that people are doing two things. The people who are leading my industry are producing a tremendous amount of great content and they’re advertising. They’re finding ways to be able to spend more money on advertising. So, I committed to those two things this year. I studied what people were doing and I decided that I would do those things too.
But, the third distinction is that I’m not just going to do those things. I’m going to do more of those things. So, I’m going to study the landscape of what’s working in my industry, and I’m going to figure out the two or three things that the best of the best are doing, and that’s what I’m going to focus on, and I’m going to do it more than anybody else. I’m going to create more videos, I’m going to produce more content, I’m going to spend more money on advertising, and I’m going to find ways to do it. You can do the same thing. So, what’s working right now in the area that you want to pursue? What are other people doing that is leading them to success and what can you do to do more of it? It’s not really about hard work. You’ll be doing more work than anyone else. But, when you know that something is working, it’s exciting. Right? When you know that whatever it is that you’re doing is going to lead you to winning, to your victory, to your goal, to the vision that you have for yourself, your business, and your life, you don’t really have to push yourself to do the work. It becomes more work, but it’s not about hard work because, when we start thinking about hard work, it’s not very inspiring to do. But, when we know that it’s going to work, we can do a lot more of it.
The fourth thing is that you need to innovate. You have to say, “You know, these things are working, and I’m going to do them, and I’m going to do them more than anyone else. I’m going to practice more than anyone else. I’m going to perform more than anyone else. I’m going to speak more than anyone else because I want to develop myself into a world-class speaker, or chef, or yoga instructor, whatever it is.” But, you also have to innovate. You have to ask powerful questions about how you can serve your audience better than anybody else. What can I do to get my message out there faster? What can I do to get my message out there in a way that it’s more impactful? What can I do to serve my customers in an even greater way so that they become raving fans and so that I can build a recurring base of customers, for example, if you’re starting a business? You have to ask powerful questions and they need to be along the lines of what can you do bigger, faster, better to create more of an impact with your existing audience?
The fifth thing is that you have to believe. It sounds like it’s something that makes sense, but we sort of take it for granted. You have to believe in yourself. You have to believe that, if you have this idea to go do something, you’re guaranteed to be successful if you just pursue it because this idea was given to you. You have to believe in this process that we’re talking about because the one thing that you need to hold onto when times get tough, and they will get tough because things are not going to go the way that you expect them to even though they’re going to go perfectly, oftentimes you’re going to have expectations about the way it should go and it’s going to go differently, and you have to trust. You have to have faith. You have to believe that ultimately you’re being guided to your final destination in a way that is more effective than what you originally had in mind.
So, those are the five steps. Make a decision. Model the best. Do more than anybody else of what works. Innovate and ask powerful questions. And believe in yourself. Believe in your vision. Believe in this process and, ultimately, you can win at anything.
I hope this has been helpful for you. I’d love to know your thoughts. Feel free to comment below. Come on over to davidbayer.com and check out the conversation. We’re always having intelligent, interesting, and very powerful conversations about what you can do to claim your power, live your purpose, and love your life. Check out our Facebook page. I look forward to seeing you in the next video and I’ll speak to you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer. I want to thank you so much for being here today, and today's topic is positivity. And I'm going to explain to you why I think positivity is B.S. So, you know, a lot of the people that I work with they get into spiritual concepts around Law of Attraction, or creating what you want in your life, and how thoughts are things, and all of that is absolutely true, right? I mean one of the cornerstones of the work that I do and so many great modern teachers do is around Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich. It's an amazing book. The conclusion was thoughts are things and what we think creates our reality.
But, the reason why being positive is B.S. is because most people aren't really being positive at an unconscious level, right? So, they think positivity. They say, "Well, I'm being positive, and I really want this thing, and I know that it's going to work out." But, right behind them is their unconscious mind saying, "Why isn't it happening, and how come it hasn't happened yet, and how come they have it, but I don't have it, and when is it ever going to happen for me?" And, unfortunately, the reason why most people don't change their lives, why they're stuck, and why they never accomplish their goals and dreams is because they're not willing to do the deep psychological work. It sucks. It's no fun to really get close up and personal with your limiting beliefs and to see that you've been believing stupid stuff your whole life that hasn't felt good, you know, that you really don't think you're good enough, or that there's not enough time, or that money's hard to come by. Those aren't feelings, or beliefs, or stories that feel good. But, the reality is we have to get into them.
You know, Yoda has this amazing quote where he says, "Named must your fear be before vanquish it you can." And, so, we have to get familiar with our unconscious mind and all of the stupid stuff that our survival-based mechanism has us believing. And, so, that's why positivity is B.S. It's a cover-up right now. I'm all for optimism. I'm all for gratitude. I think that there really is a lot to be positive about. Life is always working for you, not against you. But, it's important that you dig up the stuff that's underneath first; otherwise, you just don't have fertile soil to give sprout to your ultimate dreams.
So, I want to give you a couple of tips on how to do that. The first thing is, notice when you don't feel good. Whenever you don't feel good, you've got something going on in your unconscious mind that's generating those feelings, right? If you go back to some of my work, I talk about the five primary drivers -- whatever we believe generates our thoughts that generate our feelings. If you don't feel good, you're having thoughts unconsciously that are crappy thoughts. And it's important for you to look at them, see them for the lies that they are, come up with a new truth for yourself, and transform them.
The second thing is to look at any area of your life where you're stuck. You know, if you're stuck and you're not progressing and moving forward, it's because you've got this crap going on in your unconscious mind as well. It's keeping you stuck. It's preventing you from taking inspired and creative action, right? It's generating feelings like worry, and fear, and anxiety, and the result of that is absolute inaction. And, if you look at the most extraordinary, legendary people in the history of the world, the reason why they accomplished so much was that they figured out how to master this psychology.
And the last area is wherever you're creating something that you really don't want. You know, if you go and you look at Law of Attraction or you start to understand quantum physics, and things are showing up in your life that you don't want, it's a reflection of what you've been thinking. So, what you need to do is, the moment you experience that thing that you don't like, notice what you think because whatever it is that you're thinking, right, that's what you were thinking before that created that thing. Experiences in our life are God's divine gift to us to help us shift our unconscious thoughts into our conscious awareness. But, most of us don't use that opportunity for what it is. So, when you experience something that you don't like, boom. Notice what you're thinking about it, and then go question, was that true? And use a tool or technique. I provide many, so do other people, to transform it. So, that's the inside out work. That's why I think positivity is B.S. -- not really, but you get my point. You can't cover it up. You got to do the deep work and, then, everything becomes possible for you in your life.
I hope you enjoyed that. I hope it was helpful. Many blessings to you and I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer. I want to thank you so much for being here today, and today I want to talk about starting your day in a new way. You know, for so many years of my life, I really rushed into my day. I'd wake up. I'd oversleep. I'd hit the snooze button a couple of times. I'd have a couple of cups of coffee before I even started thinking about my day, and I would rush into work and just go into the day head on. And, ultimately, what happened is I would just roll one day into the next. I'd find a little bit of break on the weekend. I'd try to recharge. And I see so many people still doing that today, so I wanted to speak to that because, ultimately, you know, living life, enjoying life, and bringing our best into the world is about reconnecting with ourselves and most of us don't take the time to do that. So, I want to share with you the practice that I've developed and it's a practice that I picked up on from some of the most powerful, inspiring, and creative people in the world. It's more of an inside out game. So, it's about working our psychology in the morning so that we're not bringing our stress, and our worries, and our anxieties from the day before into today.
And, so, the routine is very simple. I wake up about an hour earlier than I used to and I spend some time meditating. So, what's meditation? Well, a lot of people think that meditation is going into a quiet room, and closing your eyes, and sitting cross legged, and putting on some incense, and zen-ing out. And, at some level, it is. But, really, meditation is something that we want to carry into our entire day. So, it's about being present and noticing the thoughts as they occur for us and not necessarily acting out our thoughts, but being an independent observer of our mind, and then choosing to be inspired and empowered in the action that we take. But, most of our days, we live very unconsciously. We just start to play out the limiting beliefs, and the stories, and the thoughts that we're having, and we show up in life that way. So, meditation is a practice where you start to train yourself to become mindful. So, it's a very simple practice. I take about 10 to 20 minutes in the morning and I focus on my breathing. I relax. I close my eyes. And I just notice. I just notice when I think and I just focus on my breathing. And, when I find myself automatically thinking about my thoughts, that's fine. I just notice that and I bring myself right back to my breathing again. I do that for about 10 to 20 minutes. Initially, it was a little bit uncomfortable. It's not the way that the brain is designed to operate. It's a system that's supposed to constantly be looking out for problems and help you survive. So, to get it to really slow down Starting Your Day in a New Way and just to observe your thoughts can be challenging. But, over the course of about 30 days, it could become a very, very easy practice for you and it's been transformative in my life.
The second thing that I do is I stretch my imagination. You know, so often, we kind of give up on our imagination. It becomes an atrophied muscle. We start to live life the way that we've always lived life. A lot of the people I work with describe it as Ground Hog's Day, that famous movie with Bill Murray. But, stretching our imagination is about creating a different future for ourselves. And a lot of people don't realize that imagination is about creating something in yourmind that never existed before. It's about a new mental image. You know, Walt Disney was such an extraordinary example of imagination because he created such amazing mental images that ultimately he brought into the world through the Disney theme parks, and Mickey Mouse, and all the different characters. So, imagination is key to creating a different life for yourself. In fact, I believe it's key to creating an extraordinary life and a life that you love. So, my practice for imagination is, in the morning right after my meditation, I write down 10 to 15 things that I've never really thought about before, things that I may want in my life. Recently, I imagined opening up an orphanage. I also imagined flying private jet charter, not just once, but all of the time. And, so, imagination is about putting down something that's new that you want in your life and don't get caught up in the way that your mind will work. You don't have to worry about the how, or the what, or the who, or the when, or where is this going to happen, or why hasn't it happened yet, or is it really possible. You just jot it down. The amazing thing that I found in my life is, one, it feels good. I love just writing down all these different ideas and starting to play with life again. It brings me back to my adolescence, really having curiosity around what's possible. But, the other thing is that these things that I write down, they tend to start showing up in my life or I start to notice opportunities to bring those things into my life, but I'm now present to it. It's in my conscious mind. And, so, that's how you create an expansive life for yourself moving forward. It's how you expand your consciousness by expanding your imagination.
The third thing that I would encourage you to do is to visualize. Visualize your goals. If you don't have goals, right, 90-day goals, one-year goals, five-year goals, ten-year goals, if you haven't started to think about charting out the course of your life, I encourage you to do that because you certainly aren't going to get to a destination that you desire if you haven't charted a course. And that's not to say that you don't allow life to take you through its twists and turns and experience life as a journey, but have an idea of where you want to go. And, then, really get into the feeling of experiencing it now. One of the keys to attracting these things into our life and to being motivated to take the appropriate action to create the things that we want in our life is to experience what it would feel like now. A lot of us want to have the experience so that we can have the emotions. The key is to generate the emotions from within and the experience will come later on. So, visualize. You know, what would it look like to have that dream job, or take that dream vacation, or to have that certain amount of money in your bank account, or being in that extraordinary relationship, or to be in that type of physical fitness that you envision for yourself? Get into how it would feel, what it would sound like, what it would smell like, what it would taste like, what you would see. All of the sensory data around it, experience it now and enjoy that just for the sake of enjoying it, and you will see that the manifestation must occur later on in your life.
The fourth thing is gratitude. Gratitude is the royal road to happiness. So many people I talk to, they want to get from where they are to a different place, like where they want to be. But, what they don't understand is that, to unlock them from where they are, they have to appreciate where they are now. You know, when you really appreciate the job that you have, even though you know it's not your dream job, or you appreciate all the things about the relationship, even though you know this isn't your soulmate, you unlock the possibility of moving to a new place. But, if you're constantly focused on why isn't it happening, when is it going to happen for me, how did I get here, how come it's happening for other people, it's going to keep you stuck. So, what I like to do is I like to have gratitude. I come up with 15 to 20 different gratitudes. Sometimes, I do the same gratitude every day. I'm always grateful for the relationship I'm in. I'm always grateful for my dog. I'm grateful for the place that I live. But, notice the other things that came up in the last 24 hours for you to be grateful for, the little synchronicities, the experiences in life, the little gifts that life has given you and have gratitude for them.
And the fifth thing is to really take care of your body in the morning, right? To take care of your body -- not only what you put in, but what you put out. So, you know, I cut caffeine. I like to hydrate early on in the morning. I do a lot of alkalizing and green drink because what that ultimately does is it calms down my system. It allows me to be more mindful. It allows me to have access to more imagination. And it allows me to be more present for my visualization and my gratitude. All of this is a system that feeds back into itself. If you have a very hyperactive, over-caffeinated, acidic body, it's going to be very hard for your mind to be operating the way that you want it to operate in the way that I just described. So, watch what you put in and then what you put out. Exercise in the morning. Produce the chemicals and the hormones that are going to allow you to feel good and, again, strengthen those other four areas.
So, this is my Five to Thrive. It's my Hour of Power. It's what I do in the morning. You know, I don't always enjoy getting up an hour earlier than what I used to do, but that's what I do now and it's really transformed my life. And, again, when you go and you look at the most successful, powerful, creative, and inspired people in the world, in one way, shape, or form, they all have these daily rituals that they practice.
So, I would encourage you to start this tomorrow. Get up 20 minutes earlier, 30 minutes earlier. Incorporate a little bit of meditation, and visualization, gratitude. Just incorporate a little bit of what I've talked about, and do a little bit every day, and it will build on itself because you'll enjoy the process so much. And, if you do it for 30 days, you'll develop a new habit out of it. And, if you take care of the morning, the morning will take care of the rest of your day. It's very, very critical. So, that way, you have a little bit of connection with yourself, a little bit of the quiet stillness of spending time in your mind really getting to know your authentic self, to connect with your spirituality. It'll be all the difference. It'll re-energize you, not just physically, but emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually as well.
So, I hope that's helpful. I encourage you to try that. It's been transformative for my life. Many, many blessings. It's great to speak to you, as always, and I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
Hey, it's David Bayer. I want to thank you so much for being here today, and I want to talk to you about something that most people struggle with, and that's time. Most people think there's, frankly, not enough time and I get how we could come to that conclusion. You know, when we look at all the things that we have to do on a daily basis, it seems like more things are piling up. We have all of our social media accounts to manage. I mean, my God, how could there be enough time? And it's amazing because technology has evolved and it's supposed to give us more time in our life and make things easier, but it seems like the more that technology evolves, the less time that we actually have because there's more things now that we have to do, and pay attention to, and manage.
But, the key to creating more time in your life is really a key that's a psychological one. So, we spend so much time worrying, you know, worrying that we're not good enough, worrying that there's not enough time, being afraid that we're going to do something wrong, questioning the decisions that we made in the past, worrying about the things that we have to do in the future that we're not present for now. And the only time that we have time is now. And, when we give up our now moment, the amazing now as I like to call it, for being in our heads about the past, or the future, or other things that we're worried about, we don't fully take advantage of the time that we have.
So, you know, the most successful people in the world and really the key to time management is about just being present, being present for what's available now. What do I need to do now? It's about noticing the thoughts that you have that might be worrying about the past or the future and just letting them go, not investing yourself in those thoughts, right? I mean so often, if you added up all of the time that you were worrying about things, or anxious about things, or overwhelmed about things, you'd have years of mental time available to you. Well, what would you do with all that thinking? Do you think maybe your future actions would be a little bit clearer? You'd be a little bit more directed in the things that you want to do? You'd understand how to do things more efficiently if you were able to focus and concentrate on things a little bit more? I mean many of us have spent a decade in these negative, wasted energy time zones of negative thoughts.
So, when you start to notice yourself worrying about time, the first thing that you can do is start to use that time more efficiently. Bring yourself away from that, right? Don't fall for the illusion of time. Bring yourself back to the present moment and say, "You know, what is the outcome that I'm looking for right now? You know, is it that I'm trying to take care of my body and I'm headed to the gym? Do I need to take care of my family and get some food on the table tonight and figure out what the dinner plan is going to be? Am I focused on my career right now and some outcomes I had with some projects at work?" Maybe you're an entrepreneur and you're thinking about the new business. What's the outcome right now that you're looking for? And, then, put your focus on that, right? Put your focus and your attention on that and take action around that now. And that can change ten minutes from now, but we'll reevaluate then. There's a big difference between then and now.
And, so, if you really get what I'm saying, we spend so much of our mental energy on other times other than now. And then, ultimately, the result of that is that we don't have enough time, that if we can just bring ourselves back to focusing on what needs to be done in the present moment, you'll find that you have more time for the things that you need to do.
So, I'd encourage you to try that. Try that today. Notice when you're thinking about the past, or the future, or worrying about what if, or what had been, and just bring yourself back to the present moment and ask yourself two questions. What's my outcome right now and what action can I take right now to move towards it? And, then, take that action. It's really as simple as that. If you can develop that into a daily practice and not spend so much time in your head, but more time in the physical world in the amazing now, I believe that everything will change for you as I know it has changed for my life.
So, I hope that's been helpful. It's just a short tip. Many, many blessings and I will see you soon.
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SUMMARY
People say to me “David, I can’t do what you’re doing. I can’t make the types of life changes that you’ve made. It’s too crazy.” No, it’s not crazy, it’s called BOLD. And the reason that you’re stuck in your life in whatever area that you feel unfulfilled in is because you aren’t choosing to be Bold. You’re living Life timid and Life doesn’t reward timid. If you really want everything that life is willing to offer you, you have to be Bold and step up and claim what’s yours. So here are my 3 tips on how to be BOLDER in your life.
#1 – Decide to Be Bold
I coach a woman that wants to be more engaged, more involved in life. She wants to be more aggressive about pursuing her dreams, to be unstoppable. But every time we start delving into what she needs to do to be bold and move forward, she’d focus on spending more time resolving the stuff that happened to her in the past. I get it. Things happened to her in her childhood or while she was growing up where at some point she decided it was best to be timid. We all do this. But she already knows this. How much time do we want to spend digging through all that stuff in the past? Finally I said to her STOP! If we’re going to move forward we need to move forward. How would you need to show up in order to BOLD? What would BOLD you look like? I told her the only thing standing between you and BOLDNESS is your decision to be BOLD. We just need to make the decision rather than believe that there’s something else we need to do before we do. JUST DECIDE. That leads me to my second point.
#2 – Start BEING Bold
Once you make the decision, you now have to be BOLD. So it follows that you need to understand what Bold looks like. When you’re BOLD how are you using your body? What language do you use? Do you focus your attention on things like ‘well what if this thing that I’m trying to accomplish doesn’t happen’ or ‘what if they don’t like me’ or do you focus on crushing it and overcoming any obstacle that comes your way. Do you focus on enrolling people to come along with you on your journey and focus on convincing them versus worrying about what they are going to think or say? The second thing we need to do now that we’ve decided is to be BOLD and that comes down to three things:
Physiology:
When you’re being bold, do you look up or look down when you’re speaking with someone? Are your shoulders back or hunched over? Do you feel grounded in your feet or unstable? Do you speak with authority and clarity or do you mumble? Boldness has a physical pattern in the body that we can access any time we simply want to be bold. There’s this idea of ‘act as if’ – act as if you are bold. I prefer to think of it more like just be the boldness that’s always been in you. Just let it out. When you commit to being BOLD in your life, or being anything for that matter, start paying attention to your physical body and whenever you notice that you aren’t in a BOLD stance – boom be physically bold again. If you pay attention to this after a while you’ll find that you’ll start to train your nervous system and your physiology to just be BOLD. Most of us have trained ourselves to be timid – now we simply need to develop a new pattern and one way we can do that is by using our physical body. Not all BOLD people were always BOLD I know I wasn’t. But it was important to me because I wanted to Master my world and I knew that I needed to learn how to be BOLD in order to do that. Timid people don’t run their show – the show runs them.
Language:
The second way to be Bold is to notice what language you’re using. What language do Bold people use – do they say ‘gee I hope it works out’ or ‘what if it doesn’t work out what am I going to do’ or ‘I don’t know what are other people going to think?’ Or do they move through life confidently thinking or saying ‘I know I’m the shit and no matter what happens everything that I need in order to continue to move forward and grow and be prosperous, that’s what I’m going to get out of this experience. Good or bad I’m going to make it great.” You have to pay attention to the words you are using and your self-talk and transform it into the language of BOLD when you notice that you are in a pattern of TIMID.
Focus:
The third way to BE BOLD is to notice what you’re focusing on. Whatever you put your attention on is going to determine how you show up. BOLD people have a natural tendency to put their attention on opportunities, potential victories, what’s working, what’s great about them. TIMID people focus on what could go wrong, what might happen if, what they should have done better, what they don’t have. What you FOCUS on dictates everything about how you show up in life so if you find yourself focused on something that makes you feel TIMID – BAM change your focus. Put your attention on something, anything, from the past, present or future, that makes you feel BOLD. Focus intently on that thing until you bring boldness back into your body and into your language – until you become BOLD again.
If you want to develop a new habit of Boldness, you must be consistently aware of what’s going on with your language and your focus and your physiology. Stop checking your news feed or your twitter and take a moment to pay attention to what you’re doing. I’m telling you it will transform your life.
#3- Seek Opportunities to be BOLD
The third thing I want you to do is seek out opportunities to express your boldness. Have you ever had a thought about doing something and then you think to yourself ‘I don’t know what if it doesn’t go well’ and you start to move away from it – maybe it’s ask out a guy or a girl or you have an idea at work and you’re in a meeting but you just end up keeping it to yourself. That’s when I want you to step up and BE BOLD. As soon as you notice yourself being timid about something the next you thing you do is be BOLD. Don’t give timid breathing room. If there’s something that make you uncomfortable at the thought of doing it – Bam that’s the next thing you do. You eat TIMID alive by stepping into your boldness the second you feel like you’re backing down. The first few times might be uncomfortable, it’s like jumping into a cold swimming pool – but after a few times the shock wears off and pretty soon your default response in situations is going to be to go right to bold. Close the gap between an opportunity to be Bold and Timid. Suffocate timid – snuff it out, and step into your Boldness again and again and again until it becomes your baseline behavior. You can use this framework to develop any character trait that you want to assume. This is how you can be more passionate, or energetic or confident or whatever.
So here’s a quick recap. 3 things you need to do to be more bold #1 decide to be bold, just make the decision. Make the decision that you want to show up in life on you terms and put life to work for you not the other way around. Life happens because you say so, not because you’re floating around on it like a cork on the ocean just praying that you won’t be tossed against the rocks. #2 Be Bold. Pay attention to your physical body, pay attention to your language and your self-talk. Any time you’re patterning after TIMIDITY go back to patterning after what BOLD looks like. Put your attention on the things and ask the questions that BOLD people would ask. Stay focused on the types of thoughts that feel empowering. Any time you start to feel TIMID again you know your focus has drifted – shift it – bring it right back to BOLD thoughts or memories. Lastly, pursue opportunities to be Bold. Notice when you’re in a situation and you start to shirk away and be timid again and BAM step up and let the BOLD you come out. Don’t sit in TIMID and stare at BOLD. Push TIMID in the pool and go right in after it. You do this a few times, it’ll change the way you show up in every aspect of your life. And that my friend, is how you Live Life Powerfully.
