Fala Amo (Jason Todd x Reader)
Happy valentine’s day @angel-kissed-ginger! I was your secret valentine. I hope you love it, I had an absolute blast writing it and I hope it meets your expectations. Eat lots of chocolate today and hang with the people you love, okay? :)
theme: Just let your heart speak up, and I’ll know / No amount of words could ever find a way to make sense of this
warnings: ya typical jason todd warnings; it’s actually p mellow but I was snoopin’ on Belle a smidge and saw she liked angst, so I had to make it a lil angsty lmao
Another day, another horrendously boring shift at your grandmother’s oddities shop.
You had blown the same piece of hair out of your face about fifty times, long giving up on trying to place it back properly. Leaned back in a rickety chair, feet propped on the counter, you couldn’t believe your cousin had roped you into taking their shift on a festival day. Easy money, they had promised. No one will enter the shop, they swore.
They had been right. You wished they weren’t; without the human interaction, you swore you were slowly, dreadfully, going insane.
Gaze wandering, you observed the wooden beams and shelves of your grandmother’s shop, every nook and cranny crammed with knick knacks and trinkets, all different shapes and sizes and colors. Some to ward off evil, some to grant wishes, other to vanquish foes or make the owner wealthy…or so your grandmother claimed. Now in her high nineties, she still ran and managed the shop, selling to travelers and townspeople alike. Your Bibi ran the shop nine to five during the week, never quitting, and you and your cousin would pick up weekends to help. Bibi claimed everything in the shop was really, truly magical, and you always rolled your eyes behind her back when she sweet talked another customer into buying something. You always thought they just felt sorry for the old woman, but then again, you never saw a bad review on the shop. Only positives. It gave you pause, wondering if the stuff in here really was magical, before you would shake your head and go back to reading your book behind the counter.
The sunlight from outside glinted through a starcatcher, angled just right to shine on a bracelet on display in the glass case. Wincing at the sparkle glaring right in your face, you slammed your feet onto the ground as you jerked back, almost falling off the chair. Blinking, you felt for the offender and pulled it out of the case, observing it. It had to be new, or newer, or maybe you simply hadn’t cared to notice, but it was the most beautiful colored bracelet you had ever seen, gleaming with gemstones swirling with embers that caught the afternoon sun. Mesmerized, you slipped it on, admiring it; maybe your grandmother would give it to you if you asked nicely.
The little bells over the door chimed a customer warning, and you brought your hands to your chest, sleeve falling over the pretty bracelet as you smiled and looked toward the entry. Three people, two men and one woman, entered. You didn’t know the men, but the female with dark hair and long legs was a regular.
“Zatanna!” You chirped, waving. “Lovely to see you again!”
“(Y/N)? You’re here! I thought your cousin was in today,” she hummed, smiling nonetheless. She came right over to the counter, men following her, the shorter one looking on in awe at everything while the one in the red hoodie looked…well, dead. He looked like a zombie walking, dark circles under his eyes and skin a pallid grey, hair peeking out from under his hood dry, one white streak visible. You couldn’t help but stare, and he caught your gaze, glaring ferociously at you before scoffing and turning away. A chill went down your spine, and you remembered the baseball bat that Bibi kept behind the counter, thinking about grabbing it. The shorter male had caught the interaction and elbowed the other, smiling gently, apologetically at you. Zatanna called you again. “(Y/N)?”
“O-oh, yes! No, I mean, uh…I’m covering for them today,” you blundered out, refocusing on her. You could feel the man’s glare drilling into your head and you winced, trying to ignore it. “What can I get you today?”
“Actually, I think I see it right there. Can I have that bracelet, please?” You looked down, noting that the bracelet you still had on your wrist had a matching sibling, opposite color scheme of the one still on your wrist. With haste, you pulled out the ring of gems, handing it to her, and she turned to the man in the red hood.
“I am not putting that on,” he growled, the hairs on the back of your neck prickling at the hostility. Zatanna was unfazed, pushing forward again, the man he was with putting a hand on his shoulder.
“Jason, please,” he begged, voice low and strained. “This could help.”
“I’m fine,” Jason growled out, a deadly warning. “Or I would be fine, if you would just leave me alone!”
“You’re not fine,” the man spoke, arms crossing, speaking quickly but audibly, leaving you baffled by the exchange. “Yesterday you nearly beat the Penguin to death; the day before that, you shoved Two Face off an interchange into oncoming traffic.”
“He landed heads up, he’s fine,” Jason scoffed. The two had only glares for him, and you watched, confused, observing the exchange nervously. Glancing between the two, Jason sighed, resigned, anger evaporating off of him as he held out a wrist. “Whatever. It’s not going to work. You said it needed a pair. I only see one.”
“Oh! that’s because I have…it…” your voice trailed off as Zatanna pushed the bracelet onto his wrist, and it was silent for a moment, before Jason blinked; his skin turned less gray, more blood in his cheeks, with clearer eyes and not as dark rings under his eyes. His posture straightened and he stretched, taller than before, licking his lips nervously as he looked at Zatanna, then at you, blue eyes crystal clear. You watched in awe, never having seen anything like it, before you felt your heart give a painful, hard beat, then another, your hand scrambling to clench at the fabric of your shirt as you stared at the counter top, patterns in the glass swirling into dark shapes and ominous figures.
Feelings of betrayal and loss flew across your mind, emotions that weren’t yours; thoughts of death, of rising, of not being the same permeated your brain. So overwhelming, you couldn’t imagine how Jason was dealing with all these thoughts all day and night, alone and cold, thoughts of the grave behind every emotion.
Wait…how did you know Jason’s feelings?
He was staring at you when you finally looked up, shaking and gulping. It was a mesmerizing stare, like a prisoner spotting his freedom for the first time, gates open and whole world calling him. Your soul ached for him, hurt for him, as he focused on you, your eyes tearing up. You didn’t even know this man, but it felt like you did; he was in so much pain, feeling like no one cared for him, the only relief coming from solitude and fighting, day in and day out.
Then, Jason turned and sprinted out of the shop, your hand coming up to reach for him.
“Hey, wait–!” You tried, voice high and squeaking, but the door slammed shut, only the tingle of the bell above filling the dreadful space.
Zatanna swerved, grabbing your outstretched wrist, observing the bracelet you still had on your wrist. “Oh, (Y/N). Why?”
“I thought it was just a bracelet?” you spluttered out, confused. It was just a trinket! “What is going on here, Zatanna? Who was that? And what…what happened to him?”
She shared a look with her companion, and he shook his head, looking at you with a gentle smile. “I’m sorry, it’s not our place to tell you.”
“But…” your voice faded, another feeling washing over you; Jason, you knew it was Jason by how the thoughts implied leather and smoke, red hoods and motorbikes, libraries with classics begging to be read. It caused the hairs on your arms to raise, as you realized it was fear you felt; fear that you had seen him, right through his hard, outer shell to the real thoughts he harbored, not so tough in reality. Scenes of a riverfront and a hard bench came to you, and your feet were moving before you could stop them, out the front door and apologizing to Zatanna, asking her to watch the shop as the bell sang above you.
You ran as fast as you could, the dark night encroaching and terrifying, huffing all the while, reaching the river in record time as you wheezed, attempting to get air back in your lungs. The sun was setting over the water and it glistened like the gems on your wrist, and as you flicked your eyes upwards, you caught sight of Jason’s broad back, taught and tense, fists clenching and frustrated in his hoodie pocket. You knew he sensed you and he turned his head slightly, glaring at you.
“Go away,” he warbled out, voice unsteady. Biting your lip, you almost fled at the hostility, but another wave of feeling washed over you, giving you pause.
“…no,” you spoke, taking steps forward, standing behind him, not sitting. You gave him plenty of room, two feet of space between the both of you. A crow called overhead and you watched the gulls of the river take flight, drawing aimless patterns in the sky. Neither of you spoke; Jason antsy in his shoes, you giving him space, wondering just what had compelled you to find him.
It grew dark without the two of you speaking, an uneasy peace between you both. Jason took a deep breath, standing and turning from you, but not without some parting words. “Why did you follow me?”
You honestly didn’t know; something deep inside had willed you to him, and you had complied. Shrugging, you wrapped your arms around yourself, watching the outline of his back in the city lights.
“I thought… you needed me. So I came.”
Silence, cold and raw, but you knew it was fake; he was mulling over your words, absorbing them, before suddenly the door that had opened between your two worlds was screaming at you, howls of pain and anguish, and you sank onto the bench as your head pounded to a haunting drum. Jason threw you a tense glare over his shoulder, and you jerked back, hand to your temple as you grit your teeth, unsure again.
“I don’t need anyone,” he spat, sneering at you; empty words, you knew as much as he tried to hide it. But your heart still sank, troubled, and maybe it was the shadows of the streetlights but you thought you saw him wince before turning around. “So get lost. And tell my dumbass brother I won’t be coming home.”
Stunned, you watched him walk away, crowds parting for his bulk. You waited and stared until you could no longer see him, the crowd devouring him, and unsure of what to do, you simply returned back to the shop, dazed as the bell above rang out your arrival. Your grandmother was there, crooked and wise, looking at you thoughtfully. She snatched your wrist and observed the bracelet, tutting as she did.
She sat you down and began to explain, Zatanna not far behind, Jason’s brother close. Your bracelet and Jason’s were connected; two halves of the same whole, meant to be stabilizers for the other. Unknowingly, you had become Jason’s anchor; a stabilizing person in his turbulent emotions, always and ever fickle. The bracelet you were wearing was meant for someone else, but it had accepted you as a host and latched on for good.
“So I’m like…a sponge?” you asked, shook to the core. You did not sign up for this.
“More like a siphon,” Zatanna explained, relating the mystic power to something more accurate. “Jason…well, Jason’s been through a lot. We wanted to try and alleviate some of the effects of…recent events, but not by using you. We’re sorry, (Y/N).”
The sparkling of the bracelet had your attention as you absorbed it; they weren’t lying, you knew that. Those feelings before, they hadn’t been yours. You had never felt those emotions so strongly in your life. You just knew who that they belonged to Jason, and as you gnawed on your lip you gathered your thoughts, heart aching for him.
“Bibi will get that thing off you, (Y/N),” you grandmother declared, waddling over to a shelf full of old papers and scrolls. She hummed as she perused the shelves, snapping her fingers when she found the one she was looking for, dragging it out from under a stack of books that clattered to the ground. She kicked them to the side before waddling back over, taking your wrist in her hands. “Let Bibi see, child.”
She took your wrist gently, before you blinked and snatched it close, hand covering the bracelet, guarding it. Your grandmother looked up, observing you.
“No!” you rushed, stunned at your words but believing them to be the utmost truth of your spirit. A shaky breath, and you gathered yourself, twisting the bracelet nervously on your wrist. Zatanna and Jason’s brother looked on from behind. “Will this….if I leave it on, will it help him? Help Jason?”
“Hm,” your grandmother pondered. “Well, certainly. But, you wish to proceed? It will not be pleasant, child.”
“Yes.” The conviction in your voice was strong. “I’m positive. Let me help him.”
You left the bracelet on. For months, Jason Todd stayed completely clear of you; you never saw him, but you could feel him. Your grandmother advised that whenever you sensed him becoming unbound, to try and counteract the emotions with your own. It was hard; Jason’s loneliness was overpowering, his rage blinding, his distrust immense. But did you try; many days the emotions would strike suddenly and ferociously, and it drained you to fight them with positive effects, but you never complained. Zatanna and Jason’s brother would drop by the shop, where you had picked up more hours as of late, and report that Jason was improving; slowly, but it was clear.
You found out more about him from your own research; the county coroner had records of one Jason Todd on file, the cemetery plot visible from the road. You spoke to your grandmother about your discoveries, and she hummed knowingly as stirred a pot of bubbling ooze.
“Necromancy is a dangerous magic, (Y/N),” she clucked, adding some snails to the pot that overflowed with a snap. “No wonder why he is hurting so. You are a good child for helping him. I know it is not easy.”
It certainly wasn’t. Some days, you couldn’t overcome Jason’s anger; it caused migraines that forced you into bed, lights off and headphones on, no music playing but on your ears to block the noise. No amount of medicine cured it; they only abated when Jason settled, or you had enough clarity to calm his emotions.
It happened one night, after you locked the shop and were trotting home and passing an alley, that you were struck blind by a migraine, gasping and groaning as it took you to your knees at the edge of the alley. Through stilted eyes you saw the newest vigilante in town pummeling a thug without mercy, your hazy vision imagining Jason’s anger appearing very similar to his. You pushed with what you had, trying to calm it, and the vigilante spun, seeing you hung over on the bricks as you attempted to right your orientation.
The pain abated, without more of your help; it had never done that before. You looked up to see the Hood dropping the man to the ground; he didn’t approach you, just stared, before scrambling up the fire escape to the roof tops. Shaking your head, you shuffled to your feet and made it home, sighing.
The next time you walked home from the shop, Jason was across the street.
You froze, keys jingling in your hand, as you stared at his looming form across the street. He didn’t approach, and you could feel how unsure he was, so you took a chance. Looking both ways, you clutched your bag to your chest as you crossed the busy street, coming to rest carefully next to Jason. He was tense and shy under your gaze, and you breathed out with a smile, eyes fluttering. You turned, beginning to walk home; Jason hung behind you, following uneasily.
About a quarter of a mile, you turned to him, Jason looking like he had been caught trespassing. You shrugged at him. “You can walk next to me, you know.”
Quick steps as he did so, trotting next to you the entire walk back. No words were spoken between the two of you, and as you reached your apartment door you turned to him, seeing Jason in the light for the first time in months. He looked healthier, like his brother had reported. Still haunted, you sensed, but getting better. You were glad, happy and thankful.
“That; what is that?” he breathed, hand flying to his chest.
“Jason,” you hushed, like you were speaking a secret only meant for the two of you. “That’s hope.”
He blinked, before a beautiful smile spread over his face. “I…forgot what that felt like.”
He came around more often after that night, starting off slow. Walking you home after your shift, appearing at the same coffee shop you frequented, passing by the store for a quick wave. You always reciprocated, and as time went on Jason came closer to you, sitting to have coffee or coming to hang in the store with you. His mind slowly, surely, got quieter and more calm, only with slight outbursts now that didn’t incapacitate you as bad as his older bouts.
You were both in the store one day, you attempting to sweep up some glittering dust from the floor, Jason leaning against the counter, bracelet glinting in the light as he tinkered with his helmet. He watched you, and you paused as he slipped in his thoughts, a sense of fondness leaking through your connection.
“I never knew you felt like that, Jason. Could’ve fooled me,” you teased, and he coughed, pulling his hood up over his face and turning away. You laughed, patting his shoulder as you went behind the counter, organizing some jars. Pausing, a thought came to you, and you took a chance in voicing it. “Hey, what made you come back? You didn’t seem to want anything to do with me that first day.”
He shifted, uncomfortable. “…Don’t laugh, okay?”
Growing serious, you turned to him, face even. “Never.”
“That day in the alley, when I saw you crumple to the ground with that migraine, I realized just how much my anger and rage could hurt someone,” he started, slow but sure. “You didn’t move for minutes after you collapsed, (Y/N). I thought…I thought I killed you. As soon as I felt that concern for you, though… you got up. You were okay. And you made me realized that there was more to living than just anger.”
“When I’m with you, like… the closer I am, everything is quiet,” he whispered. “All the negativity, all the dismay…damn, just your presence alone eases it. It’s nice. It’s more than I deserve.”
“You deserve the world, Jason Todd,” you swore, swiping at your eyes, memories of rough conversations about his past coming to your mind. You couldn’t help the smile beaming from your face, and you directed it to him. Jason rolled his eyes, turning and grumbling, but you could feel the affection he had for you, bracelet warm against your wrist. You leaned against the counter, arms crossed underneath you, looking up at him.
“Hey,” you called softly. He looked down at you. “As long as you need me, I’ll be here, okay? No matter what.”
It was like a spring unwound in Jason; he breathed out, muscles loosening, a lopsided smirk over his face as he leaned against the counter. He looked at you, head on, before raising a fist up to your level. “I’m going to hold you to that, (Y/N).”
You bumped your fist against his, the two of you watching as starcatchers painted prisms across the shop as the daylight faded into a night that didn’t seem so dark anymore.
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