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James, jumping onto the Gryffindor table, shouting at the top of his lungs: LILY EVANS, WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME?!
Lily, rolling her eyes: Sure, James.
James, getting off the table: You'll come around-
James, getting back on the table: WAIT- SURE?!
Lily, trying not to smile: Yes, James.
James, staring wide-eyed at Lily: ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?!
Remus and Sirius: No, but I am.
Me with every single television show on the first episode...
Me: Their best friends...
Me: Actually...
Me: *whispers* OTP...
Me: *clasps hands over mouth*
Me: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?!!!
If you don't go out with me, I'll unfold all your socks!
Sirius Black, fifth year to Remus Lupin
Do I miss playing Draco Malfoy? I am Draco Malfoy.
Tom Felton, probably
The Giver film
Alright, I loved the book âThe Giverâ by Lois Lowry. Sheâs a great author.
But the movie sucked. Because...
1. Jonas is supposed to be 12 years old and in the movie heâs like 16.
2. After Sameness the entire Community should be the same skin color, according to the book, but there were a lot of different races.
3. Fiona became a Caretaker of the Old, not a Nurturer.
4. Asher was Guardian of Recreation, not a Drone Pilot.
5. There is no romantic plot between Fiona and Jonas in the book. They are best-friends.
6. Itâs a pill not an injection.
7. All the drama between Fiona and Jonas is stupid.Â
8. His Mother wasnât a terrible person. In the book, she was really sweet.
9. The drama with Fiona being released was not in the book. Fiona was not a very important character.
10. There was no bad guy in the book.
11. The Giver never gave Jonas the memory of his daughter, or music.
12. Lily is an Eight not a Nine.
13. Gabriel is blonde.
I hope one day, God walks into a church, smacks the bible out of someoneâs hand and yells âTHATâS NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!!!âÂ
My fucking savage history teacher...
My history teacher set up groups for us to work in and the boys were complaining that they got grouped with girls. And he was like:
âIf you have any complaints you can put them here. *picks up garbage can* And the janitor will be pleased to not read them.â
Meanwhile at Malfoy Manor...
Draco: I HATE POTTER SO MUCH! I HATE THAT HE'S BETTER THAN ME AT QUIDITCH! I HATE HOW HE USES HIS BEAUTIFUL HANDS TO CATCH THE STUPID SNITCH EVERY GAME!
Lucius: *chokes on his tea*
Draco: HIS BEAUTIFUL HANDS THAT WOULD A HELL OF A LOT BETTER AROUND MY DI-
Lucius: Draco Lucius Malfoy!
Draco: What? What did I say?
Narcissa: *Smirks into her tea* *low-key ships it*
Draco: Alright. Let's try something.
Draco: Accio soulmate!
*Harry comes flying into the Slytherin boys' dorm on his broomstick, looking terrified*
Draco: Potter?!
Harry: Malfoy! What did you do?! I was in the middle of Quiditch practice!
Draco:
Draco:Oh...
Draco: OH!
My dad just came to my room and handed me a Lego box. I took it and immediately felt the weight of it in my hands.
âDad...Is my cat in here?â
My dad ran off down the hallway giggling like a little girl.
When I opened the box my cat popped out like everything was normal and trotted off.
and i just...
Yesterday at Youth Group...
Toilet: *Overflows for the umpteenth time*
Me: *To myself* Not again.
Me: *runs out of the stall and grabs my friends hand*
Me: Hermione! Come with me! We must find Mr. Filch. Moaning Myrtle is after me again.
Me and Friend: *Walking down the hallway when this redheaded kid comes up to us*
Him: Where are you two going?
Me: Ron! Come with us. We're going to find Mr. Filch. Moaning Myrtle just will not leave us alone!
If your biggest fear was a boggart, what would your boggart turn into?
Mom: There is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay. Unless you're hiding it and pretending to be straight.
Me: (mumbles sadly) Like Dean Winchester.
Mom: Exactly.
When you figure it out...