13. How do you speak about others when they’re not around?
“I try to be fair. That said, I’m not above venting with a bit of flair if someone’s been awful. But I don’t say anything I wouldn’t stand by. My honesty doesn’t take a lunch break.”
23. What is the most interesting white lie you’ve told?
“That the drinks at my bar are just that good. Muggles think it’s artisanal bitters and charm; they don’t know it’s actual charm. Magical enhancement—tiny tweaks. No harm, no foul.”
33. Have you stopped trying to control things yet?
“I’ve never been someone who needs to control others — honestly, I hate when people try to control me. But I do like to control how I show up in the world. I manage the edges, keep the compartments of my life tidy so they don’t bleed too much into each other. It’s not about secrecy, exactly — it’s more about survival. My whole life, I’ve had one foot in and one foot out of every world I belong to. And that balance? That illusion of having a handle on it all? It’s a kind of control I haven’t quite let go of. But part of me knows… eventually, I’ll have to.”
63. What is one fear that you’d be ashamed of your friends knowing about?
“That deep down, I wonder if I’ll always feel a little... split. Like I’ll never fully belong in either world. It’s easier to act like I’m above it all than admit how much I want to feel at home somewhere.”
83. How often do you take responsibility for other people’s crappy behavior?
“Outside my family? Almost never. If someone’s out of line, I’ll call it what it is. I don’t babysit egos. But when it’s my family... I don't take the blame, but I protect it. I cover, smooth it over, change the subject, take the edge off the truth. I’m not sure if it’s loyalty or habit—or maybe I’m just not ready to admit how much it still matters to me. I haven’t let myself belong fully to either world, so I sit in the space between and try to make it all make sense. Some days, it feels like a choice. Most days, it feels like survival.”
✧ Cara O'Donnell (Macdonald)
13. How do you speak about others when they’re not around?
"If I love you, I’ll guard your name like it’s breakable. If you’ve hurt me, I go quiet. Not out of grace — out of fear I’ll say something I can’t take back. My silence isn’t forgiveness. It’s restraint."
23. What is the most interesting white lie you’ve told?
"I’ve said I was tired when I was shattered. I’ve said I was fine when I was furious. The lies I tell aren’t clever — they’re camouflage. A way to survive conversations I’m not ready to have."
33. Have you stopped trying to control things yet?
"I’ve never really had control. But I crave it. I daydream about what it would feel like — to be certain, to be steady, to not always be reacting. I build emotional contingency plans in my head like that makes me safer. It doesn’t. But it lets me pretend I’m not at the mercy of everything I can’t hold still."
63. What is one fear that you’d be ashamed of your friends knowing about?
"That being left isn’t my biggest fear — being pitied is. I’d rather someone walk away than stay just because they feel bad for me. I want to be chosen, not tolerated. And sometimes, I push people just hard enough that I don’t have to find out which one it is."
83. How often do you take responsibility for other people’s crappy behavior?
"Too often. I rewrite the story in their favor, every time. I’ll carry the weight of what they did if it means I don’t have to face the fact that they meant to do it. If it’s my fault, maybe there’s still a way to fix it. That lie is easier to live with than the truth."