all of the texts honestly :3c
send ✆ for a morning text
[ txt; sunshine ] called ahead and got a table for us at ihop if you decide to get out of bed [ txt; sunshine ] i hope i actually get to spend this morning with you, since you bailed the last time. i’d like to think that i’m more important than your bed ):<
[ txt; sunshine ] next time he even breathes in your direction, i’m going to shove a cactus up his ass [ txt; sunshine ] i’m not joking, it’ll go so far up he’ll have thorns poking out of his fucking eye sockets
[ txt; sunshine ] THERE’S A HUGE-ASS FUCKING SQUIRREL IN THE LIVING ROOM [ txt; sunshine ] WE’VE BEEN HAVING A YODELING CONTEST FOR THE PAST HOUR [ txt; sunshine ] SHIT’S INTENSE MAN, I THINK I PISSED ON HIS NUTS
[ txt; sunshine ] there’s this fucking prick who wrote something on my cousin’s facebook [ txt; sunshine ] i wonder if they’re talking about the thing that happened yesterday. she got herself balls deep into that bullshit
send ⁇ for a worried text
[ txt; sunshine ] you’re not the same when you don’t smile, it kinda puts me on edge [ txt; sunshine ] you’ve been pretty quiet lately too, where’s that spark? [ txt; sunshine ] let’s remedy that, i’m bringing chinese and white chicks.
send ♣ for a text not meant for you
[ txt; sunshine ] you got the stuff? i cleared out my garage to stash it. [ txt; sunshine ] hopefully jason won’t fuck us over this time, i lost some serious cash. he’s lucky i didn’t pop his ass. [ txt; sunshine ] SHIT. sorry, ignore all that
[ txt; sunrise ] got a problem with me? [ txt; sunrise ] go stand in line with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck.
send √ for a long-winded confession text
[ txt; sunshine ] i really like the way your smile manages to make my heart melt, or the way your face lights up when you get passionate about something. the only thing that makes my heart melt more is the look you give me when we’re alone – like i’m the only one that exists, and like you’re absolutely in love with me. [ txt; sunshine ] it’s flattering (;
send ☠ for a misguided advice text
[ txt; sunshine ] if he pisses you off so much, you should just tear him a new anus. [ txt; sunshine ] or, on second thought, just mutilate his genitals. having a new anus gives him another opening for bringing out more bullshit.
send ☢ for a desperate text
[ txt; sunshine ] listen, i’ve had a serious problem since i saw you in that dress earlier [ txt; sunshine ] it’s totally not fucking fair, you gotta come and fix that shit right now [ txt; sunshine ] i’ll do anything, just come here, i’ve been wanting you all day
send ☼ for a congratulatory text
[ txt; sunshine ] dude, that’s fucking awesome! you’ve been dying to get into that school forever [ txt; sunshine ] i knew you could do it, you’re too smart for them to want to give you the red slip.
send ✘ for a text that should never have been sent
[ txt; sunshine ] sometimes i wonder what it is you even see in me. i’m just disgusting, i ask for too much and i hardly give you anything back in return. you’re the most amazing person, you could have the world; i don’t get it. you could have anyone you want, and you settled for trash like me. [ txt; sunshine ] shit, you weren’t supposed to get that. sorry, forget i said anything.