hi to anyone who comes across this blog; I'm not really too sure how this blogging stuff works but I've been a long time reader on here and thought I’d try my hand at writing!
I’m happy to write any requests anyone has for groups inc: BTS, Stray Kids, Got7 and Monsta X; but I’ll also write some stuff off my own back to get started!
general rules:
happy to write any kind of content such as : angst, suggestive and fluff- if you reaaaally would like a smut (18+) writing; I’ll try my best *can’t promise* :)
groups you can request: BTS, Stray Kids, Got7 and Monsta X
please be specific on who you’d like me to write about, the scenario as well as pronouns etc you would like it to be involving, everyone is welcome here!
please also note that all fanfics are done in good humour, I’m just doing this for fun so I hope you all enjoy! any and all feedback is welcome, the interaction is sooo appreciated!
synopsis : life has to go back to normal for y/n, breakup or not. when jb sees y/n getting attention from another male idol it touches a nerve. he's desperate to talk to her, will she listen or has he ruined it for good?
the next few days were insufferable. the demand to go back to normal life while your world is in a state of limbo is something you couldn’t fathom. you hadn’t heard from jb in days but the life of an idol waits for no one. you had rehearsals all morning, meetings in the afternoon, evening rehearsals. recordings the next day, guest appearances on radio shows to talk about your recent win. all of which had to be done with a smile. and for the first time in a long time, you had no reason to smile. how could you? initially all you were doing was checking your phone, his activity on instagram, the boys instagrams. radio silence. nothing. like he’d just disappeared from social media. leaving you to make your own scenarios with no confirmation. was he doing the same? checking your instagram 40 times a day, reading old texts? probably not.
day 5 and no message from jb. the compulsive need to check your phone was lessening, possibly from the new album you were recording being all consuming, or maybe you had just got tired of the disappointment. the girls tried to keep you distracted partly because the job demanded it but mostly because they hated seeing you like this. they’d show you funny tiktoks, tweets from Roses, anything to make you smile. you didn't want to let them down, it wasn’t their fault that your love life was turning to shit before your very eyes. they worked so hard to make this dream come true, they deserve this success more than anyone. so you'd put on a face for them. for as long as you had to.
‘what’s the schedule for tomorrow?’ Ara said as she wiped off her makeup. the dorm was the only safe haven, the walls of the room harboured all of the groups secrets. you'd all talk about your families, your dreams, crushes, fears. you trusted the girls with your life and visa versa. ‘we have rehearsals tomorrow at 8am, then meeting with wardrobe for our dance practice video, then Weekly Idol dance battle again’ fuck. ‘I thought we weren’t going to that?’ Mina questioned. my thoughts exactly! ‘they changed the time so we could record for album, our manager sent the email about it last week..’ Ara replied, looking between you and Mina. ‘and that ladies and gentlemen, is why I should be checking my phone..’ you thought. you stayed staring at your hands nervously gripping each other. ‘you’re going to have to face him at some point y/n’ Ara said looking at you, her eyes soft and worried. you nodded sheepishly, knowing it was true. ‘we will all be there.. we have your back’ Mina said rubbing her hand on your back. ‘just pretend he's not there, he doesn’t deserve your attention after he did that’ she continued. you wanted to agree, he didn’t deserve your attention.. but all you wanted was for him to give you his attention. ‘we’d never leave you to eat noodles on your own..’ Ara said placing her hand on your knee, causing everyone to laugh. you knew this would be so much harder if you didn't have your friends with you.
the hours between going to sleep and waking up are never long enough but when you have a day like this today, it really didn’t feel long enough. you did what you had to do, you practiced the routines for your new album, you went to the wardrobe fitting. granted that was always your favourite thing to do even when you didn’t feel up to it. they'd picked out some outfits for your dance practice filming as well as something for Weekly Idol consisting of baggy jeans, strapless black top and arm warmers. very you. there was a bustle in the dressing room from the members and staff, all excited to see you all in your outfits. you fished your phone out of your bag while everyone was still getting ready, you opened Instagram to see Jackson had uploaded a story. you hesitantly pressed to view it, as expected it was a video of bambam dancing- you smiled, you missed hanging out with them. your eyes narrowed, in the back you could see him. it was jb standing with a girl. could be completely innocent you thought. but the big smile plastered on his face said otherwise. you didn’t recognise her, she didn’t look like staff, or from a group that was on the show.. your mind was running wild. was this the real reason he broke it off? or is she giving him the free relationship he wanted? the one you couldn’t? 6 months for what? your mood switched, the feeling of dread turned to drive. you were going to weekly idol, and you were going to show him that you didn’t care. he didn’t care to message you, you didn’t care to be in the same room as him. no more crying over this man.
you all arrived on set, a lot of the groups were already there. as per contracts you weren’t allowed to mingle with other groups prior to filming so you were lead to your designated green room. the girls had all seen the instagram story and had the same reaction; who was she? what’s going on? all of which you'd already tried to answer yourself but couldn’t. ‘girls whatever we think, we act professional. agreed?’ Mina said casting a stern look between all of us. ‘is a slap professional?’ Ara laughed. ‘no I agree, I don’t care what he's doing. we do this for Roses. yes?’ you chime in, almost believing your own words. before anyone could say another word a man clutching a clip board in one hand a coffee in the other entered the room. ‘right ladies we are ready for you’ he said using his clipboard to motion us out the room. with one last look in the mirror we all headed out in single file in true ‘one of us has been betrayed fashion.’
as we enter the main studio you see that most of the other groups have already been brought through and were waiting. the desperation to look round the room and find him was overwhelming, but you kept your eye line straight ahead, following the lead. you all took your seats, you sat on the end. the chatter in the room made it much more bearable this time. everyone seems a lot less nervous. you feel a gentle tap on the shoulder, you look over to see Hyunjin of Stay Kids smiling back at you. it catches the rest of Ro5es attention along with Stray Kids and you greet each other with a smile and bow amongst some low chatter and pleasantries. ‘we wanted to catch you all after the MNET awards, you were amazing’ Bangchan says on the behalf of the group. ‘oh thank you, it was a crazy night, we crashed straight away’ Ara laughed, the rest of us just nodding along. your eyes revert back to Hyunjin who's eyes hadn’t left yours. immediately looking back to bangchan who was still making conversation with the rest of the girls ‘wait you’re still living in the dorm?’ Felix interrupts. no idea how this came up? ‘yeah but we are looking for apartments but no luck so far’ Mina continues. ‘well hyunjin is wanting to move out of his, you should check it out, its not far from YG’ Bangchan says motioning to Hyuinjin to looked like he had only just tuned into the conversation. ‘right, yeah I am. come by anytime’ he said sharing his gaze between the girls until he stops on you. this look lasted not long, but enough time for you to notice in you peripheral a figure looking over at you. your eyes re focus on the figure. jb. how long had he been looking at you? when did he even get here? was he there the whole time? his face looked serious, more serious than you'd ever seen. even when he was breaking up with you. and that's saying something..
your thoughts were interrupted by the host clapping to get everyones attention. the once chattering voices turned into a low lull and then silence, all focus being pulled to the same point. the introductions and plan for the show might as well have not been said, you couldn’t focus.. you hadn’t seen jb in a week, hadn’t heard from him since you broke up. could you even say you broke up, were you ever together really? ‘not now’ you thought to yourself. snapping back your focus as the hosts do their introductions to the cameras and one by one the groups around us do their signature intros garnering a clap from the spectators and groups alike. working their way round the room until it was our turn, you stand up in unison and smile and wave at the camera tunefully saying our intro. you sheepishly take your seat and cast a low look over to where the tension resides. over to jb, who's eyes were sharp and serious. even when doing the got7 intro, his demeanour never changed. you wanted the ground to swallow you whole, this was painful. was he going to look furious the whole time? at what? ‘I should be the angry one’ you thought to yourself.
the games commenced, one by one a song by another group present started playing- a member from each of the remaining groups scrambling to the centre of the room to complete the dance (hysterically) to gain points. The room would erupt into laughter every time, especially when the boy groups would put on their best performance of the girls’ songs. no matter how funny you thought it was, you couldn't help but cast a look over to jb every now and again, never meeting his eye line. he was avoiding you. obviously too. which was only frustrating you more and more.
‘okay! good job everyone, I don't think we’ve ever had a group execute ‘POP’ quite like that, well done Felix’ the host laughed, being echoed by the rest of Stray Kids. ‘RO5ES, you guys are working on your first album, can you show us anything you've been working on?’ the host queried, looking between you all as you smiled. ‘we’ve just recorded our dance practice for one of our songs, we’d love to show you that!’ Ara beamed, clasping her hands together. ‘OH!! yes yes yes, come on!’ the other host corralled. one by one you all began to stand up and take your formations, this was the first time you'd performed it in front of anyone who wasn’t staff or you manager. and in front of other professionals seemed like the worst possible audience to perform in front of. while you desperately tried to rationalise your thoughts the music began to play, the intro slowly building up until it was time. the energy of the song was stronger than your debut single, it made you all feel powerful. Mina started off the song, her vocals crisp and clean coupled with her hard hitting dancing. the song felt like mere seconds before it was your turn to begin the chorus. you hitched your breath, a million thoughts running through your mind all in a second. ‘is he watching? what's he thinking? why wouldn't he look at me?’ but there was no time to conclude an answer, you began to sing the chorus as the girls gathered round you in formation waiting for the dance break. if you were going to perform any song today, thank god it was this one. you needed some strength here.
a roar of applause and cheers from the surrounding groups filled the room as you finished in your positions. you made your looks at the camera before returning to your clear exhaustion. you all thanked everyone and took your seats. ‘wow wow! amazing!’ one host said, his mouth agape. ‘yes amazing, what did you all think?’ he said turning our attention to the groups behind us. ‘I mean it was incredible, you all work so well together!’ Bangchan began, followed by Felix ‘we loved it, couldn't stop watching’ he said nudging Hyunjin who looked like someone had just been brought back from the dead before his very eyes. snapping back to, he laughed ‘yes very good’ causing the room to erupt with laughing at his bland statement contradicting the look on his face seconds ago. ‘got7 you've been doing this for a long time, have you ever seen a performance like that?’ the second host questioned. they all looked at each other for a second, deciding who was going to speak. finally after what felt like hours of deliberation, Jackson spoke up. ‘yeah we loved it, especially this bit’ he said as he leapt out his chair and threw his arm over jb’s shoulder and rolled his body down to his feet causing a loud laugh from the rest of the boys. but all you could look at was jb, his face cold looking and sharp. his eyes move over to you, your body goes cold. how does he have that effect with only his eyes. Jackson returns to his seat as the room mellows down again. you're still looking at him, his gaze has returned to the camera then down at his feet. you can't work out what he's thinking, he doesn’t give much away as it is.. but now you really have no idea.
‘AND CUT! okay thank you everyone, good job today!’ he director shouts. you look back at the girls, they’re already looking at you. ‘ignore him, what's his problem?’ Ara retorts. she's mad. as are you. ‘yeah ignore him. but should we take a look at Hyunjin’s apartment? please! I can't live in that tiny dorm any longer. my clothes need their own room!’ Mina pleaded, pulling you all over to where Stray Kids are still sat. the boys attention turns to you all awkwardly stood in front of them. ‘um, would you mind us looking at your apartment?’ Mina begins. hyunjin looks like his desperately trying to find his words. ‘um yeah! yeah let me get your numbers and we can sort something out!’ he said pulling his phone out his back pocked. you all do the same, opening up your contacts and typing in his number. before you could type his number in he pulls your phone out your hand and into his. you look behind you, the girls are all facing away whispering about their schedule and when this is going to happen. the same with the boys, no one seems to be watching. he finishes typing and swings the phone back to face you, looking down at you with a low stare. your eyes dart between his left and right, trying to never let them settle. ‘I'll text you’ he said releasing the phone back into your hand. ‘yeah okay just let us know..’ you said nervously. ‘no. ill text you.’ he said, emphasising the you. oh. you take a step back, garnering the girls attention. ‘thank you, see you later’ Mina said, initiating a bow from us and them. hyunjin didn't bow, his eyes were locked on yours.
as you turn around you begin to relax. shit that was tense. the girls are walking ahead of you, clearly excited that they firstly; might have found an apartment. secondly; that they just got hyunjin from Stray Kids number. they're excitement turning them into little school girls. you looked down at your phone as you followed them a few steps behind. your contacts were already open. the forefront page ‘hyunjin x’ so that's what he was doing.. before you could even lock your phone you we spun in the opposite direction and pushed into a closing door. your eyes not knowing where you were, desperately trying to relocate. the grip on your arm loosened allowing you to relax a little, you lifted your head up to see a very stern jb looking back at you. your heart sank, he was so close. immediately you were taken back to that day at the restaurant. you hadn’t seen that look anywhere else. and with that look came upset and heartache. what did he want?
‘you enjoying yourself?’ he questioned, his eyes so intimidating it would make a grown man question himself. his tone didn’t have the same positivity as the words he was saying.. it was a loaded question. ‘what do you mean?’ you replied, very quietly. like that fear had made that the loudest you could speak. his gaze narrowed, like he was shocked at what you said. you braced yourself, not knowing what he was going to say or do. ‘we broke up a week ago and you're getting someone else’s number in front of me. do you think that's funny?’ he said, his voice getting slightly louder. you furrowed your brow in confusion, you knew that wasn’t what was happening, so how could he think that? ‘we are going to view his apartment! he's moving. jb are you serious?!’ you reply, getting equally as frustrated. ‘you think im stupid? he was staring at you all day, you think he wants you to come and view his apartment? are you that stupid?’ he retorted. that hurt.. he’d never insulted you before. your anger disbursed into hurt, plastering a look of disappointment onto your face. ‘thanks jb. are you done now?’ you said mustering up everything inside of you to stay calm. he took a step back running his hands through his hair before placing his hands in his pockets. ‘what are you doing..?’ he questions, his tone calmer. ‘im working jb, im trying to work without this being a problem but you're making it really fucking hard when youre staring at me all the time, dragging me into room to shout at me for stuff I haven’t even done!’ you say starting to get angry again. ‘y/n you're acting like this has been easy for me. I hate seeing you. I hate seeing you and knowing that even afterwards I can't see you’ he says, eyes starting to get tearful. ‘you ended it with me! what do you expect me to do! Im not begging for you back when you ended it!’ you begin to raise your voice. jb’s attention turns to the door.. footsteps. ‘shit’ he whispers. you hear them too. they're getting closer.
jb strides towards you, grabbing your arm with one hand and clasping his other over your mouth as he drags your over to the other side of the room. quickly pulling open a cupboard door and backing your stunned body into it and closing it behind you. your once illuminated faces now engulfed in darkness, only the light of the room coming through the crack in the door. he's looking through the gap, eyes intensely locked on what's going on outside. you should have been scared. you too should have been looking out there. but your eyes were locked on the silhouette of his face, the tip of his nose gaining most of the light, just enough hitting the colour of his eyes and the outline of his lips. his breathing didn’t seem phased, meanwhile yours felt low and laboured. granted his hand was still over your mouth but the fact that you were now in a very tightly confined space with jb was probably the main factor. the footsteps had reached a stop. his eyes flicked back to you, like he was trying to figure out if you were thinking the same thing as him. if it was ‘oh fuck’ then yes, yes you were. the handle of the office door began to turn downwards followed by the door opening fully. once again... oh fuck. ‘did I leave the lights on?’ you heard a familiar voice say. it was the director from earlier. without a second thought he flicked them off and closed the door. earning a sigh of relief from both you and jb. he released his hand from your mouth and let in trail down your shoulder a touch. you couldn’t tell if that was intentional or if the lack of space was just really doing you a favour.
the silence continued. this time in complete darkness. ‘so.. should we get out?’ you whisper. you can feel him in front of you, his tall frame over you making your knees feel like they could buckle at any given moment. ‘we could.. or’ he finally said, trailing of his words as you felt the air between you two close. his hands once again returning to your face, cupping it delicately. his lips met yours as you both took and euphoric breath in. your arms trail up his front to reach his neck and clasp them behind his head. your bodies and mouths so in sync with each other moving in perfect time. letting him take the lead was usually how it went, but this kiss felt different. it was still filled with anger and betrayal. progressively getting more and more heated, within an instant he lifted you up; wrapping your legs around him, gripping onto the door for stability. he had one hand wrapped around your waist and the other under your legs. dangerous territory. how did you go from arguing to this? and if every argument was going to end like this, you'd never say sorry. the fury and passion of the kiss turned to a tender more meaningful moment. slow and careful. he began to lower you down, finding your feet on the ground again, adjusting your connection to the new height. gently he pulls away, you didn’t want it to be over. if it was over there was a risk of going back to how this were. him ignoring you. you being broken and putting on a face. ‘that was close..’ he uttered between breaths. you'd forgotten that someone almost found you two. you wondered if he was referring to that or if something else was too close. because if so.. you felt the same. ‘oh yeah.. too close’ you said, delicately adjusting your top. ‘that too..’ he whispered, laughing slightly. great minds think alike.
you chucked back, knowing full well what he was thinking about. silence fell on your little cupboard of safety. seconds felt like an age. you slowly pushed the cupboard door open, letting in what little light was in the room into the small space. you stepped out into the cooler air- it had got hot in there. you sat down on one of the tables that centred the room. jb limply took his seat on the table opposite. you just stared at each other, like you'd already exchanged all your words. ‘I should get back; the girls will be wondering where I've got to’ you said in a whisper, as though you were still in the cupboard. ‘I told the boys to keep them busy..’ he said with an obnoxious smirk on his face. he knows all too well what he's doing.
‘so.. will you see me tomorrow?’ he continued, like he was dying to ask this question all along. you hesitated for a moment. ‘to talk about what?’ you questioned, softly. ‘I don't care if its a secret or public, I can't be without you..’ he says looking long into your eyes. earning a small smile from you, reflecting on his face. you push yourself off the table and lazily walk over to him, arms swinging down by your sides; playfully avoiding eye contact. you stop a few feet away from him, teasing the distance. he lets out a humorous puff of air from his nose, looking at you like you're taunting him. he reaches out and grabs your waist with both of his hands and pulls you into the space between his legs quicker than you can even think. the space between you is resemblant of the cupboard, even in this big space you feel the air is tight. ‘don't mess with me’ he said, low and sultry. ‘id never’ you respond, closing the distance between your lips for a few seconds. never touching. a his eyes begin to close, preparing to ease himself into the kiss; you quickly pull out his light grip of your hips and open the door; closing it behind you. jb opens his eyes quickly, seeing you on the other side of the door. his arms still stuck in the position he was holding you in but now a funny betrayed look plastered on his face. you'd never felt so smug, leaving him sat there. you raise your hand and give him a little wave before turning heels and walking back to the dressing room.
you’ll see him tomorrow.
////
im back! sorry its been so long, life has been so busy this year. wasn’t really in the headspace to write for a long time, but I really enjoyed writing this. hope you all enjoyed too!
lmk if there's anything else you'd like me to write in-between parts <3
synopsis: following part 1, y/n is feeling the pressure of their secret relationship. jb gives her an ultimatum; her dream of being an idol or the love of her life.
Lifting your now soggy face from Ara’s arm, earning a chuckle from the rest of the members. ‘You need to fix yourself before you see him though, you don’t exactly look how you did at the show.’ Mina laughed patting the back of your head. laughing at their concerned faces you all made your way to the dorm; where the girls helped you choose and outfit and fix the disaster that was your face. after far too long of trying on and discarding outfits, you'd settled on a look. grabbing your phone and opening up your text log with jb, you began to type.
‘are you busy?’ a good start
‘I'm just finishing rehearsals, come by JYP and we can go to mine’ he replied quickly
‘okay on my way’ the thought of meeting him still made you nervous, even more so now your cover almost got blown. gathering your bag and things you made your way out the door; wondering if this was a good idea. was it?
you couldn’t tell if it was just you being paranoid or what, but it felt like everyone was staring at you. just for a second sometimes, other times for a while, even double takes. you knew you weren’t that well know. so what was it? you stood across the street from JYP, a safer distance as it was still daylight. the paranoia was growing inside you, as other trainees came out the building you couldn’t help but avert your gaze every time the door opened. this was really messing with you. finally you broke, you couldn’t do it. it was broad daylight, hours after an article about you and jb being seen together was released, now you were stood outside his company. this was the worst idea ever. quickly turning on your heels and taking lengthy strides in the direction of home before you could change your mind.
‘y/n!’ you heard a familiar voice behind you
not even turning around you carried on walking, pretending to have not heard it.
‘Y/N!’ the voice was louder this time. knowing exactly who it was, but you couldn’t turn round. it was like your body wouldn't let you. keep walking. the voice had now turned into foot steps, quickening and right behind you.
‘hey hey hey’ he said grabbing your arm, stopping you dead in your tracks and spinning you round to face him. it was jb, for the first time ever, you didn’t feel excited to see him. it was now fear.
‘what’re you doing? what's wrong?’ he said now sounding worried.
‘can we not do this here’ you whispered, seeing that his shouting had caught the attention of some other trainees close by.
‘okay fine..’ he said, almost angry.
he grabbed your arm and pulled you down the street. your legs barely keeping up with his long strides. before long you'd made it to his apartment, he aggressively punched in the key code and pushed the door open. walking in front of you and throwing his bag down to the side; your small frame feeling even smaller in his big apartment.
‘so what's going on?’ he questioned, arms crossed over his chest.
‘nothing.. I just didn’t think it was a good idea to be outside your company after last night’ you murmured; head down, scared to meet his gaze. jb let out a chuckling sigh clearly amused by what you said.
‘y/n I know this is all new to you, but I don't care what anyone has to say about it. YG put out a statement and so did JYP, its all fixed’ he said placing his hands on your shoulders.
‘it doesn’t feel fixed, I’m so scared we are going to get caught. I don't want this to end, but I also don’t want to mess it up for the other members or you’ you whimpered, tears now filling your eyes; it had finally hit you. without hesitation, jb pulled you into his chest. one hand on your back and the other gently stroking your head. leaning down his face to meet the top of your head.
‘I'm not going anywhere, we’re going to be okay’ he whispered, gently kissing the top of your head. feeling his heart beat against his chest, rhythmically coupled with his deep breathing. you wanted to stay in this moment forever, the sincerity in his voice just made all of the worries you had melt away.
‘come on, let’s get some food. I'm starving’ he said, patting you gently on the back. raising your head from his chest to meet his gaze. his hand gently wiping tears from your face, his touching bringing comfort to you once again. now a sniffly mess, you brushed your hair out your face as he picked up his bag, taking your hand in his. stepping out into the street with your hands together felt safe, like you didn’t care who saw you.
‘lets go downtown, I know a great place. they don’t snitch so no one will know.’ jb said softly, making sure you were okay. you nodded in agreement as his thumb gently rubbed your hand. worries melting away.
the walk was about 10 minutes, down empty streets, it was perfect. you could finally walk together without question or worry. eventually, you came to a little restaurant, quaint and isolated. but just as delicious looking as those on the main streets. opening the door, you were met by a small very smiley woman who ran towards jb and engulfed his face into his hands.
‘aw look at you! you’ve gotten so much skinnier, we will fix that!’ she cooed with a motherly tone. ‘and who’s this?’ she queried, her voice still soft. making the question sound more genuine than an attack. you shyly stood behind him still nervous as f.
‘ah this is y/n, y/n this is Suha, me and the boys used to come here a lot, she makes the best food.’ he smiled as the motherly figure blushed.
‘we don’t ask questions here, we just make good food for my boys’ she retorted, picking up his hand and patting it a few times. ‘sit sit, I'll bring your usual, y/n what would you like my love’ she continued.
‘oh um, whatever jb is having’ you replied awkwardly. ‘2 minutes’ she said waving her hands in the air.
you both took a seat in the window, looking out onto the quiet street. you could feel jb’s eyes lingering over you, but you couldn’t bare to make eye contact with him. your eyes wouldn't move. his soft big hand trailed over yours that sat delicately on the table. earning a gaze in his direction. his face completely blank, expressionless.
‘what’s wrong?’ you questioned, you'd never seen him look this blank before. he let out a sharp breath as his lip curled to form a little smile.
‘nothing... you look tired’ he said quietly. you chuckled, knowing he was right.
‘yeah the last few days have been a lot. I feel okay though.. what about you?’
you replied, brushing your hair out your face with the one free hand you had. he shrugged. you furrowed your brow, wondering what he was hiding.
‘jb, what's wrong?’ you continued to press, taking your other hand and joining it with jb’s.
‘I know you’re finding this hard, I don't want that for you. its so early in your career. I don't want to ruin this for you’ he confessed.
you took in all he was saying, you knew he meant well and cared for you. ‘it is hard. but I'm okay. really I am. this is all just very new.’ you said gripping his hands tighter and tighter.
‘I just don't want this to become a chore for you. I love seeing you, but I don't love seeing you stressed.’ he continued.
you sighed, you never really thought about how much this was affecting him. you'd been selfish to think this was only hard for you. ‘it’ll calm down, just with what happened at the awards it blew up.’ you retorted, trying to stay calm.
‘what if it doesn’t though, this is what happens. everything is calm, we carry on sneaking around, then suddenly we get found out. you freak out, we release a statement. we can't keep doing that. why don't we just go public?’ he said starting to plead.
your eyes widen with the idea. you couldn't. ‘jb you know we can’t. I’m still on a dating ban. I'd be kicked out of YG, I can’t do that. lets just carry on like this.’ you were interrupted by Suha putting bowls down in front of you.
‘here you go, eat up darlings’ she sang. neither of you could break eye contact, she could sense the tension. ‘I'll check back in on you later’ she whispered, rubbing her hands on the towel that was draped out of her pinafore.
‘so you don't want to go public? you're happy to just keep sneaking around like this.. I want a normal life, I want it with you’ he snapped. his eyes fierce, piercing into yours.
‘I want that too, but you know we can't do that. we gave that up for this job. loads of idols date in secret, why can't we?’ you snapped back.
‘because I'm tired of this, I want to be able to meet you whenever, I want you to feel safe enough to meet me outside the agency, i don't want to have to sneak out of your dorm or wake up and you be gone from bed at 6am for rehearsals’ you could see him getting emotional.
‘I get that, but we have no idea what would happen to us. we could be dropped from the agency. the backlash we could get. you’re willing to give that all up? just wait until my dating ban is over!’ you started to get annoyed, why wouldn't he understand that was he was asking was too much.
‘no y/n, you’ve made it quite clear. work means more to you. just forget it’ he snapped, pulling his hands out from your grip.
‘jb.. are you seriously ending it’ you said, stunned by what he had just said.
‘I just can’t sneak round all the time, I want something real. I want that with you. but I can't come second anymore to a job’ he said standing up, he grabbed his jacket from the chair he was sat on and stood up. looking down at your eyes, full of tears. he looked over to Suha who was stood at the till, her gaze was stern back at him. he shifted back over to you. tears now rolling down your face, you couldn't cry, just tears blankly rolling down your cheek. you wanted to plead with him, make him stay and talk about it, but you couldn't move. it was over.
‘bye y/n’ he said, walking over to the door. you eyes fixated on the untouched food on the table.
your heart broke, it was over. he just upped and left like it was nothing. you sat there, unable to move, say anything. you felt a figure take the seat opposite you, your eyes gently shifted up to see who it was through a thick river of tears.
‘he’ll come back’ it was Suha, picking up chopsticks and tucking into his untouched food. you sniffled, blinking tears out your eyes.
‘they always do. you know y/n, I've met many girls over the years, jb has never brought anyone here. not one. you’re different’ she said in-between slurps.
‘I thought so too’ you whispered, barely getting through a sentence.
‘trust me. there's something special between you two. give him time. men need that little bit longer. he will come back’ she chuckled, lifting the bowl to her face and slurping the last of the broth. she placed the bowl down and let out a sigh of satisfaction. ‘I make good food, come on, eat’ she said picking up your pair of chopsticks and putting them in your limp hands.
you lazily picked up some noodles and slurped them, undeniably; she was right.. they were delicious. lets just hope she's right about jb needing time.
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hi bbys, here's part 2 of idol secrets, I hope u all enjoyed. this is kinda just conversation and setting the scene so the next part (if u all want it) will be much better lmao. pls lmk if u like it and would like another part!!
synopsis: y/n and JB have been keeping their relationship from the public eye for some time, but at an award show they get caught in a situation that could blow it for them both?
being in love was hard enough, especially when it was a secret. there were moments where you didn't mind it being a secret, it was almost nice that it was just shared between the two of you; other times it got to you. hearing rumours about JB with other idols, edited moments between him and others and vice versa. you'd both kept up this secret for 6 months, and boy was it hard. you and your group RO5EY hadn’t long debuted so you were hesitant about getting a bad rep so early on; hence the secret. you knew some idols were public about their relationship, but the girls had told you that it was best to keep it on the down low for now, especially because got7′s fans were mostly girls; you never wanted to offend them. you knew they were important to JB, so they were important to you.
you and JB had met after you and the girls had featured on Weekly Idol; where you were all doing boy group dances. low and behold, got7 Lullaby came on, one of your favourite songs of their’s. you were all lucky enough to be allowed your own instagram pages, which is where JB found you. the moment his dm came through, quite frankly your heart fell out your ass. scared you’d offended them. ‘not bad, think I could do Without You, better though’ he wrote. it was enough knowing that he’d seen RO5EY’s debut single, let alone seen you dance to Lullaby. being from rival agencies mean it was a big no no to ever conversing outside of pleasantries at award shows and such; let alone texting. but that almost made it better, no one would ever expect it. a JYP idol that's been debuted for 7 years, and a YG newbie who's been around for less than a year. who would have guessed?
from that dm you mostly FaceTimed, knowing that going out in public would be hard. luckily he didn’t live in the JYP dorm anymore, so occasionally you could sneak round to his apartment and spend some time with him. but him coming to the dorm you shared with 4 other girls was impossible; they were all cool with it, but if other trainees or press found out, it was game over. so typically you kept it to pleasantries at events, trying not to make too much eye contact, staying as far away from each other as possible. which was hard, believe me. you could both sometimes sneak out of his place at night and walk round or get some street food, but only really late at night, to avoid him being recognised.
it had been a crazy year, releasing your first album, being invited to award shows, shooting your reality YouTube series, life was a dream; but being nominated for ‘Best New Artist’ at Mnet Asian Music Awards was the biggest shock of the year. all the girls were so excited, and you couldn’t have been more proud. preparation for the show began early, rehearsals, costumes, award show outfits, it was a lot. you’d barely had time to see JB, but he’d still wait for you everyday outside YG and walk with you for a while; listening to you talk about rehearsals and how nervous you were. it was moments like this you loved, no one else about, just you two.
finally the day came around, you didn't care about winning, it was always so exciting to see other performances and meet other groups you'd loved for so long. you'd arrived at the venue, emotionally and physically exhausted from preparing for your performance. there was a nervous buzz in the dressing room as stylists and makeup artists ran around trying to do everything in a very short space of time. you'd been thinking about jb all day, wondering what he was up to, had he arrived yet, how he was feeling. but to be safe, you'd not looked at your phone all day, knowing that if you messaged him; toxic news articles were only a few clicks away. and you didn’t need that kind of pressure today. the other members were chatting about who else was at the show tonight, when you suddenly heard his name. ear pricking to attention you looked up from the makeup chair to the mirror in front of you. seeing them behind you pulling a little smirk. you widened your eyes to hint to them to stop, knowing that if even the makeup artist heard, you and jb are dead meat to the public. they pressed their fingers to their lips with a chuckle, too close.
finally you were all left alone to rehearse a little before the show, giving you guys a little privacy. ‘so, have you heard from him yet’ Ara said pulling your tired body down to the sofa. ‘I don't know, I’ve not been on my phone today’ you responded, cracking open a bottle of water. ‘what why?’ she responded. ‘too scared I guess’ you said after taking a big sip of water. ‘you don't need to be, everyone has been so supportive, I know hate scares you but Roses are showing more love than others are showing hate. honestly look’ she said handing you your phone with a smile. ‘you unlocked your phone and went straight to twitter, only to be greeted by a flood of love and support from everyone. as if one queue, a message from jb popped up at the top of the screen.
j: just got here. sitting front row, I'll try to not stare too much. good luck y/n; jb x
a small smile appeared on your lips as you slid down to reply.
y/n: likewise. see u after x
keeping it low key, even in text. with that, a staff member burst into the room taking you all by surprise. ‘right ladies, time to go’ he said then promptly talking into his mic. you gathered yourselves before taking one last look in the mirror. amazing what 2 hours in a makeup chair can do, you thought. the walk down to the stage was always the worst, but somehow knowing jb was in the audience made you feel much better. or worse. it wasn't clear.
you all made it to the side of the stage, doing a group hug before dispersing to your positions. you loved the song, the routine, the girls, your fans, your life had become a dream. but not being able to share it with jb publicly hurt. more than you thought it would. the music started, hearing the intro in your in-ears. the lights and music complimenting each other perfectly. being the first one to sing you felt the pressure, you set the tone for the performance. bad start, bad performance. as the lights lit up the stage you could see the faces staring back at you, moving to the music that filled the room. you almost didn’t want to see jb, thinking it would make it worse. but as luck would have it, there he was, as promised; front row. the rest of got7 all grooving with the music, reassuring. his gaze was low and sultry, as he did best. his eyes not moving off you the whole time, you'd look away to come back, only to find him still staring.
as the song picked up and it came towards the dance break, you realised this was the first time jb had ever seen you do this live. and the choreography wasn’t exactly 100% PG, it was a liiiittle sexy one might say. but there was nothing that could be done about it now, you were already doing it. on the floor, running your hand up your tight then your side, you flicked your eyes up to see jb looking absolutely mesmerised by what he was watching. you could see him taking a sharp breath followed by a nod of approval. well done you. the lights dimmed and the audience roared with applause, the relief you felt was unmatched. you'd never get used to that feeling. you looked around to your band mates to see them all beaming from ear to ear, proud as ever.
back in the dressing room you all made a quick change into your award looks and had your makeup touched up before going back out there. the energy in the room after a performance was something you never wanted to forget. the pride, the relief among a million other things. before long you were all ready to go and take you seats. a member of staff walked in front of you to escort you to the seats. as you kept travelling down the stairs you began to feel worried. they usually sit the more well known artists at the front, in camera view. while the newer and lesser known groups are further up. apparently not. you'd passed all the groups you thought you'd be sat with, giving them a polite wave as they smiled to you. now at the front row of seats the man gestured for you to sit down. front. row. it suddenly dawned on you, jb is front row. you flicked your head round to see where he was, having seen him on stage. you couldn't see him, but you did see Jackson smiling at you, which meant, he wasn’t far away.
you all took your seats, you on the end. your head looking down, not wanting to lift it up in fear of seeing him. sheepishly, you lifted your gaze towards where you'd seen Jackson; now all of got7 were looking this way. they all gave a small applause and congratulated yourself and the rest of the girls on your performance. you thanked them and smiled, trying to keep it short and sweet. you didn’t look long enough to see jb.
the outfit you were wearing was kinda short, making sitting down a little uncomfortable. with the knowledge that you were probably in camera view you were very wary of showing too much. tugging the skirt down wasn't helping. suddenly a tall figure loomed over you, quickly placing a blazer over your lap. you looked up to see jb making the same sultry smile at you. ‘better?’ he remarked. you nodded sheepishly, but not breaking eye contact. sheer panic set in, what would people’s reactions be? only to be followed by Jackson, mark, Bambam and Jinyoung doing the same for your other members as to not be suspicious to anyone. they really did care. the other members thanked them and the boys returned to their seats. jb staring for just a few seconds longer. the crowd cooed in approval, hearing whispers of them being ‘such gentlemen’ that of which they were.
the rest of the show you were casting quick glances over to jb and you could feel him doing the same. never at the same time, obviously. the show nearing a close you all began to feel the nerves.. it wasn’t about winning, everyones love was enough. but you still couldn’t help but want the title, you'd all worked so hard for it. with that thought looming in your mind the host stood on the stage ready to announce the winners of each category. ‘Nominated for Best New Artist’ the words echoing round the room. you almost blacked out for the nominees, just doing an autopilot applause when everyone else did. ‘RO5EY’ you heard, casting a smile towards the camera that was looking directly at the group. then going back to the autopilot clap. ‘And the winner of Best New Artist 2021 is...’ the tension growing around you. ‘RO5EY’ the host said smiling. applause and cheer filled the room as you just sat stunned. what the actual fuck just happened. coerced out of your daze by Ara pulling you up out of your seat, you placed jb’s blazer on the chair as you came back to. the walk up to the stage felt like a blur, but you somehow managed to get up there without falling and breaking something. bowing to the host before he stepped aside for the group to make an acceptance speech. Ara did the honours, without a single complaint as you didn’t think you could string 2 words together at this point.
looking out into the audience again you saw jb, smiling from ear to ear at you; the most comforting smile. ‘you did it’ he mouthed. knowing there were so many eyes on you at this point, all you could do was cast a small subtle smile. hoping he knew how much you cared. being honest Ara’s speech went in one ear and out the other until she mentioned Roses; snapping you back into reality as they cheered in the audience as you blew kisses to where the noise was coming from. with that, you made your way back to the seats, electrified with what had just happened.
you all sat through the rest of the awards before all of the groups are invited on stage for the finale. clutching jbs jacket as you walked back up the stairs and stood as groups filled the space around you. the stage had an open top, and it wasn't as warm as it was when you'd performed; the cold breeze wrapping round your bare shoulders and legs. fireworks filled the sky as you all looked up applauding the beautiful lights that loomed above you. the hustle and bustle of artists congratulating each other and dancing around you made you feel less isolated. without warning a hand pulled the jacket out from your grasp and draped it over your shoulders, immediately eliminating the cold feeling and replacing it with a comforting warmth. you shot round to look who it was. jb was stood before you, hands still on your shoulder. panicked, you quickly thanked him, trying to make it look as casual of an interaction as possible. only to see that behind him, other members of got7 were doing the same for your members. wow they really did care enough to help make this look as non suspicious as possible. ‘I'm so proud of you’ jb said, smiling at you. ‘thank you, it feels like a fever dream to be honest’ you chuckled. ‘no, you deserve it. all of this’ he replied, dropping his hand from your shoulder and down your arm that faced the back of the stage so no one could see. then turning back to face the other members, knowing that even this short of an interaction was too long.
you held out for the rest of the finale without looking his way, thanking other artists and making pleasantries with many; before you were all ushered off the stage and back to your dressing rooms. finally making it back to your dressing room, you realised you'd still got jb’s blazer around your shoulders. you needed to return it before anyone saw you leave with it; it was a good time to do so while all the makeup artists and stylists were gathering their things. blazer in hand you quietly searched the halls for got7′s dressing room. after a few minutes of searching you found it, already hearing a rumble of voices in there. you gently knocked on the door, preparing a story just in case a staff member opened the door. low and behold, and to your relief; Jackson opened the door. shouting you name which spurred on a loud cheer from the rest of the boys as he grabbed your arm and pulled you into the room. the boys all gathered round and engulfed you into some kind of got7 sandwich hug. not unwanted. finally letting you go, you looked over to the sofa to see jb sat there, lovingly gazing at you. ‘ill never get sick of that look’ you thought. his big brown eyes still make you nervous. ‘lets go into the hallway’ he said standing up, wrapping one arm around you waist. warranting an ‘ooo’ from the apparently “grown up” boys.
closing the door behind him, you were backed up against the wall, his broad frame dangerously close to you. your breathing was sporadic, clearly under pressure here. ‘I just came to give you this back’ you said lifting the hand with his blazer clasped tightly. he looked at the blazer dismissively. ‘do you know how hard this is’ he said, never breaking the gaze. ‘I know’ you said, staring back up at him. ‘seriously, especially when you pull that shit on stage’ he mumbled in a low whisper. you frowned, not knowing what he meant. ‘new dance?’ he retorted, mockingly. you chuckled, realising he meant the dance break that wasn’t very parent friendly. ‘oh I see, yeah that's new’ you smirked. ‘I made a mistake sitting front row, far too close for someone who's trying to keep his hands off you’ he said leaning into your neck. his breath dancing across your now exposed shoulders. his hand following the trail, moving a piece of hair blocking his path before gently grasping your neck. you took a slow inhale, desperately trying to steady your breathing. his warm plush lips meeting the sweet spot of your neck, ruining your finally steady breathing again. ‘this is getting harder to hide’ you whispered with laboured breath. ‘I know, maybe we shouldn't’ he replied, lingering over the place he’d connected. you smiled both at the feeling and at his suggestion. ‘you know we can’t’ you replied running a hand up his chest. ‘we could, might have to quit music forever but we could’ he chuckled into your neck. ‘don't tempt me’ you replied tugging on his belt, pulling him in even closer. hearing footsteps down the hall snapped you both back to reality, quickly putting some distance between the two of you. pushing some hair back over your neck, to conceal any potential mark he'd left.
a staff member holding a clip board and a bin bag emerged from around the corner, casting a small smile towards to two very awkward looking individuals that you were. ‘thanks for the jacket’ you said, desperately trying to sound casual. ‘no problem and well done tonight. i’ll see you round’ he said, hands in pockets. you watched the staff member make his way towards the next corner, almost out of sight. you spun round to walk away; knowing you'd been far too long. your heels echoing throughout the hallway, nearing the door you came though you turned around, curious is jb was still there. he was, leaning against where you'd just been pinned to, watching you walk away. you smiled before putting your hands on the door to push them apart. ‘it’s getting really hard you know’ he shouted to you, still leaning. ‘I know you are’ you retorted, smiling back at him. he leaned his head back onto the wall, knowing exactly what you meant.
the relief you felt getting back to the dorm and getting into bed was amazing. the girls all chatted into the night, about what the schedule was for tomorrow, who they saw at the event. until the topic of apartments came up. ‘maybe we should look at getting our own place, for the 5 of us. its getting too cramped in here’ Ara said. the girls all agreed. ‘yeah then y/n can have jb over and wouldn’t have to sneak out every night’ Mina retorted. causing the room to fill with laughter. ‘ha ha very funny’ you mocked, not even looking up. ‘it wouldn’t kill us to look’ Ara said, picking up her phone and heading straight to apartment listings. ‘oh no’ she said, sounding far too serious for your liking. ‘um- don’t freak out. but you were spotted with jb tonight’ she said, clearly waiting for you to freak out. ‘what!?’ you yelled, running over to see what she was seeing. an article on twitter headlined ‘jb seen with rookie YG debut’ a literal nightmare. clicking on the article as 4 other head appeared around you to read at the same time. it wrote about the jacket and him putting it on you on stage, the finally being spotted outside his dressing room after the show. fuck. the comments were mixed, but mostly about you. how jb couldn't have any interest in someone so new. or how he wouldn’t be attracted to you. then the hate, ugly, untalented, ungrateful. separated by the his true fans, the real ahgase; who said they would be happy for him no matter what. and the Roses having your back.
your heart sank. it was over. there's no way your companies would allow you to be in the same room as each other now. you picked up your phone, seeing you'd already got a message from jb.
‘don’t panic. I know you are x’ he wrote, how did he see it before us.
‘I am, we should have been more careful’ you replied, tears filling up your eyes.
‘just let the company handle it, we’ve done nothing wrong’ he said, you could almost hear him saying it. that comforted you.
‘okay’ you responded, bluntly.
‘its going to be okay, I love you’ he said, that was the first time he'd ever said that.
it didn’t seem right considering your relationship was now in grave jeopardy; but you knew he was willing to risk it all for you. and you felt the same.
‘I love you too’ you typed back, eyes full of tears now.
Ara opened her arms for you to lean into, her comforting rub on your back sending your overly tired, stressed body into a deep sleep.
the morning was just a painful reminder of what had happened the night before. now more companies had picked up the story, more fans had heard about it, warranting more views for you to stress about. Yang Hyun-suk had called a meeting with the group upon hearing the news. and to be frank, you were shitting it.
‘so firstly, congratulations ladies. Best New Artist, you should be very proud of yourselves. But we need to discuss this article.’ he said, now sounding very serious. ‘this is a very competitive world, anyone and everyone are willing to tear you down, for no reason. they will make stuff up, blow things way out of proportion as they have done here’ he continued. the feeling of total fear turned into confusion, does he think its not true? ‘you have to be very careful with who you associate with, especially boy groups. their fans are loyal, and don’t like it when they're seen with other females. you can understand that right’ he said beginning to sound more compassionate. a look of confusion clearly plastered all over your face as Ara steps on your foot to signal you to stop. ‘absolutely’ she responded. ‘you just have to keep interactions shorts, stick to the pleasantries, hello, thank you, goodbye. that's all.’ he continued. you nodded shyly, still trying to grasp what he meant. ‘I’ve worked in this industry for a long time, I know how these articles work. they take one interaction and make it a bigger deal than it is. ill release a statement squashing this, but you all need to be more careful’ he said, sitting back in his chair. ‘we will sir’ Mina chimed in, not giving anyone a chance to say anything. ‘good, don’t worry y/n I'll get this sorted’ he said finally, giving a caring smile, clearly seeing you looked distressed by the matter. Mina elbowing you to stand up and leave, still bewildered by what just happened the girls pulled you into a hug. which was very much so needed. ‘god that was close’ Ara laughed. tears filled your eyes as you bust into tears. ‘oh my god, what's the matter’ Mina said throwing an arm round your shoulder. ‘I thought it was over for us’ you cried, burying your head into her arm. ‘don’t worry! he said he would fix it, now go, I know you want to see him’ Ara said brushing the now wet hair from your face.
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if you guys would like a part 2 of this please let me know! also my requests are open if you want to have something personal written for you :)
synopsis: y/n is a makeup artist on changkyun’s ‘god damn’ MV shoot, when the rapper takes a sudden liking to her; she becomes more involved in the shoot than she anticipated.
pairing: changkyun x reader
5am was not the ideal start time for y/n, especially in the cold and with no coffee. In hand carrying 5 alarmingly large cases of makeup and costume through the staff entrance of the set for the shoot; silently assuring yourself that you ‘would get coffee or so help her god.’ Being the first one here you flicked on all the lights and threw down the cases of makeup that were slowly making you feel like your fingers were going to fall off- with a clatter on the table you exhaled and rubbed your now very sore fingers. you loved her job as a makeup artist, but it was hard to like it this early in the morning; and once again, without coffee.
you began shoving boxes round the room to clear space for the fitting and hanging the clothes up on the railing beside the mirror until you heard a familiar voice singing a very joyful ‘good morning y/n.’ You flashed a look in the direction of the door to see Jules, the head stylist in her puffy jacket (which looked like it would swallow the entire 5ft1 woman whole) duffle bag on one shoulder and gripping 2 cups of what looked like Starbucks coffee.
You stood up throwing your hair back behind your shoulders, taking the cup from Jules who extended it towards you. ‘You ready for today?’ Jules questioned, taking a sip from the cup she hugged in her hands. ‘I am now’ you said gesturing to the coffee you’d been thinking about from the moment you sat in the car on the way here. ‘Thanks for filling in by the way, Soo was really worried about leaving us without a makeup artist but her little one is really sick. I really owe you one’ Jules chuckled, setting her jacket down and picking up the makeup case and opening it. Soo was the whole reason you got into makeup, she was the head makeup artist at the company you worked for- granted you were a little nervous to be deemed ‘head makeup artist’ for the day, but with her daughter being as cute as she is, you could forgive her for being ill. ‘No no it’s fine, call it even for the coffee’ you smiled rolling out the makeup brushes.
A few more members of the team came into the studio and began to help you set up. 8am rolled around and your client was expected to arrive anytime, in the meantime you went over the makeup brief and sat on your phone scrolling aimlessly. ‘Morning everyone’ a deep voice said from the doorway. Your head whipped round to see the unfamiliar face smiling towards Jules. His black long hair draped over one eye; as he stretched out his arms to hug the little too excited Jules. ‘Oh good morning love!’ she sang, grinning from ear to ear. ‘Changkyun, this is y/n’ she said extending her arm out, gesturing towards you who was now stood up, coffee cup in hand for comfort. ‘Soo had to look after her little one, so y/n is going to look after you today. she’s well on her way to being head makeup artist’ Jules sang like a proud mother. You just stood there and chuckled at her. Changkyun paused for a moment, looking you dead in the eye before slowly putting his hand out for you to shake. You uncomfortably swallowed before shaking his hand back and gave a closed mouth smile staring him back in the eyes. ‘Nice to meet you, y/n’ he replied slowly, with a hint of sultry. His eyes dropped slowly over your body, not unnoticed, but somehow not unwanted. Hands still touching, Jules clapped, pulling you both back into the reality of being in a room with other people. ‘Shall we get you changed then?’ Jules said, ushering Changkyun over to the clothing rail. You began to feel your ears burning red and your hands run cold. He knew exactly what he was doing. And my god, it was working.
Watching his take off his jacket while Jules held up countless outfits against his chest, deciding which one would capture the concept of the shoot. After much deliberation they settled on a mesh shirt with a beige jacket over the top. Changkyun cast a look over in your direction where you leaned against the makeup table trying to act as casual as you could; as he pulled his oversized black shirt over his head revealing what can only be described a the body of a god. his gaze never leaving your’s. your breath hitched as his shook his hands through his hair; leaving everyone in the room making noises of approval and gawking at his body. ‘we need to draw the tattoos on you before we put this one though’ Jules said hanging the shirt back up and looking over towards you. ‘y/n do you want to get started on that before we dress him? just do whatever you think would match the theme’ Jules continued, Changkyun smirked, knowing exactly how this was going to go.
‘oh, okay yeah.. um, come sit here’ you said awkwardly motioning over to the couch that was placed in the middle of the room. he flopped down spreading his arms over the back of the sofa, as you slowly walked over; tattoo pens in hand. you couldn’t even bring your eyes up to meet his yet you could feel his stare casting itself over your entire body. suddenly wishing you wore a bigger shirt. softly you pulled the cap off the pen and cleared your throat, desperately trying to look him in the eye but failing miserably. ‘so um.. I was thinking, maybe something on your neck? is that okay?’ you uttered quietly, playing with the cap of the pen to ease your nerves. ‘I like that.’ changkyun replied, his gaze still running over your upper body. somehow it didn’t feel like he was talking about the tattoo. ‘okay.. can you um just..’ you trailed off as you gently turned his face away by his jawline and shuffled in a little closer to get a better handle on his neck. you cold hands touched his warm skin, immediately repeating the feeling of blood draining from your face as you placed the pen on his neck. your eyes flicked over to the mirror that faced the couch; where you saw changkyun looking directly at you, smirking as he saw your eyes meet. your heart felt like it was beating out your chest, becoming very worried he could hear it the same as you heard it in your ears.
around 10 minutes passed and you’d finished the first tattoo and you moved onto the next one; on the upper side of his bicep. this job was becoming a bit of a gift and a curse. the rest of the staff carried on organising, which should have made the situation feel much more relaxed, yet it didn't seem to make any difference, you still felt like your heart was about to burst out your chest. until he spoke. ‘do you have any?’ he murmured. you almost didn’t hear it. you shifted your eyes from your work to his face to see if it was directed at you. his dark gaze was staring back at you, taking you by surprise. ‘any what?’ you murmured back at the same level, looking back at his arm. ‘any tattoos?’ he responded. you swallowed slowly, how on earth did his voice make you so nervous? it cast goosebumps all over your body yet made you feel like you were burning up; it was almost repulsive as he knew what he was doing, but you didn't want it to stop.
a moment passed as you replied ‘yeah.. I have 3′ you steadied you breath trying to sound relaxed, like you weren’t going to explode. ‘what are they?’ he questioned, his voice beginning to sound softer as the conversation began to flow. you pulled away from the tattoo and gently pushed your hair over your left shoulder; turning your upper body the same way. ‘so.. I have one here’ you said softly, showing the back of your shoulder to him. his eyes were low as they took in all of your back, not leaving the mark on you until the last moment when you turned back to face him. his gaze flicking back up to meet yours as you turned to the other side to gesture to one on the side of your ribs, pulling your shirt up just a tiny bit to reveal the next trace of ink. his now hunched over body dangerously close to your exposed skin; causing you to suddenly stop, lowering your shirt back down and locking eyes with him. ‘and um, I can’t show you the other one..’ you trailed off, picking your pen back up. you could tell he was still looking at you. ‘why?’ he queried, in an extra low, extra sultry voice. the smirk on his lips growing larger as he began to guess as to why it was something you couldn't show him. he thought seemed to excite him. and equally, it excited you. ‘its um, in a place I can’t show you..’ you chucked softly, hoping it would break his intense gaze. to your dismay, he remained his harsh look. ‘show me’ he practically growled, his voice as low and the pit in your stomach. your eyes quickly shifted round the room, noticing that everyone had now left. ‘I can’t..’ you replied with a little chuckle. this response seemed to peak Changkyun’s interest in the matter. ‘show me where on me then’ he whispered slowly reaching for your hand and pulling it towards his body that was now shifting to his slouched torso and parted legs. your heart began to race, with the knowledge of where the tattoo was and knowing where you were going to have to touch him. this was less than professional, but somehow you didn’t care. he placed your hand on his chest trailing it down towards his abs. your fingers lightly leading the way until he reached the base of his stomach.
‘here?’ he paused the motion and looked up towards you, a smirk plastered over his lips. a smirk that transferred onto your lips too. ‘a bit further’ you whispered, earning a breath from changkyun. his hand continued down past his stomach, onto the waistband of his jeans, causing him to exhale gently. just as both your hands approached the bulge that had now appeared under his jeans, you took control, steering his hand to the side next to his hip. ‘here’ you whispered cheekily, earning a loud yet disappointed exhale from his bitten lips. ‘I see’ he said, releasing your hand from his grip and placing his hands behind his head and leaning back. his eyes moving up and down your body as you stood back up and put the pens away. ‘I'm done’ you taunted, leaning against table looking at him with low eyes. sticking his tongue in his cheek pausing for a moment before pushing himself up; he walked slowly over to meet you. feeling the heat from his bare chest inches away from your small frame. his height looming over you made you feel tiny, and he liked that. he thrived on it.
his now tattooed bicep curled up following his vascular hand towards your neck, goosebumps coated your arms from top to finger tips. his fingers trailed over your exposed shoulder, hooking his finger under the single strap from your top and and pulling it towards him. the inches between you two vanished leaving your body pressed against his taught chest. he leaned down, his breath trailing over your neck until he stopped at your ear. ‘no we’re not’ he said in a low breathy tone. your heart was beating a million miles per hour, your lips burned to touch his but you couldn’t move. like your entire body had stopped working.
changkyun pulled away, leaving your stunned body stuck in place. finally giving you a chance to breathe. his back muscles moving with every step it took away; making his way over to the clothing rail and putting his mesh shirt on without even looking at you. as if on queue; Jules entered clapping at changkyun in his outfit. ‘oh doesn’t he look great!’ she sang holding his face in her hands. ‘right lets get you on set!’ she said, pulling his hand out the door and onto set. leaving you in the dressing room, trying to rationalise everything that just happened. unsuccessfully. suddenly her head poked back into the room taking you by surprise. ‘aren’t you coming?’ she queried. ‘yeah, yeah I'm coming’ you replied pushing your confused body off the desk and following her out.
the set looked insane, the lights were low and red creating a really sultry vibe. almost dingy. the room was full of extras talking quietly and milling around, the crew on the other side of the room looking like they were getting ready to begin. a rather tall looking man wearing a directors hat clapped to the room of people and shouted ‘right everyone, we are going to get started! we are going to get the second scene out the way first then we shall start shooting the dancing! okay! changkyun and ara come over here.. changkyun sit down and ara if you could get on top of him please’ he said motioning them to a green couch that was placed in the middle of the room. a tall black haired woman lead the way, she was gorgeous, her short hair grazed her shoulders and her makeup was sexy and sultry. bothered wasn't the word you would use to describe the description, but curious was. you wanted to see how this would unfold. changkyun shot a look over to you, once again a smirk on his face. you desperately wanted to keep your face neutral, knowing what he wanted you to react and not giving him the satisfaction was far more important. with that he flopped onto the couch, his arms over the back. this looked alarmingly familiar. ara gently straddled him, placing her delicate arms over his shoulders, awaiting further instruction. ‘okay great! so your basically just going to be touching him, hands on his neck, chest, hair, things like that. just make it look natural’ the director instructed. the 2 nodded in response. the discomfort this brought you was really beginning to settle in. you sat down on the crew chair behind you and crossed your legs, just watching.
a lull of whispers filled the room as the crew got into position, leaving changkyun a few seconds to look over at you, hoping this would make you jealous. you wouldn’t give it to him. you couldn’t. pulling your phone out your pocket seemed like the best option. so you did, and began mindlessly scrolling, trying to ignore the very uncomfortable scene that was about to play out before you. ‘aaaand, action!’ called the director, the smoke machines began to spray thick fog throughout the room, a deep bass began to play only adding to the atmosphere. a few seconds passed of you scrolling on your phone trying to ignore it. but you couldn’t help but flick your eyes up from your screen. her hands were all up in his hair and trailing down his neck, her head thrown back leaving her exposed chest and neck to his gaze. wow this was uncomfortable. the discomfort was interrupted by the booming voice of the director ‘CUT’ he shouted, immediately the lights came on and the lull of quiet voices resumed. the pair looked confused, as the director strode over to the two on the sofa. the words exchanged were quiet, making sure that no one else heard. with that he made his way back over to the crew. ‘okay lets go again. aaaand action!’ he called. the atmosphere fell again. and so did your eyes to your phone. this time it lasted a little longer, until the director called cut again. the director lifted his hat to wipe sweat from his brow as he chatted to ara and changkyun. ara nodded strongly and apologised to him and got back into position.
the interruptions continued another 2 times; causing the previous lull of whispers to become louder from the crew. Jules was stood talking to the producer who was looking rather disgruntled; making you wonder what the heck was going on. A rather worried Jules shuffled back over to meet you sighing as she sat down. ‘what’s going on?’ you queried, trying to sound as disinterested as possible. Jules leaned over to you, trying to make the conversation as unheard as possible. ‘well.. she’s just not quite getting the direction. it looks awkward on camera. I think they're going to call for a break and try again later’ she whispered, eyes flicking over to the now departed duo on the couch every few words. ‘okay guys, go grab yourself a drink and something to eat and we will start again in 20 minutes, sorry guys’ the producer called to the extras who are shared the same confused look as they walked out the room to the snack room.
the director and producer walked over to ara and changkyun who were now looking over the directions on the paper in front of them. ‘grab your brushes, lets go listen in’ Jules said cheekily dragging you over to the group, to touch up their makeup. you pulled a powder brush out of your waist pouch and some a compact and began to power changkyun’s face. the conversation sounded intense. ‘it’s just that it’s looking a little awkward on camera. you’re both very farm apart, your bodies need to be closer together. more intimate looking.’ he director said awkwardly. changkyun didn’t even seem to be listening. he was looking back up at you, even though you weren’t looking at him, you wouldn’t. not right now. ‘sorry I don’t want to be a pain.. I just can’t imagine what you're asking’ ara said shyly, fiddling with the hem of her shirt.
‘come here’ changkyun demanded, not breaking his gaze at you. you shifted your eyes up to meet his. ‘what?’ you questioned, lowering your brush from his cheek. ‘like this’ he said calmly, taking your arm and pulling you down onto the sofa. suddenly you were straddling him, brushes still in hand and very confused. before you even had chance to object, one hand was trailing up your thigh to your hip while the other one travelled from your shoulder to your neck as his mouth made its way to meet it. his hot breath marking where you longed for his mouth to plant itself. his lips stopping centimetres from your sweet spot. the crew erupted with praise and woah’s. wishing he would stay there for a few more seconds was too much to ask as he pulled away, leaning back on the coach and removing his hands from your hip and neck. his eyes meeting ara’s shocked face, ‘like that’ he smirked. slowly you stood up, fixing yourself as you tried to come back to reality. ‘yes yes like that! lets go for a take while the extras are eating’ the director said running back to the camera followed by the director. Jules dragged your stunned body back to the crew area as your legs wouldn’t seem to carry you, before you could even say anything to changkyun about how he firstly shouldn’t have done that, or apologise to ara.
you watched as they got into position again, ran the scene, still as awkward as the last. the sighs and quick cut from the crew told you that they felt the same. ‘okay guys go get a drink and we will see if we can re work the scene’ the producer announced, very deflated. ara apologised and left the room, you couldn’t help but feel bad for her. this was uncomfortable, getting that intimate with someone in front of a whole crew. lord. you pulled your phone out your pocket to check the time. they were running behind. badly. as you locked it and put it back in your pocket you saw the director power walking over towards you. never good. ‘y/n will you do us a favour’ he asked you, sounding a little desperate. this could go one of 2 ways you thought. coffee run.. or something you realllly didn’t want to do. ‘umm.. what is it?’ you asked cautiously. ‘would you just do the scene with changkyun? we are running really behind and don’t have time to keep refilming’ he pleaded. you suddenly realised the entire crew was looking at you. including changkyun. ‘um.. I'm sure ara will be fine after she has a drink just give her another shot, please’ you whispered trying to not be heard by anyone else. ‘please y/n we don't have time, it’ll take 5 minutes max, please i’ll owe you one..’ he said, clasping his hands together pleading. you shifted your gaze over to changkyun who was stood in eye line behind the director, the corner of his lip curling into a smirk. god I hate him, you thought. ‘um.. yeah okay fine’ you said running one hand through your hair trying to calm yourself down. ‘yes okay amazing, get into positions please!’ he shouted turning back towards changkyun. your chest was burning like you were on fire as you watched him walk over to the couch, knowing exactly what was going to happen made it so much worse.
slowly walking to meet him at the coach and standing over him as he looked up at you with burning desire. you adjusted your shirt slightly before gently straddling him, keeping you distance still. feeling the discomfort erupting. changkyun was obviously enjoying your awkwardness, chuckling as he reached one arm around your hips and pulling you closer to him so your core was now directly on his bulge. your throat hitched as his cool breath trailed down your cleavage, never breaking eye contact. the burn in your chest was spreading through your entire body, every part taking turns to be set on fire. ‘I told you we weren’t done’ he whispered gruffly, knowing exactly what he meant. the moment was interrupted by the director ‘okay right lets go, very natural, just like earlier, y/n just follow the lead okay? right aaaand action!’ he called, causing the entire set to fall silent, waiting for whatever was about to happen. it took a moment before anything happened, soaking in exactly where your bodies connected. the music boomed low as you both became engulfed in a spray of smoke. it felt far more comfortable than before, like no one could see you.
changkyun’s hand spread flat travelling up your thigh, curving to the contours of your hip, leading up your side. your body froze outwardly, but inside you felt everything. his hand on a path to your breast, taunting you with the feeling he redirected his graze to gently trail over the top of your breast and up your neck. forcefully gripping the back of your neck and planting soft kisses up it, starting at the base and slowly working his way up. taking his time on every spot, missing non of it. earning a soft blow of air from your mouth are you arched your back to meet his hard chest. a breathy ‘knew it’ escaped his lips between harsh kisses up you neck as he reached your sweet spot.
you couldn’t let him have all the fun. you thought to yourself as you reached down to his belt loops, pulling your cores closer together taking him by surprise. a quiet low groan left his lips as you reached one hand into the back of his hair; gently tightening your grip, keeping him in place. his hands fell from you neck, holding his grip on your hips. you knew this was the reaction you wanted but you couldn’t stop there. taking the opportunity to snake your right hand up his chest to meet his jawline, holding it lightly, leaving his neck exposed. his eyes connected with yours, letting you have full control of him. his rosy lips slightly parted as you leaned towards them. grazing your nose against his, lips inches away from each other. the torment was well received, noticing a small smirk on changkyun’s lips. ‘kiss me then’ he whispered, just loud enough for you to hear. you let out a breathy laugh as you removed the inches between you two, grazing your lips against his. you felt his entire body relax beneath you as he moaned into the kiss; allowing you full control. or so you though, he quickly wrapped a strong arm around your waist, flipping you over so he was on top. his torso baring weight down on you, pulling your legs to wrap around him. hands either side of your face to keep you exactly where he wanted you, leaving you completely submissive to his grip.
‘aaaand cut!’ the director shouted, pulling you both out of the complete state of euphoria you were just in. ‘fantastic guys, wow that was great. I think that’s it, take 10 minutes and we will start the next scene’ the producer continued, clapping as he stood up out of his chair. leaving the crew to continue to their lull. you slowly looked up at changkyun again who hadn’t seemed to look away. his once perfectly tousled hair now a mess, reflective of yours. you pushed yourself to sit upright on the couch, releasing yourself from his arms. silence. from you both. desperately trying to think of what to say; changkyun began ‘I knew you weren’t done’ he smirked. causing you to chuckle awkwardly, ‘whatever’ you replied running a hand through your hair, putting it back in place. ‘the shoot finishes at 5, I'll see you after’ he said flopping back onto the couch next to you. he wanted you to say yes. you knew that. and you couldn’t have that. not yet. you leaned towards him, watching him think you were going to kiss him again. stopping just inches away from his lips you whispered; ‘we’ll see’ standing up and walking away before he even had a chance to open his eyes. catching a view of you before you left the room, realising his trousers were now getting uncomfortable..
