So, here's the thing. I honestly and truly do not believe that -- when it comes to power dynamics in relationships -- that a piece of fanfiction or fanart read or viewed by 100 people... or 1000 people... or even a million people, though that's quite rare...
....could ever, ever influence mass culture or behavior on any meaningful level, as opposed to mass media that gets seen on a huge scale: popular movies, popular tv, best-selling novels.
I also feel that fanfic and fanart created by women and gender & sexual minorities, especially the sexually explicit kind, has far less reach and power than live action porn created by and for cis het men (and honestly, live action porn created by and for cis gay men). Hell, I believe it's less influential than hentai, and that's pretty niche.
Women's sexuality has been oppressed and stigmatized for centuries, and I think our sexual expression needs to be defended and protected, within reason.
Kinks are kinks because they are taboo. Because they draw upon things in the real world that scare us, embarrass us, disgust us, go against our values and ethics when outside the space of erotic fantasy. That's why it's called "kink" -- as in bent. Not a straight line.
Rape fantasies are one of the most common and normal sexual fantasies for a woman to have.
Feminists fought over all this stuff in the 1980s. Google Andrea Dworkin and Catherine MacKinnon. Honestly, I pretty much agree with what little i've read of them. But in the end, their attempts to get rid of "problematic" porn did nothing but ban stuff LGBTQ+ people were creating on a small scale. Meanwhile, straight cis dudes were allowed to keep on truckin'.
The world is a trashfire. Rape culture hasn't been anywhere close to fixed yet. It's scary. I get it. But you aren't going to fix it by telling your friends in fandom to kill themselves over drawings and pixels and made-up people having made-up sex. It doesn't matter if the made-up sex is incest or rape. It isn't influencing the wider culture in any meaningful way. But telling someone to die or kill themselves or anything like that? That is actual, material harm.
If it's tagged and warned for, or labeled Choose Not To Warn? Let it be.
Just let people be, dude.
