AN ODE TO GODHOOD

... 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐚  𝐆𝐎𝐃  ? 

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━━━━  PRIVATE & SELECTIVE SUPERHUMAN OC  from original canon “ a chemical ascension ” ( est. 2014, revamped 2020 ) , created by NEO  ( he / him ) .  PLOT + LORE HEAVY , WITH INSPIRATION FROM CYBERPUNK MEDIA , BIBLICAL & MYTHOLOGICAL LORE .  

EXPLORES THEMES OF : DIVINITY & GODHOOD, DYSTOPIAN / CYBERPUNK REALITY, EXISTENTIALISM, SCIENCE & RELIGION, PARADOXES, DUALISM, LIMINAL SPACES, CORRUPTION, SPIRITUALITY + MORE . 

OTHER BLOGS :  fatedriven ( oc + canon multimuse . )

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james is pretentious and insufferable and this extends to his judgement on what cars people own... surprisingly not in a classist way but rather a "you spent that much on a hunk of metal that looks like shit and isn't even functionally worth it" sense. he'll laugh in the faces of anyone who thinks buying a cybertruck is a good decision.

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𝐓𝐘𝐏𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐄𝐎𝐏𝐋𝐄: 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑.

bold:  always  applies.   italic:   sometimes  applies.

𝐈. 𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍:  melancholy at best,  introspective,  severely misunderstood, pleasure in the subdued,  helping in your own way, dreams in poetry, the slowness of falling asleep,  refreshing meditation.

𝐈𝐈. 𝐒𝐔𝐍: sunbleached clothes,  futures that are too bright,  everything at arm’s length,  balancing intensity,  blind encouragement,  comfort of sleep,  distracting sunspots in your vision,  necessity of growth.

𝐈𝐈𝐈. 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐌: chaos with a purpose,  emotions running high,  natural comfortable anarchy,  high volume, leaving your mark,  brief flashes of violence,  rambling quickly,  the intensity of desire.

𝐈𝐕. 𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐃: running towards instead of away,  instinctive motivation,  making an impact,  knows everyone who knows anyone, playful pranks, mood swings in a split second,  collecting old trinkets,  uncontrollable focus.

𝐕. 𝐒𝐍𝐎𝐖:  serene on the surface,  cold blooded heart,  love it or hate it attitude, good memories, heavy discussions,  sharp determination,  relentless resolve,  not as scary as it seems.

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james doesn't just brood in the shower like some kdrama protagonist, he's one to partake in the "plays dramatic piano pieces in the middle of the night" type of brooding, and he'll pick purposefully complex / difficult pieces too (liszt is a go to, as you do). his neighbours are lucky that his penthouse is purposefully isolated (yes, he's bought out the entire floor to himself).

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𝐏𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋 : mutuals only. like this to give me the go-ahead to approach for plotting, as james is a muse who relies heavily on story-driven / pre-established interactions. for multimuses, although not necessary, it would help a lot if you had certain muse(s) in mind for plotting. i am also far more responsive on dis.cord, if you’d prefer speaking over there. [ in addition to my carrd, please read this & this for further information on interactions here ]

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* 𝐚 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐩 :

james is without tattoos or piercings ( should he be seen with either, they would be temporary or fake ). he can be best described as clean cut, incredibly polished and composed, as a deific figure should be ( at least, as a guise ) : sleek. untainted. without blemish or flaw. 

he’s also very particular about not liking photos being taken of him, and rarely takes photographs of himself. he’s a bit of a cryptid on social media, only posting once in a blue moon. any posts are mostly limited to pictures of objects, his surroundings, food and his cats.

very little is known about him outside of the public image he likes to project, and to different people, he changes this persona as he sees fit. in the same vein as deities appearing in different ways to different individuals, each person’s experience of him, in essence their literal and metaphorical “view” of him is shaped by their own notions ( i use more than one faceclaim / reference for him to reflect this – please refer to this post for further explanation ). for his work at nix corporation, although meticulous measures are already enforced to ensure memory erasing is carried out in each client, he dons a mask that covers his entire face, for extra measure.

[deiforme]

what a peculiar, wretched thing love is.  visceral, gut-wrenching — so inherently humane. lee jaehoon has never desired such an earthly thing, except perhaps in a long-forgotten childhood.  what he, the deity, seeks is not love, but reverence — unwavering devotion.  the congregation before him is filled with all kinds of people — some are perfectly fashioned soldiers at the ready, others remain skeptics — but soon, soon they will believe in nix’s cause. some things need to be broken in order to be fixed. others are too pretty, too fragile to survive the pecking order: plucking the wings from a butterfly will only accelerate its eventual demise. 

i am ruin, i am rebirth. i am both the end and the beginning.  each hallowed precipice of the walls around him reflects his resplendent light.  he is seamless in his sermon, the inner workings of clockwork, the cogs all spinning in tandem without flaw, as ordained.  he is equal parts chemical-laced machine and budding god. when his speech comes to a close, he recites once over in his head :  i am ruin, i am rebirth. i am both the end and the beginning.  the crowd beams back at him, their eyes glossy and subservient, and he knows he has succeeded once more.

following his teachings, many seek him for confession, to atone or be healed, to have their minds purified and freed of whatever holds them captive. and yet the blonde is here, divulging her innermost emotions, admitting to him the one thing he cannot promise with absolute certainty — love. though eden’s confession hardly surprises him, it is as peculiar as he considers human love to be. 

❝ ... you think me to be an idealist. ❞  he states matter-of-factly, steely gaze capturing hers ; james spins his words as gilded silk, brimming with tantalising promise,  ❝  i simply vowed my blessing and protection — to remain at your side.  ❞  nothing more, nothing less.   romanticism was another clause in itself, one that he’d never agreed to.  what was a god without his angels and devotees — and his most cherished one above all ? 

@maumets​  sought an audience .

[weusedtobegiants]

It flatters his vanity to be loved, yes, but in reality he does not want to be loved because if you are loved you must love in return and that he cannot do.

Anaïs Nin, from A Literate Passion: Letters of Anaïs Nin and Henry Miller, 1932-1953

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ON AMBIGUITY & INTERPRETATIONS :  

DO NOT REBLOG , COPY OR DRAW INSPIRATION FROM 

a LOT ( in fact most ) of what is known of james lies in ambiguity and is very grey / UNKNOWN .  the way that i tend to depict him is meant to give a sense of detachment , to serve as a kind of barrier to any visual depiction , hence why a lot of the graphics i make for this blog are faceless  ; there’s a huge grey area in how james views himself ( elevated , with a god complex attached to boot and a need to control how others view him  ; contrast to TAEJUN , who is portrayed as the PROPHETIC and very much still visibly humane figure to james’ DEIFIC imagery ) versus how the outside world views him , taking into account the lack of a view , or the variable distortions in the images / facets projected onto him ( both by himself and others ) that may or may not be true , a half-truth or entirely false. similarly , this is meant to mirror to an extent how , in religious text , there is the notion that man is UNWORTHY to look at god, to know what god looks like, or to even be in the near vicinity of god. there are many , many interpretations of what ( external and internal ) qualities a supreme being possesses ;  everyone has their own visualisations and expectations of what defines a god / divine being , and some may choose to not even stand by the idea of there even being any kind of deity . how they see god is largely and practically wholly up to them , although often shaped almost entirely and influenced heavily by others and the environment ( contrast this to the known information i supply to you regarding james’ character on this blog ) .  the questions they pose concerning what god is like have no definitive answers and are practically unknown . 

i may have a couple of faceclaims ( and other different references regarding appearance ) in place as a visual aid when writing james , but he is not meant to resemble them entirely , or even to a high degree . usually , when writing a character , i tend to have a clear and set image of what they look like and it rarely changes , yet this isn’t the case with james as it has changed greatly throughout the course of me writing him as a character ; thus , more recently , i have started to refrain from posting too many visual images ( save for icons ) regarding his appearance , preferring to use descriptors instead . 

the way i intend for james to come across is that both ooc and ic , others are allowed space to construct their own ideas with regards to how they view him as a character , from appearance to what their thoughts of him are , and all of those things will vary , perhaps greatly , between threads or points in time : there are very few things about this blog and character that are set in stone . that’s the kind of vibe i hope to give off in terms of how he and what he stands for ( i.e. in terms of morals , ulterior motives , the organisations he’s in charge of ) are meant to be interpreted , to allow for this VARIABILITY ( because naturally , everyone sees things differently and differing views on people are no exception ) . he’s meant to be highly paradoxical and unpredictable as a character , and whilst he may choose to reveal one side of himself at a particular time , that could all well change next time . bottom line : appearances aren’t everything .

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give Eden her man back right now

❝ ... and who are you to demand this of me ? if this man you speak of is none other than myself, i certainly do not recall belonging to anyone but myself — if eden wishes to speak to me directly, she may do so. ❞

[kingsmemes]

「   RP MEME :      GALA  STARTERS .   」   * change pronouns as needed .

‘ i didn’t know they let just anyone into this event. ’ 

‘ i’m surprised to see you here. ’

‘ of course i find you at the bar. ’

‘ what are you drinking, gorgeous/handsome? ’

‘ sorry, you just caught my eye. ’

‘ can i get you a drink? ’

‘ it’s a pleasure to meet you.’

‘ my, my. how long has it been, ___ ? ’

‘ you look like you needed a drink. ’

‘ please, i have an open seat at my table tonight. ’

‘ you clean up well. ’  

‘ i’ve heard so much about you. it’s nice to finally put a face to the name.’

‘ is this seat taken? ’

‘ i spotted you in the crowd and wanted to say hello. ’

‘ i’ve never seen you at one of these things before. ’

‘  i’m giving a speech at the ceremony. ’

‘ can you believe they managed to get a live band this year? ’

‘  are you going to the afterparty? ’

‘ i hope they’re not expecting me to sing/play. ’

‘ oh , you’re giving the speech tonight? ’

‘ these events never fail to bore me. ’

‘ i love coming to these things. ’

‘shh. the ceremony is starting.’

‘ when can we go home? ’

‘ care for a dance? ’

‘ yes, that was my way of asking if you’d like to dance. ’

‘ dance with me. ’

‘ did you come with someone tonight? ’

‘ you look amazing. ’

‘ is that your plus-one over there? ’

‘ i can’t stop looking at you. ’

‘ no one compares to you tonight. ’

‘ drink. i could use a drink.’

[neorph]

* 𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐀𝐊𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒  :    a selection of roleplay ask prompts compiled and adapted from the works of  haruki murakami .  any of these prompts may be modified accordingly to fit your muses.  warning for themes of existentialism, death and grief.

❝  whatever it is you’re seeking won’t come in the form you’re expecting.  ❞ ❝  i dream. sometimes i think that’s the only right thing to do.  ❞ ❝  don’t feel sorry for yourself. only assholes do that.  ❞ ❝  i don’t go out of my way to make friends, that’s all. it just leads to disappointment.  ❞ ❝  listen up - there’s no war that will end all wars.  ❞ ❝  no matter how much suffering you went through, you never wanted to let go of those memories.  ❞ ❝  despite your best efforts, people are going to be hurt when it’s time for them to be hurt.  ❞ ❝  but even so, every now and then i feel a violent stab of loneliness.  ❞ ❝  i want you always to remember me.  ❞ ❝  will you remember that i existed, and that i stood next to you here like this?  ❞ ❝  if you remember me, then i don’t care if everyone else forgets.  ❞ ❝  if you can love someone with your whole heart, even one person, then there’s salvation in life. ❞ ❝  anyone who falls in love is searching for the missing pieces of themselves.  ❞ ❝  sometimes when i look at you, i feel i’m gazing at a distant star.  ❞ ❝  i knew this was going to happen.  ❞ ❝  i think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that i’m not enough for you.  ❞ ❝  i’m not angry, either. i should be, but i’m not.  ❞ ❝  i thought i could imagine how much this would hurt, but i was wrong.  ❞ ❝  memories warm you up from the inside but they also tear you apart.  ❞ ❝  unfortunately, the clock is ticking.  ❞ ❝  pain is inevitable. suffering is optional.  ❞ ❝  what happens when people open their hearts?  ❞ ❝  that’s what it means to be alive.  ❞ ❝  i didn’t understand that a person can, just by living, damage another human being beyond repair. ❞ ❝  memories and thoughts age, just as people do. but certain thoughts can never age, and certain memories can never fade.  ❞ ❝  i have this strange feeling that I’m not myself anymore.  ❞ ❝  death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it.  ❞ ❝  in everybody’s life there’s a point of no return.  ❞ ❝  closing your eyes isn’t going to change anything.  ❞ ❝  keep your eyes wide open. only a coward closes his eyes.  ❞ ❝  i can bear any pain as long as it has meaning.  ❞ ❝  no truth can cure the sorrow we feel from losing a loved one.  ❞ ❝  as time goes on, you’ll understand. what lasts, lasts; what doesn’t, doesn’t.  ❞ ❝  time solves most things and what time can’t solve, you have to solve yourself.  ❞ ❝  our delicate friendship wasn’t going to last forever.  ❞ ❝  what a terrible thing it is to wound someone you really care for and to do it so unconsciously.  ❞ ❝  that’s what the world is , after all: an endless battle of contrasting memories.  ❞ ❝   sometimes i get real lonely sleeping with you.  ❞ ❝  two people can sleep in the same bed and still be alone when they close their eyes.  ❞ ❝  chance encounters are what keep us going.  ❞ ❝  no matter what they wish for, no matter how far they go, people can never be anything but themselves.  ❞ ❝  no matter how far you travel, you can never get away from yourself.  ❞ ❝  i’m a very ordinary human being.  ❞ ❝  i was always hungry for love.  ❞ ❝  i’m a living, breathing human being. of course i’ve been in love.  ❞ ❝  even if we could turn back, we’d probably never end up where we started.  ❞ ❝  what makes us the most normal is knowing that we’re not normal.  ❞ ❝  i’m tired of living unable to love anyone.  ❞ ❝  i don’t have a single friend - not one.  ❞ ❝  a person who is incapable of loving another cannot properly love himself.  ❞ ❝  i don’t care what you do to me, but i don’t want you to hurt me.  ❞ ❝  i’ve had more than enough hurt already in my life, now i want to be happy.  ❞ ❝  most things are forgotten over time.  ❞ ❝  being with her, i feel a pain, like a frozen knife stuck in my chest.  ❞ ❝  it’s an awful pain, but the funny thing is i’m thankful for it.  ❞ ❝  you can hide memories, but you can’t erase the history that produced them.  ❞ ❝  people leave strange little memories of themselves behind when they die.  ❞ ❝  you can keep as quiet as you like, but one of these days somebody is going to find you.  ❞ ❝  find me now, before someone else does.  ❞ ❝  i’m the type of person who doesn’t find it painful to be alone.  ❞ ❝   what we seek is some kind of compensation for what we put up with.  ❞ ❝   even in the smallest events there’s no such thing as coincidence.  ❞ ❝   there is no forgiveness without bloodshed.  ❞ ❝   memory is a funny thing.  ❞ ❝   each person feels pain in his own way, each has his own scars.  ❞ ❝   it wasn’t that we were incompatible, we just had nothing to talk about.  ❞ ❝   for a long time, she held a special place in my heart.  ❞ ❝   dreams shouldn’t control you, you should control them.  ❞ ❝   in dreams, boundaries don’t exist.  ❞ ❝   reality is different, reality bites.  ❞ ❝   when your feelings build up and harden and die inside, then you’re in big trouble.  ❞ ❝   in a sense, i’m the one who ruined me: i did it myself.  ❞ ❝   i’m not sure that has anything to do with love.  ❞ ❝   everyone may be ordinary, but they’re not normal.  ❞ ❝   i guess i’ve been waiting so long that i’m looking for perfection.  ❞ ❝   i am nothing, i have no connection to anything.  ❞ ❝   i’d like to go to a whole different place and become a whole different self.  ❞ ❝   the more we discover, the more we lose ourselves.  ❞ ❝   what seems like a reasonable distance to one person might feel too far to somebody else.  ❞ ❝   loneliness becomes an acid that eats away at you.  ❞ ❝   there are ways of dying that don’t end in funerals.  ❞ ❝   i’ve always done whatever i felt like doing in life.  ❞ ❝   people may try to stop me, and convince me i’m wrong, but i won’t change.  ❞ ❝   as i see it, you are living with something that you keep hidden deep inside.  ❞ ❝   to tell you the truth, i myself carry such things around inside, heavy things. that is how i can see it in you.  ❞ ❝   when i get angry, i tend to break things.  ❞ ❝   i have to write things down to feel i fully comprehend them.  ❞ ❝   we knew exactly what we wanted in each other and even so, it ended.  ❞ ❝   some things in life are too complicated to explain in any language.  ❞ ❝   this is one more piece of advice i have for you: don’t get impatient.  ❞ ❝   you have to realise it’s going to be a long process and that you’ll work on things slowly, one at a time.  ❞ ❝   if they invent a car that runs on stupid jokes, you could go far.  ❞ ❝   stop eating yourself up alive. ❞ ❝   things will go where they’re supposed to go if you just let them take their natural course. ❞ ❝   truth is often accompanied by intense pain. ❞ ❝   i’ve been lonely for so long, and i’ve been hurt so deeply. ❞ ❝   if only i could have met you again a long time ago. ❞ ❝   we needed that much time to understand how lonely we really were. ❞ ❝   danger may be lurking there, something that may end up wounding me deeply, fatally. ❞ ❝   i might end up losing everything but there’s no turning back. ❞ ❝   i can only go with the flow, even if it means i’ll be burned up, gone forever. ❞ ❝   if you really want to know something, you have to be willing to pay the price. ❞ ❝   life is a lot more fragile than we think.  ❞ ❝   treat others in a way that leaves no regrets. fairly, and if possible, sincerely. ❞ ❝   it’s easy to forget things we don’t need anymore. ❞ ❝   hatred is like a long, dark shadow. in most cases. It is like a two-edged sword: when you cut the other person, you cut yourself. ❞ ❝   please be careful, _____. it is very dangerous. ❞ ❝   once it has taken root in your heart, hatred is the most difficult thing in the world to shake off. ❞ ❝   i wasn’t in love with her. and she didn’t love me. ❞ ❝   when you fall in love, the natural thing to do is give yourself to it. ❞ ❝   being able to feel pain is good. it’s when you can’t even feel pain anymore that you’re in real trouble. ❞ ❝   time moves in its own special way in the middle of the night. ❞ ❝   no matter how honestly you open up to someone, there are still things you cannot reveal. ❞ ❝   what i needed was to be held by someone, anyone. ❞ ❝   i’m a coward when it comes to matters of the heart. that is my fatal flaw. ❞ ❝   all i know is i’m totally alone, all alone in an unfamiliar place. ❞ ❝   falling in love is always a pretty crazy thing. ❞ ❝   if i have left a wound inside you, it is not just your wound but mine as well. ❞ ❝   everyone, deep in their hearts, is waiting for the end of the world to come. ❞ ❝   i’ll never see them again, i know that. they know that as well. ❞ ❝   once that flame goes out, it’s gone forever. ❞ ❝   i’ll never see them again, i know that. they know that as well. ❞ ❝   as long as there’s such a thing as time, everybody’s damaged in the end. ❞ ❝   unclose your mind, you are not a prisoner.  ❞ ❝   you are a bird in fight, searching the skies for dreams. ❞ ❝   girls are beautiful, like dreams. ❞ ❝   but why should you be interested in me? ❞ ❝   with luck, it might even snow for us. ❞ ❝   a gentleman is someone who does not what he wants to do, but what he should do. ❞ ❝   we felt something for each other from the beginning. ❞ ❝   life is so uncertain: you never know what could happen. ❞ ❝   i think that my job is to observe people and the world, and not to judge them. ❞ ❝   there are some things about myself i can’t explain to anyone. ❞ ❝   if i start thinking about these things in too much detail, it gets scary. ❞ ❝   when i get scared, i hurt people without meaning to. ❞ ❝   i’m not such a wonderful human being. ❞ ❝   people fall in love without reason, without even wanting to. you can’t predict it. that’s love. ❞ ❝   please remember: things are not what they seem. ❞ ❝   never let fear and stupid pride make you lose someone who’s precious to you. ❞ ❝   maybe i am fated to always be alone. ❞ ❝   people come to me, but in the end they always leave. ❞ ❝   there are lots of different ways to live and lots of different ways to die. ❞ ❝   i’ve built a wall around me, never letting anybody inside and trying not to venture outside myself. ❞ ❝   why are you so spaced out? you still haven’t answered me.  ❞ ❝   love can rebuild the world, they say, so everything’s possible when it comes to love. ❞ ❝   how much do you love me? ❞ ❝   i’m not totally mad at you, i’m just sad.  ❞ ❝   we survived, you and i.  ❞ ❝   our duty is to do our best to keep on living, even if our lives are not perfect.  ❞ ❝   what a wonderful thing it is to find and be found by your perfect other.  ❞ ❝   why do you even have to ask?  ❞ ❝   i wish i had fallen in love with somebody a little more handsome, but i didn’t. i fell in love with you!  ❞ ❝   the dead will always be dead, but we have to go on living.  ❞ ❝   whenever i feel like crying, i become angry instead.  ❞ ❝   i don’t know, there’s just something about you.  ❞ ❝   i’ve never met someone that thinks like you.  ❞ ❝   violence does not always take a visible form, and not all wounds gush blood.  ❞ ❝   the scenery may change, but i’m still the same old incomplete person.  ❞ ❝   losing you is most difficult for me.  ❞ ❝   i am a flawed human being - a far more flawed human being than you realise.  ❞ ❝  once you let yourself grow close to someone, cutting the ties is painful.  ❞ ❝  we’re all kind of weird and twisted and drowning.  ❞ ❝  the ability to have complete faith in another human being is one of the finest qualities a person can possess.  ❞ ❝  people leave traces of themselves where they feel most comfortable, most worthwhile.  ❞ ❝  some things are forgotten, some things disappear, some things die.  ❞ ❝  you can’t choose how you’re born but you can choose how you die.  ❞

[deiforme]

𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 :  james rarely goes out of his way to approach others first, save for the vulnerable and weak of heart, individuals that simply intrigue him, or those who he sees have potential to be of use to him ; he is intended as a highly elusive figure.  to preserve the parallels / imagery and heavy deific metaphors for this blog and remain true to the general nature of his character, ask memes and pre-established / plotted interactions are usually the best bet to get a thread going here ! starter calls will be seldom seen, as james is tricky to write impromptu starters for, due to the aforementioned reasons.

[deiforme]

━━     [ █/█/2011. 00:00 𝙰𝙼 : 𝚂𝙾𝙼𝙴𝙿𝙻𝙰𝙲𝙴 𝙸𝙽 𝚂𝙴𝙾𝚄𝙻. 𝙰 𝙻𝙸𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙰𝙻 𝚂𝙿𝙰𝙲𝙴. 𝙰𝙽 𝙰𝙻𝙻𝙴𝚈𝚆𝙰𝚈. 𝙶𝙾𝙳 𝙼𝙴𝙴𝚃𝚂 𝙼𝙰𝙽, 𝚂𝙾𝙾𝙽 𝚃𝙾 𝙱𝙴 𝙿𝚁𝙾𝙿𝙷𝙴𝚃. ]

PLEASE DO NOT REBLOG / COPY / DRAW INSPO FROM .

THE SCENE IS SET INTO MOTION :  two pieces without prior contact now stand aligned side by side on a chess board. a moth to flame, a magnet to metal. this is no consequence, but rather the unfolding of nature, the innate law of attraction. even gods are not without prayer.

the budding deity takes a step closer to the light, towards the other figure. the man he faces is roughly his age, shadows wreathing his eyes, rain-soaked bangs plastered to his forehead. he reeks of death, or rather the remnants of it. james can envision it now— the ominous, all-consuming presence of death, its curled tendrils poised and ready to strike, yet staunching their assault. as though sensing untapped potential, the heavens have decreed that his time has yet to come. he will survive to see the future, for now— he is the prophet, soon to be ordained. 

his eyes are glossy like pools of chromite, hardened like the polished barrel of a gun. james supposes this is an omen. gunfire hearkens him back to a time where he had no duty to fulfil, none other than existence as the prodigal son. a flurry of crows gather, perched against the backdrop of crimson and orange that overlays the sky. 

[ 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐂𝐊 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐎𝐎𝐑 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐁𝐄 𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔 . ]

the man before him introduces himself— tries to do so. the memory fails to take shape, no more than hazy fragments that come and go, as if the man’s life experiences were no more than a dream. the only confirmation that this is indeed reality are the multitude of scars branded into his flesh. although he tries, head pounding like the walls in a thriving nightclub, he is unable to conjure up any semblance of explanation as to how he came to be here, why he is there, or even his own name. and yet, the single word he speaks conveys far more to james than any detail. it rattles him to the core, as though someone has struck an out-of-place chord in a harmony— a single, discordant sound with a power to shake the heavens.

❝  𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑖𝑠. ❞

this is his ecdysis : a fresh slate, a new identity, a new purpose.  a chance to start all over again. this is a rare instance where james feels pity, empathy, akin to what he knows of friendship. looking the stranger in the eye, he is met with the same hollowness he found himself staring back at in the mirror in the aftermath of his parents’ passing. perhaps this is why he takes pity on this stranger— an echoed vision of his past self, brimming with untapped potential.  he can rebuild this man, help him rise from the ashes again, baptise him in righteousness. for a god is no god with no believers, and scripture cannot be built on soliloquy.  his hand, although empty, feels heavy as he extends it in offering. 

❝  𝙸 𝙲𝙰𝙽 𝙾𝙽𝙻𝚈 𝚂𝙾𝚆 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚂𝙴𝙴𝙳𝚂. 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚃 𝙸𝚂 𝚄𝙿 𝚃𝙾 𝚈𝙾𝚄— 𝚆𝙸𝙻𝙻 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙹𝙾𝙸𝙽 𝙼𝙴 ? ❞

the heavens quiver once again at the response he receives.

[hcnnibal]

embracing my god complex by changing my pronouns from he/him to He/Him

[deiforme]

this is it. this is the casual james vibe. hair down / unstyled and (reading) glasses.

[torridturncoat]

god (self-diagnosed)