no

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Emmett chewed the inside of their cheek as he recounted the story, heart aching. It might be ignorant of them to think the whole thing so senseless, but when Axel admitted that none of them even knew why the clans were fighting anymore, it made their muscles tense in frustration and protective anger.

Look how Axel had been hurt, and for what? What had it accomplished? Emmett might not have experience with Strigha venom, but they’d seen the rare timber rattler bite before. Axel had to have been in so much pain, been so afraid. She could feel the echoes of the past wrapped up in the retelling and the burr of his voice. They hated the person who tried to rob him of it and everything else.

“Anybody can be vicious.” Emm murmured in soft defense. “And can choose not to be.” The choice was important. Someone had made the choice to hurt him, and her, with intent to kill. Even having seen Axel fight, seen him in the dirt and grime and snow and blood while she was at her worst–he hit. He kicked. He threatened. And nobody died.

She cried so easy anymore, but she was trying not to right now, worried he’d censor himself to save her feelings. She could not help the tightness with which she gripped the coffee cup and his hand. “How did you live? What happened after?”

Axel spared a warm smile at her before his free hand found her side and gently rubbed it in a long vertical motion. “Didn’t think I was at first. It was the worst pain I’d ever felt. They dragged me to a hospital next door. Luckily there are Strigha on staff there, other clan members, who were able to grab me before humans could. They had some antivenom on hand. For all the fighting we did, it was understood that both clans made donations of venom to the hospital for that kind of thing. The guy who got me had a family member on file for it. I got lucky. 

“I was in the hospital for weeks. Had to relearn how to walk, move, talk... did a lot of physical therapy. It gave me a...” He trailed and flicked his wings in an unspoken bout of Strigha body language. “... Appreciation for that sort of thing, so I decided to go to school for it.”

He squeezed Emmett’s hand. Axel wasn’t accustomed to trying to explain his deeper feelings about what happened because he didn’t trust himself with words that well, but he’d make an effort.

“It changed me, in good and bad ways. Felt like I was two different people sometimes. And, y’know, before then, I thought we weren’t so different from humans. All the fighting was just posturing, right? But when that happened it felt like I was seeing what I was for the first time. Something vicious. Dangerous. 

“Guess that’s when I lost my place in the world. Thought maybe I could prove to myself I could be something else... but you know how that went.”

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Emm shifted around in his embrace to face him more fully, following the trail of his hand across his own skin. His lack of anxiety or fear about the topic soothed their own. It was alright.

“Any of it. All of it.” Emmett felt the need to qualify whatever you’re comfortable with and swallowed it down. Axel knew they wouldn’t press too hard, that they never pressed on these things. They were afraid of being too much too fast and losing him.

But…they weren’t going to lose him. It felt good to believe the truth in that.

He couldn’t help but feel proud of Emmett for asking. It felt like comfort and trust, which is what Axel felt with them and Gardner both. Shit. He was soft, huh? ‘Course he was.

One thing he loved about them is they reminded him of that.

Axel tilted his head back and forth in thought. “Hmm. Let’s see... Got it when I was seventeen, so it’s been with me a while. Back in Las Cruces there are two Strigha clans. Sometimes clans close together can get along, ‘specially if they’re related. Sometimes not.

“My clan--” His old clan? “--and this other one... they've got a rivalry going all the way back to Vampiru. Old blood. Couldn’t tell you what started it. I don’t even think anyone remembers.

“Anyway, things get violent sometimes. I was out with some friends--other clan members--when we ran into a group from the other. Tensions were high. Ended up getting into a fight.” Axel paused. “It got bad.”

He took a moment to arrange his thoughts and check in on his emotions. They were still even--this had been a long time ago, after all--but there was a weight and rawness to them, too; as permeating as the mark on his skin that’d been left behind.

“People who say Strigha are vicious aren’t always full of shit." There was a churn to his stomach. “You find other ways to get a message across when your teeth can kill a man in minutes or less. ‘Least, you’re supposed to.” Axel tapped two fingertips against his neck in a pointed gesture.

“One of ‘em went for my throat. Almost died.”

[deletethis]

JSYK

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Emm felt the tension and its slow release. It reminded her of the thorned vines he’d tattooed on himself. They felt like intentional reminders of his inner turmoil, as stark as her own scars.

“Someday.” Emm agreed, but it had the taste of a lie to it. They washed that down with more coffee, trying to find something else to focus on. But their mind kept falling back into the forest, to scars. Even the gentle pressure of his hand couldn’t distract her, reminding her of every time she’d dodged the opportunity for his healing hands out of fear.

“Can I ask about your scar?” The question was practically blurted out to break the silence, like she’d intended to continue their discussion or broach a different topic and this had wormed its way in. The fear of intruding and becoming too personal with Axel, however, had worn further down than another.

Axel’s bright blue eyes drifted up from looking down at their hands to find Emmett’s. He cocked his head.

It wasn’t a question he’d expected, but instead of being surprised or shocked the Strigha simply smiled in his wide, close-lipped way that made his eyes crease with a spark.

“‘Course you can.” This was spoken in a soft burr. Axel lifted his free hand, coffee set aside, and ran a thumb along the side of his neck. It jumped toward the front before tapping at the dark skin there--skin that was roughened by old scar tissue. “Want to know how I got it, or something else?”

He didn’t mind talking about it. Axel was actually a lot more relaxed about this than he’d anticipated. If anything, the question came as a strange relief.

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Emmett did fall into him at the invitation, and any apologies died on her tongue next to his warmth. She set the juicebox aside for the coffee cup and liked the familiarity of it, even if the moments where she’d drop by before work and they’d get wrapped up like this had only just begun before they’d both had to put their lives on hold.

She took a sip and let the warmth slip in, just hazelnut creamer and coffee. Strong enough for her to taste which, since it was on her mind, reminded her it was probably stronger than she used to take it. She set the cup down.

“Yeah, just…” She motioned one hand at the forest in the near distance. When it dropped, she searched for his. “I miss it. I used to spend all my spare time in there, you know? It–” made her a good target “–was something I really enjoyed.”

Emmett’s hand found what it was looking for. Axel ran warm fingertips across her knuckles and hummed a thoughtful note as he looked out over that same distant forest. A single wing tucked at her back, loose enough for her to move around but solid enough to remind Emmett it was there.

Axel knew he wasn’t the best at this--or suspected? Gardner and Emmett were convincing. They were also better at talking than he was, but shit. He felt his chest tighten up like a sudden fingerspin of tension around a thread. Some things were too important to let go.

“Yeah.” Axel turned each word over before speaking, pausing only to pepper a light kiss on top of Emmett’s wavy hair. “... I’m sorry.”

The knuckle brush slowed into a gentle, massaging drift.

“If it’s something you want... one day you can go back. On your own terms. Your own time.” Axel exhaled quietly, the thread unspinning. Steady. “Whatever you want, we’ll find a way."

[lambonthealtar]

deletethis​:

Axel followed the stairs up through their spirals and made his way through twining halls following the traces left behind from Emmett’s steps. He hadn’t seen them in the basement (or the haunted doll room–yes, he’d checked.) The more he looked, the more curious he became when his steps carried him further up.

… Curious, and heavy. The weight of the month hung heavy on them all, those who knew. Emmett’s gazes had sometimes trailed distant and her feet tread the floors when things were quiet. Gardner had noticed it, too.

And up Axel went.

He had fond memories of a similar journey made one October night. Axel caught sight of the last vestiges of a sunset fading across the mansion floors and slid one one heel into the room, coffee in each hand. (Still hot.)

What? It counted as morning for vampires, and it was a little tradition they didn’t have to give up just ‘cause he and Emmett were living at Valsur’s for now. Maybe there was a twist to it–Joy had been the one to bring the coffee by Axel’s work more often than not, but hey. He can make up for lost time.

He saw them on the balcony. Fading light streaked the pastel colors in their hair and smoothed across their skin. Axel wasn’t blind to the scars Emmett bore, never had been, but they weren’t what he saw.

But he did see tension in their shoulders and hear the faint strain of practiced breaths. As he approached the balcony the forest grew more expansive in the horizon that stretched around them. The Strigha’s brows pinched once before his expression smoothed out and he adjusted his approach so Emm could hear him coming. His drifting steps drew closer.

“Hey.” Axel did another small pivot next to Emm and stretched his elbow against the balcony railing. “See you’ve got juice.” He set the coffee up on the railing next to him and smiled warmly at her.

Emmett was grateful Axel had let them know he was there and approaching. The strain of forcing themself to be okay might have made them fright right out of their skin and clatter their bones down the rooftop if he’d surprised them. As it was, he got a smile that managed to climb to their eyes thanks only to his influence.

“Hey.” They saw the coffee but offered him their juicebox anyway. An aesthetically cartoony citrus fruit was split open and the segments distorted into fangs on the front. Blood orange. “I could use the caffeine, if you’re offering.”

Double edged sword, caffeine. Bad for anxiety, but good for keeping her functional when she’s not sleeping well.

They shifted to face him, turning away from the forest. It was hard to explain how fragile they felt in exactly that moment. Axel always exuded a beautiful, fluid strength that made them acutely aware of what a bumbling, clumsy, land-bound creature they were. Their current emotional instability compounded it until they felt like crumbling into him and apologizing for the mess.

“Is Gardner still in bed?” was what they chose to ask instead.

[deletethis]

“A beautiful man needs his beauty sleep,” Axel teased while sliding the coffee closer. It was made how Emm liked it in the fashion of the throwaway cups they’d always used before. He inspected the juice box and smiled. Cute shit.

Axel’s blue eyes flicked back to Emmett and he tilted his head before extending one arm toward her in quiet invitation for her to lean on him if she wanted. The wing on that side fluttered at the edges and draped—an equally unspoken bit of Strigha body language that spoke of concern and comfort.

”Thinking?” He asked in a quiet burr. Of course they were. Still, it was a start.

[lambonthealtar]

Old Scars

The forest looked different from up here.

Emm leaned against the railing on one of Valsur’s highest balconies with a juice box in her hand, looking out over the trees that stretched beyond his property. The sun was almost done dipping past the horizon, its pinks and golds giving away to deep blue and purple. Out here, a few stars were even visible.

Emm shivered. Was it different enough, though?

She still couldn’t go out in the woods very far, couldn’t stand to be surrounded by trees. It wasn’t even proper fear, though that was an easy word for it. It was pressure, a reminder of what she’d gone through, a paranoia that it could happen again (and it had, even if not in the forest, and so that didn’t help, did it?). Once the pressure got heavy, that’s when the fear settled in, bone deep.

On a nearby rooftop ridge sat several crows who had inexplicably followed her here. Mordecai was among them. She chose not to question it for right now. Instead she took a deep breath in, and a slow breath out. Repeat it, keep looking at the trees.

It had to get better. If she just forced herself long enough, it’d get better.

[deletethis]

Axel followed the stairs up through their spirals and made his way through twining halls following the traces left behind from Emmett’s steps. He hadn’t seen them in the basement (or the haunted doll room--yes, he’d checked.) The more he looked, the more curious he became when his steps carried him further up.

... Curious, and heavy. The weight of the month hung heavy on them all, those who knew. Emmett’s gazes had sometimes trailed distant and her feet tread the floors when things were quiet. Gardner had noticed it, too.

And up Axel went.

He had fond memories of a similar journey made one October night. Axel caught sight of the last vestiges of a sunset fading across the mansion floors and slid one one heel into the room, coffee in each hand. (Still hot.)

What? It counted as morning for vampires, and it was a little tradition they didn’t have to give up just ‘cause he and Emmett were living at Valsur’s for now. Maybe there was a twist to it--Joy had been the one to bring the coffee by Axel’s work more often than not, but hey. He can make up for lost time.

He saw them on the balcony. Fading light streaked the pastel colors in their hair and smoothed across their skin. Axel wasn’t blind to the scars Emmett bore, never had been, but they weren’t what he saw.

But he did see tension in their shoulders and hear the faint strain of practiced breaths. As he approached the balcony the forest grew more expansive in the horizon that stretched around them. The Strigha’s brows pinched once before his expression smoothed out and he adjusted his approach so Emm could hear him coming. His drifting steps drew closer.

“Hey.” Axel did another small pivot next to Emm and stretched his elbow against the balcony railing. “See you’ve got juice.” He set the coffee up on the railing next to him and smiled warmly at her.

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Guilt still sat heavy for Emmett as if they had caused all this themself. Time and again they were the one being comforted when, at least this time, this was really about Gardner. She could feel how it affected both of them like a sad little misery sponge.

“I don’t want to go looking for a fight. But I’m tired of them coming to me.” Emmett said quietly, trying to be reassuring. The proximity of both of them helped, feeling them talk as well as hearing it. “So…if the pot’s getting stirred, I think self-defense sounds good.”

She was also thinking about the guns locked up in her basement, but they didn’t have to worry about that right now. Very, very last resort kind of thing.

“I also want to be able to protect the two of you.” This was even quieter. “Because it seems like it’s constantly the other way around.”

xxonegoodarmxx​:

A guaranteed intervention from the Strigha sent a flutter of anxiety through Gardner. What, were they going to prepare for full on street fights? No… that probably wasn’t fair to assume. Even if it was what the Ocularis deserved.

He didn’t want them hurting Axel’s family. If the Regulators got involved, and with Axel already having a history…

Gardner exhaled and rubbed his brow. He’d have to talk it out with him later. There were a lot of steps they had to take, later.

“Let’s train then,” he relented, deciding to veer from the heavy stuff. “Sounds like it’ll be a lot of touching and bumping which I won’t say no to.”

Axel suddenly laughed, rough and loud. Leave it to Gardner to break the bubble. Shit, he’d needed that.

“You’d know something about both.” His tail slid and fell over Emmet and Gardner both in a fluttery and fond drape. “Let's see here...”

Axel pretended to pull out an imaginary note pad and pen with semi-occupied hands. He tapped the ‘pen’ against the pad and feigned flipping through a few pages.

“I like to keep the newbies paired up, so... look at that. Looks like both of you get to train with each other.” He flicked the ‘pen’ away with a quick roll of his wrist. “I’m sure you’ll both behave.”

The chuckles in his chest finally subsided enough to add: “You’ve both done more for me than I ever expected. Won’t say no to giving you more tools to protect what you love.”

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

“Oh no, halbi…” Emm sighed, frustrated, moments before a soft, fond oof at being smooshed into the center of the two of them, the warmth of Gardner’s kiss lingering on her temple. “He’s going to be upset.”

“I…don’t know, maybe they just don’t see you interacting with other Strigha and think there’s no issue.” Emm didn’t know how it all worked, but Axel and Gardner would know best about both sides of this clusterfuck. She was the weak link with very little to bring to the table outside of her questionable personal charms.

Oh. That thought made her chest go tight.

“While we’re here, though. Um.” Emm cleared her throat, not looking at either of them. Her hand came down from Gardner’s cheek to run along Axel’s arm. “I froze up again. I keep…I keep freezing up. Can we work on, I dunno, self-defense? Once we get more important things figured out.”

xxonegoodarmxx​:

“They don’t care who’s behind it because they got the Regulators on their side. They think they’re on top,” Gardner explained simply. It always put a bad taste in his mouth to talk about the Ocularis. Knowing everything about them still made him feel dirty. “And we’re keepin’ your grandad away from this. I can see them being shitheels and trying to bring attention to the fact he’s human, without knowing any of the facts.”

Ugh. He nuzzled his nose into Emmett’s hair. He considered her question for a long few moments. “If you want,” he said quietly. “I just don’t recommend fighting the Ocularis. I mean, physically fighting. They’ll use any evidence they can to report you to the Regs. I still want you safe, though.”

Axel huffed a quiet chuckle from deep in his chest. “They got more to fear from grandad. He’s gonna find out about this, then go home and tell the clan about it. The pot’s about to get stirred... Guaranteed.”

He raised a hand and squeezed theirs.

“I’ll teach you both a thing or two. Self-defense.” Axel’s even, steady voice adopted a protective burr. “No one’s touching either of you.”

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

As Axel reassured Gardner, she felt that strong bond between all of them rise up like a wave. It was always a marvel, how emotions felt and changed and moved. Months down the line, she could appreciate that more. Love was its own emotion that truly did feel like liquid. It had an ebb and flow, occasionally overwhelming and sometimes just a gentle stream. It mixed in joy and concern, so many other feelings, sometimes like seafoam and others like sharp fizzy bubbles.

And this they’d only experienced directed at themself in such an intense, unguarded way for a few weeks now. They’d felt love between others, or fond, kindly, familiar love from so many friends. But this was special.

They were definitely going to cry soon.

“No one’s going to leave you,” Emm whispered in affirmation to Gardner, looking from his downturned eyes to Axel’s intense blues and back. She gently tapped his cheek with her knuckle. “I…don’t know what I want to do about the rest of it yet. I’ll think on it. But Axel’s right.”

xxonegoodarmxx​:

“I know,” Gardner assured them. His hand slid down to grab Axel’s wrist and he ineffectually tugged on it, wriggling himself closer into the sandwich. “You had yer chance a long time ago. Hard to go back after a suicide space mission.”

Gardner landed another peck on Emm’s forehead. His unspoken caveat was that the Ocularis were his responsibility, but it was too early to know where all the pieces fell in place.

“Are you good, Axel? Staying here, at least until we have a better plan.”

Axel was initially quiet as he thought. There was a part of him that wanted to be stubborn and insist he’d be fine, but if Gardner and Emmett were both here for their own safety then he wanted to make sure they stayed safe.

So, turned out it wasn’t so difficult to decide after all.

“I’ll stay. Feels better sticking close.” The especially after... was unspoken but lingered in the way his touch did against Emmett. He sighed and threw his arm over Emm and Gardner both to squish their sandwich in tight and secure.

“... Gotta figure out grandad. He was staying all summer and is gonna be a pill about the Ocularis.” His brows drew in.

“Figure they’d know better than to try anything when there’s a Strigha clan behind it.” Shit. Axel needed to inform his parents, semi-estranged as he was (in a complex, amiable? way.) This could get complicated if his mother was inclined to direct action.

[deletethis]

i see now. this was the plan >all along<. you cannot be trusted. top conspirator.

don’t worry i’ve trained for this ever since you told me about spirited englishwomen fleeing into the wilds of scotland. though you might feel spirited one day. can’t be too careful.

thanks. it’s been rough since five minutes ago when i saw my partners livestreaming getting lost on social media

they cannot act right, queen. it’s like herding cats down here.

[deletethis]

and now they’re both gone

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Eye contact and gentle touches were always her undoing. Could Emmett get through one time seeing the two of them that they didn’t break out in tears? She sniffed, gray eyes wet and shimmering, feeling like she was shrinking into herself. This was the kindness and understanding she always avoided, no matter how much she wanted it. Because she hadn’t felt she deserved it.

They found it disconcertingly comforting in its own unfortunate way to slip back into those old thought patterns and dredge up all the terrible reasons confirming them. It was something they wanted to talk to Axel and Gardner about, eventually. But, instead, they decided it was good enough right now to simply fight them off. They didn’t want to add that cherry on top of their clusterfuck sundae.

“…Okay.” They sniffed, and took a deep breath. Gently, they squeezed Axel’s hand in theirs, and reached up rest their free one on Gardner’s cheek. “Okay. Maybe…I shouldn’t panic exit right now. Especially not while we’re figuring this out. I want to be there for you, too.”

xxonegoodarmxx​:

He gave a small nod and moved his hand to lay over Axel and Emmett’s. “The, uhm… The only thing I’d want you to worry about, as far as leaving, is if it’s too much. I don’t think you can do anything wrong, Emm. But it’s not even been a year and makin’ a hard pivot to worrying about aliens and space is a lot.” Gardner broke eye contact for a moment self-consciously. “Deciding to be with me isn’t gonna make that easier, but, y’know. Just don’t put so much pressure on yourself.”

Axel’s tail flicked in agreement and fell over their ankles. “Being with you isn’t something either of us will be reconsidering.” There was a smile in Axel’s voice and his thumb brushed against both Emmett’s and Gardner’s hands.

“But he’s right. If you want to relax the responsibility a little, no one would question it. You do a lot for everyone. Don’t burn yourself out.” He squeezed. “We’ll back you up.”

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Emmett felt the immediate need to backtrack what they’d said and brush it off. If they hadn’t expected her to say that, they must not want it, and who was she to say it at all? Her eyes scrunched up and she took a breath as she rolled in between them. It’d be wonderful to fall back on old habits right now that screamed let’s stop talking about the hard stuff and makeout.

But self-destructive habits were what had them on this edge in the first place. They fidgeted, looking for hands to hold.

“I feel like I’m always two steps away from pissing the wrong person off. Or, you know, just another person. I haven’t talked to Alex since after Lilius. When I’ve messaged Wilmore, it’s only been about bad news. I’m…” Emm struggled to figure out how to say what they needed to without sounding like they were whining. “I thought I had a handle on things and then got blindsided again.

“And…I just realized I hadn’t been deleting messages or hiding them. And those guys, they tried to get my phone. I could have messed things up for everyone, and I froze, and…” Their voice cracked. They could have gotten Axel and Gardner and everyone they cared about killed.

xxonegoodarmxx​:

Gardner crinkled his brow with concern and shimmied himself onto his side. “No, hey. None of this is normal and you have no reason to be prepared for it. I feel like you…” He hesitated, a sigh rushing from his nose. “You got a real rough introduction into all this. This world. You shouldn’t be under so much pressure to be doin’ everything right.”

He slipped his hand under Emm’s jaw and looked her in the eyes. It was an intense look, clouded with inwardly-aimed frustration that yes, of course being an Ocularis would invite so much danger into all of his loved one’s lives. And mixed with it was a plead for Emm to not blame herself for it.

“Besides that… the group isn’t something you get kicked out of just for hurting someone’s feelings. All you’ve done is speak your mind. Right? You’re doing fine.”

Axel made a soft, agreeing noise before his free arm moved down to thread with the hand Emmett held closest to him. The rest of his body shifted until he was also on his side, though the arm supporting Gardner’s head didn’t move.

“We need that,” Axel murmured. “What you have. That honesty. Perspective--when you want to give it. That said, I haven’t been deleting my shit either...” The hand squeezed and he released a sigh. “We’re learning and adapting, doing the best we can. We’ve got each other. That’ll get us through.”

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

Axel started it by laying back on the bed–Emm leaned into Gardner’s chest, wanting to follow suit. It was a fraught discussion, full of nerves she was soaking in steadily. Better to handle that heart to heart to heart.

“That’s somewhere to start. Run it by the group, see what everyone else says.” Emm had told Logan what happened, who told Skipper, but the idea of having to make an announcement made their chest compress. They’d been avoiding talking in the chat since Vic.

“…Maybe I shouldn’t be involved in the group anymore, though.”

xxonegoodarmxx​:

Taking the hint, Gardner carefully lowered himself back down, until the final two inch drop which squashed him with an oof. He let Emm slide down to be between himself and Axel if they wanted.

He also shot them a disbelieving look. “What? Why?”

Axel lifted his chin and squinted above the well-defined slop of his chest at Emm and Gardner. “Would love to know that, too.” His arm had slithered out and been waiting for Gardner’s drop.

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

“It’s a lot to ask.” Emmett chewed the inside of their cheek, thinking. Their gaze fell on Axel’s tail, wishing they could soothe one or both of them from this trouble she’d dragged into their laps. Quite literally for Gardner, considering where she was sitting. “And don’t they hate dealing with people outside the Ocularis?”

They didn’t know any other Ocularis. The only other option also was a dead end, unless… “Does anyone know any other Regs on our side? Because, that’s the only people they listen to.” And Lorna was gone, Isfet wasn’t ‘official’. It was becoming clear that Lilius had cost a lot of resources.

xxonegoodarmxx​:

“We’ve asked and done more,” he said pointedly. “I told everyone the Ocularis will be more active after we saved Charlie. We need to be careful.”

He adjusted his hold around Emmett. Another Reg would be perfect, actually. Somewhere in the back of his mind he felt like one had been mentioned at some point. “We’ll ask the group. Get ideas. That’s what we’re supposed to do.”

Axel forced his body to unknot and leaned back onto the bed. He folded his arms behind his head and tried to... think. Not exactly his strength. He was upfront and practical--a fighter. Not a strategist.

He wasn’t exactly fond of any of the Regulators, but he knew a name or two. “Skittles likes the one called Susette.” His eyes flicked over. “Big endorsement from a Sibyl.”

[deletethis]

lambonthealtar​:

“Nobody’s fault but theirs.” Emm agreed. Resentment bubbled up in her chest against Gardner’s family. For making him hide. For making all of them hide. …Though, if she’d just played this smarter, there’s a good chance they wouldn’t be here trying to figure this out.

“I don’t want to assume for Valsur. We can…talk to him later. Maybe a bunch of people can just take a few pets each.” They also didn’t want to get up, instead wanting to sink further into the two of them. Thanks to their empathy and meds the panic attack was a fuzzy memory, but it didn’t change what had happened. She’d frozen again, and Gardner’s life had been on the line.

And not just his. Anyone who had info on their phone. They shivered.

“But, um. I guess now we’ll have a lot of time together.” The joke’s (the truth’s?) delivery was hesitant, Emm bouncing along with Gardner’s knee. They had a headache, too. Some wonderful quality time this would be, with everyone all twisted up inside.

xxonegoodarmxx​:

“Yeah.” He wanted to say something else, a quip about using Valsur’s kitchen or the King-sized bed he was given, but the dark clouds about his situation swarmed at record pace. Gardner let out a frustrated sigh. “But seriously, for the sake of the entire group, we need to keep eyes on the Ocularis. Even if it wasn’t me, Charlie showin’ up and escaping for the second time is gonna set them loose like plague rats. Always looking for a big score.”

Axel’s tail whipped between his feet. It’d be nice to have someone who was an in when it came to the Ocularis. Couldn’t be Gardner, not anymore--he’d had to endure that long enough already--but not having insight into their machine did reveal a blindspot that, after Emm’s encounter, was too much to ignore.

Couldn’t be any of them.

“Any thoughts on how we could do that? The kind of people who’d be up for it?”