Hannah.Paige

Maybe I just can't be loved.

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But darling you are not Alice, and this is not wonderland.

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… it’s there every day…

Monday she wakes up - her heart pounding from her chest,

Tuesday she wants to burn the pain and just forget,

Wednesday is that day her self hate would now grow,

Thursday she would ponder on the love she'd never know,

Friday was the day she finally let herself cry,

And Saturday was the day that inside she would die.

So here we are at Sunday.

Welcome to her funeral.

Take a seat and think of how it broke her heart over and over. Every. Day.

But the sad thing is, even her funeral was less depressing than she was.

[quotefeeling]

“If you break someone and they still wish you the best, you’ve lost the greatest thing for you”

— Unknown

[thepersonalquotes]

[thepersonalquotes]

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I think I’m really broken by now. By eighteen I think I’m really fucked up. Eighteen years of life is so little but what’s the purpose of another pointless eighteen years when by the end all I am is a bloody nut job. A psycho who should be in a mental home as he says. Just someone who should’ve gone through with it and just killed themselves the other night. I wish you never followed. I wish I had succeeded. I wish that I could go back 16 years to the days I held a real smile, back to the days I had a family, back to the days I was too little to know what stress was and what destruction it came with, back to the times I woke up in the morning ready for a day full of hopes and dreams.

I can’t remember what it was like to have dreams, to want to be a gymnast or a teacher, a footballer or a barbour. Because now all I can wish to be is a good person. The women who I was brought up to be, the kind, gentle warming person I set out to be. But it’s so hard when you get targeted because of your weaknesses, when it’s ‘funny’ to laugh at someone’s depression, it’s funny to say things about people’s insecurities just to get a reaction out of them. You know what? It’s far from funny because those saying this are the people who ruin lives, those are the people who go to bed at night and wonder where everyone went, those are the most lonely people. I hope they end up lonely, I hope they go to bed at night knowing that people left because of how they treated them. However, i hope you thenfore find happiness after throwing away those nasty comments, treating people with respect and I hope you can learn from your mistakes because to be the reason another person is broken is one I couldn’t live with. Knowing that someone is scared to leave their house because of what you let others believe about them, knowing that someone cries themselves to sleep every night and no one knows because of what you did to them, knowing that someone no longer has friends because they can’t tell the difference between friend and foe anymore because of what you say about them. Just imagine if you were the reason someone was like this. Imagine if you were the person who was like this because of another being. It’s fucked. It’s all just fucked. It’s fucked because there are people like this out there and a lot suffer in silence, I should know because I am this person, I’m the one who doesn’t know who friends are anymore, I’m the one who cries every single day because I’m unhappy, I’m the one who’s broken. Don’t be the person to break another person because hunni I promise no matter how much you run others down it does not make you look any better. That’s a promise.

Please, please, don’t be that person to ruin another person. We are all equal and everyone deserves love, so love hard and remember, we all deserve a chance.

[thepersonalquotes]

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Hits. Home.

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[thepersonalquotes]

[extramadness]

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One word can sum up a whole person.

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Be with someone who you can sit and watch sunsets with, but tells you you’re the most beautiful view in sight… So i like this because it reminds me of you. You would stare at me for so much time i would think you were going crazy, however when i asked you why… you just smiled at me and told me I’m beautiful as if it was a normal thing i heard everyday, little did you know, i hadn’t been told that as many times as i have fingers on my left hand, but you, that one from you couldn’t come close to anything anyone has ever said to me. You were the one star i favoured in the whole damn sky.

[fraagmented]

it makes me sad when people i used to love talking to become people that i don’t want to talk to anymore, just because of small things that happen. and sometimes i still love talking to them but more often than not it feels like i’m talking to a brick wall and just getting “okay"s and "cool"s in response. it’s hard when one of your best friends claims you mean something to them but it doesn’t even feel like you know them anymore

[dailyinspirationquotes]

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[depressed-spooky-betch-blog]

15/04/17

It’s 12:25am and as soon as I looked at that time I knew that today was the day. I knew that when that clock ticked over onto this date that it would break me. The clock that I once peered over at to check how long I had left with you every night has brought a time in which you’re no longer here. Time’s up. It’s ticking and ticking and fucking ticking away the seconds right down these damaged ears of mine that I torture with the loud music to silence out the world, to cover the thoughts of you.

They all think I’m okay now because it is in fact a year since you broke my fragile heart. They think it’s all patched over and covered up enough to make jokes about you or that when I walk past you everyday I don’t still break a little inside. But they don’t think about how I still love you. - - She’s still a little broken, she’s still fragile and torn up from what he did to her, still crying herself to sleep and pulling down her sleeves to cover the marks she had now left upon her beautiful arms that she never deserved. She still thinks about him every morning when she wakes up and every night before she closes her eyes. She still can’t sleep before morning hours because ‘what ifs’ got entwined in her mind just like his fingers used to in her silky hair.

She’s so broken that she still dresses for him, still does her makeup before she leaves the house thinking of how he used to watch her do it and admire her when he thought she didn’t see him there, she still gets lost in his eyes when he’s daydreaming at the soft face of another, she still thinks about him everyday without fail because, well, he never leaves her mind. She still loves him.

I guess the point of this is, well, there is no purpose, no reason, no thought about it, she’s just so in love with him that it hurts. It hurts to breathe because her ribs feel shattered from her heart beating at a stupid pace trying to stop the tears falling. It’s just a broken heart, nothing anyone can help, or fix, the only person to fix it is the person who is long gone, the one who shattered it. She just loves him you see.

But like they all say, it’s just a broken heart. You’ll get over it.

[dailyinspirationquotes]

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