der Schmetterling

talky-feely | TW | not pr0

[der-schmetterling]

°Welcome to my blog~

uhh this is a blog

tw for Erectile Dysfunction, sh, unalive, and nonsense

°°° Hi there c: This is just a place where I dump my thoughts. I am not pr0 anything!!! except for recovery. I believe each and every one of you deserves to feel at home with yourselves <3

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#schmetterlings shit - my shitty shit doodles

#schmetterlings radio - musik

#schmetterlings pov - dumb dream logs

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Timelines I talk about: Sonic, Sun&Moon, Moon era

A Little About Me Myself & I

Call me anything :>) tho let's be real, my user doesn't offer much (literally "the butterfly" I'm crying)

they/it | ancient {(18 ≤ x ≤ 20)} | an aspiring nothing ♪

Stopped talking to my therapist a long time ago yikes.

I'm not German I just like the language even though I don't know it very well :)

safe food: earl grey w oatmilk and a shit ton of stevia

`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~

`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~°'/`~

// Backup: @der-tiefling

[der-schmetterling]

peenut butter cocklate

[lupita-girlblogger]

mein gott

[der-schmetterling]

ohh mein gott!

[der-schmetterling]

Edited post!!!! because I don't want to make a new post for others to see lmao which means I might not make a scheduled post because that is mad jumpscare.

If I disappear for whatever reason, I'm not getting better. I'm not taking a break. I'm just, disappearing, dying, self-isolating, whatever, and it's my own selfish reasons. This place is my home and I would never want to leave it but it was bound to happen :/

I'm tired of being in this in-between of barely letting myself have an outlet. Either I commit to it or don't. So I think it's better that I suffer in complete silence like I always have, with no one listening to me complain and no one to witness my death (and att3mpts) /srs because it feels like a burden. ???? I didn't expect this to be so long so I'll shut up lmao.

If I come back, please feel free to laugh at me. Ily all :) /gen

Edit: Okay I had to come back just to drop off my all time favorite Puppet song B) Believe it or not, it's not Dynamo. I fucking love Dynamo but I have deep roots in Soft Spoken. I especially like, like, the first minute and the part after the first drop. kbye

[der-schmetterling]

For the record I don't think anyone posting about their ideations etc. are annoying, quite the opposite actually /g It's just the anyone but me brain game :pensive:

[der-schmetterling]

I take back what I said about making more annoying i-want-die posts. I can't share my thoughts or ideations anymore smh. They will be kept to myself as they always are (most of the time anyway). Won't talk, mention, or hint about it for a while after the next att3mpt (manifesting this /hj)

[der-schmetterling]

"I need to write my thoughts down" but that's selfish.

"I want them to see how much they hurt me" but that's selfish.

"I don't want to talk to anyone ever again" but that's selfish.

"I want die I want ouchy I want Bad Things for myself" but that's s el f i sh.

Selfish selfish selfish selfish everything about me is selfish smh. And the best I can do it let people know I'm selfish, instead of working on it. Epic /s

[der-schmetterling]

You have no idea how much I want to just delete this account. I keep it for everything but myself. It's so much easier to just disappear and die over and over again. But now I'm just dying over and over again with others watching me.

I say all this pretending I'm selfless but I truly am selfish. Imo at least B)

[der-schmetterling]

What do you know, another obligation <3 /s

[der-schmetterling]

[der-schmetterling]

peenut butter cocklate

[der-schmetterling]

woah you're my biggest fan today !!!! 🙀 for no reason of course. we both always like each other's posts at normal rates

I was gone for five years so you know it was boiling/

[der-schmetterling]

ily

ily2!! /p

[lucid-death-deactivated20230422]

about to shower and then sleep since tomorrow is a long day

i'll be mostly inactive till late sunday. imma miss y'all :3

[der-schmetterling]

[der-schmetterling]

Guys I'm trying so hard to post like a normal little goose, just excuse that I am grasping at literally /anything/ I could get my beak on that by the end of it it's all chewed and full of unidentifiable liquid.

[der-schmetterling]

I am the most worst, most lackluster creature to play Cards Against Humanity with.

[der-schmetterling]

But yeah poll idea since I can't :pensive: If there's food you really hate that people normally like, or rice reversa, you can make that into a poll and see how how much people agree/disagree with you.

For example I fucking hate marshmallows.

[der-schmetterling]

Nevermind [tumbly] too fasy