Going nowhere

Derek |23| Single

[derekshale-tw-blog]

reborn-alpha-hale‌:

Laura is so shocked when Derek moves to push out of the booth, that she doesn’t move. She’s afraid that he’s had too much and is trying to run from her. It’s not until she hears his gentle and kind voice that she reads the air and it’s not fear she feels but excitement. A smile of her own spreads across her face and she nods, letting him grab her hand and lead her outside. She has no idea what he could possibly want to show her but for him to get this excited, it had to be something big. It was rare that she saw him this excited. Not since they were kids at least.

When he starts to strip, Laura just snorts and rolls her eyes. She knows that this isn’t what he wanted to show her but she noticed that he had definitely gotten stronger than the last time she saw him. When she left on a plan for what would be the last time. She shook her head, trying to get rid of the bad thoughts. This was a time for good and happy things. Not dwelling on the past. Though it’s not hard for her to notice the cuts and wounds on him. Ones that she would definitely ask about later. Then she watched as before her eyes, he transformed. Not just a usual transformation but a full one, like herself and her mother before. A gasp escaped her and she rushed up to him running her hands through his fur. “Derek! Oh my god! How? when? This is amazing!” She buried her face in his neck fur and laughed loudly. “I said I was proud of you and I only mean it so much more now.” She spoke softly now, into his fur, though she knew he’d hear it. “I missed you so much. I’m so glad I get to see you again.” 

If he could preen as a wolf, he would be with the way she reacted to seeing him.  He lets her run her fingers through his fur for a few minutes, knowing he had to shift back to be able to explain it to her, if he could.  But he lets himself really just enjoy this moment, this almost normal moment between them.  He does eventually shift back, pulling on his pants first before he tries to explain.

“I don’t know exactly..something happened and my wolf was weakening, I was losing my power..my eyes turned back gold and I couldn’t heal..”.  It was the scariest time of his life aside from the months after the fire.  “I basically died...then was..reborn?”  It didn’t make much sense, but he came back as a different person, that’s what he knew.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

reborn-alpha-hale‌:

Laura listened to her brother speak and she felt so much for him. It had been foolish of her to hope that he had moved on and found a happier, less dangerous life. Even if he told her it wasn’t her fault, that didn’t make her think it any less. He had been drug through so much. Things he should have had a family for. People to fall back on. But he had none of it. “No, Derek. How were you to guess that it was Uncle Peter? We thought he was still in a coma from the fire.” She shook her head, feeling the tears start to well up in her eyes but she refused to let them fall. Hearing him talk to her about finding her body just felt so weird. So foreign. It seemed that her death had started a spiral none of them could have predicted. She reached out and placed her hand against his cheek. “I think you did the right thing. Though I know it couldn’t have been easy. But… I’m sorry you ever had to do that.”

As he continued to speak, she felt a frown pull at the corner of her lips. Derek was never meant to be the Alpha, not in a bad way but she knew how much of a strain it had put on her shoulders, what a heavy weight it was to know that people were relying on you to make decisions, to comfort them, to know the right answers to the questions they asked. At least Laura had gotten that training and some of the wisdom from their mother on what to do. Derek was flying solo. It wasn’t surprising to Laura to find that he had struggled with it. “It’s okay Der. Being an Alpha isn’t just about power, though that’s what many people see it as. There’s so much more to it. It sounds like you were trying to do the right thing. Sometimes fate has other plans.” She looked down and tried to stop herself from letting her tears fall for a few moments before looking back up at her brother. “I do remember him. I’ve met him before. He always seemed… secretive. I just can’t imagine trying to control that many Alphas.” She bit her lip and shook her head. “I know you must blame yourself. But what chance did you really have? It sounds like you did the best with the hand you were dealt. In the end you didn’t let the power win out over saving your sister. That’s what matters.”

He listens and suddenly he’s hit with some form of excitement, because he realizes he has something to show her.  Without saying a word he moves to gently push her out of the booth, “go outside with me”, he says quietly when she isn’t so easy to move.  There’s this light in his eyes as he drags her out of the diner and out behind it, somewhere prying eyes won’t follow as he feels like a sixteen year old kid all over again.  He has something new to show his big sister, something that will blow her away he knows.

He starts to strip off his clothes, thankful that was something a wolf family was used to, nudity wasn’t a big deal to them.  But he had some new scars now, ones that couldn’t heal because the same day kept repeating.  He forgets though, forgets about the stab wounds, the burns, the way they carved into him out of pure entertainment.  Instead he just gets into position and lets the shift take him over, slowly morphing into a giant black wolf.  He looks up at his sister, and stands there, yes bad things had happened but she had to know about the good thing, the amazing thing.

[satans-flowers]

“I am painfully aware that I am no one’s favorite person”

— unknown (via there-will-be-violence)

[lonewolfed-deactivated20160722]

Derek Hale + dramatic entrances

[derekshale-tw-blog]

foolishtheo‌:

They crashed into the ground, and as much as Theo scratched at the dirt he couldn’t get an advantage. Derek was bigger, and stronger, and also an actual wolf. He snapped his teeth, head turning to try and bite the other, spit flying as he attempted to growl back. The sound was strangled and distorted, as if it was coming from somewhere foreign. He really didn’t know how to do this whole wolf thing. 

Derek stops growling and his head cocks to the side, as if trying to figure the animal out.  If he could roll his eyes in wolf form he would, but instead he gets off Theo and nudges at the coyote’s chest and makes a rumbling growl sound and nudges his chest again.  Trying to convey that growling comes from the chest, and he’s perfectly capable of making the sound as well.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

reborn-alpha-hale‌:

Laura sighed and hugged her brother closer to her. She was sure he was just trying to make her feel better. “Even if that’s true, it still means I failed at being the Alpha I was meant to be. I should have done something.” She rested her forehead against her shoulder and took in a deep breath. Her brother was here and she had piece of home here. It worked to calm her heart and helped her to hold back the tears she wanted to let go. “Not alone? Where was Cora? How did you two even find each other again?” Upon realizing that she had probably asked to many questions she pursed her lips together and raised her head up from his shoulder to meet his gaze.

Seeing the confusion on his face made her heart ache. He looked so broken but she could still see that spark in him. The one she always saw in him. She could tell that he had faced a lot in whatever time she had been gone. “You’re here for one. That’s the big one. I know…” Laura paused before her usual bluntness said something that wasn’t right, “Things haven’t been easy for us but especially for you. But another reason I’m proud is that you’ve grown. Even if I don’t know what you’ve been through, I can tell that. I’m your big sister after all. It might not be as much as you wanted or in the way you wanted but it’s there, and I’m proud of you. You persevered.”

He rubs a hand over his face, trying to erase the tears that had escaped.  “I didn’t see it either, I was trying to push away the pain of losing you by trying to figure out who killed you.  It took me a lot longer than it should’ve to realize it was Peter”.  How does he explain Scott and his band of misfits, as well as his horrible run as alpha.  “These..stupid kids found you..or went looking for you after I had already buried you...I was watching them because Peter bit one after he killed you”.  His eyes move away from hers, eyeing the table because admitting to what he did wasn’t easy.  “When I realized it was him, that he was the alpha because he had killed you..that he lured you here for your power...”, he shakes his head and whispers, just loud enough for her to hear, “I ripped his throat out”.

“Then I was an alpha..and it didn’t...”, he snorts looking at her quickly, “I wasn’t good at it.  I tried to find people who needed the bite, who would..see it as a gift and not a curse like he did when Peter bit him”.  Scott wasn’t given a choice, and it was something he never understood Boyd, Erica, or Isaac choosing.  “You remember Deucalion right?”  He had been an ally of their mother’s for a time, “he made a pack of alphas..they had taken Cora..two of my betas..killed one and locked Cora and the other away from the moon.  They...almost went crazy...then she was poisoned and I sacrificed my power to save her”.  He’d leave out being tricked...that he had almost indirectly caused the death of another member of his family. 

[derekshale-tw-blog]

smallxmightyhale‌:

“Why?” Cora couldn’t see her being scared of the police, it wasn’t like the Beacon Hills sheriffs office was known for its arrests. “No, it wasn’t, Mom never did anything to hurt anyone and she never raised us to either but that town didn’t deserve her.” Her mother was a nothing sort of an angel to Cora, maybe it was because she didn’t remember much about her but how much people respected her and how she was loved as an alpha. “It doesn’t matter now, we all went our own way, Peter went insane, Laura died, you became this and I became who I am. Nothing can change it now.”

“Because she pissed off more than just werewolves with what happened, that violated every hunter code”.  If she had hunted them down, it wasn’t the police she would have to worry about.  “No they didn’t”, he didn’t deserve her, he deserved to be the one in the ground, not his family.  Nothing anyone could say would ever change his mind, it’s just how it was.  “I became what?  What in the world does..this mean?”

[derekshale-tw-blog]

reborn-alpha-hale‌:

Laura can feel the bile rise up her throat but she’s able to push it back down. It was hard for her to remember what had happened. One minute she was ready to defend her home as the Alpha she was meant to be, the next minute she remembered seeing her Uncle Peter and she felt like a kid all over again. Scared and unsure. It seems that was her fatal mistake. “Oh no… oh no Derek.” She just barely caught the beginning of a sob and cut the noise short. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I let my guard down. I… I didn’t think he’d hurt me.” She bit down on her lip. It felt like the grief she was feeling might swallow her whole until she heard what he said next. “Cora?! Cora’s alive? Oh gods, I can’t believe it.” Her heartbeat started to beat even faster than it had been. “At least you had each other. Your both alive.”

She let him speak and do whatever he had to, so that he was convinced that she wasn’t a figment of his imagination. “Ten fingers is good. It means things are alright. We are alright. We will be alright.” It may seem strange to other people but she could listen to her brother ramble forever. She hadn’t heard it in so long and it gave her hope that they might be able to make it through this somehow. After he counted her fingers, she gave him the best smile she could manage as she laced her hands with his. “I’ve missed you too. So much. I promise I didn’t mean to leave you. I’m sorry. I’m proud of you.”

He jerks his head up, that wasn’t what he wanted to convey, he didn’t blame her, he never blamed her.  He just shakes his head, digging around to find the right words, “that..wasn’t him he went mad..it wasn’t your fault”.  He still couldn’t refrain from blaming Peter entirely but he hadn’t tried to rip his throat out again, so that’s progress.  He nods, “we didn’t...I was alone for almost two years before I found her.  Well not entirely alone”, he wasn’t ready to expose his failures, not yet.

He repeats counting her fingers when he’s doing talking, looking up at her as she speaks.  He cocks his head to the side, confusion written across his face, “proud of me..proud of me for what?”  He couldn’t imagine one thing she could be proud of him for except for simply being alive.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

anoblebrother‌:

Elijah gave the wolf a sympathetic shake of his head, “That’s a shame, I don’t often find myself looking to alter my mind in such a fashion but a few rare times. It often takes some time and quite a bit of strong bourbon. “Half of mine are or were, the only sibling that I find is one who causes some of the biggest forms of chaos. He was once in ashes, Finn too I suppose, Henrik of course, slashed up He was such a young boy at the time. He hums, “I would like to see my sister, Rebekah. She has her bratty moments I suppose that is Niklaus and I’s fault, we gave into her every whim. Though she is growing up a bit, a thousand years late but as they say better late rather than never.” He takes a sip from the bottle freshly opened. “But as I was say Kol, he’s a dangerous one, the slighted middle child. He vexes me but I am not Niklaus I couldn’t stand to box him in another coffin again.”

“I can’t get drunk, so at this point I haven’t found a use for alcohol”, the burn at times he liked but he never actually drank a full glass.  He just nods along as the guy starts talking about people and things Derek couldn’t help but not know.  “So..they’re all dead?  How many siblings do you have, every time you talk about them you mention someone else”.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

reborn-alpha-hale‌:

Feeling Derek pull his hand away from hers sent a pang of pain through her heart. She just wanted so much to fix whatever had broken her brother so much. But it seemed from his actions that it had something to do with her. All she could do was keep him breathing through it, whispering what probably amounted to babbling nonsense to try to calm him down. To give him something to hold onto. Something to bring him back to her. He was all Laura had left and she wasn’t going to be a let down. She was going to do everything and anything in her power to make sure for as long as she could that he didn’t have to worry.

If she could she wouldn’t mind staying in this both with him for as long as this place let her. She had her piece of home and even though he seemed different than she remembered, he was still here and physically okay. That was enough. Laura couldn’t help the gasp she let out in surprise as she felt him finally snap out of whatever was holding him and it only took a second before she wrapped her arms around him as tightly as she could. Something had happened, something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. “How? Der, I don’t even know where we are, nor do I know how. But I am here. I’m real. Seems like the first bit of good news we’ve gotten in a bit.” She ran her fingers through his hair, hoping to soothe him. “You found me?” Laura was a bit confused. “What? I don’t…” Her brain flashed her pieces of something she had been trying to forget and a small wimper left her lips before she could stop it. This wasn’t about her. This was about Derek. “You mean back home.”

He leans into her touch, his wolf had missed it’s alpha, even if she wasn’t an alpha, she would always be his.  “I found you in pieces”, is his broken reply, barely pushing everything down beneath the surface.  If he was going to break it wouldn’t be here, not in front of all these people.  For some reason his eyes widen, the comment about good news, he had to tell her, “Cora...Cora got out..she..I found her..or she found me..before..this place”.  He wouldn’t elaborate on his failed time as an alpha or how he almost got Cora killed all over again.

“I don’t..I don’t trust this is real..I’ve done this before..created a world but my fingers..I still only have ten but it doesn’t make sense..”.  He doesn’t realize he’s rambling, something he did long ago before the fire, but not since.  He grabs her hands, counting her fingers, “just ten..Laura...”.  His eyes stay locked on her face, trying to memorize every detail as if it’ll be snatched from him again.  “I’ve..I’ve missed you so much..”.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

anoblebrother‌:

“Wolves trace back further than vampires, how far I can’t say.” Elijah never went too deep into learning about them, that was more Niklaus’s pastime and now that they knew his true father it wasn’t that surprising anymore as to why he liked wolves. “Hmm that’s rather unfortunate.” He mutters as he takes the bottle back, “It helps with the eclipse.” Elijah explains before he chuckles to himself. “And with the siblings. As greatly loved as they are, having them pop up one by one is taxing, though not nearly as bad as if they were show up all at once.” Like when he removed the daggers from them all and they all pounced on Niklaus looking for revenge.

“That makes sense with what my mother had always told me”, he was young and stupid thinking he had all the time in the world to learn what his mother had to teach him.  He had so much to apologize to her for, “I can’t get drunk”, he answers with a shrug.  Talking about siblings popping up, having to deal with them, well Derek would be grateful to have his siblings pop up out of nowhere. “Most of my siblings are dead”, his voice is absent of any emotion, he’s been dealing with pushing that stuff away for years, “I had one sister pop up but the rest are in ashes..or pieces”.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

reborn-alpha-hale‌:

The person seated at the table hadn’t answered her and she sighed. In that moment, as she inhaled she caught a smell that she knew instantly. But there was no way. She would have, should have realized it sooner. It was of home and pack and it was exactly what she had been missing and looking for. She looked down at him and, yeah, that was Derek. He seemed a bit more worn down than she remembered but it was him. She wasn’t alone in this place anymore. Laura felt her heart leap up into her throat and stuck her words. But her excitement came crashing back down when her senses pushed past her mind and keyed her in on his body language. He was having a panic attack and here she was gawking at him, way to go big sister.

Laura had no idea why he was panicking but all she knew was that she wanted to comfort and ground him. She dropped her tray and seated herself into the booth with him, not even thinking about what other people were seeing. Placing a hand over top of his she gave it a light squeeze, never breaking eye contact, offering him something to ground himself with. “Shhh, it’s okay Der. I’m here. I’m right here. I’m gonna need you to take deep breaths okay? In and out. You’re here and nothings going to hurt you.” She used her other hand to rub his back lightly for a few seconds before moving it to rest against his cheek. Her worry was no longer for herself but for her brother.

He shuts his eyes, pulling his hand away from her, she was not real and he wasn’t going to let his head drag him under.  She wasn’t here, she was in pieces buried back in Beacon Hills.  But there was no memory of this, there was nothing to pull this from, so his eyes slowly open to find her staring straight at him.  It felt as if his stomach dropped to his feet when he sees her, he sees her and can feel her hand against his back.

It’s likely just a couple of minutes before he’s able to take a deep breath, but it feels like forever.  He still can’t find his words, but he moves his hand, now without claws, and grips her hand.  He searches her eyes, her face, reaching out and touching her face before pulling back.  “How”, the word didn’t even sound like him, it hurt his chest to even utter the word.  “You...I found you...”, it’s as if whatever trance he was under was broken and he surges forward, burying his face against her neck, breathing her in...God...how he had missed her.  So many missing and damaged pieces slotted back into place by simply being able to breathe her in..see her whole again, he couldn’t hold back the whine.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

smallxmightyhale‌:

Cora wanted to thank him for the promise of the recording but till she had it in hand it was rather useless to her. She only nodded with a sour looking her face and she wrapped her arms around herself putting her guard up. She scoffs, “Maybe going after a vegetable of a wolf just didn’t do it for them. Not enough fun if he can’t scream.” She remembered the screaming, she ran for the woods and hid with her hands over her ears but it couldn’t drown out that sound. “Mom protected that town and it was for nothing, I wouldn’t have wanted to stay even if you guys did find me after the fire.” She was actually glad that they were stuck in this stupid town instead of Beacon Hills, the idea of seeing the house in perfect condition was too heartbreaking.

“I think it’s more because she had to run”, if she stayed behind or went after two kids Chris likely would’ve put it together sooner.  He doesn’t dwell on what he found or heard when he and Laura ran to the house that day.  “It wasn’t for nothing..what happened..that wasn’t on mom”, no that was on him, the entire thing was his fault.  “I don’t think we would’ve stayed there..but we likely wouldn’t have gone all the way to New York though”.

[polly-maddox]

It had been a long day full of unfamiliar faces and Laura was about ready to fall into an exhausted heap. Well she would wait until she got back to her tiny apartment to do that. If she could even get any sleep. Her dreams and nightmares seemed to keep her awake and she hadn’t had proper sleep in over a week. She’d taken to running through forests and trying to gain some kind of bearing on where she was and what had happened to her. Even with her powers she found a couple of scars she didn’t remember having before. Just a few more tables and then she would be done with her shift at the diner. As she approached one of her tables, her tray wobbled slightly and she moved quickly, thanks to her werewolf speed, to correct it.

“Sorry about that!” Laura quickly apologized before continuing, “So, what can I get for you?” She hadn’t even looked at the person she was speaking to, convinced she wouldn’t know them anyway.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

He had promised Cora and Isaac he would leave the house more, that and being called a hermit over and over grated on his nerves.  He decided to eat, he hadn’t had much of an appetite but knew if he wanted to stay healthy, that’s what he needed to do.  He was looking over the menu, trying to decide what he actually wanted, if anything when he catches a weird scent.  It’s one he hasn’t smelled for so long, years, the one that had brought him the most comfort in the weeks right after the fire.  Until Cora walked back into his life, it was the last sent of family he ever had.  He doesn’t look up, he doesn’t want to spoil whatever dream he was having.  It’s not until the table makes a screeching noise does he realize his claws are out and gouging the table.  But he can’t reel them in, he can’t gain control of himself, it can’t be her.  He found..he found her in pieces...in pieces.  When he finally manages to look up through his lashes, any oxygen in his lungs seems to vanish.  He can’t look away, he can’t speak, he feels his eyes burning.  But he stayed frozen, looking into the eyes of the one person who knew him the best, the person who had held him together and he, her when everything around them had fallen apart.  He knew he was panicking, and he couldn’t stop it or even understand why. 

He was afraid if he looked away she would be gone, that the only eyes that would be staring back at him were the unseeing ones that haunted him.  Her loss hit him out of nowhere, and even though she stood there in front of him, he finally was allowed to feel the weight of her loss. 

[derekshale-tw-blog]

smallxmightyhale‌:

“I knew someone had to, they told me that it was just my way of dealing, denial that I was the last one alive.” She shrugs, maybe it was, maybe it was too hard to face being the only one left but in the end she proved to be right. Not only had one other Hale survived but three? That was huge. “They would have only tried to get us all again.” The hunters wouldn’t have just disappeared, no they would have hunted them all down if they knew any of them had lived. “Yeah well I didn’t want to take care of myself, Derek. What eleven year old does? I can’t even remember what mom’s voice sounds like. I smell her perfume anywhere and I- it doesn’t matter.” She clenches her fists, feeling her anger bubble. She was tough because she had to be, because that was how she survived in the world but she would have given anything to not have to turn out that way. “Though I guess its a great thing that I can take care of myself or I would’ve been screwed.”

“We call can take care of ourselves, we did..not that we had much of a choice, but we still went on”.  The thought of forgetting his mother’s voice, it made his chest ache, “I have her voice, on a recording, it’s a voicemail I had saved..whenever we get the hell out of here..you can have it”.  He would tell her how to talk to their mother later, he didn’t want her to risk her life trying to get back to the real world where Peter and their mother’s claws were. 

“They never came after us”, Kate wasn’t that stupid, if they had turned up dead states away, it would seem too suspicious.  Besides she did do what she wanted, she tore him apart, essentially burned the Hale family away.  Hearing Cora, having her here it just makes the guilt eat away at him more.  “If they wanted to they could’ve, but they didn’t..didn’t go after Peter..”, all of it was his fault and he couldn’t...stand for Cora to look at him the way he deserves..he hoped she never learned the truth.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

anoblebrother‌:

Elijah smiles softly, “Born into it and yet it started somewhere, its a form of magic. A curse bred down the generations, though that’s about as much as I know of it. We had a pack of wolves leaving in the next village but my father was very strict in the fact we were to stay away from them.” He swallows down another sip of his bottle and even offers the unopened bottle to the wolf out of politeness. “My father didn’t hate supernaturals, my mother after all was a powerful witch, no it was something about the wolves in general. It was when my youngest brother was murdered by the wolves on the a full moon while he and another brother were watching the shift that really lit a fire of hate in his heart.”

He takes the bottle but doesn’t open it, not yet, not that it would do anything for him to be worried about..but Derek didn’t trust people.  “I didn’t say my father hated them, he wasn’t a fan of it, it carried too much risk.  I don’t know where it started, my family was a long line of wolves, I’m not sure how far..”, all of that information burned up in the fire.  “Well at least that’s a reason”, Derek could spout out his reasons, but he wasn’t one to divulge much.  He flicks out a claw and uses it to break the seal and open the bottle, handing it back to the man, “I don’t drink”.

[derekshale-tw-blog]

anoblebrother‌:

“No, a werewolf’s curse is the pain of shifting each moon I suppose, not immorality. My mother was very clear that her goal was to keep us alive for all time.” He remarks thinking back to when her and his father came up with the idea to make their family into vampires. No matter if they wanted it or not. “I suppose she never imagined the price of that gift. The fact we’re stronger and faster than werewolves however was certainly something my father put much thought in. Not fan of wolves, my father.”

“It never hurt me”, he says, fully shifting did at times, if he went into it too fast. But it was never enough to keep him from running around in his other form, it was freeing.  “I wasn’t cursed, I wasn’t made into this..I was born”, his voice held a sliver of annoyance to it.  He could understand perhaps, not being fans of wolves, he wasn’t the biggest fan of human, particuarly Argents, but he had his reasons.  “My father wasn’t a huge fan of the supernatural, but he got over it fast, marrying an alpha werewolf and all”.