North Normal was a banquet in the Summer with AC units that stuck out the window and blew cold air under their windowsills all night and backyard BBQs that made the air smell more delectable than the people who lived there. Jamie had spent summers dining on cold prime cuts of meat and sipping stale, sun-warmed lemonade like raccoon royalty. He hadn’t thought much of it after the first few Summers he spent pilfering hot dogs and lemon tarts from picnic tables in the park. Food was food and a boy needed to eat.
That year was different, however. It was Mrs. Clussy who extended the offer for him to come to the Petersen’s clambake, her smile warm and inviting, even with the suggestion that he’d be doing more than just eating. It was sweet enough a gesture without Edwina’s shiny eyes and excitable declarations of what a great idea it’d be to have another helpful pair of hands around. Mr. Clussy had different thoughts about it but they were quickly smothered by clanging pots of seafood and trays of kebabs piled into his arms.
“Today, I’m going to teach you how to barbecue. It’s an essential skill for every man to have,” Mrs. Clussy declared with a wave of her tongs like some fairy cooking TV show host.
Jamie looked bewildered but nodded his head solemnly along as he watched through the rising curtain of smoke from the grill as she showed him how to rotate the meats in a checkerboard pattern to keep track of what he’d placed on it.
It wasn’t a difficult skill to master, but the first of its kind. Jamie couldn’t remember the last time anyone taught him how to do anything, much less a loving mother. The moment settled like sand in his belly, hot and uncomfortable. He couldn’t help but think of how undeserving he was of something so delightfully mundane. So simple and uncomplicated after the last few months they’d had.
“Now it’s your turn!” Mrs. Clussy thrust the tongs into his hands and situated him in front of the barbecue. He sneezed as smoke and spices rose up into his nostrils.
“Not into the food, Jamie!” she scolded.
“Sorry,” he said, holding his elbow over his nose as more smoke wafted up from the grill as flames from the coals licked the meat. He poked at a slab and halfheartedly turned over another before an errant flame had him yanking his hand back shutting the lid on the grill and smothering the curtain of smoke.
Jamie’s brows shot up at the face that was on the other side, mingling with a few mothers who seemed to recognize him enough to crowd him with pity. It’d been a while since he’d last seen Kaz out in the daylight. Understandable, considering he himself was rarely out in the daylight, but understandable for other reasons too.
He’d read up on a lot of things but there was no protocol on how to approach someone after something so terribly complicated and tragic. Jamie had done his best to reach out but he didn’t have the balls like Johnnie, to climb in through the window and make a place for himself where he wasn’t needed.
Ribbons of dark smoke wafted up from the grill. Jamie continued staring, waffling over whether it’d be smart to call to Kaz. Were they going back to the beginning now the case was over, or...
“Jamie, the grill!”
Jamie looked down at the closed barbecue, seams billowing smoke. He lifted the lid to an inferno, fire roaring through the iron and singing the food. Quickly, he dropped the lid back down onto the flames, doing little else to contain the fire that was desperate to spill out of it. The Clussys flocked to his sides, pulling him out of the way as Mr. Clussy took matters into his own hands. Edwina was somewhere under his chin, flapping about with concern that sounded like a dull hum in his ears.
“Kaz,” he said, finally, raising a charred tong above the chaos as if it were the most casual thing in the world. “Do you want some meat?”
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