[diaryyun]

[diaryyun]

I'm exhausted, I don't know when it all started to go wrong, but I'm just exhausted. Every connection feels like work, every time that I'm awake feels like a work.

[diaryyun]

You do not have to become extraordinary to justify your existence. The trees do not earn their place in the forest. The stars do not compete for permission to shine. They exist, and that is enough. Maybe you are allowed to exist that way too.

[diaryyun]

Source: thequotejournals

[diaryyun]

I used to think peace meant happiness. Now I think peace is smaller than that, and far more precious.

[diaryyun]

[diaryyun]

Like the ocean smoothing sharp stones without asking permission.

[diaryyun]

[diaryyun]

The human heart is complicated. It can miss someone terribly and still know they no longer belong in its life.

[diaryyun]

[diaryyun]

Depression is like ever-changing weather, some days it feels like it will never end, but on other days you feel nothing but endless happiness.

[diaryyun]

I regret everything and yet I regret nothing.

[diaryyun]

[diaryyun]

There comes a point where I realize love should never require you abandon your own soul, yourself, just to make someone stay. I think a lot of people slowly lose pieces of who they are in the name of being loved. They quiet their thoughts, let go of their dreams, ignore the heaviness in their chest, and convince themselves it is worth it as long as they are not left behind. But I keep wondering what kind of love asks someone to disappear in order to keep it. What is the point of being loved if, somewhere along the way you can no longer recognize the person you've became? Maybe that is why I am drawn to the ocean so much. It is beautiful because it is free. It moves however it wants calm one moment, destructive the next, endlessly changing without asking permission for its existence. I think people deserve to live like that too. Not trapped in survival. Not apologizing for wanting more. A life where they can breathe fully without feeling guilty for wanting more than survival.

[diaryyun]

There is something peaceful about learning to belong to yourself first.

I do not think every lonely feeling needs to be answered by another person anymore. Not every ache means I should reach for the nearest hand just because it is there. There is strength in being able to stand alone without treating solitude like something that needs to be fixed.

Maybe that is why freedom feels comforting to me now. It does not ask me to shrink myself just to feel wanted. It does not make me trade pieces of who I am for temporary affection.

I want a life that feels open. In a quiet way. A life that feels like salt air and deep water and endless skies. Untamed, but still soft.

And if love finds me, I do not want it to feel like a cage disguised as care. I want it to arrive naturally, like a shoreline meeting the ocean without trying to own it.

Because the sea was never meant to belong to anyone but itself.

[diaryyun]

[diaryyun]

I just want you to know that this is me trying.