shit my friends insist i said more than once sentence starters;
βcan you believe my sister commented on my last instagram picture thati look like satan?βΒ
βlistenβ¦ i may be tiny but my kicks are can reach very high donβt try me. β
β actually, youβve got it all wrong, darling. my middle finger salutes you. β
β i look like shit, this is exactly why no one wants to date me. β
β did you know in that in eighth grade i kicked someoneβs knee and broke it? β
β he deserved it, no one fucking compares me to a semi-trailer and gets away with that. β
β do i look like my brotherβs keeper to you? β
β the best thing that happens when couple combine their names on facebooks is that you can block them both in one press. β
β you know, itβs so weird that the saying is butterflies in your stomach, it should me just flies because usually the person you fall for is a piece of shit. β
β you know you should all just break up with your boyfriends and just date me, we could be each otherβs sisters wives. β
β yes it is morning, good however it is not. β
β why do birthdays happens only once a year? i want to get birthday gifts every week.
β iβm literally the biggest sinner in this city. β
β how does my grandma always sees me from her window, for fucks sake, thereβs a building in front of hers! β
β i just hope my grandma wonβt tell my mom she saw us kiss.. β
β if you piss me off one more time i will throw my phone at your face. β
β scaring people is kinda my thing. β
β what do you mean thanks? bow down to your fucking queen. β
β what do you mean thanks? lose your clothes. β
β why yes, throwing water balloons at our boss is a good idea. β
β well you see thereβs thing thing called google, how about you use that instead of driving me nuts. β
β oh for the love of god, all i wanted was a bit of silence and rihannaβs voice is that so fucking bad? β
β we should watch porn together, that will be fun. β
β whoβs idea was it to do this again? β
β i swear iβm a nice person once you get to know me. β
β i am not a midget! iβm 5β²0 for godness sake! β
β when will the aliens save me from his awful planet? β
β do you think anyone will notice if i burnt down the school? β
β honestly, who cares, i mean if i break my leg then i will get babied by you so just push me off the bar i beg of you. β
β i wish i was an ice cream cone. β
β you canβt handle being punk rock, you can barely handle being cheesy pop. β
β if you punch me in the face iβll give you a dollar. β
β honestly iβll give everything for the hulk to fight me. β
β i feel as if someone is baking me in an oven. β
β do you think iβll be a good wife? β
