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@differentasmonkshoodandwolfsbane
Snape ā Remorse Healing the Soul
āIsnāt there any way of putting yourself back together?ā Ron asked.
āYes,ā said Hermione with a hollow smile, ābut it would be ex- cruciatingly painful.ā
āWhy? How do you do it?ā asked Harry.
āRemorse,ā said Hermione. āYouāve got to really feel what youāve done. Thereās a footnote. Apparently the pain of it can destroy you.ā
This is about a Horcrux. And in HP, remorse is āenoughā to repair you from 1) killing somebody 2) using their deaths for a Dark Curse 3) splitting your soul and actually placing the bits in cursed objects. (Thatās why Harry asked Voldemort to try feeling remorse, even though Voldemort would have been utterly defeated from that. It was a check-mate situation: be killed by the Elder Wand since Harry and people around him were protected from Voldemort, or start feeling remorse and not being able to cast Killing Curses but actually dying in the process: after all parts of his soul were already freed to go to the Afterlife, he could only join them, not make them return.)
So remorse about having led Lily (and James) to death?
The hilltop faded, and Harry stood in Dumbledoreās office, and something was making a terrible sound, like a wounded animal.
[...] After a moment or two, Snape raised his face, and he looked like a man who had lived a hundred years of misery since leaving the wild hilltop.
[...] Snapeās breathing was shallow. [#panicattack]
[...] You remember the shape and color of Lily Evansās eyes, I am sure?ā āDONāT!ā bellowed Snape. āGone . . . dead . . .ā
āIs this remorse, Severus?ā
āI wish... I wish I were dead...ā
[...] Snape seemed to peer through a haze of pain, and Dumbledoreās words appeared to take a long time to reach him.
[...] āMy word, Severus, that I shall never reveal the best of you?ā Dumbledore sighed, looking down into Snapeās ferocious, anguished face. āIf you insist . . .ā
He definitely had a breakdown so excrutiating, remorse so strong, he was willing to destroy himselfābut he actually gave his whole life for redemption instead of ending everything right then. (Intent matters in magic)
And itās obvious he feels remorseful about killing Dumbledore: he didnāt want it, he did it out of mercy, and heās very upset after doing it, when confronting Harry; maybe Snape crying in Grimmauld Place was making the parallel about having led Lily to her death, and having killed Dumbledore, two people he feels strongly remorseful for having killed.
I guess three timeās the charm: when he has to make Harry sacrifice himself, even though that hadnāt been Snapeās goal, heās killed just after he departs the message.
But because he felt remorse, and didnāt kill himself only to act on that remorse by seeking redemption, Iām fairly sure Snapeās soul was mended after leading people to the their deaths or killing them.
Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home.
Happy September 1st!
Weāre going back home.
there are people in the fandom who can
write fanfictions
draw fanarts
create gifs
think of theories
edit stuff
and then thereās me
But thereās you, who
Read our fanfictions
Like/Reblog/Commission us for our fanarts
View our gifs
Support our theories
Are amused by our edits
You are just as important as the rest of us.
All the fandoms should see this.
There isnāt even any ārest of usā there is only āall of usā. We as a fandom wouldnāt be a fandom without any parts of us.
And the āMost Nurturing Teacher of the Yearā Award goes to-
I love this.
Some sketches of the original sad boi
Oh my š
Alternate ending:
AU Snape as a surgeon. Teal and Red colour pallet.Ā
But Iāve heard people questioning if Snape was really traumatized by SWM. At first I had no idea what they were on about. How could Snape not be traumatized? Why are you even questioning this? But I figured what they meant was: why doesnāt Snape act the way I know traumatized characters to act? Why isnāt he having flashbacks or breaking down when being exposed to his triggers?Ā
Snapeās trauma is the angry aggressive kind. Snapeās trauma can be mistaken for aĀ āgrudgeā. Because itās not what people understand trauma to be.
In HBP, Harry was trying to crucio Snape and do all this other stuff, and Snape was so unbothered by it. But the moment Snape noticed Harry was about to cast levicorpus on him, Snape completely lost his shit. Below was Snapeās response to Harry trying to cast levicorpus on him.
āNo, Potter!ā screamed Snape. There was a loud BANG and Harry was soaring backward, hitting the ground hard again, and this time his wand flew out of his hand.
This is Snapeās response to Harry trying to crucio him. Literally torture him.
But Snape parried the curse,
Like a casualĀ āwhateverā. Yeah Harry got knocked off his feet, but he didnāt go soaring backwards like he did when Snape responded to Harryās levicorpus.
During occlumency lessons Snape manhandled Harry and threw him out of the room, after seeing Harry watching James Potter humiliate him.
I shouldnāt have to add disclaimers to my post, disclaimers should be givens. But unfortunately we havenāt reached that point yet.
Disclaimer: I donāt approve of Snape hurting Harry more than what he had to (Snape still had to defend himself in HBP) and I donāt approve of Snape physically hurting Harry in Snapeās Worst Memory chapter.Ā
Iām not saying that Snapeās way of expressing his trauma is okay. He needed therapy to help him learn to deal with and express his trauma in a less problematic way. The point is that Snapeās trauma is overlooked and lessened. Snapeās PTSD is called aĀ āgrudge.āĀ
Snape had a grudge against James Potter vs Snape was still traumatized by James Potter.
Jamesā change.
I will always maintain that James changed for the better. I wonāt argue my point, because Iām not here to convince you that James changed.
There seems to be thisĀ āunspokenāĀ āimpliedā message that because James changed, the damage he did to Snape doesnāt count anymore. Okay yeah James hurt Snape, but James changed, why canāt Snape just get over it?
I have zero problem with the idea of James changing. He grew as a character, happens to be morally grey, and actually has the capacity for good? Not a problem with me. He changed? Great.
If people spoke about Jamesā change like he fits in with one of the themes in HP, that people can change for the better.
But unfortunately Jamesā change isnāt spoken about like that. Jamesā change is treated like some sort of band aid to slap on Snapeās trauma.Ā
I am okay with James changing if weāre speaking about Jamesā overall character, as well as his character development. But, if a post is specifically about Snapeās trauma, then I donāt care how much James changed, and I donāt thinkĀ ābut James changedā should be slapped on any original post talking about the very real post traumatic stress disorder that Snape has because of James and Siriusā bullying him for years.Ā
I was wondering for the longest time why some Snape fans were so salty over the idea of James changing. So the fuck what if he did change? Why is the very idea of James changing a bad thing? Why is it so hurtful? My response to Jamesā changing wasĀ āmeh cool.ā Like Iām not jumping up and down in joy over it, but I donāt find the idea of James changing personally offensive.Ā
But now I get why even the POSSIBILITY of James having changed is personally offensive for people. When we hear the statement James changed, itās hardly ever on an original post. Itās nearly always some Snape anti James stan coming onto a post (that is appropriately tagged) talking about Snapeās PTSD and they come onto that post and sayĀ ābut James changed.ā As in yeah but whatever about the emotional pain Snape had to suffer from years later, yeah but whatever about his triggers because James changed.
āJames changedā has become a symbol for dismissing Snapeās PTSD.
I now understand why people takeĀ āJames changedā so personally, as if someone went up to them and slapped them across the face.Ā
James may have changed, but Snape still suffers everyday of what James did to him. James has no issues, while Snape probably has a form of PTSD. How is that fair? How is that fair that the bully got out of Hogwarts with no issues, but that the bullied got out with a lot? The fact that James changed doesnāt erase what he did, doesnāt erase the trauma Snape still has. Snape still lives with the consequences of Jamesā bullying, so the fact that he changed doesnāt matter to Snape. What is done is done. The fact that he changed only mean that people would love him now, that he became a ābetterā person. But believe me, what Snape remembers is not that James changed. I agree with you post, @pro-lily-pro-snape-anti-snily !
You summarized my entire novel into one paragraph. Amazing.
Snape deals with his trauma by attempting absolute control. During SWM he loses all control: of his body, of his wand, his clothes, his temper, his mouth. What happens at this moment? He loses the most important person in his life. This is the moment that truly sets him on his dark and terrible life path.
After publicly losing control, being humiliated, and made a laughing stock, Snape must have picked himself up off the ground, gathered his clothing about him, and returned to the relative safety of Slytherin house. Once there as many bullying victims do he took stock a post-mortem if you will to see what went wrong and what he could do about it to prevent such a thing from ever happening again in the future.
Control. This becomes his solution to prevent humiliation, and his overarching goal as far as his public Persona goes.
What kind of persona does he cultivate? dark, forbidding, intimidating, acid tongued, fierce with a curse and quick reflexes, total situational awareness, hyper-vigilance, poker faced, with a perfectly modulated voice, buttoned-down and protected by his layers of clothing which also help project a large and menacing presence.
It is all a dominance display. Itās constant psychological warfare against those who would attempt to harm him. His life experience has trained him to act as if there are mountain lions about to pounce on him at any time; most likely when he gets comfortable, lets down his guard, or gets distracted. All wilderness enthusiasts know that when faced with a large animal you try to make yourself look big by holding up your coat or your backpack. This is exactly what he is doing: look strong and scary and fierce and big so no one will even consider trying anything against him.
āThe best victory is when the opponent surrenders of its own accord before there are any actual hostilities⦠It is best to win without fighting.ā
Sun TzuĀ Ā The Art of War
Two more things: from Snapeās POV he ruined his life: when he lost Lily: because he lost control: because of James. James is why he alienated Lily. James ruined his life. If thatās not fuel for hate I donāt know what is.
After experiencing such a huge trauma many people become developmentally frozen emotionally. Their growth is stunted and they are unable to move forward or mature normally. This is not all on the Marauders. I think he experienced narcissistic wounding at home, and definitely from Dumbledore.
This is a fascinating discussion and if I were to add anything, it would be the observation that Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban does quite clearly demonstrate Snapeās trauma to the reader. However, as we are witnessing it from Harryās perspective, rather than Snapeās, I believe the fact that some people overlook it is due to factors like narrative bias (i.e. weāre shown all the signs but weāre not explicitly told,Ā via Snapeās own perspective, that heās being triggered and/or having flashbacks) and the rather poignant issue that identifying the signs of trauma in someone is not as black-and-white or easy as reading books from the characterās perspective may make it seem.
First, itās highly significant that Rowling has Harry observe this exchange between Snape and Lupin:
āAh, Severus,ā said Lupin, smiling. āThanks very much. Could you leave it here on the desk for me?ā
Snape set down the smoking goblet, his eyes wandering between Harry and Lupin.
āI was just showing Harry my grindylow,ā said Lupin pleasantly, pointing at the tank.
āFascinating,ā said Snape, without looking at it. āYou should drink that directly, Lupin.ā
āYes, Yes, I will,ā said Lupin.
āI made an entire cauldronful,ā Snape continued. āIf you need more.
āI should probably take some again tomorrow. Thanks very much, Severus.ā
āNot at all,ā said Snape, but there was a look in his eye Harry didnāt like. He backed out of the room, unsmiling and watchful.
In this exchange, Rowling is not only presenting the reader with a red herring in having Harry assume the worst of Snapeās intentions, she is also presenting them with a few clues that foreshadow not just the revelations at the end of HP: PoF but also later revelations Harry will have about Snape and his history with his father and his friends. Notably, the obvious clue in this scene is that Snape has between brewing Lupinās Wolfsbane Potion. Secondly, from the way Snapeās āā¦eyes wandered between Harry and Lupin,ā we can conclude that his suspicion that Lupin may be in league with Sirius and that he will attempt to lure Harry to him have been strengthened by discovering that Harry is now visiting with Lupin in his classroom after hours and having private conversations over tea. Indeed, itās no coincidence that Siriusās attack on the Fat Lady during the Halloween feast immediately follows this scene in Lupinās classroom between Harry, Lupin, and Snape, as the reader learns for the first time that Snapeās reasons for being against Lupinās appointment to the DADA position may be more complicated than him simply coveting the position for himself:
āYou remember the conversation we had, Headmaster, just before ā ah ā the start of term?ā said Snape, who was barely opening his lips, as though trying to block Percy out of the conversation.
āI do, Severus,ā said Dumbledore, and there was something like warning in his voice.
āIt seems ā almost impossible ā that Black could have entered the school without inside help. I did express my concerns whet, you appointed āā
āI do not believe a single person inside this castle would have helped Black enter it,ā said Dumbledore, and his tone made it so clear that the subject was closed that Snape didnāt reply.
āI must go down to the dementors,ā said Dumbledore. I said I would inform them when our search was complete.ā
However, the scene in Lupinās classroom also reveals to us one final piece of information; that is, Snapeās anxiety being in Lupinās presence, especially when so close to the full moon (Harry also remarks on Snape sitting as far from Lupin as he can, while watching him with aĀ āshifty eyeā later in the Great Hall during the Halloween feast). Itās notable that when Snape enters the room, after taking stock of Lupin and Harry together, his focus is entirely on Lupin and ensuring that he will take his potion. He does not let his eyes wander from Lupin to the grindylow tank and he not only insists that Lupin ādrink [his potion] directly,ā but appears to almost nervously linger to inform Lupin that he took the extra precaution of making āā¦an entire cauldron fullā in case Lupin āneeds it.āĀ Of course, Lupinās own coping mechanism is also on display in this exchange, as he pointedly adopts a tone of disinterested pleasantry in the face of Snapeās nervous anxiety towards him. Lastly, we are told that Harry watches Snape āā¦back out of the room, unsmiling and watchfulā (emphasis mine). This is our biggest clue that Harryās narrative is misleading and, just as Snape is often incorrect when it comes to how he reads Harryās intentions, so too is Harry mistaking Snapeās behavior as suspicious when, in fact, it is evidence of Snapeās trauma and his existing anxiety. This is a man who goes before Voldemort, widely recognized as one of the most gifted Legilimens, and lies to his face yet he refuses to turn his back on Remus Lupin when leaving his classroom. Thus, Rowling is presenting the reader with evidence of Snapeās trauma and leaving them to challenge Harryās perspective in order to recognize the signs.Ā
Ultimately, this scene also adds to the significance of Snape following the Trio into the Shrieking Shack in pursuit of Lupin and Sirius (something which I analyze at length, here andĀ here). Snape is returning to one of the key sources of his trauma, fully aware that Sirius Black āwho once attempted to murder or maim him using his friend and considered that a prankā will be waiting in the Shrieking Shack alongside Remus Lupin, who has not taken his potion (something Snape knows for a fact because he was delivering it to him when he saw the Marauders Map open in his empty office and learned where they were). The intriguing thing is that Snape maintains his composure so long as he feels that he has control of the situation (he very cleverly restrains Lupin first, using the advantage of surprise, as he knows he could transform soon and only then does he turn his attention to Sirius, who is wandless and thus less of an immediate threat). So, I would agree withĀ @ch4n71c0Ā in their assessment of Snape being someone who copes by needing control. Itās when Harry, Hermione, and Ron begin to challenge Snape, who firmly believes heās needed there to protect them from Sirius and Remus, that we see the cracks begin to form and the signs of his trauma surface:
Hermione. Ron looked just as confused as he did, still fighting to keep hold on the struggling Scabbers. Hermione, however, took an uncertain step toward Snape and said, in a very breathless voice, āProfessor Snape ā it it wouldnāt hurt to hear what theyāve got to say, w ā would it?āĀ
āMiss Granger, you are already facing suspension from this school,ā Snape spat. āYou, Potter, and Weasley are out-of-bounds, in the company of a convicted murderer and a werewolf. For once in your life, hold your tongue.āĀ
āBut if ā if there was a mistake ā"Ā
"KEEP QUIET, YOU STUPID GIRL!ā Snape shouted, looking suddenly quite deranged. āDONāT TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU DONāT UNDERSTAND!ā A few sparks shot out of the end of his wand, which was still pointed at Blackās face. Hermione fell silent.
Interestingly, Snape is not the first to criticize Hermione as Lupin had also reverted to his more passive-aggressive coping mechanisms after Hermione exposes him as a werewolf and arrives at the same conclusions that Snape had prior to Snapeās arrival ( There was a ringing silence. Everyoneās eyes were now on Lupin, who looked remarkably calm, though rather pale.Ā āNot at all up to your usual standard, Hermione,ā he said. āOnly one out of three, Iām afraid...). That being said, this is the first occasion where Snape can be seen breaking character and raising his voice and Harry even describes his expression asĀ āā¦looking suddenly quite derangedā after Hermione attempts to suggest to Snape that he could be āmistakenā about Sirius. Something which she, as Snape tells her, she does not āunderstandā as being capable of having a triggering effect on Snape (as anyone with experience being gas-lit about their abusers or bullies might more easily be able to empathize with) for the complicated psychological associations her well-intentioned appeals on Siriusās behalf may carry with them.
Indeed, Hermione, who is usually the most respectful and sensitive towards Snape, does not properly understand Snapeās trauma, as someone who was able to find friendship after being the recipient of Ronās mockery in her first-year. She, like Harry (and, subsequently, like some readers) fails to empathize with Snapeās experiences because his trauma manifests in a way that they find shocking, disturbing, ugly, and, given the situation, inconvenient. Notably, when later explaining Siriusās innocence to Dumbledore, Hermione has this to say, "He hates Sirius,ā Hermione said desperately. āAll because of some stupid trick Sirius played on him āā Despite knowing the gravity of the situation, and having scolded Lupin earlier in the Shrieking Shack for taking the risk he did with his friends while a student at Hogwarts, her frustration with Snape and her perspective on the situation leads even her to side with Siriusās and Lupinās narrative and their minimization of theĀ āprankā as something insignificant or childish Snape should be expected to have already overcome in his life.Ā
In many ways, I would argue that Rowling (someone who has very real and personal experience with mental illness) is presenting the reader with a challenge and a teaching lesson. They can side with the narrator, as Hermione has done in this instance, or they can read beyond it and acknowledge that Snapeās reactions are remarkably outside of his usual character and that the reason for that may be more than a mere inability toĀ āget overā a school-boy grudge and āā¦some stupid trick.ā That the cracks in Snapeās calm and commanding persona begin to show immediately after Hermione proposes that he could beĀ āmistakenā about Sirius is telling.Ā Snape cannot begin to consider the possibility that Sirius is innocent because he was not innocent when they were students and he was able to bully him, attempt to murder him, and repeatedly escape from any consequences for his actions. The crimes that Sirius was accused of (i.e. betraying the Potters, spying for Voldemort, and murdering twelve people) are blurring with the ācrimesā that Snape was a personal victim of and, I would argue, this complicates Snapeās ability to rationalize. In his mind, he stands before the person who not only succeeded in humiliating and harming him for years but the person who, despite his best efforts to warn Lily, also succeeded in betraying the Potters and getting her killed. All this, only for him to have managed to escape from Azkaban and attempt to go after the boy he swore to protect in penance for his own culpability in her death. Snape cannot allow this; in his mind, he is the one who is vindicated in his suspicions of Lupin and in his certainty of Siriusās guilt and he just cannot allow Sirius to charm his way out of any consequences for what he has done again.Ā
In fact, I believe that this reading is strongly supported by the fact that we see the second crack in Snapeās mask of control when Harry steps up and more ardently challenges his position. Observably, Harry also can be said to have minimized Snapeās trauma and accuses him of beingĀ āpatheticā for being unable to move beyond it, and it is only when Harry raises his voice and makes this accusation that Snape again breaks from character and loses control:
Before he knew what he was doing, Harry had crossed the room in three strides and blocked the door.Ā
āGet out of the way, Potter, youāre in enough trouble already,ā snarled Snape. āIf I hadnāt been here to save your skin ā"Ā
"Professor Lupin could have killed me about a hundred times this year,ā Harry said. āIāve been alone with him loads of times, having defense lessons against the dementors. If he was helping Black, why didnāt he just finish me off then?"Ā
"Donāt ask me to fathom the way a werewolfās mind works,ā hissed Snape. āGet out of the way, Potter."Ā
"YOURE PATHETIC!ā Harry yelled. āJUST BECAUSE THEY MADE A FOOL OF YOU AT SCHOOL YOU WONāT EVEN LISTEN ā"Ā
"SILENCE! I WILL NOT BE SPOKEN TO LIKE THAT!ā Snape shrieked, looking madder than ever. āLike father, like son, Potter! I have just saved your neck; you should be thanking me on bended knee! You would have been well served if heād killed you! Youād have died like your father, too arrogant to believe you might be mistaken in Black ā now get out of the way, or I will make you. GET OUT OF THE WAY, POTTER!ā
The very fact that Rowling describes Snape asĀ āshriekingā and āā¦looking madder than everā is a testament to his emotional and psychological distress at this point. Harry has not only become a physical barrier between him and the only doorway out of the Shrieking Shack but he has also become yet another psychological challenge and trigger for Snape. Symbolically, Harry has once more become an associative proxy for James in Snapeās mind and we see his distress come to a boiling point whenĀ āthe son of James and Lilyā appears to be repaying his efforts to protect him and his friends with ingratitude and unexpected resistance. Harry, like James, also seems intent on placing his trust in Sirius. Although he does not say, one could also speculate on whether being confronted with the boy whoĀ āhas his motherās eyesā in the Shrieking Shack and having him repeat history by also defending the people who, in his mind, contributed to Lilyās death may not be additionally triggering. Regardless, we are given some suggestion to Snapeās bitterness at James for placing his faith in Sirius and we could argue that if Snape is not yet experiencing a complete flashback, he is on the verge of it. Indeed, I would go on to suggest that Harry, Hermione, and Ronās ability to catch Snape off guard with an Expelliarmus is largely due to the fact that Snape is not himself and his emotional and psychological turmoil have left him vulnerable.Ā
Finally, we have the scenes that transpire in the infirmary as further evidence of Snapeās trauma and the strongest example of Snape experiencing a proper flashback. First, however, we are shown Snape once again more composed as he speaks with the Minister of Magic. We also later learn when Harry and Hermione make use of the time-turner that it was Snape who took command of the situation following the chaos that ensued once Lupin transformed and bothered to conjure stretchers for them all (Sirius included). He not only brings everyone back to Hogwarts but also concocts an explanation (i.e. they were Confunded) that has the double-effect of shielding Harry, Hermione, and Ron from any consequence for their involvement and also guaranteeing that their word could not have any hope of persuading the Minister to reconsider Siriusās guilt. Once again, he remains unfazed by Harry or Hermioneās insistence (even when Harry raises his voice again) that Sirius is innocent, largely due to this fact:
āMinister, listen!ā Harry said. āSirius Blackās innocent! Peter Pettigrew faked his own death! We saw him tonight! You canāt let the dementors do that thing to Sirius, heās ā"Ā
But Fudge was shaking his head with a small smile on his face.Ā
"Harry, Harry, youāre very confused, youāve been through a dreadful ordeal, lie back down, now, weāve got everything under controlā¦."Ā
"YOU HAVENāT!ā Harry yelled. āYOUVE GOT THE WRONG MAN!"Ā
"Minister, listen, please,ā Hermione said; she had hurried to Harryās side and was gazing imploringly into Fudgeās face. āI saw him too. It was Ronās rat, heās an Animagus, Pettigrew, I mean, and ā"Ā
"You see, Minister?ā said Snape. āConfunded, both of them⦠Blackās done a very good job on themā¦."Ā
"WEāRE NOT CONFUNDED!ā Harry roared.
However, upon Dumbledore requesting a word with the Trio, Snapeās anxiety and insecurity quickly rise to the surface again and we are given a third crack in Snapeās carefully controlled persona:
āMy apologies, Poppy, but I need a word with Mr. Potter and Miss Granger,ā said Dumbledore calmly. āI have just been talking to Sirius Black ā"Ā
"I suppose heās told you the same fairy tale heās planted in Potterās mind?ā spat Snape. āSomething about a rat, and Pettigrew being alive ā"Ā
"That, indeed, is Blackās story,ā said Dumbledore, surveying Snape closely through his half-moon spectacles.Ā
āAnd does my evidence count for nothing?ā snarled Snape. āPeter Pettigrew was not in the Shrieking Shack, nor did I see any sign of him on the grounds."Ā
"That was because you were knocked out, Professor!ā said Hermione earnestly. āYou didnāt arrive in time to hearā
"Miss Granger, HOLD YOUR TONGUE!"Ā
"Now, Snape,ā said Fudge, startled, āthe young lady is disturbed in her mind, we must make allowances ā"Ā
"I would like to speak to Harry and Hermione alone,ā said Dumbledore abruptly. āCornelius, Severus, Poppy ā please leave us.ā
Rowling tells us that Snapeās sudden lapse in controlĀ āstartlesā the Minister. Further, we see that Snape has become concerned that Dumbledore may have spoken with Sirius and accepted his story as true. He attempts to speak to Dumbledore first in a manner that seems dismissive, referring to Siriusās story as aĀ āfairytaleā and then his composure cracks enough to expose his insecurity, frustration, and uncertainty when he appeals to Dumbledore outright:Ā āAnd does my evidence count for nothing?ā Once more, it seems to him, history is at risk of repeating and when confronted with the uncertainty of Dumbledore, he feels more of his potential powerlessness to prevent it. Thus, when Hermione interjects, he is quick to lash out at her, just as he did in the Shrieking Shack, because she is again attempting to broach the unthinkable possibility that Sirius Black could be an innocent man.Ā
At this point, I would argue that Snape may have so thoroughly conflated the past with the present that the very idea of Sirius being found innocent of the crime that sent him to Azkaban would alsoĀ beĀ like him going unpunished for his crime of attempted murder again him, again.Ā Thus, for Snape, the past is the present and both are so tangled in his mind that Sirius cannot be guilty of one crime and innocent of another because Sirius was never made to face any consequence for theĀ āattempted murderā that he was guilty of. Ergo, Snape becomes incapable of making distinguishments because his trauma remains very raw, very present, and he was never given the opportunity for catharsis or healing; rather, he was forced into silence and he had to repress it. In fact, Rowling suggests as much and hints at the lasting effects of this response to his trauma when we see Snapeās hesitation in leaving Dumbledore alone with the Trio in the infirmary:
He crossed to the door and held it open for Snape, but Snape hadnāt moved.Ā
āYou surely donāt believe a word of Blackās story?ā Snape whispered, his eyes fixed on Dumbledoreās face.Ā
āI wish to speak to Harry and Hermione alone,ā Dumbledore repeated.Ā
Snape took a step toward Dumbledore.Ā
āSirius Black showed he was capable of murder at the age of sixteen,ā he breathed. āYou havenāt forgotten that, Headmaster? You havenāt forgotten that he once tried to kill me?"Ā
"My memory is as good as it ever was, Severus,ā said Dumbledore quietly.Ā
Snape turned on his heel and marched through the door Fudge was still holding.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban is the book that, arguably, shows us Snape at his most rebellious. The usual dynamic between Snape and Dumbledore is strained by the presence of Lupin at the school and it becomes further imbalanced at this point when weāre shown the way that old wounds cannot always be expected to properly heal. Indeed, in cases where the trauma is suppressed or silenced, traumatic wounds can remain open; as raw and ugly/messy as when they were first received (as raw as Snapeās anger and anguish throughout the climax and resolution of Rowlingās third book is). In Snapeās case, his trauma has not just left him with scars that have begun to heal over but with open wounds that he has not been able to close. This may be largely due to the way that Dumbledore handled Sirius after his failed āprank,ā as Rowling intimates when she has Snape desperately press Dumbledore on the issue. Snape has notĀ āforgottenā the way that Sirius Black tried to kill him āindeed, Rowling has made it clear at this point that he cannot forgetā and he needs to know that Dumbledore has not āforgottenā (reiterating the word twice) what Sirius did to him.
Implicit in this exchange is the potential for further evidence of Snapeās trauma as it relates to Dumbledore, in that the reader might also infer that Snape has also not āforgottenā the way that Dumbledore handled another case where Sirius was involved and, as a result, he cannot feel secure or trust that Dumbledore will not seemingly side with Sirius (and in-so-doing, choose Sirius over him) again. Thus, the issue opens itself up to further complexity, as Snapeās trauma is not just about Sirius Black being held accountable but also about Dumbledoreās inability to hold Sirius accountable the first time and how far he has truly come in terms of his relationship to Dumbledore (i.e. any hope he might have in finding trust and loyalty with him). Dumbledore protecting Sirius, despite the readerās awareness of his innocence, becomes for Snape a case of Dumbledore choosing Sirius over him again and once more failing to acknowledge the reality of his trauma. To bring this home, weāre again shown by Rowling that Snape does have very real insecurities and anxiety about what Dumbledore might do when Harry and Hermione are attempting to return to the infirmary after rescuing Buckbeak and Sirius and overhear this snippet of conversation:
They flattened themselves against the wall and listened. It sounded like Fudge and Snape. They were walking quickly along the corridor at the foot of the staircase.Ā
ā⦠only hope Dumbledoreās not going to make difficulties,ā Snape was saying. āThe Kiss will be performed immediately?ā
Clearly still unsettled, Snape is looking for reassurance from the Minister that there can be no escape for Sirius Black (and that the consequences for his actions will be swift and immediate), even should Dumbledore attempt to come to his defense again. Unfortunately for Snape, his anxieties are realized and what follows presents us with our most compelling evidence about the unquestionable validity of Snapeās trauma. First, Rowling describes for us the extreme reaction that Snape has when he learns that Sirius Black has escaped:
He and Hermione were waiting, listening, their nerves jangling⦠And then, as they both took a fourth piece of chocolate from Madam Pomfrey, they heard a distant roar of fury echoing from somewhere above themā¦Ā
What was that?ā said Madam Pomfrey in alarm.Ā
Now they could hear angry voices, growing louder and louder. Madam Pomfrey was staring at the door.Ā
"Really ā theyāll wake everybody up! What do they think theyāre doing?"Ā
Harry was trying to hear what the voices were saying. They were drawing nearer āĀ
"He must have Disapparated, Severus. We should have left somebody in the room with him. When this gets out -Ā
Snapeās rage at his fears coming to fruition is so visceral and so absolute that Harry, Hermione, and Poppy are able to hear SnapeāsĀ āā¦roar of furyā through the stone floors above them. As weāre told that Sirius Black was being held in Flitwickās office, we might assume that this is where Snape was and, upon seeing the empty office with the Minister, that this is where he most likely gave his cry of fury from. The reader is given by way of explanation that Snapeās fury comes from theĀ āsevere disappointmentā that he feels in losing a potential Order of Merlin. However, I would argue that Rowling has again presented the reader with the opportunity to challenge her narrative and acknowledge that Snapeās reaction may point to a deeper source, beyond just the loss of his Order of Merlin (although there is symbolism in Snape losing the opportunity to have a tangible and public recognition for bringing Sirius Black to justice). Indeed, the very fact that Snapeās immediate conclusion is thatĀ āPotterā āwhose identity we see begin to more clearly blur with James Potter in Snapeās mind as the loss of ājusticeā begins to cause him to flashback āand Hermione are behind Sirius Blackās escape is quite telling:
"HE DIDNāT DISAPPARATE!ā Snape roared, now very close at hand. āYOU CANāT APPARATE OR DISAPPARATE INSIDE THIS CASTLE! THIS ā HAS ā SOMETHING ā TO ā DO ā WITH ā POTTER!"Ā
"Severus ā be reasonable ā Harry has been locked up ā"Ā
BAM.Ā
The door of the hospital wing burst open.Ā
Fudge, Snape, and Dumbledore came striding into the ward. Dumbledore alone looked calm. Indeed, he looked as though he was quite enjoying himself. Fudge appeared angry. But Snape was beside himself.Ā
"OUT WITH IT, POTTER!ā he bellowed. āWHAT DID YOU DO?"Ā
"Professor Snape!ā shrieked Madam Pomfrey. āControl yourself!"Ā
"See here, Snape, be reasonable,ā said Fudge. āThis doorās been locked, we just saw ā"Ā
"THEY HELPED HIM ESCAPE, I KNOW IT!ā Snape howled, pointing at Harry and Hermione. His face was twisted; spit was flying from his mouth.
Rowling distinctly paints a picture of a man who is so āā¦beside himselfā that he has gone beyond the point of reason or of being reasoned with. Yet again denied the chance for Sirius Black to be held accountable, Snape ābellowsā and āhowlsā his accusations before the Minister, Dumbledore, and Poppy with such vehemence thatĀ āspitā is described asĀ āā¦flying from his mouth.ā His anger becomes as symbolically raw and ugly as his trauma. As Minister Fudge even notes, Snape has lost complete control of himself and given free reign to trauma expressing itself for all to see. It is in this moment that weāre given our strongest sign that Snapeās trauma may be causing him to flashback to another Potter and another point in his life when Dumbledore, other people in authority, and even his closest friend sided with his bullies against him and his word:
āCalm down, man!ā Fudge barked. āYouāre talking nonsense!"Ā
"YOU DONāT KNOW POTTER!ā shrieked Snape. āHE DID IT, I KNOW HE DID IT āā
It is at this moment that we might argue that Harry Potter and James Potter begin to most distinctly merge together in Snapeās consciousness. Snapeās insistence that Minister FudgeĀ ādoes not know Potterā seems to ring more true for the father who once stopped his friend from pulling off hisĀ āprankā and was hailed as a hero for it, than it might Harry Potter the boy heās onlyĀ āknownā himself for three years. Just as Harry may have blended with James in the Shrieking Shack when he came to Siriusās defense, so too may he have become an amalgamation in Snapeās mind at that moment when it seems to him that he is reliving the traumas of his past and being denied catharsis or justice. What follows is both interesting and tragic for the fact that, in many ways, it does serve to affirm for Snape that history has repeated for him and that his own trauma will go unacknowledged and he will be expected to keep his silence again (all emphasis mine):
That will do, Severus,ā said Dumbledore quietly. āThink about what you are saying. This door has been locked since I left the ward ten minutes ago. Madam Pomfrey, have these students left their beds?āĀ
"Of course not!ā said Madam Pomfrey, bristling. āI would have heard them!ā
āWell, there you have it, Severus,ā said Dumbledore calmly. āUnless you are suggesting that Harry and Hermione are able to be in two places at once, Iām afraid I donāt see any point in troubling them further."Ā
Snape stood there, seething, staring from Fudge, who looked thoroughly shocked at his behavior, to Dumbledore, whose eyes were twinkling behind his glasses. Snape whirled about, robes swishing behind him, and stormed out of the ward.
Rowling subtly draws our attention to a few key clues, first in the deliberate wording of Dumbledore when he finally steps in to intervene and then in what he says after he has Snapeās attention. Notably, Dumbledore instructs Snape toĀ ā[t]hink about what [he is] sayingā before having Poppy confirm for him that Harry and Hermione had notĀ āā¦left their bedsā since heĀ āā¦left the ward ten minutes ago.ā Following Poppyās confirmation, Dumbledore makes the very pointed observation thatĀ ā[u]nless [Snape is] suggesting that Harry and Hermione are able to be in two places at onceā then he needs to let the matter drop. Of course, we know that McGonagall made a special request for Hermione to have a time-turner to get to her classes and we might presume that her teachers were made aware of these special circumstances as well. Ergo, Dumbledore is very carefully making Snape aware of just how Sirius managed to escape and that he was involved in it, which presents Snape with one of two choices: either he exposes the truth and Dumbledore likely loses his position at Hogwarts or he drops the matter and keeps the truth about Sirius Black silent again. As we see, Snape looks between Minister Fudge and Dumbledore āwhose eyes are ātwinklingā which is often Rowlingās way of hinting to the reader the use of Legilimancy may be taking placeā before heĀ āstormsā out of the ward.Ā
So, Snape makes his choice for the sake of the war and the necessity of Dumbledore being able to maintain his strategic position at Hogwarts and returns back to keeping his silence āboth about his trauma and the truth of Sirius Blackā knowing now there is no chance of him being vindicated or finding catharsis. He is giving up any position of control just as he symbolically lost his control a few moments before Dumbledoreās coded revelation. In fact, I would argue that his realization of what Dumbledore has orchestrated that motivates him to find a secondary-catharsis and regain some control by revealing Lupin as a werewolf. Depending on if one reads Dumbledore as having given Snape permission to expose Lupin (which a theorize on here) or that Snape acted on his own with the potential rationalization that he was looking after the best interests of his house where Dumbledore did not (which I also discuss in more detail, here), I do find it very likely that his actions were motivated by the scene in the infirmary.Ā
Additionally, whether the reader chooses to interpret what followed Snape āstormingā out of the infirmary as adding insult to injury or not is entirely up to them, however, I personally choose to interpret Dumbledoreās words to Minister Fudge as him acknowledging the complicated history and psychological underpinnings of the situation with Sirius and how his choices have impacted Snape:
āFellow seems quite unbalanced,ā said Fudge, staring after him. āIād watch out for him if I were you, Dumbledore.ā
āOh, heās not unbalanced,ā said Dumbledore quietly. āHeās just suffered a severe disappointment."Ā
TheĀ āsevere disappointmentā that Dumbledore speaks of is not just the symbolic loss of the Order of Merlin that would have meant a public acknowledgment of him bringing his bully to justice. Itās also the harsh reality of having Dumbledore side with anotherĀ āPotterā and his friend in helping his childhood bully escape from facing any consequences again, as no matter how innocent Sirus Black might have been of one crime in Snapeās mind he will always still be guilty of āattempted murder.ā Therein lay the source of Snapeās trauma; he is a victim who has never been able to have his bullies held accountable and he has been perpetually silenced and denied the catharsis of justice or recognition āwhich is why James changing is not a good argument, and will never be a good argument, as it only seeks to derail from the reality of how trauma functions for people whose wounds remain as raw, untreated, and left to fester as Rowling shows us Snapeās are in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.Ā
Severus Snape with a cold is so great and an absolute mood.
I want 12.
OK, Snape Discussion: How do YOU think Snape contacted Sirius at the end of OotP to see if he was still at Grimmauld place?
Lorrie Kim in her book āSnape: A Definitive Readingā claims that Snape used his Patronus. Her basis for this belief is Dumbledoreās line in Ootp Ch 37: āI should explain that members of the Order of the Phoenix have more reliable methods of communicating than the fire in Dolores Umbridgeās office.ā Kim refers to this line plus the fact that other Order members later in the book series are shown sending messages via Patronus.
This doesnāt feel quite right to me. Snape seems to be incredibly protective of his Patronus, as we can see in The Princeās Tale chapter of Deathly Hallows, which flashes back to events that take place during Half-Blood Prince.
Dumbledore is the only one who knows the truth about how Severus felt about Lily, yet he says, āAfter all this time?ā when Snape sets off his Patronus, which infers that itās been a long time since Dumbledore has seen Snapeās Patronus, ie Snape has not been using his Patronus to send messages to anybody.
And if he was hiding showing his Patronus from Dumbledore, the one person who already knew his secret about Lily, why would Snape send his Patronus to check on Sirius, one of the people he hates the most?
Because if Harry is full of shit about his āThey have Padfoot,ā warning and Sirius turns out to be fine, Snape knows Sirius might figure out his secret about loving Lily and mock him forever.
Plus, having anyone know his secret about Lily could SEVERELY damage Severusās ability to be a double-agent. If Voldemort captured someone who knew Snapeās allegience to Lily, and therefore his allegience to the side of good/Dumbledore, and Voldemort read it from their mind with Legilimency, Snape would be finished.
Snape has been attending both Death Eater meetings and Order meetings for all of OotP, so it is obvious that he has a quick and easy way to get out of Hogwarts when his Dark Mark burns. When Voldemort calls he wants you here NOW. Whether itās an unregistered Portkey, a private Floo connection, something to do with Fawkes, or just flying like Voldemort taught him, I am positive that Snape has a way to Get Out Quick.
I feel like itās more logical that Snape used his Get Out Quick method to PHYSICALLY check on Sirius at Grimmauld place, and then hurried back to Hogwarts, versus sending his carefully-guarded Patronus to Grimmauld place and risk a potentially not-in-danger-at-all Sirius of learning his deepest secret.
What do YOU think Snape did?
EDIT: Thought of something else to add. It could be very possible that Snape wanted to hide the fact that he could conjure a Patronus AT ALL, because only good and pure of heart people are supposed to be able to conjure one. Death Eaters cannot conjure a Patronus, and if any of them hear through the grapevine in any way that Snape CAN, his cover may be blown.
(Tagging @deathdaydungeon bc they are the Master of Meta and I would love to hear their take on this.)
in the au where harry potter was raised by sirius black he knew more swearwords than regular words until the age of five
Wanted to try line-less art as well as some more lighting practice, so I did both!
I really do like Snape's new robes and seeing them in this lighting is 10/10šø His eyes are a bit off but I still love how this came out!
snape spies by makani