Endlessly ♡ @diorkyuhae - Tumblr Blog

Six Years

Summary: Y/N forgets her life with Steve, but it's not as simple as just remembering.

Warnings: uh angst maybe?, migraines, nothing that bad I think

Word Count: 12,901

a/n: look I am and always will be a Steve girly. Chris finally winning Sexiest Man may have inspired me to finish this

Masterlist

If you had to choose one word for how you felt in this exact moment, it would be tired. Granted, that’s not an uncommon occurrence, but it just felt… more this time. Your eyelids felt like paperweights, far too heavy to even consider opening. Your entire body was fighting your consciousness, begging you for more sleep. Who were you to say no to another five minutes?

You let out a low groan, rolling over to find a more comfortable position. Your body protested the move, but if you were going to fall back to sleep you absolutely had to roll over.

"Y/N?" You were too tired to really pay attention to the voice, simply responding with your current plan of action.

"Five more minutes," you grumbled inaudibly, barely able to form the words. Your throat was too dry. It felt as though you hadn't used your voice for weeks.

"What?" The voice was closer this time. You managed to clear your throat, doing nothing to hide your annoyance at being disturbed.

"I said, five more minutes," your throat scratched as you spoke louder, only resulting in another groan from you.

Of all the things you expected in response to that statement, laughter was pretty low on the list. Maybe if they were laughing because you were supposed to be up an hour ago and you were going to be late for work, but that wasn't what you heard.

No, this laughter was shocked, maybe a bit disbelieving, but overall happy. As if the person laughing was pleased to hear your early morning grumbling. Well, at least you assumed it was morning.

You rolled toward the voice, still fighting with your eyelids to open, When you finally managed it, your eyes burned from the harsh light. It didn't even feel overly bright, but it seems you'd grown used to the dark and weren't ready to face daylight again.

"Why are you laughing at me?" you groaned, finally accepting the fact that you were now awake. Although, you regretted that almost instantly. Being awake enough to open your eyes meant being awake enough to feel how sore and worn out your body felt. "And what the hell did I drink last night?"

The last thing you remember, you were coming home from your last final, ready to party it up with your roommate. You don't even remember opening the drinks, let alone any partying that came after.

"I'm sorry..." You refocused on the voice, rubbing your eyes in an attempt to get used to the lights. "It's not funny. Just, only you would ask for five more minutes after waking up from a coma. Steve's gonna be so pissed he wasn't here."

A coma? Steve? Your thoughts were suddenly racing. You finally managed to open your eyes well enough to see, voice failing you as you took in your surroundings. The voice was definitely not your roommate. In fact, it was a brunette man you don't recall ever meeting before. And you were not, in fact, in your bed- or even in your apartment.

The room looked like a hospital, but fancier. Maybe a private facility? You could hear the faintest of beeps indicating your heart was in fact pumping. It wasn't as jarring as the equipment in an actual hospital. You would know. You worked in one.

"Where am I? What happened? Who..." you trailed off when you noticed the mystery man's metal arm. He seemed relieved to see you were okay, although he was ignoring you in favor of texting someone. When he finally looked up, you nearly stopped breathing. Good lord, that man is attractive.

You opened your mouth to ask more questions when the door on the other side of the room flew open. Startled by the sudden noise, you shrieked, turning with wide eyes to stare at the intruder.

It was another mystery man, blonde this time. Also wickedly attractive. What are they feeding these people? His blue eyes were filled with relief, although you had no idea why it would be over you. Yet again, the second you opened your mouth the brunette started talking.

"She just woke up punk, take a deep breath," he chuckled when the blonde glared at him.

"And I would have been here for it if you didn't make me leave, jerk," he huffed in response, only confusing you more. Why was he so pressed to be here when you woke up? You looked between them, mouth agape and eyebrows furrowed. It seemed the movement caught their attention, suddenly two pairs of blue eyes were focused on you.

"How are you feeling? Are you okay?" The blonde one took your hand, holding it with a gentleness you wouldn't expect from such a large person. Your gaze flickered between his eyes and his hand, confusion still fogging up your brain.

"What happened?" you started with the basics. "Where am I?" Something was telling you not to ask about the identity of the men with you. It felt as though they knew who you were, and you wanted answers.

"You're in the med bay. The last mission you were on, it was a setup." The brunette started to answer your questions, but he trailed off when he noticed your confusion only grew with each word he spoke.

"What mission?" you emphasized the word, thrown off by the men acting like you're some sort of spy.

"What's the last thing you remember?" The brunette asked the question. The blonde was beginning to make you nervous with his aggressive staring, even if it seemed to be coming from a good place.

"I... I just finished my last final. It was my last class before graduation, and I was planning to go out with Jess to celebrate being done with school..." The answers to your previous questions did very little to fill you in, so you asked the obvious question you'd been holding back. "Who are you?"

The two men tilted their heads, their confusion clearly evident. It would have been funny how similar they reacted if you weren't so damn confused.

It was their turn to be cut off by the arrival of somebody new. Or in this case, multiple somebodies. The med bay, as the brunette put it, was suddenly full of people, none of whom seemed familiar to you in the least. At least not on a personal level.

"Tony Stark?" you whispered, but it seemed some of them still heard you.

"You really asked for five more minutes after being in a coma for a month?" Tony Stark himself spoke as if he knew you personally, really adding to the headache you've felt growing since you woke up. Although, Tony's presence did do one good thing for you. It suddenly clicked who the two mystery men were.

Realizing you are in the presence of the Avengers, while trying to figure out what the fuck was going on, combined with hearing some sort of mission put you in a coma for a month really took a lot out of a person.

"I kind of wish I just went back to sleep," you muttered, rubbing your head with your free hand since the newly identified Steve Rogers was still holding the other one.

"The last thing you remember is finishing college?" he finally spoke up, earning confused looks from everyone but the other newly identified man, Bucky Barnes.

"Yes? I mean, I think so..." The room grew quiet after your admission, nobody knowing where to go from there. "How long ago was that?"

Suddenly, the pattern of the tiles on the floor grew more interesting than this conversation for nearly everyone in the room. The only one who maintained eye contact was Steve. You could see the hurt in his eyes when he finally admitted just how much of your life you'd forgotten.

"Six years ago," he whispered, just loud enough for you to hear. You squeezed his hand when the new information registered, needing something to anchor you or else you may just pass out again.

"Si-six years? It's been six years? What the fuck happened to me?" Your breathing sped up as you began to panic, the feeling of the medical equipment stuck to you was too much. Everything was too much. Nothing made sense. "No. No that can't be right. No, because I just finished school..."

The room started spinning. Everyone was staring at you, their mouths moving but you couldn't hear any words. Your eyes flickered from one face to another, the panic growing with each second you couldn't make out what they were saying, and then everything went black.

-

You groaned as you woke up, body still aching. For a few blissful seconds, you forgot about the team of heroes who informed you six years of your life had passed. The ignorance didn't last long, resulting in your eyes flying open and your body sitting up.

The first person you saw was none other than your college roommate and best friend, Jess. After scanning the room, you realized it was just the two of you. She was looking at you with clear worry.

"Jess, thank God. I had the weirdest dream..." You shook your head, still trying to make sense of the brief period of time you thought you were in a coma. "I was in a coma and the Avengers were there... What the hell did I drink last night?" you chuckled, smile slowly falling when Jess didn't respond.

When she ran a hand through her hair and sighed, you knew it wasn't a dream. It was her tell. She did it every time she had bad news, like the time she bailed on you to go on a date, and the time you forced her to check your grade on a really hard exam because you were too scared to look.

"I was in a coma?" You took a few deep breaths, trying to make sense of what in the hell was going on. "It's actually been six years?"

"It has," she nodded. "They called me when you woke up, but I didn't get here fast enough." She pulled a chair next to your bed, finally coming close enough for you to see a bandage on her hand.

"What did you do this time?" you joked, finding comfort in her still being as clumsy as you remember. The tears in her eyes were unexpected.

"I cut it when they told me you were awake." She let out a soft chuckle, wiping the few stray tears. "I was so surprised, I stopped paying attention to what I was doing. Pretty ironic you couldn't heal it for me." Her eyes went wide when she realized what she said.

"Heal it?" you asked, confusion still plaguing your thoughts. Suddenly, memories of an explosion flashed through your mind, accompanied by searing pain in your head. "What the fuck!" you practically screamed, your frustration boiling over. You forced your eyes open, trying to stop the pain.

Looking back to Jess, you figured your best chance was to ask what happened. "Was there an explosion at some point?" She glanced at the door, unsure if she she actually tell you anything. "Please, Jess, I need something." You grabbed her hand, gasping when it glowed.

"Okay! Okay, but you need to breath, okay? You can't pass out on me again." You watched as she unwrapped her hand, showing completely healed skin. "After graduation, we both got jobs in research at Oscorp..."

"I can't believe we actually work here." It must have been the seventieth time you've said those words to Jess on your lunch break.

"I know! It's so surreal to be part of... all this." She gestured around the building, her giddy smile matching your own. The two of you started working at Oscorp 3 months ago, her in electrical engineering and you in biomedical.

"I'll see you after work?" You began cleaning up your garbage, preparing to go back to work.

"Actually, I have plans. Liz and I are celebrating our one year," she smiled, a wistful look in her eye.

"How could I forget? I'm so happy for you guys," you smiled cheekily in return. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow then... or Monday?" You ran before she could throw something at you. "Bye!"

Shaking your head, you made the trek back up to the biomedical floor. You were in the process of isolating stem cells for regenerative medicine. Ideally, in a few months your 3D printed skin prototype would be ready for trials.

You still marvelled at the equipment as you made it back to your lab bench. Neither college nor your part time position in a hospital really did anything to prepare you for the private sector. It was so much more advanced. You still sometimes felt a bit of imposter syndrome. Shaking off the unpleasant thoughts, you got to work.

Without realizing, you worked later than intended. Typically your friday ends at 4:30, but it was already 7:15. No wonder you were so hungry. Just before you could pack anything up, you felt the building shake. A bright light followed, the force of the blast knocking you and your bench over.

"I really pass out a lot, don't I?" you griped, annoyed with the circumstances of your memory loss. "Is that what happened, I hit my head and forgot six years of my life?"

"Do you want me to finish the story, or not?" Jess rolled her eyes, but she smiled. It felt good to have you back to your sarcastic self. When you nodded, she continued. "I heard about the explosion, and panicked when you didn't answer any of my calls. Liz obviously understood, and we rushed to the hospital where they were sending the survivors..."

The ER was a wreck. Thankfully the majority of the employees had left before the explosion, given that it was a friday. The havoc came from family and friends who couldn't contact their loved ones due to the cell reception issues.

Jess finally made it up to the nurse's station, Liz hot on her heels. "Hi I'm looking for Y/N L/N. Is she here?" She followed up the question with a general description of your appearance.

The nurse looked through their stacks of papers, finding a chart with the right name. "You can follow me." They threw procedure out the window, aiming to just rid the room of people as quickly as possible.

When Jess and Liz rounded the corner toward your room, they could hear you arguing with someone.

"I'm fine! I feel fine, I promise," you paused, waiting for someone's response. "They're keeping me for an hour or so for observation just in case. I promise I'll call you when I'm free to leave." You looked up when the new bodies entered the room. "Jess is here. She'll drive me home, don't worry. It's not worth sitting in the traffic because I'm completely fine. I promise." You shook your head, finally saying "I love you too, bye."

"Your mom?" Jess guessed, smirking when you nodded. Seeing as the two guests did in fact know you, the nurse left, wasting no time in getting back to the ER.

"You know how she worries. Granted, this time feels kind of warranted." You were still trying to wrap your head around everything. "It's crazy I'm not injured. Sorry about your date. You too Liz. I would've called, but as soon as reception came back my mom was calling."

"Don't worry about it!" Liz answered when Jess only surveyed you, eyes roaming your body.

"How are you so okay? The news is saying it was the particle accelerator that exploded. That's that floor below you." Jess inquired.

"I have no idea. Last thing I remember, I was being thrown across the room with my research, then I woke up here and felt fine," you shrugged.

"You don't even have any scrapes or bruises. How is that possible?" Jess shook her head, more so voicing the questions out of disbelief than actually expecting answers. Eventually, the three of you moved on to talking about anything you could to pass the time.

A half hour later, you were being discharged to make room for more emergent cases. They removed your IV, had you sign some papers, and you were in the car on the way to the closest fast food place.

You brought the food back to your apartment, trying to convince Jess and Liz to salvage what was left of the night for their date.

"Seriously, I'm fine. I don't need you to babysit me-" Suddenly, Jess cut you off.

"Y/N! You're arm!" she pointed excitedly, eyes wide. You glanced at your arm, turning it around.

"It seems fine." You looked back at her as if she had lost her mind.

"Yeah, but it shouldn't be! You should have a bruise or at least a mark from the IV," she shot back, watching the moment it hit you.

"What the hell?" you whispered, refocusing on your arm to try and come up with some explanation. Suddenly, you were grabbing the nearest piece of paper, intent on giving yourself a paper cut. You winced when it stung, but watched in amazement as your skin healed itself, a faint glow emanating from the wound. "What the hell?" you repeated.

"And that's it." Jess finished the story, shrugging when you gestured for more.

"What do you mean that's it! That can't be it! How did I figure out I could heal other people? Are there other people with... powers? What's the most dangerous thing I've healed? Will it last forever?" You rambled with every question you could think of, staring in amazement at your own hands. You could still feel the splitting pain that reliving your past seemed to cause, but you ignored the feeling in favor of figuring out as much as possible.

"Well, after the accident we obviously stopped working at Oscorp since the building was practically obliterated. We did what we could, but we didn't really have the tools to test your newfound powers," she smirked. "You moved in here a few years months later."

You bit your lip, eyeing her with a curious gaze. "We still hang out though, right?" you nervously voiced your question, scared to hear that you haven't seen her in years.

"Oh, yeah! All the time. We actually just had lunch before your last mission." She smiled fondly at the memory, but it faded when she remembered the result of the mission. "We didn't know if you were going to wake up," she choked back a sob. "Ever since the explosion, you've never been down for long. A few minutes at most from what I know. Nothing's ever hurt you like this before..."

"That's why we think it was a purposeful attack, designed to knock you out." Suddenly, the two of you weren't alone. Tony Stark waltzed into the med bay, a young man right behind him.

"That's my queue. I'll see you later, okay?" Jess hugged you before she left, leaving you with more questions than she had answered. Your eyes remained on Jess until she turned a corner out of your view, forcing you to look to the two newcomers.

"Is this the part where you tell me how I ended up here?" You questioned, looking between Tony and the younger man you didn't recognize for answers.

"You saved my life," the younger man answered with no hesitation. Your entire body jerked toward him. If you had water, you definitely would have done a spit take.

"I what?" you sputtered, still trying to put together what you remember with the information Jess gave you.

"I'm just going to run some tests while Spidey fills you in. Pretend I'm not even here." Tony started messing with the machines you were connected to, ignoring the increased furrow of your eyebrows.

"Spidey? You're spiderman? You're practically a child!" Your mouth hung agape as you stared at the man. The last you had seen, Spiderman was responsible for capturing weapons dealers who specialized in alien tech. That's definitely not something you'd expect a child to be capable of.

"Hey, I'm twenty-two!" he practically whined, only reinforcing your image of him as a child. "Anyway, this is the story of how you saved my life." Spiderman paused, as if expecting an audience reaction.

"Kid, get on with it." Tony muttered, still focused on the various machines. In fact, now that you've actually had a chance to look around, these are definitely not standard hospital machines. Before you could ask about them, he started his story.

"Well, a little less than six years ago, I was fighting these dudes..."

Peter swung from building to building, looking for anyone or anything out of place. It was his standard patrol route, but something felt off. His spidey sense was definitely tingling.

He was being extra vigilant as he looked down each alley for anything suspicious, but it was of no use. The bad guys weren't trying to hide in an alley. No, they were right in the middle of the street, and they were looking for a fight.

One of them shot some alien tech weapon into the sky, resulting in a loud boom echoing through the block. Instantly people started running, looking for anywhere they could hide if they couldn't get away.

He swung closer to surprise them when someone shouted about his arrival. His graceful landing was rather rudely interrupted when bad guy number two shot his alien gun at Peter's webs, unceremoniously dumping him to the ground.

Despite the rough landing, he jumped right into the fight. Everytime he thought he had them cornered, they'd whip out a new weapon. By the third time, he expected the surprise and easily dodged the blast. Unfortunately, it was enough of a distraction for them to blast him with new weapon number four.

He flew backwards, crushing a dumpster from the sheer force of the blast. Before he could recover, another blast hit him, sending him clear through the brick wall into an adjacent alley. The group of attackers took this as there opportunity, escaping in the waiting getaway car before anyone was apprehended.

Peter groaned, unable to even sit up. Karen was listing his stats, but he couldn't focus on her words enough to do anything with the information. Karen must have alerted Tony to his distress because he could hear Tony's voice. Or maybe he was hallucinating.

"Oh my god, Y/N that's Spiderman!" A voice a few yards from Peter spoke up. "He looks hurt... Are you okay Mr. Man? Mr. Spider? Mr. Spiderman?"

"He's clearly not okay, Jess. Oh my god." You ran toward him, concern clear on your face. Just as you knelt down in front of him, he started talking.

"Mr. Stark? I'm fine." Peter was not fine, but his ever present fear of disappointing Tony inevitably lead to his denial.

"Kid, you're not fine. I can see your vitals." Tony deadpanned. Meanwhile, your concern was growing. From your point of view, there was nobody present for him to be talking to.

"Oh my god, Jess. He's hallucinating." You worriedly looked at your friend, concerned for the man in front of you. He didn't seem to hear your comment, but that only added to your worry. "Spiderman? Can I help you? Maybe we can take you to the hospital?"

Jess nodded in agreement, confirming that was the best plan. Peter vaguely nodded, not really hearing you. You reached for his arm, slowly pulling him up to help him stand. The second you made contact, your hands started glowing. You would've dropped him if he wasn't also holding on to you.

"What the fuck?" Jess called from behind you, watching the mysterious glowing. You nearly shrieked when another voice sounded from behind you.

"Well, that's new." Iron Man himself stood behind you, watching curiously as the glow faded.

"Uhh... yeah. It is," you confirmed, staring wide eyed yourself.

Everyone looked at each other, confusion and concern on their faces. It wasn't until a voice came from Peter's suit that anyone said anything.

"Vitals stable." Karen updated the group, although it seemed to already be known.

"How..." you mumbled, overwhelmed by your newfound ability. It had already taken so much to get used to healing yourself, but you can heal other people too?

"That's what I'd like to know." Tony chimed in, a smirk adorning his features.

"And then you came back to the tower with us!" He finished his story, unphased by the disbelief in your expression. "Dr. Banner ran some tests, and it turns out the particle accelerator altered your DNA."

You nodded silently, thinking about everything you've learned since you woke up. "This is insane." Your headache spiked again, beginning to reduce to a dull throbbing after the story, but still enough to earn a grimace. Tony seemed to notice your discomfort, marking something down with the rest of the test results.

"It seems your vitals are all stable. Nothing seems to be different than the first time we ran all of these tests. Slightly depleted levels of serotonin and estrogen, but nothing noteworthy. I'll have Bruce look it over when he gets back from Cho's lab, but everything seems fine."

"So why can't I remember?" you asked the question, not really expecting an answer, but hoping for at least a working theory. Tony sighed, glancing at the door before giving in.

"We think whatever weapon Hydra hit you with was designed specifically to take you down. They somehow targeted the regeneration of your cells, slowing it down enough to allow you to be injured. The amnesia could be a side effect of whatever process they used, or the result of hitting your head."

Science. You understood science. That was something you could work with. "But everything's back to normal? My cells are regenerating again?"

Tony nodded, showing you the results from your original tests six years ago and the ones he just finished running. "So we don't know if it's temporary..." you mumbled, thoughts running wild.

"Which means we should treat it like retrograde amnesia..." Tony supplied you with the next logical conclusion, knowing you wouldn't appreciate the treatment plan.

"Damnit," you cursed.

"What?" The young one questioned the shift in mood.

"It means no more stories, Pete." Tony sighed.

"Pete..." you repeated the name, closing your eyes in an attempt to remember something new. "Pete... Peter... Peter Parker!" Your eyes flew open. "That's your name right?"

"Um... yeah," he replied, looking at your warily.

"Okay. That's good. I remembered something."

"You mean you didn't know my name the whole time I was telling that story?" Peter guffawed. "Why didn't you say anything! I would've introduced myself.

You shrugged. "I wanted to hear the story."

Tony just shook his head. "Hey, kid. Why don't you take her on a tour? Start with her room."

"My room?" you asked, still trying to wrap your head around everything.

"Well, you don't normally live in the med bay," Tony joked. "See if walking around helps. If you need to rest, you can do it in your room instead of here."

You simply nodded, so thrown off by the information overload. Peter lead you out of the room and down the hall to the elevator. You definitely could've gone back to sleep, but your desire for answers was definitely outweighing your need to rest.

Peter dutifully showed you around the entire tower, starting with your room as Tony directed. You slowly walked around the space, looking at the various pictures and items strewn about.

"It's just like it was before the mission." Peter supplied, hoping to jog your memory. You simply nodded, still trying to digest everything that happened today. Sitting down on the bed, you reached to grab the picture frame from your nightstand.

The photo showed you and Steve Rogers at Coney Island, his arm wrapped around your waist. While you were smiling at the camera, Steve was looking at you. The expression on his face suddenly answered a few of your questions from earlier.

"That's why he cared so much..." you mumbled under your breath, barely even registering Peter's presence in the room. You glanced around again, noticing all the small things you missed before. The men's sweatshirt left at the end of the bed, the drawings that were framed on the walls with the tiniest signature of initials SGR in the corners, even the few candles on your desk that you knew you would never choose for yourself. There was clearly two people living here.

You reached for the sweatshirt, mourning the memories you knew you should have. More than anything, you felt sorry for Steve. Just thinking if the roles were reversed has you ready to cry. You held the sweatshirt to your chest, trying to keep your composure while you're with Peter. Holding the sweatshirt that close, you realized you could smell Steve's cologne on the fabric.

Suddenly, you feel as though you were thrown back in time, remembering the first time you met. "He was there the first time I healed someone after you..." You glanced at Peter, trying to gauge if you were actually remembering something. The more you thought about the memory, the more you could feel another headache coming on.

"I, um, I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about this. Mr. Stark said no more stories..."

"You don't need to tell me. I- I remember it. I mean, I think I do. Just tell me if I'm right?" When Peter nodded, you jumped into the story, paying no mind to the growing pain in your head.

You had just finished your tour of the tower- Peter giving the actual tour while Tony continued to ask you random questions about your powers- when someone ran down the hall to get Tony.

"Stark! We need Cho, it's Barnes." The mystery woman paid you no mind aside from one questioning glance, although you still felt exposed under her gaze.

"She left for South Korea a few hours ago, but I'll make the call. Banner is in the med bay now." Tony replied, already asking the built in AI to redirect the quinjet. He started to follow the woman back towards where they ran your tests, leaving you and Peter with no choice but to follow.

The room was much more chaotic than when you left. Multiple Avengers were in beds around the room with varying injuries. Sam Wilson was being checked for a concussion. Another woman you didn't recognize was having a wound stitched up in the next bed over.

The most people were huddled around a bed in the middle of the room, Steve Rogers' voice shouting over the commotion. "Tony!" He waved him over, Bruce Banner already standing at the bedside. Steve was covered in blood, although from the state of things you could surmise it wasn't his own. Bucky Barnes was laying motionless in the bed, his face growing paler with each second.

You and Peter watched with wide eyes as they discussed what happened. With what you could overhear, it seemed the mission they were on was based on outdated intel. The base was swarming with Hydra agents, leaving the team outnumbered and outgunned.

Bucky took the brunt of it, jumping in front of the gun fire to save some of the others. Although he could deflect some of the bullets with his metal arm, there were too many for him to stop them all. Not too mention, he had already been stabbed in the side before the guns were fired. The only thing keeping him alive was the super soldier serum. If not for his advanced healing, the stab wound would have resulted in blood loss had the gun shot wounds not done it first.

"He's losing too much blood," Bruce muttered, trying his best to help despite not being that kind of doctor.

"Cho left hours ago. Even with the maximum speed, she won't be here for another 30 minutes," Tony informed the group, their expressions growing more and more panicked.

"Y/N!" Peter exclaimed from next to you, startling you into looking away from the horror in front of you. It seems nobody else noticed his outburst, still focused on stopping the bleeding. "You can heal him!"

"What?" you replied in a panicked voice. "No I can't! I don't know if I can heal wounds that serious!"

"You healed me!" Peter replied, trying to encourage you. "Mr. Stark said my vitals were failing. I was probably bleeding internally and you saved my life. You can save him too!"

You shook your head, staring wide eyed at Peter. You had no idea how to control your powers, let alone if they had any limits. Before today, the most you had healed was little scrapes and cuts and they were only on yourself.

"At least try. Please?" he asked, encouraging you to help. Glancing at everyone's distraught expressions, you nodded. "You can do it! I know you can!"

Peter instantly started pulling you through the crowd, getting you right next to Bucky before anyone even noticed you moved. He nodded at you with a supportive smile, encouraging you to try.

"What are you doing?" Steve shouted, his emotions running wild. Just as he asked, your hands started to glow. "Get away from him!"

He started toward you, but Peter held him back. Tony, in turn, held back the others. They watched as a bright, warm light emitted from your hands and encased Bucky's wounds. Before their eyes, the wounds started healing. He was no longer bleeding out and the color was returning to his face. Within 30 seconds, he was completely fine.

Nobody said a word, everyone stunned by the events they witnessed, yourself included. It wasn't until Bucky sat up that anyone spoke.

"What happened?" Bucky croaked, looking around at everyone's faces. He rubbed as his side, expecting to feel sore from the wounds. Instead, he found skin that had completely healed. "How long has it been?"

"About forty minutes," the mystery woman from the hallway answered, her eyes glancing between you and Bucky.

"C'mon Tash. Even I don't heal that fast. Steve?" Bucky asked, looking to his oldest friend for more information.

"Forty three minutes to be exact," he replied. He too glanced at you, although his face betrayed what he was feeling. Despite the utter confusion at how you did it, all Steve could think was you saved his life. Suddenly, Steve Rogers was hugging you. He held you to him tightly. Despite the blood, sweat, and dirt coating his suit, you could still smell his cologne. "Thank you," he whispered.

"You're welcome," you whispered back, unable to even attempt speaking at a higher volume. Seemingly remembering where he was, he let you go, a pink hue blooming on his cheeks.

"Who are you?" Bucky asked, a smirk already appearing on his face after Steve's uncharacteristic display of affection.

"Um, Y/N," you answered, overwhelmed by the number of eyes on you. Luckily for you, Peter was more than willing to explain. He spared no detail in telling the team about your day, starting with swinging through the city and ending with who you've come to know as Natasha interrupting the end of your tower tour.

"So you can heal people?" Bucky asked, being the only one who didn't witness the whole ordeal. "And that's why I'm not dead?" You nodded, still shocked at what you were capable of. Everyone seemed to have questions, but Tony was more than willing to talk about all the tests he and Banner ran earlier.

In the meantime, you healed the others who were hurt. Each time, everyone marveled at the glowing light. Sam's entire head seemed to light up as you healed his concussion. The woman who needed stitches, Wanda, said it felt like a warm hug when you healed the gash on her arm.

When everyone was healed, you stepped back. You didn't want to intrude on the group. Everyone here knows each other. They're like a weird little family. You couldn't just walk in off the street and expect to fit in. It seemed Steve noticed your discomfort, moving to stand by you.

"Thank you again," he started. "I'm Steve Rogers by the way." He held out his hand for you to shake, earning a chuckle from you after his earlier hug.

"Y/N L/N. It's nice to officially meet you," you smiled, feeling more at ease now that you're actually part of a conversation instead of just the topic of discussion.

"And then nothing. That's everything I remember," you finished the story, looking to Peter with a hopeful expression. Your headache only got worse as the story progressed, and it was obvious you were in pain. He narrowed his eyes at you, concerned over how much pain you may be pushing down.

"That's.. yeah. I mean that's what happened," he answered. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," you replied shakily, the headache slowly shifting from shooting pains to a dull throbbing. "I'm fine." The relief you felt was like a weight being lifted. It was only the first step, but remembering the people you apparently live with is a big first step.

"I guess, if you're not too tired, I can show you the rest of the tower now?" Peter offered, unsure if more information was good for you. Although, he knew if you were left alone it could be worse.

You nodded, a small smile on your lips. You had the vaguest idea that you had enjoyed his tour the first time around

-

You were right, Peter's tour was quite amusing. Maybe it was slightly different than 6 years ago, but you still found yourself smiling and laughing as he excitedly showed you all of his favorite parts. However, you had some questions.

"How is it we walked through almost the entire tower, and ran into nobody?" you asked when Peter announced the end of his tour.

"Oh... um," Peter struggled with finding an answer, unsure if this was breaking Tony's rules.

"You can't tell me anything about the time I forgot. You can tell me about now though," you assured him, watching as the tension left his body.

"Okay! Most everyone is training or in their rooms. I didn't show you the gym because you can't use it until your cleared, so I didn't want to tempt you."

"Most?" you questioned, trying to figure out why that word stuck out to you.

"Oh, yeah. Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes left for a mission. They took Wanda with them, mostly because everyone thought it was a bad idea for-" Peter abruptly cut himself off, eyes widening as if he said too much.

"For who? Steve?" you pressed further, trying to figure out why you suddenly felt like there were bricks in your stomach. When Peter didn't reply, realization dawned on you. "He left to get away from me..."

You sat back on the couch behind you, feeling an all encompassing dread. Peter, realizing he'd already given it away, started babbling with hopes of cheering you up.

"It's totally going to be fine! He's gone on missions with less preparation before, and this one isn't even that long. Wanda's there and she knows this mission inside and out-"

Once again, Peter found himself revealing too much. "Why does Wanda know more than him? Was he not supposed to be on this mission? He's just avoiding me?"

Suddenly, another memory popped up, accompanied by another searing pain tearing through your head. You felt woozy, leaning further into the couch to combat the dizziness.

"I can't do this right now, not again. We've already had the same argument over and over," he got up, promptly throwing the door open and speeding down the hall.

"You can't avoid me forever," you screamed after him as he practically ran away. Sighing, you walked through the now open door into the living room.

"Boy problems?" Nat chimed in out of nowhere, reminding you of the very public setting for this latest confrontation. Sighing, you sat down with her and Wanda.

"I just don't get why he's so upset. It's not like I can really be injured," you scoffed at Steve's sometimes overbearing worrisome attitude. "Plus, he puts himself in more danger than I do. Benching me is so unnecessary."

"Y/N, you were shot." Wanda stated the obvious, earning another scoff from you.

"I literally healed on the way home from the mission. I was fine before we even landed!" you started pacing, your frustration with Steve avoiding you boiling over.

"I bet I know why he did it," Nat practically singsonged, a devious smirk adorning her lips. "Someone's following his heart and not his brain."

"What?" you stared, dumbfounded.

"He's got a crush, you moron." Nat spelled it out for you.

"Yeah, I know that's what you meant, but that's not possible. There's no way. It can't-"

"She doth protest too much-" Tony chimed in, having joined your trio just as Nat revealed her theory. You gaped at him, offended. "Let's face it sweetheart, Cap's got it bad for you."

You sputtered an incoherent reply as all three of them simply stared you down. "Really?"

"He's clearly worried about you, even if it seems irrational. You don't think that's coming from somewhere?" Wanda, much more gently than the other two, tried to help you see it.

"Yeah, friendship!" you snarked, not enjoying the feeling of the blush in your cheeks.

"He didn't bench Barnes when he got shot." Once again, Nat was smirking at you.

"I'm leaving now." With that, you abruptly left the room, trying to compose your thoughts. There was no way, right?

-

You later found yourself aimlessly wandering around the city in an attempt to clear your thoughts. To your surprise, you ran into none other than one Steve Rogers in Central Park. The second you made eye contact, you could feel the blush from earlier returning.

"I'm not stalking you!" you abruptly stated as soon as he was within a reasonable distance. It was such a shock to see him in an unofficial capacity. He paused, clearly not expecting that. "I mean, I was just going on a walk." When he still didn't reply, you kept rambling. "Not to find you and argue again. Just to clear my head... and think."

"About what?" Steve finally stepped closer, no longer standing an awkward 5 feet away. Your eyes widened at his question, feeling like a deer in the headlights you blurted a half-truth.

"You," you abruptly threw a hand up to cover your mouth, turning and walking away after 10 seconds of silence.

"What about me?" Steve followed you, walking beside you as you once again aimlessly walked through the city.

"Just something Nat said." He was clearly waiting for more information, but given that this is the first time the two of you have talked without screaming since that mission, you were hesitant to bring it up. "Steve, I-"

"She was right."

You froze, earning a few choice words from the people who had been walking behind you. "What?"

"Nat, she told you I wasn't thinking with my head, didn't she?" Your disbelief only grew as you really registered what he was saying, and the meaning he likely didn't want to imply. "No, not like- dammit. This is not how I wanted this to go." He ran a hand through his hair, seemingly struggling to find the words he was looking for. "I just-"

It was your turn to interrupt him, briefly pressing yours lips to his before backing away just as quickly. He looked starstruck, lips hanging open ever so slightly.

"Are we on the same page?" you asked hesitantly, trying to determine if you now needed to avoid him within the confines of the tower.

"I mean, I have some more I want to say, but overall I think so." Steve stuttered out the reply, clearly still shocked by your actions.

"So, no more avoiding me?" he shook his head. "Promise?"

"Promise."

Your eyelids fluttered as the memory finished replaying in your head, the searing pain coming back with a vengance.

"Y/N?" Peter asked, his voice betraying his worry.

"M'kay" you mumbled. You could barely hear him well enough to stutter out a response, too overwhelmed by the shooting pains causing your vision to blur and the room to spin.

"You're clearly not okay. I'm taking you back to the med bay." Peter reached over to help you up, needing his reflexes to catch you as you slumped over. "Yep, not okay. Not okay!"

He picked you up, fully carrying you to the med bay while your head lolled over his shoulder. "Mr. Stark!" He called as he deposited you onto the bed.

-

"What happened?" you whispered as your eyes fluttered open. This time, you recognized the faces looking back at you. Peter and Tony were now joined by Bruce, each one glaring at a different machine.

"In short, we don't know. You keep passing out." Bruce answered when he finally looked away from the charts he was reviewing. You glanced between him, Peter, and Tony. They each wore a matching expression telling you one thing- they really had no clue.

"This isn't fair," you whined. "I'm just trying to figure out my life."

"Just try to relax, we'll figure it out eventually." Tony rolled his eyes when you just whined some more. "Take a nap then, I can't work while listening to your whining."

You mulled over his words, some vague sense of something coming back to you. Before long, you could fully picture the date at Coney Island- or more accurately the non-date. "Bucky and Sam said we should all go and then ditched us."

"Where are we going?" you asked, still groggy from the surprising wake up call. "Is someone hurt?"

"Nope," Sam answered. "You need a day off. And before you protest, Steve is coming. If he can take a day, so can you."

You were going to protest, but the sound of voices from down the hall cut you off.

"Buck, would you just tell me where we're going? I should really-"

"No," you laughed at Bucky's tone, knowing he was sick of Steve working himself to death. "We're taking a day off. That's all you need to know."

Bucky and Sam nodded at each other in greeting. Together they lead you and Steve out of the tower and into a car, driving away before either of you could come up with a reason to stay behind.

"Any idea what's going on?" Steve asked you, figuring Sam and Bucky were dead set on not telling.

"Unfortunately no," you answered. "Sam woke me up at the crack of dawn and wouldn't even tell me why." As if on queue, you yawned. Steve chuckled at your expression, swiftly apologizing when you glared at him. "I'm not made to be up this early," you pouted.

"Not exactly a relaxing day off if you spend the whole thing tired." Steve muttered just loud enough for the two in the front to hear.

"Take a nap then. I don't want to spend the whole day listening to your whining." Bucky called back, rolling his eyes at Steve's glare.

You decided to take the advice, leaning your head against the window in an attempt to fall asleep. However, with Bucky driving, your head was bouncing up and down off the window, only resulting in more whining.

"Lean on Steve if the window hurts that bad." Bucky mumbled, smirking to Sam. You felt the heat blossom in your cheeks, practically forcing yourself to keep looking forward.

"You can if you want. Lean on me, I mean." Steve murmured, trying to keep Sam and Bucky out of the conversation.

"Thank you," you practicaly squeaked, choosing to just do it rather than stare awkwardly.

Despite the comfort of leaning into Steve, you were too wound up to get any sleep. You simply shut your eyes, allowing your mind to run a mile a minute with what he could be thinking for the entire car ride.

As it turns out, you had plenty of time to spiral. The car didn't come to a stop for nearly an hour. Reluctantly, you drew your head away from Steve's shoulder to better look out the window.

"Coney Island? This is your idea of a relaxing day off?" You glanced at Bucky and Sam in time to see them both roll their eyes.

"Would it kill you to have a little fun? Get out of the car, both of you." You held your hands up in surrender, shrugging at Steve as you followed their directions. To your surprise, neither man followed you out of the car. "We'll be back later. Try to enjoy yourselves."

Before you could protest, Bucky was hitting the gas. The car squealed away from you, too fast for even Steve to try and catch it. You glanced between him and the park eventually pulling your phone out to buy tickets.

"Are you more of a pay-per-ride or full on wristband type of guy?" you questioned, looking up at Steve only when he didn't answer. You found him staring at you, a slight raise of his eyebrow confusing you. "What? You don't want four hours of fun, thrill, and excitement?"

"How ever will we manage it?" he quipped, earning a chuckle from you.

"Sam and Bucky will never believe it." you joked back, smiling when Steve laughed in turn.

And so, the two of you set of to ride as many rides as you could in the four hours before your wristbands expired, fitting in a few breaks for snacks and water. You even managed to convince Steve to end your day on the slingshot arguing about how it was included in the price and he clearly met the height requirements.

"We didn't take a single picture," you lamented as you and Steve walked the boardwalk after eating. "However will we convince them we managed to have fun?"

"I'm pretty sure I saw Redwing following us around at least once... besides, what's stopping us from taking one now?" Steve asked, smiling ear to ear. You grinned up at him, quickly looking around to find someone to take the picture.

"Excuse me, would you take a picture of us?" you asked a teenage girl, knowing she would be able to frame the photo correctly. She nodded, gawking slightly at Steve- but could you blame her?

He pulled you into his side, one arm wrapped around your waist and the other in his pocket. You both laughed as the girl instructed you to move this way and that in order to get the best lighting. Steve glanced between you and the camera, his gaze settling on you almost subconsciously. His smile morphed from one of giddy excitement into a soft, lovestruck grin.

Eventually, the girl seemed happy with the result. You thanked her as you accepted the phone back not realizing Steve still hadn't stopped smiling at you.

"Steve! You're only looking at the camera in like three of the fifty pictures she took!" He snapped out of his state, blushing slightly as you looked through the three photos for which one you should send to Sam and Bucky. "You think they'll come get us anytime soon?"

"Knowing them, they'll milk this day for all it's worth. How about we get some dinner?"

You were nearly screaming as a new round of pain tore through your head, black dots clouding your vision. You could tell someone was talking to you, but you weren't with it enough to understand the words. Before long, the world was once again fading to black.

-

"It doesn't make any sense." Bruce lamented, still going though the various labs and data collected while you were sedated. "The only result even mildly out of the ordinary was such a random drop, it's more likely equipment error than an actual measurement."

You looked over the results in front of you, nodding your agreement. "Even the brain activity?" you questioned, looking through the various results for the correct sheet.

"Unfortunately, yes." Bruce answered, passing you a different tablet with the results you were asking about.

It had been four days since the medical team decided to sedate you after you remembered your trip to Coney Island with Steve, but still nobody could figure out why remembering things made you pass out.

"Maybe it won't happen again?" Your hopeful tone was not lost on the others in the room.

"Hope isn't a very good plan." Bruce spoke up, his expression solemn.

"But for now, it's all I've got." you sighed. "Thank you all for the help. I think I'll just... take a walk." You smiled at Tony, Peter, and Bruce before leaving.

You spent the next few hours wandering the halls of the tower desperately hoping for a new memory while scared of the associated pain. When nothing happened, you decided to take the excursion outside. You sat on the roof, watching the sunset in peaceful silence until the wind started picking up.

It wasn't hard to find the source of the sudden disruption. A quinjet hovered over the landing pad, slowing making its way down. You watched as the wind died down and the door opened, allowing three very tired Avengers to disembark.

You were about to ask how the mission went when you noticed Steve limping down the ramp.

"What happened?" you rushed over to the trio, unsure of how to help once you actually got close enough. Steve just stared at you, unprepared to face you so soon.

"The dumbass got himself shot." Bucky informed you. "Through and through. He'll be fine in a few hours..."

You stopped listening to Bucky after the first sentence. You started acting on instinct, not even second guessing your movements. You knelt in front of the three of them, hovering your hands hovered over the wound. A faint glow emanated from your palms while Steve slowly started leaning less and less on Bucky.

"Why wait a few hours when I can do it in no time." You smiled up at Steve. His small smile pulled at a string in your mind, sending you back in time.

"Stop pacing. He'll be fine." Tony stood to your left, nervously drumming his fingers despite his words.

"Bucky said he got stabbed! With a knife! And it must've been a big knife if it was bad enough for them to have us meet him on the roof!" You would've continued the rant if the quinjet hadn't just come into view.

Tony had to hold you back long enough for the jet to actually land, but the second the door was open you were running onto the jet.

"I told you I should've been on this mission, but no! You said it was just recon! How did he get stabbed doing recon!" you huffed, frantically searching the jet for Steve because you wouldn't stop talking long enough for someone to tell you where he was. Bucky just pointed to the back, not willing to get in the way of your fear induced rampage right now.

You refused to look at his face, knowing the pallid gray tone of his skin would only bring tears to your eyes and prevent you from helping him. Instead, you blindly reached for him, allowing Nat to guide your hands to where hers had just been. You felt the slight warmth from the glow of your hands, still not looking at him.

It wasn't until you heard Steve cough that you reopened your eyes. He still looked like shit, but at least his face had some color to it.

"Where'd all the anger go? He's the one he said it was just recon." Sam mumbled, earning a glare from Bucky and Nat. It did remind you of your fear though.

"I'm mad at you," you pouted. Everyone else took that as their cue to leave, allowing you and Steve the space to talk. "You said it was going to be easy."

Seeing Steve alive and well allowed the fear to dwindle, but the adrenaline rush had to go somewhere. You couldn't stop the tears from rolling down your cheeks.

"Hey, hey, hey. Don't cry. I'm okay. Everything's fine." He wrapped his arms around you, slowly rubbing his hands up and down your back.

"This time!" you screeched, reliving the paralyzing fear of not knowing if he would make it back to you in time. "This is why you should just let me go on missions. If I had been there, then there never would have been any question and you wouldn't-"

"You could've been hurt." Steve argued, albeit weakly.

"I could've been hurt? You were hurt! You nearly died Steve, and-" he cut you off again, this time with a kiss.

"You can come on missions now," he mumbled, lips still touching yours.

"Is that an official offer, Captain?" you smirked. Steve smiled at you, laughing lightly at the sudden change of tone.

"As official as they come. Now let me kiss my girl."

"Y/N? Y/N!" Steve called your name, catching you as once again remembering something incapacitated you. He rushed you to the med bay, Bucky and Wanda hot on his heels. "Tony!"

Tony and Bruce were still in the med bay, going over the test results in hopes of finding something they missed the first seven times. Hearing Steve, they both assumed something had gone wrong on the mission.

"Who is it? What happened?" Tony rushed over, seeing you he relaxed slightly. "Put her on her bed."

"Her bed?" Steve questioned, nonetheless laying you on the bed in the direction Tony gestured.

"This is the sixth time, not including that first one. Every time she remembers something significant, it causes a migraine so bad she faints." Tony sighed, one hand running through his hair and the other looking at vital signs.

"What triggers the memories?" Bucky asked, noticing Steve's inability to process the situation.

"Deja vu basically. Anything with enough power to relate to something from the six years she's forgotten." Tony answered absentmindedly. He was more focused on running the panel of labs as quickly as possible.

"Why?" Steve mumbled, his heart breaking even more at the clear pain you've been in while he was avoiding being here.

"We don't know." Tony answered truthfully, anticipating Steve's anger. He was not anticipating Steve up and leaving the room.

"I never should have let her come on mission." Steve grumbled on his way out.

"Steve, c'mon man-" Bucky called after him, but he wasn't having it.

"I can't be here when she wakes up. What if I trigger another memory? She's clearly in pain. I can't cause more. I won't."

With that, he was gone. Bucky and Wanda turned to Tony, but nobody was sure of what to do. Eventually, Tony noticed the same abnormal drop of serotonin and estrogen.

"Hmm," he murmured. Bucky and Wanda both instantly looked at him. As if he could feel there stares, Tony explained. "We've gotten the same error reading a few times. I wonder if they made it so we wouldn't get accurate results either on the brain function or the labs."

"I wouldn't put it past them. I just don't see what they're trying to gain." Bucky sighed. "Why erase her memories?"

"Maybe they thought they'd be able to use her, but we managed to handle the attack well? They never got a chance to actually capture her." Wanda suggested, cringing as she tried not to directly reference Bucky's past.

"It's definitely possible, but why would they make it painful to recover? It's either there or it's not." Bucky rebutted.

Tony listed in while still going through the results. "Everything still looks normal except for the error... Maybe it's just an effort to get her away from us? With no memories of us, she could've chosen to leave."

"She would never-" Bucky started, but Tony cut him off.

"Stay with strangers who consistently cause her to pass out or go back to living with her best friend?" Tony questioned. "Yeah, before she wouldn't have, and now she probably won't, but it could've happened. Just think about how vulnerable we'd be without her. We haven't exactly been careful since she's joined us on missions."

Bucky and Wanda nodded, finally seeing the point. The conversation would have continued, but all focus shifted to you as you groaned.

"Damnit." You slowly sat up, groaning at the residual ache in your head. You looked around the room, slowly piecing together what it was that you remembered this time. A soft smile grew on your face as you let the memory of your feelings for Steve wash over you. You couldn't help but notice the room was missing a certain super soldier. "Is Steve here? Is he okay?"

The three of them looked at each other, not quite knowing what to say. "He, uh, he's okay. He just didn't want to cause you any more pain." Bucky finally answered you.

"Oh. Well, good that he's okay." You bit your lip, contemplating everything that's been happening. "I think I'll just go to bed for the night. We can regroup in the morning in case there's anything new." You waited for their agreement before you left, slowly untangling yourself from all the machinery. "Thank you for all the help."

-

The next day, you found yourself wanting to give up. You could tell that you had felt something for Steve, and felt it strongly, but it was just out of reach. Despite how badly you wanted it, you couldn't quite get there. Not seeing him at all didn't help. If he even heard you coming down the hall, he high tailed it out of the room.

Wanda found you just after lunch, snuggled under the blankets in your room watching the Reputation Stadium Tour movie on Netflix.

"Hey, can I bother you for a minute?" she asked, hovering in the doorway.

"Sure." You paused the movie, shuffling slightly so she could sit next to you on the bed.

"How are you feeling?" she questioned, easily picking up on your downcast mood.

"I just wish I could remember everything." Your voice broke, tears pooling in your eyes once again. "I wish I knew what could fix it. I wish I could talk to Steve about it because I'm so confused, but I know it's hurting him to not have me remember, but I can't fix it.I just..."

She stroked your hair, trying to comfort you as you cried. When the tears slowed down, she tried to change the subject. "What are you watching?"

"Taylor Swift. Apparently she put out a billion songs in the six years I can't remember, so at least I get to experience those for the first time again," you mumbled. Wanda paused a minute, but then the two of you burst into laughter. "Always look on the bright side, right?"

The two of you laughed and laughed. Everytime you thought you had it under control, one look at each other had you giggling again. Another few minutes, and the laughter died down. You fully sat up, Wanda officially having lightened your mood.

"Did you need something?" you asked, wiping the last few tears away.

"Oh! I was wondering if you'd let me try looking in your head? I thought maybe if Hydra did something to prevent you from accessing the memories like normal then maybe I could see it." She looked nervous as she made the suggestion, but your grin eased her worries.

"Absolutely! I'm willing to do whatever it takes to fix this." You tried not to be too hopeful, but after nearly a week of trying the same thing over and over having Wanda suggest something new was thrilling.

"Okay! Just try thinking about the things you've already remembered and maybe that will trigger something else." Wanda suggested, her hands already glowing red.

You closed your eyes, imaging reliving all of the things you'd already remembered. You pictured waking up in the hospital right after the particle accelerator exploded. You thought about saving Peter and in turn saving Bucky the first day you met the Avengers. Then the memories of Steve floated through your mind. The non-date at Coney Island, the walk in the park when you first kissed him, the feeling of relief when you healed him after that mission. Every single thing you'd remembered.

Throughout it all, you kept trying to calm the hope you were feeling. After each memory, the feeling grew. You couldn't help but think how happy you would be if this worked.

With your eyes closed, you couldn't really tell what Wanda was doing. It wasn't until she cleared her throat that you opened your eyes again. Instantly, you could see the regret on her face.

"Nothing?" you questioned, already knowing the answer.

"I'm sorry. I really thought it could work." You could tell she was genuinely sorry, possibly regretful for even suggesting the idea now that it didn't work.

"It's fine, Wan. I appreciate the help, even if it didn't work. We'll just have to figure something else out."

You smiled at her as she left, genuinely grateful to have friends who care so much. Speaking of friends, you figured it was about time you gave Jess a call. With so much effort going into figuring out your memory issues, you've barely thought about everything that could've happened in her life during the time you forgot.

"Hello?" she answered on the third ring.

"Hi, are you busy?" you asked, realizing she might in fact have a life outside of talking to you. When she replied in the negative, you asked her to meet you for lunch.

"I'd love to! Half an hour?" she suggested.

"Sure! See you soon."

You jumped around the room, getting ready as quick as you could to make it on time. It would've been easier had you already been dressed, but this morning's mood prevented anything productive from occurring. You managed to be ready to leave twelve minutes later, throwing your stuff in a bag and bolting out the door.

"Ah! Sorry!" you yelped when you ran into somebody in the hallway, practically dumping the entire contents of your purse on the floor. "I'm so sorry!" As you repacked your stuff, you glanced up at the person you'd run into. "Steve!"

It was hard to understand the mixture of emotions running through you at the sight of him. To be fair, he seemed to be feeling something similar. You smiled up at him, apologizing again in a softer voice.

"You're still so like you," Steve murmured, his eyes softening. You tilted your head in confusion. "Always in a rush, always smiling for miles."

Your smile faltered, the phrase catching on something in your mind. "Smiling for miles..." you repeated, eyebrows furrowed. Steve caught on a moment later, understanding your confusion.

"It's from a song. One you played for me," he confessed. His words on top of all of your thoughts about hope this morning clued you in.

"But hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have... But I have it. Yeah, I have it." You sang, the song throwing you back in time once more.

"Y/N, this song is sad." Steve argured, but the smile didn't leave his face.

"Yeah, but it's real. It's about life. Plus it's beautifully produced." you argued back, pulling him closer to you. "I'm not saying it's this big love song, but that doesn't mean I can't dance with you while it's playing."

The two of you swayed around the room, simply basking in each other's presence. When the song ended, you continued to hold each other.

"I love you," you whispered, barely audible. Still, you knew Steve would be able to hear it. For a second, you were afraid it was too soon.

"I love you too," he whispered back. "More than I could say."

You could feel the tears, but for once it wasn't from the pain. Sure, your head hurt, but the memory wasn't long enough to incapacitate you.

"Y/N?" Steve questioned. This was exactly why he was avoiding you until he could at least come up with an idea to help you. To his and your surprise, you surged forward and kissed him.

He didn't respond immediately, too caught off guard. It wasn't until his arms wrapped around your back that you realized what you'd done. You pulled back, hands covering your mouth as if you didn't trust yourself.

"Steve, I'm so sorry." Your eyes were wide, expression panicked. Your heart only broke more when his smile faltered. "I have to go. I love- I have to go."

You ran before he could respond. Literally, ran out of the tower and down the street. You knew that he could catch up if he really wanted to, but it didn't matter. The emotions you were feeling after that last memory hurt more than the rest. You could tell that you love Steve, but you had no idea what lead you there. Besides the bits and pieces you'd remembered. It was like you skipped the falling and simply landed in a relationship. You were still cursing yourself for nearly uttering those three words when you made it to the restaurant.

The second Jess saw you, she knew something was up. After convincing her that you wanted to stay for lunch, she finally asked, "what happened?"

You nearly broke down again as you explained everything that happened since you last saw her. You gave her as much detail as you could remember, sighing when you explained how you lost control and kissed him.

"Jess, it was so unfair of me. He spent the last five days avoiding me, and he runs into me one time and it's like I've lost my mind," you complained, wishing for the ground to open up and swallow you.

"Go back a sec, you said there was only one abnormal result?" Jess asked, making you realize something.

"Shit. I wanted to get lunch with you so we could talk about you! You're my best friend and I haven't got a clue what you've been up to for the last six years! Forget my problems for now. Let's talk about you."

"Y/N. What was it?" she asked again. "I haven't lost any of my stubbornness, so you might as well just appease me." You rolled your eyes, but you answered her nonetheless.

"It was an error. It showed a drop in estrogen and serotonin, but there's no way they could actually drop and rise that much that quickly." You expected a response, but when she didn't say anything you tried moving on again. "Can we please talk about you now?"

She shook her head, clearly still thinking about what you said. Slowly, her smile grew and she was taking out money for the food you'd yet to eat. "We have to go."

Despite your protests, she pulled you out of the restaurant. You could tell she was dragging you back to the tower, but you'd yet to figure out why. She refused to stop her train of thought to answer your questions until you were back in the elevator on the way to the med bay.

"Remember how Liz would sometimes get migraines?" she asked you, completely throwing you for a loop. You nodded, vaguely remembering the few times you'd seen it happen. "Well, she was prescribed some meds to regulate some hormones that made them worse."

"Serotonin and estrogen..." you finally caught on to her train of thought. "But how-"

You were cut off by the sound of Steve's voice in the med bay as the elevator doors opened. He was talking to someone else, a voice you didn't immediately recognize.

"Does it make sense?" he asked, a desperate hope coming through in the tone of his voice.

"It's definitely possible. I'll be there in two hours, and I can tell you more then."

You seemed to have caught the tail end of a video call between Steve and the mystery woman. Nobody immediately noticed your presence in the room.

"Serotonin and estrogen are," Jess started, gaining the men's attention.

"Migraine inducing hormones." Steve finished with her, seemingly having already caught up to speed. "I did some digging."

"I can't believe we missed it, but the reading seemed so impossible," Tony lamented, looking more guilty than he should.

"Would someone care to explain what is happening?" you asked, feeling as though they were talking around you. "The result is impossible. What could possible cause my hormones to drop like that?"

"Hydra." The answer came from behind you, Bucky and Sam entering the med bay as well. You merely raised an eyebrow, still not understanding the science behind it.

"They altered your brain chemistry. Accessing your memories involves the hippocampus. They seem to have attached that functionality with a drop in serotonin and estrogen, both linked to migraines."

"Y/N, would you mind?" Tony gestured to 'your bed'. With a sigh, you climbed in and started hooking yourself up to the machinery. You had a million questions, but Bruce kept asking you to stay still. It wasn't long until the lack of movement and the white noise of the other people in the room lulled you to sleep.

"She needs this to work... I need this to work." You could just barely hear Steve as you slowly woke up.

"I don't see why it wouldn't." The mystery woman's voice answered. You glanced in the direction of the noise, trying to understand what was going on.

"Oh good, I was just going to wake you up." The mystery woman walked over to you, a weird tablet in her hands. "I am going to use this to alter your brain functionality." Your eyes widened at her proclamation.

"Okay... and you are?" you questioned, nervous at the idea of annoying messing with your head again.

"Shuri fixed my head after... She deprogrammed Hydra's ability to control me." Bucky jumped into the conversation. "She definitely knows what she's doing even though she's still basically just a kid." Shuri glared at him, but you could tell it was friendly.

"And this is actually going to work?" you asked, still nervous after all the other failed attempts.

"Yes," she answered simply, leaving no room for negotiation.

"Okay, go for it." You laid back down, closing your eyes once again.

"I am going to need you to think of the strongest memory you have from the time you forgot. It will let me target the correct area with much more precision." Shuri instructed. You nodded, eager to get going.

Despite its brevity, you thought of your most recently recovered memory. Dancing with Steve while Lana del Rey sang in the background. You could practically feel his breath in your hair, the smooth fabric of his shirt. You definitely remembered how it felt to say and hear 'I love you' for the first time. It's what lead to your impromptu kiss in the hallway afterall.

You could have stayed in that memory for hours, reliving the simplicity of dancing with somebody you love over and over. In fact, it could have already been hours and you wouldn't have noticed.

"Okay, I'm done." Shuri stepped back, allowing you to sit up.The bright lights made your head spin, but it was nothing compared to the last few days.

"How long has it been?" you asked, still unsure how much time had passed.

"About an hour." Steve answered, his voice causing butterflies in your stomach.

Suddenly, your hand flew to your chest and your jaw dropped. You stared around the room, taking in everything you couldn't believe you forgot. Your eyes sparkled with unshed tears as you looked at all the people surrounding you.

"So, do you remember?" Tony finally asked, but you couldn't take your eyes of Steve once you had located him in the room.

"We got married..." you whispered, too overcome with emotion to speak at a normal volume. "We got married, and I forgot it."

Steve smiled, his own tears pooling in relief. He took the few steps required to reach you, gently taking your hands in his own. "We did."

"Where's my ring?" you questioned, still not quite believing the turn your day took. He silently pulled the ring out of his pocket and slid it onto your finger.

"You don't wear it on missions," he explained, relieved when you nodded in agreement. "I've had it with me since we got back." You laughed through the tears, kissing him quickly but mostly just needing him close.

"Any other major life events I've forgotten? No children running around, right?" you joked. When the room remained silent, you panicked. "If someone runs through that door yelling mommy I'm going to have a heart attack."

Finally, everyone laughed and Steve calmed your fears. "Nope, no children... yet." He whispered the last word just soft enough for only you to hear.

You smiled up at him, more in love than you could've imagined after the last few days.

"You better get on that."

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