The Whale Who Inspired Me
I had a gainer friend who lived in a faraway country, and we used to talk a lot from time to time. I was the first one to text him because I was deeply admired by his massive size on the BiggerCity app. He was incredibly kind and very enthusiastic about gaining weight; he told me that he lived with a feeder, that his weight had reached 700 pounds, and that he never left the house anymore—essentially living the ideal feederism life that many imagine.
At that time, my weight was hovering around 440 pounds, with prominent abdominal obesity; my belly was round, protruding in front of me, and rolled completely independently whenever I walked. I was undisputedly the heaviest and largest person in my office workplace, and my belly would reach my knees the moment I sat down. Given my face, which wasn't very full compared to my body, this contrast caught the attention of everyone who came into my office, and they would stare at my size and massiveness. I felt immensely proud of that because I was a gainer and this was the body I loved, but at the same time, I was trying to maintain this weight to be able to go about my life and work regularly.
I used to talk to him constantly. He would show me his pictures, and we would chat about the enormous amounts of food he devoured. I once asked him, "What is your ultimate goal?" He replied, "I don't have a specific goal, I just want to keep increasing my weight as much as possible," adding that his feeder always told him he had the "stomach of a whale" that could swallow everything. I cannot deny that I deeply enjoyed talking to him and watching his continuous weight gain.
During that period, I was in a relationship with my old friend who was my feeder. He was always trying to push me past my current weight and increase it, taking advantage of his position in my life. According to my faraway friend, his own weight was close to 800 pounds, and he was at the peak of happiness and satisfaction with his size. This somehow made me feel like I wasn't that fat; my 440 pounds compared to his 800 pounds seemed small. Thus, I found myself gradually giving in to my partner’s (the feeder) temptations, and my weight began to increase slowly and unnoticed, masked by the width of my waist at the time.
I started to feel that my body had become heavier, that my belly was rolling out further to the right and left in front of me, and my loose clothes began to grow tight on me. One day while at work, a button on the front of my shirt popped off the moment I sat down, forcing me to unbutton the one above it just to create some space and breathe. An older lady who worked with us passed by, looked at my exposed belly, and said, "I see your stomach has grown in size!" then she walked away. Later during my free time, I began to touch my belly with my hands, feeling the new fat that had accumulated on it; this feeling brought back memories of the old weight-gaining days and filled me with intense excitement. I rushed to the workplace restrooms and masturbated there while playing with my newly expanded belly.
When I returned home and told my partner (the feeder) what happened, he said enthusiastically, "That's wonderful! Didn't I tell you that you become sexier and more attractive with every weight gain?" I also talked to my friend on BiggerCity, and he was very happy for me. At that point, I accepted the idea that it was okay to gain a little more weight, especially with a partner who supported me and loved this about me.
After that, my communication with my faraway friend was cut off for a long time. I accidentally learned from another person who knew him personally through the Grommr website—both being from the same country—that his weight had increased excessively and immensely, and that he had passed away.
When I stood on the scale afterward, I found that my weight had reached 490 pounds, which coincided with my breakup with my former partner, the feeder. I decided then to lose weight until I went back to 440 pounds, but the irony was that most of the weight I lost came from my face and limbs, while the size of my belly remained large and protruding just as it was.
This article was about the "blind pleasure" of weight gain; that pleasure which seems infinite at the beginning when shared with a partner, but comes with a heavy and very harsh price in the end. And right now, at this moment in my life, I weigh over 600 pounds, but it truly wasn't an intentional or planned gain; rather, there were overlapping factors and circumstances that kept making me fatter, and there are other articles where I will reveal the details of this topic.
Rest in peace, my whale friend.
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