too many skeletons in the closet

Professionally diagnosed DID system of however the fuck many parts. NOT an educational blog or resource I'm literally just some dude posting about their brain disorder. I do not care about syscourse

[dissociated-bones]

Hi, many moons ago I used to be the-dissociated-bones and made memes and stuff, it was kind of popular-ish for a very short bit. But my whole tumblr got deleted and i had to remake everything so I'm here now i guess

i have no goals for this blog i just have DID (diagnosed and in recovery for many years now) and think about it occasionally. I'm not an educational resource or trying to do anything meaningful or impactful at all I'm just some dude posting about memes about my brain disorder online

We've been diagnosed/in recovery for 5+ years now so its mostly just silliness at this point.

[pluralpolls]

How old is your oldest headmate? (Like what is their age, not how long have you had them)

a baby

a child (aged 2-10)

a tween/teen (aged 11-18)

a young adult (aged 19-25)

an adult (aged 26-35)

a middle aged adult (aged 36-45)

an older adult aged (46-65)

an elder aged (66-85)

a very wise adult (aged 86-100)

The Ancient One (aged over 100)

Voting ended onJun 4

[abyssalmermaiden]

I'm trying to be just a skeleton but there's some conflict or other I can't figure out with the mod so I'm stuck as a skeleton in panties???

edit: Yes this is ffxiv and yes I did resolve the issue

She’s living her best afterlife

[dissociated-bones]

having DID is dumb and cringe sometimes. i am deadass out here chucking literal tears out of my actual eyeballs in the general direction of the people who have done the most for me in my entire life, the people who gave me everything and to whomst i owe everything i am in turn and im in this moment of the most genuine and painful gratitude i have ever and could ever feel ever and its. its just me man. its just me in different hats. i am sitting here being deadass like "oh you saved my life i owe you everything" to myself??? and its real??? what. the fuck man.

[dissociated-bones]

yeah fair

anyway here is a rebloggable version with all my tag thoughts

[dissociated-bones]

having DID is dumb and cringe sometimes. i am deadass out here chucking literal tears out of my actual eyeballs in the general direction of the people who have done the most for me in my entire life, the people who gave me everything and to whomst i owe everything i am in turn and im in this moment of the most genuine and painful gratitude i have ever and could ever feel ever and its. its just me man. its just me in different hats. i am sitting here being deadass like "oh you saved my life i owe you everything" to myself??? and its real??? what. the fuck man.

[crabussy]

"oh you're part of a system? that must be so awful, having people speaking inside your head and taking over your body to do whatever they want!" it wasn't awful when sunny realised I wasn't drinking enough and filled up a large bottle of water so that I could see it and pour it directly into my cup without getting up. it's not awful when jasper immediately shoots down my irrational fears with calm, kind logic.

[crabussy]

it wasn't awful when francis spent an afternoon at the aquarium instead of me and got to see all the fishes for herself. it's not awful when julian can't contain a snort of laughter in my head at something we both heard or saw. it's not awful when phoebe procrastinates on assignments to play beatsaber until she's sweaty and bored. it wasn't awful when jon sat outside on the porch late at night, talking quietly to a neighbour's cat. it's never awful when any of the others chime in about everyday tasks and decisions and ideas. it's not awful when I come back and see that my house is suddenly tidy. it's not awful when I come back and it's messier.

[crabussy]

we're just people moving through our lives with one body between us. we have just as many small joys, irritations, helpful moments, poor choices, fits of giggles, bad times, and affectionate interactions as anybody else on earth. you can't decide we exist in a state of constant misery from our mode of existence alone. I love my crew.

[crabussy]

it's been nearly 8 years since I figured out that I wasn't alone in here. in those 8 years, we've all been through so much shit. we've also made so, so many good memories. I truly wouldn't want to live any other way.

I hope you're kind to the systems in your life. you have a very real power to make being part of a system less awful, just by listening and treating us like real people. and is that not wonderful? [:

[8nin]

i don’t have a nervous system. i am a nervous system

[r0ttingsystem]

Being a system is so weird like my mummy and daddy didn't like me so now I'm sans the skeleton

[anti-willo-siffrin]

i think that introjects should be allowed to keep their source private if they want to, whether its due it being problematic or not

theres a lot of systems out there that are very very uncomfy with the way introjects are treated in system spaces, so i think its okay if someone doesnt want to disclose whether their alters are introjects or not! thats not information that anyone else is required to know! and if it makes you feel a little bit better with your identity as an alter, then why not do what makes you happy?

this isnt to say that introjects can never talk about their source!! its a very nuanced topic and i think more people need to view it from the standpoint of just letting others do whats comfy for them, whether you would do the same or not

[system-search]

Just a reminder for systems, you don't owe people an explanation for anything, especially not your trauma

Don't tell people your triggers, especially any negative ones

You don't even have to tell them your name if you don't want to, you don't have to tell anyone all your alters/headmates names, you don't have to tell anyone how many alters/headmates are in your system

You don't owe anyone every detail about your system, especially if it can be used against you

[moonjay-the-forest-spirit]

An experience I have that I haven't seen talked about in system spaces is being incredibly uncomfortable looking at photos of yourself when another alter was fronting.

Like I can't even bring myself to look at them, I just can't. If I notice a new video or photo of me or even a voice message that I sent to someone that I don't remember taking I get a sick feeling and really want to delete it without even taking a proper look. And when I do look/watch/listen? I just freak out. That's not me. But it's my face. My voice. Anyone else looks at it and they'll see me but it's not and that drives me mad.

It's the same with old photos and videos as well especially from childhood I get so freaked out when our mom tries to show us or other people old pictures of when we were little. I even lash out sometimes and I can never explain why just "don't show me that. I don't want to see it" maybe other people just take it for embarrassment? That's normal to be embarrassed of yout old baby pictures. But it's not embarrassment idk what it is but it's a truly awful feeling. I never want to see an old picture of me again.

[lumberjackloverboy-moved]

for my fellow psychotics who struggle with thinking someone is in their house, a method I’ve found that really works are these guys:

i put them on my front door and anytime it opens they ring. that way if i think someone has broken in or i see someone who isn’t there i can think back to if the bells have rung, and if they haven’t i can assure myself it’s not real. obviously it’s not fool proof, like if you are prone to auditory hallucinations, but it has really helped me calm down in time to avoid major psychotic breaks. it’s a real lifesaver

nonpsychotics encouraged to rb

[silence-is-underrated]

No actually they're loud as fuck

[dissociated-bones]

lowkey kinda love it when someone gives you the generally kind of helpful advice of "make a persona for the task" but you literally have DID so its like "I did in fact already make a whole persona for that. its me btw. i am the persona for the task. i still do not want to do it." idk its just mildly funny

[dissociated-bones]

no context post but yall my system primary protector just cannot catch a break

[debarkedd]

trauma so bad my coping mechanisms have names and pronouns

[dissociated-bones]

experiencing your own music library on shuffle whilst high when you also have Different Person Disorder can be an absolute treat, very fun game, or absolute fucking hell depending on which part you are

also why am i torturing myself and why is it so fun