Living in darkness
For the first time in my life (or adult life) I feel productive. Stressed, but productive. Is this because every day is so sunny and warm? Of course, the heat can be exhausting and itâs hard to do anything, when even sitting makes you sweat like a pig, but itâs so much better than darkness.
Iâm wondering if living a year in a sunny paradise where the sun shines for 12 h per day has helped me change? In Finland, I feel excited about summer, I feel energetic, happy, everything seems possible. But normally around this time of the year, in early November, the nature dies and the darkness sets in. Itâs a fact that we have many people who get depressed in winter because of the darkness. It makes you feel tired, depressed, powerless and strips you of your motivation to get up in the morning.
I have for long struggled with being easily stressed, not being able to finish projects and feeling tired and depressed. But now, for the first time in my life, I feel like I have things under control, Iâm learning new skills and doing things that would stress me out before. Iâm making lists, meeting deadlines and looking for jobs. Is this because Iâm getting older and finally more responsible? Or is it because I donât need to waste energy fighting the looming darkness outside of my window?
