divine ruins.

private mutli muse blog. -   -   -   -   -   -   -    the people are screaming    the prophets are singing    & the city is burning, burning,    b u r n i n g

[divineruins]

ircnforged:

                 “okay for the millionth time, my answer is NO unless you’ve come bearing a bottle of pinot grigio.”

      “ you should know me well enough, bellisario, to know i will not turn away that easily. if you open the door i just might have a bottle of wine in the car. ”

[divineruins]

ircnforged:

                 “what? it’s my house – i’m allowed to SNOOP. what business do you have sneaking around like that anyways?”

     “ i’m not sneaking around - i think you’re being PARANOID, eva. ”

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven​.

she knew what she was doing… he didn’t. with basic medical training and his extensive knowledge of the human anatomy the prospect of delivering their baby at home if things went awry was still terrifying. first aid and torture ability were not going to help. “—we should probably head downstairs now, before they get worse.”.

ava knew - no, she felt that Wyatt was right. her body was progressing quickly in preparation… and walking would be good. short pants escaping. “ -- downstairs… mhm…” but with each step toward the stairs it were gearing up, and she sensed it… a sharp inhale of breath, stopping. the pressure too much to continue forth. another contraction? willa shifting? could she be… “wyatt -”

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

it was almost funny, really, how the man went so far as to enjoy pain in others…yet this other’s pain was his worst nightmare. for the first time since his return from overseas he became almost visibly bothered by the sight of pain in someone else. almost - he had to remain strong for her, her rock, in her time of need. that was exactly what he was going to do. “ on it. “ he was quickly back into the bedroom, calling the maternity ward by the time he was back by her side. not knowing what on earth she needed him to do, he went with his gut, and until she told him not to he’d massage her shoulders, neck and back, knowing it was supposed to help some women. on loudspeaker the phone rang whilst he began at her neck.

as many times as ava had told herself she were prepared for this moment... she just weren’t. rightfully so, just as she would say to any other patient: there was no way to prepare the body and mind for it, but to let it happen, and know the good outcomes. however, like a doctor - and like most women who’ve had children - she knew too well for all outcomes. ava spoke fast and quick over the phone, trying to keep relaxed under wyatt’s touch, to explain.   “ ------ you know the recommendation is you should be here. ”   the midwife finally said. ava almost rolled her eyes.   “ people - people have babies at home! i - i know what i’m doing --- ”   a deep breath, and she urged him to her lower back.   “ - tell harlock she... better keep a damn eye on that pager. ”   with that, ava clicked the end call button in time for another contraction.   ( they were coming quick - willa was coming quickly )   this time, progressively worse than the last; jaw gritting & rippling through her entire abdomen like a wave. the tears then quick to come as she reached for wyatt’s hand, the sink in her other. 

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

“ oh. “  she knew best. within moments the heating pads had been acquired, and as he attempted to open the packet her sudden struggle became apparent. not so instinctively this time he did what he’d learned during one of their prenatal classes, and applied a gentle massage to her lower back area. “ was that a contraction? “

another gush overtook between her legs.   “ mmmhhhhm.”   she grit out with a slow nod. her tight grip yet to cease even as the sensation began to dissipate, eyes growing wet. oh god...   “ ---where... your phone. we can - we can time them. ”   she explained. they would only get worse too. still, ava didn’t fancy making a trip up to the hospital any sooner than absolutely needed. doctors, well, they didn’t make the best patients, of any sort.

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven​.

he instinctively placed a hand to her back and began to rub. “ heating pad? why don’t we get you in the bath? “ he suggested. the warm water might help and it would solve the leaking issue…but he looked around for the pad as he found the maternity pads anyway, in case. all the while his state of calm remained. this… it wasn’t that hard.

a bath...   “ i wish. ”   it would be nice right about now. she leaned upon the sink as wyatt looked around. maybe the trial run had prepared him best... though where he didn’t quite know what was to come - ava did, and it were a lot more than this. just as the thought arose a pang burst through her back unexpectedly. she winced lightly betwixt her teeth.   “ the risk of... infections... but thank you...”   the pain soothed only to move into her abdomen, the sink clutched with pale white knuckles.

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven​.

wyatt was quick to stand, rounding the bed to help her. as he caught her eyes and realised her unease, his own began to dissipate quickly. replaced with a calm he smiled at her, knowing the affect they had on her. “ let’s get you in the bathroom then. “ he helped her up slowly, an unfaltering arm upon her lower back. “ are you in any pain? “ one step at a time he helped her to their bathroom.

how he managed to bring a wave of calm - as calm as she could be - with just a look she’d never know but god were she thankful. ava were also thankful for the en suite in that moment, slowly making her way.   “ no, no. it doesn’t hurt, ”   her water breaking... she shuffled, as if the mention of it were enough to initiate it further.   “ but my back is--- ”   the contractions she could sense were coming soon. it made her heart pound.   " screw the scrubs. the heating pad... "

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

why was she so calm? she was a doctor, he then remembered, of course she was calm. “ i’m…not going to panic. “ there would not be a repeat of last time. which had been more than a little embarrassing. he’d been fine under heavy enemy fire in afghanistan, handled more than a little unnerving situations for oliver yet he’d completely gone to pieces during her trial run. “ don’t worry… what do you need me to do? “

as soon as ava stood... who in the hell had invented carpeting? another gush. she’d seen it before, but never felt it, and were moved to sit back on the edge of the bed.   “ uhh. ”   what did she need him to do? this weren’t a hospital - he wasn’t one of her residents - and she currently was not a doctor on duty rather a mother in birth. a mother who would be giving birth in just short amount of time... it was less easier to prepare for.   “ i need the maternity pads... the pair of scrubs outta the top drawer. ”   bought for if this situation were to arise. they were comfy, at the least. her eyes finally turned to meet his, the nerves shone.   “ ------i need you to help me to the bathroom.”

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

@divineruins

“ ava. “  wyatt opened his eyes wondering what he could feel… the sheets were becoming soaked.  “ ava? what’s happening? is that… “  her waters breaking?

"huh..."   ava were quickly - as quick as she could - sitting upright... the gushing sensation her confirmation. willa would be on her way.   “ ------don’t panic. ”   she sat there for a moment. there were two possibilities: contractions could start riveting immediately or they’d take their time... either way, they couldn’t do anything until she were dilated. an expelled breath.   “ - we still have time. ”   although she didn’t fancy sitting in the bed much longer, moving to stand.   ( induce labor - walk around )   clean herself up...

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

a brow rose—he hadn’t ever thought much of his stories. had always felt a little awkward…scared of her even, never feeling confident as a father. but he was glad she remembered something. “ you’d drive her crazy, “ he remembered with another small curl of his lips. “ – got that from your father she used to say…”

i didn’t know how else to get you there...   but she didn’t say that. this time it were her turn to mirror his upturned lips.   “ apparently i get a lot from you. so i’ve been told. ”

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

her small smirk was mirrored.  “ it wasn’t anything too exciting. you were refusing to sleep as you would sometimes…your mother called me. “  she behaved for him. settled nicely. he couldn’t count how many times she had fallen asleep on his chest. “ you don’t remember those times at all? “

“ i --- ”   she looked away momentarily. did she? well, bits & pieces. a lot of it purposefully placed to the back burners of her minds depth.   “ i remember things... i remember waiting for you to come and... pulling tantrums until mom called you. it uh - it mostly always worked. "   a beat. a brief pause---   “ you told the best stories. ”   he’d made her feel safe.

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

the line was taking forever and it seemed they were in for a wait. sal let the engine die and sighed. “ you still haven’t told me what you want. “ a slight pause, then, before - “ your mother took it. you were two. wouldn’t stop talking… “

“ just a coffee. two cream. two sugar. a bagel... ”   she wasn’t feeling all too hungry. just wanted to get to boston - and that were really saying something.   “ have i ever stopped talking? ”   a side glance at him, a small smirk. they were both quieter individuals. okay with silence, preferring it mostly.   “ ---i wish i remembered. ”   she’d been young.

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

she seemed fascinated with it. he hadn’t meant for her to stop looking but rather merely conceal the extraordinarily large amount of money. he didn’t mention that, though. “ —– you seem surprised. “

he cared and well, sometimes it was hard to tell... she shrugged, not wanting to seem too affected by it. in reality, it touched her. she only wished they were as close now as they appeared in the picture.   “ i just--- ”   what?   “ i’ve never seen it before. ”

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

paranoid?  not the money.  what made him paranoid was a price on his daughter’s head.  “ relax. “  as he took the money he turned his head to find her looking at something. he quickly realized what and sighed. she found everything didn’t she?  “ val. close the bag. “

how hadn’t she seen it before? maybe because the only copy of it belonged to him. her fingers dragged over it... he looked younger, happy... happier, at least. she were tore from thought at his voice, quickly zipping the bag up and pushing it back down beneath her legs. the photograph dropped back inside but val certainly wouldn’t ever forget it.   “ you carry a picture of us? ”

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

the drive to boston was long to say the least, but between their frequent change overs and motel stops it was manageable. sal drove them into the dunkin doughnuts drive through queue – another coffee run to keep them going. “ what are you having? “ he asked, “– hand me some cash out of my bag will you? “  no harm now, he supposed. she’d already seen it… “ just be discreet. “

“ doesn’t it make you paranoid? ”   she questioned, but went right on ahead grabbing the money from the bag, keeping it low & casual. " it makes me paranoid. " she added. when was grabbing out money to pay for food not casual? what had this turned into? as she pulled out the cash and handed it to him her eyes found something catching the light... a glossy photograph to which fingers quickly grabbed for, examining it... never had she seen it before but val didn’t need to be told who it was.

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

“ i could cry. ye make me wanna fuckin’ cry, “ he yelled back.  “ ye i’m done. c’mon. “  he held his hands up, having dropped the pads.  it was time to let her really let loose… he’d probably regret it later, but she needed it he was sure.

once all her energy were released, anger put into hits, aileen knew there’d be tears of her own... they, however, wouldn’t be shown to anyone else. she wasted no time with his approach, moving in with clenched fists. away she pounded; a vigor not displayed in a long, long, long while... smashing all the things that used to be - could have been.

[divineruins]

@pxwerdriven.

and there it was again - feeling utterly foolish. not a feeling he wanted to make a habit of experiencing. “ maybe. ”  most definitely… but was it that easy? no.   opening up had come at such a cost, and he never ever wanted to feel as rejected and hurt as he had done that day.   “ — i’ll think about it. “

a long sigh. a bit of silence.   “ think long & hard. ”   they weren’t going to crack. not one of ‘em. it’d take a lot.   “ if ye love ‘er - it’s worth it. i don’t know how much easier it gets. ”   her eyes moved to james momentarily... it really didn’t get any simpler.   “ and she’s mullin’ over the same damn thing don’t ye think otherwise. i gave ‘er an earful too. ”   far more than she were jasper...   “ just - ye. think about it. do that. ”