DnD stuff

Follow my DnD hijinx as i make cool NPCs and stuff :)) Any pronouns, occasional 18+ content (Not pron tho) Banner is by: https://x.com/FromHappyRock?s=20 Pfp is by: https://www.reddit.com/user/ChickenMobile/

[dndstuffandhijinx]

Npcs!

I'm working on some cool and funny npcs for my dnd game. The pourpose is if i want to have a unique or funny interaction with my players i can pull an npc (Like Steve) from a list i have. If anyone has any ideas for an npc (or just anything cool for dnd) feel free to talk about it !! :))

[nowhereelsetopost]

I have never wanted anything more

[dndstuffandhijinx]

Idea for a silly npc (i'll elaborate further later today): basically he's a human artificer who sleepwalks and is unequivocally sure he is schizophrenic. The reason for this is because everytime he walks around his house he constantly hears voices. The actual reasoning for these voices is actually quite simple. When artificers start at 1st level, they gain "magical tinkering" which allows them to do a variety of things. One of these things is being able to record messages into various objects. This ties in with the fact that he sleepwalks, and when he does he records messages into various objects around his house.

[dndstuffandhijinx]

I like his invention tbh

Mark has always been an inventor, his only problem being that his inventions already exist. He once tried to pitch his invention “The place of fire” this being a fireplace. He has spent years on his latest invention, and he believes that this will bring him fame and fortune beyond his comprehension. The “Transportation circle”. Mark has invented the wheel. When met with PCs he will try to set up a pitch meeting with them. When pitched to PCs he’ll present a prototype and it’ll just be a normal wheel. If PCs choose to tell him that this has been an invention for a while he will be in utter disbelief and go home absolutely defeated.

“I swear I'm the one to invent this guys! And it’s not a wheel! It’s a transportation circle!” - Mark

[dndstuffandhijinx]

Being a werewolf is awesome guys i swear!

Otsana is not only an amazing saleswoman, she is an amazing werewolf. She became a werewolf at the age of 14 when she was walking in a forest and got jumped by a werewolf. Despite this incident she has always been very charming and proud of who she is. So proud in fact that she tries to sell becoming a werewolf to anyone and everyone who will listen. Most people are actually sold up until the part where she explains how they will become a werewolf, by biting them. She always explains that it’s not “That painful” and is only “The most agonizing pain i’ve ever experienced” but it’s totally worth it. The perks of being a werewolf is that she sometimes can just force it on some if they’re not sold. 

“Come on guys, it’s awesome being a werewolf you have to try it! I mean yeah, the process is equal to being burned alive, but it’s totally worth it. What are the perks you ask?..... Don’t even worry about it, just trust me! It’s awesome” - Otsana 

[dndstuffandhijinx]

He's not a vampire guys, just a bit of a twink

Falqarim is a young, half elf adult who has recently inherited a good chunk of money from his recently deceased father. While Fal is devastated over his fathers death, he’s also ecstatic that he doesn't need to work for at least the next couple of decades. While Fal is a pretty normal guy he is also very flamboyant, and wears very nice clothes, and while seeing him in the daytime he wears a very large sun hat that acts almost as an umbrella. He refuses to take it off, and the only time he’s seen without it is when he takes his nightly walks. When he is asked about the hat he will instantly become defensive claiming that it’s just good fashion, and he is definitely NOT a vampire. When asked about how his father died he will tell PCs that he was killed in the night, stabbed twice in the neck. Upon further investigation into this murder PCs will come to find that his father (Named Davhorn) was in fact not stabbed but bitten. When Fal is asked about this he will assure the PCs that he definitely had nothing to do with it, and that (again) he totally isn’t a vampire. If it is discovered that he is a vampire he will try to pay hush money to the PCs.

“Guys, I swear I'm not a vampire, and I also didn’t kill my father to get his inheritance, he was stabbed i’m telling you!. I know I dress exactly like a vampire, and I refuse to take my umbrella-like hat off, but that’s just fashion baby. Not my fault you don’t know how to dress properly.” - Falqarim (He snaps his fingers after saying this btw)

[dndstuffandhijinx]

Disleksya or wuteva

Mandy is an aspiring wizard who is very passionate about spellcasting, looking up to anyone who has made it as a wizard. She has spent years researching scrolls, and studying the ways of many great wizards. Nobody she has asked has wanted to take her under their wing for one reason. She can’t read. Mandy is dyslexic and therefore can’t read. She has studied one scroll for 4 years and still hasn’t decoded it yet. The only reason she hasn’t become a fully fledged wizard yet is because she can’t read any spell scrolls. When talking to her and inquiring about the spell scroll pcs will come to find that she is in fact not reading from a spell scroll, but instead a recipe for potato leek soup. If this fact is revealed to her she will be very shocked that nobody has told her this in the 4 years she has been studying it.

“This won’t deter me from becoming a wizard. And it isn’t all bad! I now know how to make potato leek soup…. or not really, still can’t read to be honest” - Mandy

[dndstuffandhijinx]

Magic is pretty cool!

Almos Durjahn is a male dragonborn who has recently woken up with a magical rune on his back. Normally this would mean cool and powerful magic that can help in adventures and such. However this is not the case. This rune is a rune of wild magic, and everytime Almos’ name gets spoken within a radius of 100 feet the rune triggers and releases wild magic. He wears normal peasant rags with a name tag on his chest.

“I used to think that magic was cool, and it is… when you can control it that is… and when the thing that triggers the magic is your name, it makes it a little hard to make friends.” - Almos Durjahn

[dndstuffandhijinx]

There are snakes in my pants!

Leo Truegust is a half elf male traveling merchant. He sells adventuring gear and tools. He’s a bit of an odd guy and speaks frantically to pcs, making himself a little unintelligible. Everything about him otherwise seems normal, except for the fact that he refuses gold or any other normal kinds of currency, and will only accept snakes. When seeing him he wears a large backpack with a hat like roof at the top. Attached to the roof is a pulldown table to conduct business on. He wears normal peasant rags but his pants are a little peculiar as he has stuffed them with hundreds of snakes.

“Gold is overrated, snakes are where it’s at, I'm telling you. I reckon it’ll catch on one day” - Leo Truegust

[dndstuffandhijinx]

Time travel!

Hutealda Testtube is a time traveler from 500 years in the future. She wanders around trying to find her time machine. This would be easy as a time machine would stick out like a sore thumb, only problem is that the machine is entirely invisible. Hutealda is a scientist from 500 years in the future, and a pretty smart one at that. In order to fit in she wears a comically stereotypical peasant outfit. Due to this fact she gets either weird or pitying looks from others. When speaking to her she will try her best to convince PCs that she is indeed a peasant from their time. She is very fidgety and paranoid.

“Making my time machine invisible seemed like a pretty smart idea at the time you know. If nobody can find it, nobody can steal it. Unfortunately the “nobodies'' that it was supposed to be hidden from, also included me. On the bright side, i now have 500 years of hindsight”  - Hutealda Testtube

[dndstuffandhijinx]

This is Steve.

Steve is a very normal guy. He is a human commoner who is always tired. Steve isn’t too thrilled to talk about women, sex or general degeneracy, not that he’s a prude; he's just grown tired of it as he lives with a succubus. When asked about this peculiar situation he will explain how it started out as awesome, as the succubus, named Sarah, would fulfill his wildest dreams, but after a while it just became a bit of a chore. Steve will work as an accountant for whatever bar is in town when met.

 “Everybody expects it to be awesome all the time because succubi can quite literally fulfill your exact desires. But the thing is, my desire is to not have sex. And succubi NEED semen to live. It. Fucking. Sucks.”  - Steve