I BELIEVE @dolly--wilde - Tumblr Blog

Good people are reincarnated into kittens that are adopted by girls with big naturals

yeah sure ill reblog that

moeuo-deactivated20210807

I've seen people argue that BDSM & kink is bad because of aftercare. "You don't NEED aftercare or safewords for vanilla sex, because it's not harmful!"

Uh, hate to tell you but aftercare and safewords do exist for vanilla sex. It's getting your partner a glass of water after. It's cuddling and compliments. It's asking if they're feeling good during. It's words like stop, no, easy. It's asking if there's anything to make it better next time.

If you really don't practice communicating and aftercare with your partner regardless of how vanilla it is or not, you're just not a good partner.

cumaeansibyl

I feel like these are people who have never experienced their emotions going way the fuck sideways during vanilla sex and the subsequent need to be comforted and talked down. must be nice!

there's no type of sex that doesn't come with some chance of Big Feelings, no matter how casual or low-stakes or vanilla it is, because people just have Big Feelings sometimes. you don't have to think of it as "emotional aftercare" if you don't want but you should probably have some idea of what to do if one of you starts crying, just saying.

biglawbear

Also? Sometimes doing totally vanilla sex stuff you've done a million times before with that same person suddenly hurts today for no reason! And you need to know how to communicate to stop or respond to being asked to stop and then check in after.

mewwon

Things I have learned this year

1. People don’t have to accept your apologies, they don’t even have to hear them. Sometimes you gotta live with the fucked up shit you did. Nothing is gonna make it go away or make it any better.

2. You don’t EVER have to beg someone for an apology. If they are unwilling to change or unwilling to reconcile their actions, move tf on.

3. Nevertheless, you don’t have to forgive to move on. Just move on, at your own pace, take time to heal . Even in the beginning if it is purely out of spite.

4. A quiet existence is much better then a chaotic one.

5. If someone you love makes fun of your gender identity, comments on your weight, or refuses to educate themselves on your mental illness don’t make excuses for them, just get TF OUT before it gets worse.

6. Create art that doesn’t hurt to make, create art that you love and that doesn’t make you cry when you read back through it but makes you laugh makes you excited, wakes you up.

7. Listen to music that makes you happy, watch tv shows and movies that make you happy. It effects your emotions, listen to your body.

8. LISTEN TO UR BODY. Feed yourself enough, take long showers, cry until you can’t, dance, move, workout, go on walks

9. Don’t forget to dream, when things were at there worst that’s what got you through the day.

10. Never stop growing, grow so that you treat people better, grow so that you love better, grow so that you never let anyone treat you the way that they did.