The Road is Long ☙
packdivided
He didn’t push the issue any further. Besides it wasn’t like she owned him anything in particular, much less a smile for the gratitude of a stranger who didn’t know much about her, that she was alive. Damon wasn’t especially educated in matters of modern human psychology, but even he understood the principle behind survivor’s guilt. It was probably something he had himself experienced when his mother had passed away… as well as at other times in his life, though those times might have been different in terms of the hand he had played in his own misfortune. But that was not something he liked to think about. He preferred to think about how satisfied he was with the fact he had outlived his father. Because in reality the true loss of his father hadn’t been when Giuseppe passed away. No, it occurred before that… it occurred in the constant berating, the constant disdain his father harboured towards him. It happened in the small and the large betrayals, and the cruelest of all was the last one. In reality, he’d been so foolish to hope for his father’s love and approval still. Ugh thank goodness validation was a human thing. Or so he told himself. “Thanks. It was a long time ago so don’t worry about me.” He wanted to tell her that it got better, at least for him it did, but he knew that now was definitely not the time in her grieving process to say so. Instead he decided to simply state something about himself. “It’s not easy losing your parents, it took me a while to get over my mother’s passing in particular but in the end, it might sound strange but there are certain experiences I’ve had since then that I might not have gotten if she’d still been around. I miss her but I like to think she watched over me and kept me going in her on way.” Okay maybe that was a bit of an embellishment but he was careful not to specifically say he hoped she was proud of him. Because if that were a thing, she certainly wouldn’t be proud of him. Luckily, as a vampire he no longer cared. Or, he’d convinced himself of that fact. He was grateful to take the conversation away from what was obviously still a fresh wound for her, and an awkward subject for him. Not that Zach wasn’t awkward, but it was a different kind of awkward, a kind that almost amused him. “Eh you know. Unfinished business. Stuff.” He was purposely vague almost as if he were making a joke in the third degree, but her blush didn’t go unnoticed at his next words, and his heart (what was left of it), skipped a beat for half an instant before he suppressed a smirk. Maybe getting close to her wouldn’t be so hard after all. “Yeah, I would. It’s a pretty swanky crib, I wouldn’t mind having to myself… or sharing it with select company,” he glanced at her, right after she turned crimson and attempted to tease him. “Whoa, easy there tuck your claws back in kitten. Guess you’ll just have to find out how awesome I am for yourself,” he pursued. He waved her notion of not having to pay with a hand gesture. If only she knew that he didn’t any money at all so it wasn’t any trouble, but even if it were the case… “Don’t worry about it, I might be a bit of a rascal these days but I was raised as a Southern gentleman. You’re the only one welcoming me back in this town, the least I can do is buy you dinner.” If only she knew how truly, he was literally raised as a gentleman from the antebellum south. Not that he’d always acted like it, but certain manners and maures were ingrained notions at this point. He hailed the waiter over. “A primavera pizza for the lady. And I’ll have the steak dinner. Cooked rare. Do you want anything to drink, Elena?”
Elena was glad that he didn’t throw a million questions at her, she really was. Everyone else tried to figure it all out and it was exhausting - because she didn’t have any answers ; She didn’t know why the accident happened. She didn’t know why she didn’t drown. She didn’t know how she was saved, leave alone who saved her - because someone must have... the only questions that were worse than those that she could not answer were the ones she could’ve answered ; Why were they out on the bridge that night? What was the last thing they said to you? Did you say goodbye to either of them? Elena had those answers, but she couldn’t give them to anyone. She simply couldn’t. Just thinking about it made it hard for her to stay at this table.
But she wanted to stay.
Having dinner with a stranger was not the most normal thing in the world, she had to admit that, but it seemed like an important first step. It was better than getting up to rush back to her room to cry for hours, that was for sure.
The brunette shot him a slightly confused look when he said that it happened a long time ago. He didn’t look that old, so maybe they passed when he was still young. God, that was even worse, wasn’t it? At least she had memories to hold on to. Her brown eyes searched for his own and she gave him a gentle smile. It was still small, but it was absolutely sincere. “I am sure she did. I am sure she still does.” It was the same thing that kept Elena going ; she wanted to survive to make the memories her parents couldn’t make. She wanted them to be proud, even in death. “Sorry.” She laughed after a moment, just to distract herself from the burning sensation in her eyes. “I’m sure this is not what you had in mind when you walked over. I won’t hold it against you if you decide to make a run for it.” She was pretty much the worst company in the world right now.
“If that was supposed to sound mysterious, it worked.” Elena rolled her eyes in a slightly more playful way as she tried to remind herself how to breathe. Jesus. Was it so hard not to cry or to blush?
Select company? A quiet laugh slipped from her lips as she shook her head at him. “What? Are you going to be the new host for all of the house parties?” The rest of the town would probably be all over it, but while she used to love parties that definitely wasn’t on her to-do list right now. “Are you even old enough to stay home without a guardian?” It was a tease, at least partially. Elena was curious to hear the answer too, but he didn’t have to know that. “One of us seems to be convinced that you’re awesome. I think that’s good. It won’t hurt as much if the other doesn’t agree.” She joked, but she ended up giving him another smile. Hey, this was getting a little easier! “Well, thank you, Damon. It’s... sweet of you.” Even if that didn’t mean that she was down with it, but they could argue about that later.
Her eyes went a little wider when he hailed the waiter over to their table, but her shoulders dropped in relief when she saw that it was not Matt. Of course this was not a date, but it would have been awkward if her ex boyfriend had to tend to her wishes as well as those of a very handsome stranger. It was better this way, even if he was probably around here somewhere and saw them anyway. “Just a water, thank you.” That was the downside of being under aged. Elena certainly could have used something a little stronger in this moment. “The steak is an excellent choice, by the way.” But he probably already knew that.