After all these years I still get goose bumps every time I hear those Bulgarian chants. I still know it so well I can say the lines along with them, I still love ‘Is there a doctor in the House?’ and ‘The Price’, I still have some of the Bitter Suite and Lyre, Lyre soundtrack in my phone, I still can’t stand ‘MWFS’ episode and I still find Najara phony as hell, but I still get up saying “I’ll rise but I refuse to shine”, and if it happens to be a rough morning I’ll still say “You know how I am when I miss breakfast”. I still have a mild orgasm every time I hear Xena screaming “you b-i-i-i-t-c-h” at Alti and I still point at any light-haired horse and go “there’s Argo!” My heart still skips a beat every time I hear the wind whistling through cracks and window frames as it takes me straight to ‘Ides of March’, not to mention that I still choke at the end of it when their souls are hovering above their crucified bodies. I can still feel the adrenaline rush when the Dark Chakram turns into the Chakram of Light and Xena goes “It’s good to be back”. I still laugh my ass off at Gabrielle’s baffled face when Xena says she is pregnant: “Xena? – I mean, when did you….? Who d….?” loooool ... I still worship the writer’s geniality to deal with Callisto’s ending (or should I say her new beginning?) I still readily reply “I have many skills” whenever I’m paid a compliment and I still giggle on the inside every time I hear someone say ‘xenophobia’ as no one would understand my own personal definition of this word. I still can’t hide my awkwardly happy face whenever I meet someone called Gabrielle (can I call you Gaby?) I still defend the show at every occasion and I still think it tops many other new ones out there. I also still talk about it to newbies. I still look forward to visiting NZ. I still have a soft spot for leather. I still briefly grieve for Kevin every time I see Ares. Whenever I’m on the phone holding a pen, I still doodle chakrams or akin to. And since the word ‘akin’ reminds me of ‘Akemi’, If I’m still here on this earthly world for the show 50th anniversary, I am STILL going to say that I will never get over that ending and I will most definitely still feel that familiar emptiness when Xena forever fades away in the sunset
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