more sorry for taking so long again. i was wondering if u guys liked this pace or wanted to slow it down and see more of their relationship/friendship whatever?? bc ATP i think the next 1 or 2 chapters should be them confessing bc thats how i planned it lmfao soo please let me know !! itll help me figure out when i wanna post lmao
warnings down bad riki, down bad reader. both of u get a grip please.
series masterlist
March 2023
Ni-ki felt like he might be out of his depth here.
He could learn a dance in six minutes, he understood dancing. That was his element. But girls? That was another ballpark— and you, definitely, were way out of his league.
Just seeing your name on his screen— not even a text from you, just a fan’s post about you— made his mood brighter. Being in the public eye was hard, with everyone’s eyes on you at all times where it felt like you couldn’t breathe. He hated going online at all nowadays, and usually only did to see posts about you.
It was kind of cringy, kind of stalking, right? If any of his hyungs found out, they’d definitely call him a stalker. But so what if you’re the only fourth generation idol he keeps up with? So what if he follows a couple of your fan accounts on his secret Twitter account? So what if he found himself watching your content videos, even the ones with your members, when he had any free time and couldn’t get hold of you? So what if he found himself silently dying of laughter in a corner because you said something funny? He’d never tell you this, because it’d cause you to tease him endlessly and the embarrassment would eat him alive, but it was okay. Right?
He groaned quietly, burying his face in his hands.
He could lie to his members, his family, even you. But he could only to lie to himself for so long before his feelings overwhelmed him all at once.
Ni-ki would like to say the feelings just showed up, but they didn’t. It all made sense— every moment he scrambled to talk to you in his free time, every (rare) look you exchanged in the hallways when you walked past one another, every late-night conversation that lasted too long but somehow never long enough. In love songs, all he’d picture was your face. More often than not, he found himself listening to a song and thinking, “She’d like this song.” and then adding it to your playlist.
It was in the way you teased him until his face turned red, then correctly assuming he was red and teasing him even further. It was the way you effortlessly brightened his mood, how you made him feel better without him even having to say anything— it was like you could just tell when something wasn’t alright, over text messages and phone calls nonetheless. In the rare times you were at the same event, you’d give him a smile that made him feel special and seen— it was the same smile you always gave him when you greeted him on FaceTime. When you’d ramble on about something that happened earlier with the members, and you’d catch him just staring at the screen, and get all defensive, like “What?” in that indignant tone that never failed to make him smile. When it was the other way around and he caught you staring, he’d finally gain the upper hand and smirk, “Why don’t you take a screenshot, too?” When he finally brought up that you could call him by his real name, all because he wanted to hear it come from your mouth, and you smiled and repeated, “Riki,” in a soft manner that nearly sent him to the hospital. You always said his name the same way— soft and real like you weren’t just talking to the maknae of ENHYPEN, but him.
It was always there, he thinks, since the moment you met, there was a connection. It was hard to pinpoint at first since he had never felt so strongly for someone before, but when he realized it… It was impossible to ignore.
It was kind of ruining his life right now.
Instead of running through the choreography like he’d planned when he got to the company early—headphones in, water bottle in hand, ready to get in the zone—he found himself lying flat on the practice room floor, back against the cool laminate, phone inches from his face as the live video played.
You’re sitting in the middle between Jiyu and Suyi, hair pulled up in a bun with a few strands pulled in front of your face and wearing a large white hoodie. You’re holding a phone that’s not yours in your hand horizontally, eyes trained on the screen. Jiyu’s slightly behind you, with you sitting in between her legs as she plays with your stray hair strands.
“Why is Mira so flirty?” Hyeri reads from the other side of Suyi, smirking at the camera and then to you.
Your jaw drops in disbelief, and you let out a dramatic gasp, somehow nearly knocking Suyi in the head beside you, “What?! Me?” Your brows raise. “I don’t even flirt like that!”
Jiyu leans over your shoulder, grinning, “You literally flirt all the time.”
“Name one time,” you said, pointing at her like you had a case to make.
Hyeri didn’t even blink before responding, “This morning. With the barista.”
Ni-ki’s smile fades.
“That wasn’t flirting!” you laugh, eyes wide. “I was being polite!”
“With heart eyes,” Suyi adds under her breath, making everyone, including you, burst into laughter.
“But seriously,” Hyeri said, turning to the camera with a mischievous smile. “It’s not just words. She flirts with her eyes. It’s a whole thing.”
“Yeah, it’s bad,” Jiyu drags out the ‘a’ before reading out another comment. “Recommend me what to eat… Rice.”
“That’s not enough,” you roll your eyes playfully.
Ni-ki’s not listening anymore. He’s still watching, watching you smile to yourself and go back to reading comments. Usually, his heart would feel a strong sense of warmth when he looked at you. He still felt it, but it was clouded by the heavy weight on his chest.
It’s not just words. She flirts with her eyes.
He thinks of the last time you called him on FaceTime, and he was just talking and talking— which was another thing, he found it so easy to talk to you and tell you things. He didn’t know what it was, but it was nice to know there were no expectations of him from you. He was talking about everything and anything that came to mind, about Jake doing something dumb at rehearsal, how his legs hurt for no reason, how much he was craving Bungeoppang.
You were just sitting against your headboard, listening. You weren’t distracted, or doing something else while listening. You had your chin resting in your palm, hoodie sleeves pulled over your hands, eyes fixed on him like he was saying something important even when he wasn’t. You tilted your head sometimes, or nodded slightly, humming when he paused like you were making sure he knew you were still with him. He remembers trailing off at one point, realizing he was uncharacteristically rambling (and about his dog of all things), and you just smiled and asked a question about Bisco.
There were times he knew you were definitely flirting, mostly because teasing was definitely some type of love language for you, and you loved to tease him. You’d compliment him in any way you could, his hair, his outfit, his dances, and wouldn’t stop, even when he deflected. There were times he got to turn it back around on you.
But now, with the live still going on in front of him, the knot in his chest grew tighter. Was that just how you were? Had he just imagined it was special for him?
He shuts his phone off with a click, the screen going black. The silence in the practice room is suddenly suffocating. His chest felt weird—tight, something almost like embarrassment creeping up his neck.
This was stupid. He knew it was stupid.
But he really did think, just for a second… He sits up straight, pulling his hood over his head and tightening the strings.
Maybe he just needs to stop reading into things. Maybe this crush— whatever it was, he didn’t know— needs to stay where it was: unspoken, safely tucked away behind his nonchalant persona.
But he already knows it wasn’t that easy. If he kept talking to you, wouldn’t the feelings just grow stronger? He wasn’t willing to stop talking to you, and he wouldn’t.
He groaned loudly in the silence of the practice room. He is so deeply screwed.
One hand held up your chin, staring down at the empty pages in front of you. You were supposed to be helping with the lyrics for your group’s first English single—and yet, your pen hadn’t moved in over fifteen minutes.
Suyi’s voice echoed in your head from earlier: “You’re such a ditz nowadays, what’s gotten into you?”
You rolled your eyes at the memory, but… she wasn’t wrong.
You weren’t clueless, okay?
You could only deny the tornado of butterflies in your stomach for so long, could only deny the way your heart speeds up every time you see his name. You found yourself thinking about him when you weren’t distracted by your busy life, and sometimes, even then.
Maybe it was when you noticed that his playlist had become the first one you clicked to play. Or when you realized he always answered your calls, even if they were only three minutes long. Or when you stopped caring about how you looked before answering a FaceTime—because you knew he liked you best barefaced.
You knew this, of course, because of how many times he’s mentioned it.
One of the first times you didn’t wear makeup, you’d just gotten home from recording the music video of your Japanese debut song.
🥪 12:12AM
can we facetime? or are you still working?
You 12:14AM
if you dont mind me bareface lol i just got home im taking the makeup OFF!!!
🥪 12:14AM
??? idc 😭😭 even better
“Oh, God,” you muttered to yourself, smiling despite it. You continue to wipe your face off, immediately hitting accept when Ni-ki’s contact popped up.
Ni-ki was leaning back on his pillows, white hood lazily pulled over his messy hair. He smiled when he saw her, but then his eyebrows raised, “I thought you were taking your makeup off.”
“I am,” you laughed, making a small face at his words as you show him the dirty side of your makeup cleanser. “What do you mean?”
He squinted, “Damn.”
“What?” You laughed again, glancing at him as you trash the makeup remover. You were starting to feel slightly insecure at his vagueness, and you could only hope it wasn’t too bad.
“You look exactly the same without makeup,” he said, tilting his head. “Your cheeks are even still red.”
Jesus Christ. You laughed, mostly from embarrassment, fanning your face with one hand. “Um, it’s hot in here…” you mumbled, turning your fan on to prove a point.
Ni-ki didn’t say anything at first, but you could feel his gaze lingering, even through the screen. When you glanced back at him, he was just staring at you. Not in a weird way. It was a soft look, like he was holding back from saying something.
“You’re staring,” you said, voice barely above a whisper, cheeks still flushed.
He blinked, almost like he hadn’t realized, “Oh. Sorry,” he murmured, eyes flicking away for a moment—then right back. “I was just thinking that you look… really—pretty.” The last two words were forced out quickly so you wouldn’t understand, but you did.
OhMyGod— did he just—
Your brain was making you hear things, you were sure of it until his reaction. Your breath caught in your throat, almost causing you to choke on nothing, and you’re pretty sure he saw the way your eyes widened, because he immediately started laughing nervously, pulling his hood further over his face like he could hide from what he’d just said.
“I didn’t mean to say it like that!” he defended, laughing harder now. “I mean, I-I did, but like—not in a weird way!” His voice cracked on the last word, and he tightened the strings on his hoodie immediately, covering his entire face.
You didn’t think it was weird— actually, sweet. Really sweet. The Ni-ki you got to see was different than what you saw in clips on Twitter. It made you feel like this version of him— the real him, Riki, was just for you.
You couldn’t help but grin, biting your lip to keep from teasing him too hard. “You’re the weird one,” you said, cheeks warm as you looked back down at the screen, unable to keep your eyes on him or else you’ll combust. “But thanks.”
He peeked out from under his hood again, eyes looking at you warily, “Still my number one fan?”
You rolled your eyes but smiled anyway, “I plead the fifth.”
You ended up staying on FaceTime with him for over an hour, even though you both had early mornings. He talked about their new choreography for their next comeback, and you rambled about how your company was finally letting you take some creative direction in your comebacks.
That was only just the first of many, though.
Once he seemed to have gotten the first time over and done with, he seemed more comfortable to compliment you. Sometimes, he’d send fit checks and ask for one back, always calling your outfit ‘fire’ and again, saying ‘you look pretty’ like it was nothing.
Unfortunately for you and your heart, it wasn’t nothing to you.
You glare at the empty notebook and lean back in your chair, throwing your arm over your aching eyes.
You still had nothing.
Rubbing your eyes, you pull up the track demo and play it. You liked the demo, it was more your genre. It was R&B and influenced by Miami bass, and just the instrumental had your head nodding up and down along with the rhythm.
You tap your pen against the page, sighing as the beat kicks in. You figured the start of the song could be harmonizing with the slightly eerie starting instrumental and make it not sound as eerie. You hit replay and hum along as your pen slowly presses down on the paper.
You're the only one I wanna give all my time
You bite down nervously on your lip, rereading the sentence. You thought about him even when you shouldn’t, especially when something reminded you of him in public and your brain stopped working in front of fans. You found yourself staying up later than you should have, especially on nights before your busiest days— but that was all the free time you had.
There’s just something about it
Soon as we met, I couldn’t even help it
As if on cue, your phone lit up with a new notification. You glance over and see the familiar sandwich emoji, and your lips curl up without even realizing it. You grab your phone, thumb sliding on the screen before your eyes fell down to look at the three lines written on your notebook.
It was so obvious now, it almost made you laugh. When did he start slipping into your lyrics? Your thoughts? It was staring you right in the face—how could you not notice?
Im sorry to bother u but i dont get this at alllllll
How should u read it?like do i have to start from 1 which is present or the past like 2023 ones BRO IM DUMB PLS HELP
HII its okay i understand the confusion lol u can read it however way u want!! i just wanted to keep count of all the chapters which is why they have numbers but i realized i messed up!! ill fix it, but just know in the masterlist they go in chronological order with the dates too so probably that order the dates go in
more sorry for taking so longgg, hope this makes up for it !! literally 5.7k words i had to stop myself
series masterlist
February 2023
You were getting terrifyingly sneaky. If Hyeri ever found out, she’d put an Airtag on you. You were being the child your future self would worry about. You were literally every parent’s worst nightmares. And now you finally understood why Hyeri used to joke about putting you on a backpack leash.
You agreed to meet Ni-ki in front of Wanjeon Mong, the dog cafe that was around the corner from your building. He couldn’t get inside without you—thank God for the keycards—and you were already out on a late-night run to 7-Eleven two blocks away, so it just made sense. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself when you responded to him with “just meet me there lol” and sprinted down the street with way too much adrenaline for someone buying instant ramen, honey butter chips and banana milk.
Before you round the corner, you stop and catch your breath. You always stayed vigilant when you were outside, and it only tripled when it was night time and you were alone, so you know no one was following you. But you glanced around anyways, fixing your messy hair even if it was going to be covered by a hood. You wish you had put on makeup before leaving, but you had a face mask on and didn’t expect to see anyone at 7-Eleven.
When you finally reached him, he’s leaning against the brick wall of the shop next to Wanjeon Mong, baseball cap under his hood and face mask on. His hands were shoved in his hoodie’s pocket, legs stretched out in front of him as he gave the area a quick once-over. His black hoodie was a new one, you noticed, and he wore plain black sweatpants. You wonder if this was him dressing down, to stay more invisible with the shadows, and look down at yourself. For now on, you’ll always dress like you’re about to get put on the news whenever you leave the house.
Your pace slowed down, not wanting to seem too eager. You were suddenly aware of every movement you made, every expression you made. You could see his head turn your way, dark eyes meeting yours before he glanced away. You smile freely underneath your face mask, knowing he wouldn’t be able to see it.
“Hey,” you said, forcing your voice to not tremble. You internally pat yourself on the back for not stuttering. “Did you have to wait long?”
Ni-ki shook his head, eyes crinkling slightly above his mask, “Hey. No, you must’ve been already done shopping, huh?” He glanced at the plastic bag in your hand.
Sure, let’s go with that.
You shrugged, lifting the bag up as if to show off, “They’re essential to me not losing my mind. Didn’t realize I’d be taking you home, too, otherwise I would’ve gotten a bigger bag.” You don’t realize how weird it sounds until the words leave your mouth, making a face at yourself before you can stop yourself.
Ni-ki laughed quietly, glancing around again before saying, “I’m light on my feet, I’m stealthy like that.”
You giggled, grateful he didn’t seem to think of your phrasing, “You are so unserious.”
“And yet, you keep me around,” Ni-ki said, and you can tell he’s still smiling. “What does that say about you, huh?”
“That I have bad judgement,” you replied dryly, already walking ahead to avoid letting him see the smile threatening your face. “And you’re my entertainment.”
Ni-ki easily caught up to you, matching your pace as the two of you turned the corner toward your building. “Entertainment?” he repeated, pretending to be offended. “So I’m like… what? Your personal court jester now?”
You didn’t even know he knew what that was. You hummed, tilting your head thoughtfully, “Exactly. Ooh, do a trick!”
He snorted, shaking his head, “Unbelievable.”
“You’re a terrible court jester,” you pout, even though he couldn’t see it, patting him playfully on the arm, “You’re lucky you’re cute and can dance. Oh, how about you dance for me instead?”
Ni-ki faltered mid-step as you continued on. You noticed he stopped, and turn to look at him with your eyebrows raised. He started walking again, his hand came up to adjust the brim of his cap, and dark eyes darting ahead like he suddenly had to focus really hard on walking in a straight line. “Ha,” he muttered after a second, voice quieter this time, “I knew you only liked me for my looks and talent.”
You shook your head, biting back another smile as you pulled your hoodie further down over your forehead and scanned the empty sidewalk. The air was cool against your cheeks, your heart pounding with the adrenaline and thrill of doing something you weren’t supposed to—but it was also something that felt weirdly normal. Comfortable, like this was something you did all the time.
By the time you reached the entrance of your building, looking around to make sure no one was lurking to catch you, Ni-ki was right beside you again, hands in his pockets. “You sure about this?” he whispered, not teasing this time, but reassuring.
You met his eyes for a second, the weight of the moment settling between you. You nodded, grabbing your keycard from your sweats pocket, “Yeah,” you turn around abruptly, facing him directly with only some inches between you two. Your breath hitched, you didn’t expect him to be so close, “J-just, uh, once we get there,” you gain your composure back, but don’t make any steps back or forward, “—no noises, and follow my steps exactly. Or else I’m dead and you mysteriously vanish.”
His head tilted, nodding once, eyes crinkling again, “Copy that, boss.”
You scanned your keycard, glancing behind you once more before pushing open the door. The soft beep and click from the security system was loud, making you wince but you slipped inside quickly. Ni-ki followed closely behind, practically on your heels, and the door shut silently behind you two.
You and Ni-ki exchanged a look that said: Success so far.
The lobby was empty and only the light above the elevator was on. At this hour, staff had gone home, including all security. Your building wasn’t one that had twenty four seven staff members, something you hated before but at this moment, it was something you were thankful for.
“Come on,” you muttered, nudging Ni-ki, starting to walk forward. You avoid the sitting area of the lobby full of couches and tables, but almost run into the tall sign that indicated where the downstairs kitchen was. You pretend like you didn’t, hoping Ni-ki didn’t see that and tug him out of the way slightly. “Straight ahead is the elevator. If someone comes out, you live here. Somewhere else— not with me.”
He snickered softly, leaning in so you could hear him as he followed you to the elevator, “I’m just your cousin visiting from Japan.”
You snorted—too loud—then immediately slapped a hand over your mouth as your eyes went wide. Ni-ki was trying not to laugh, his shoulders shaking with effort. “Don’t make me regret this,” you whispered harshly, but the way your eyes crinkled made him suspect you were smiling.
You pressed the elevator button with your sleeve-covered hand, tapping your foot anxiously. The longer you weren’t in your dorm, the more likely you were to get caught by someone you wouldn’t be able to convince not to go to the media. The quiet hum of the building felt louder in the stillness. You were beginning to get paranoid, even though you knew no one could see you now.
The elevator dinged, and the doors slid open with a soft whoosh. Ni-ki stepped in first, leaning on the elevator wall facing the doors and slipping his hands deeper into his pockets like he belonged here. You forced yourself to look away and followed his steps, tapping your keycard against the sensor to activate the elevator panel. A green light blinked, and you pressed the eleventh floor.
The doors closed, and the elevator hummed as it ascended. You leaned against the right wall, stealing glances at each other but not saying much. There was a sort of tension surrounding you two, and you wondered if it was because you were stuck in an enclosed space, alone with him. Totally not terrifying.
“The elevator ever break and you have to walk eleven floors up with groceries?” Ni-ki broke the silence, keeping his eyes on you.
You laughed lightly, tension easing, “Once. The next time, we paid the security guards to take them up there for us.”
“Work smarter, not harder,” he chuckled.
You grinned, “I’m too pretty to be doing manual labor, anyway.”
The elevator dinged softly, and the doors slid open onto the quiet hallway of your floor. You stepped out first, glancing both ways to make sure it was empty before gesturing for Ni-ki to follow.
“This is where it gets hard,” you whispered, cautious of alerting your few neighbors as you went right and pointing down the hallway. The lights were dim, as well, but all of them were still on. “We don’t have many neighbors, so everyone knows everyone.” You pointed at a door to your left that had the numbers ‘1106’ on it in bold lettering, “That’s ajumeoni, she’s a nurse and works night shifts so we’re always quiet during the day. No one lives there or there…”
You slowed down as you two approached your door, putting your finger up to your mouth and gesturing for him to wait. The doorbell camera flashed green at you, alerting you that it senses you. You slid your keycard in and turned the handle, quickly backing up to cover the camera with the back of your hoodie. Ni-ki took the hint and slipped into your dorm first, taking his shoes off but held them in his hands instead of putting them down where your members shoes were near the entrance.
You slipped in right behind him, shutting the door with a soft click and flipping the lock as fast as you could without making it obvious you were panicking. Your back pressed against the door for a moment, and you held your breath, listening.
Silence.
No footsteps, no floorboards creaking. No doors creaking open. No call of your first name.
You slowly exhaled, feeling your heart rate calm down. You were almost done. Okay, next destination was your room, which was a bit harder. You’d have to hope that the others were asleep or didn’t care to check if they heard footsteps. Now that you were behind your locked door, you were free to tug off your face mask. You can feel Ni-ki’s eyes on you, and you can feel your cheeks start to heat up in response. He took off his own mask, but you stubbornly don’t meet his eyes and glance around, taking your shoes off at the same time.
The lights in the kitchen and living room were off, the only thing lighting up the hallway was the night light you insisted on putting in there after tripping too many times over nothing or bumping into a wall. The ceiling fan in the living room hummed faintly, blades whirling around at the fastest pace.
You gestured with your head for him to follow you, pointing at the floor and your feet. He nodded, understanding and the two of you padded down the hallway like a pair of spies in an action movie. You held the snack bag to your chest, leading him past the living room like any step could trigger alarms and lasers. Your socks made the lightest shuffle sounds against the hardwood floor.
Ni-ki nearly bumped into you when you suddenly paused at the hallway corner, your hand flying up instinctively to press against his chest and hold him back.
He blinked down at you, glancing down at your hand. He hoped you couldn’t feel his heartbeat, because it was going crazy. You pointed to a door, the light flooding from the crack under the closed door.
Both of you are slower and quieter as you pass by the bathroom door, stopping in front of your own door. A small whiteboard hung from the middle of the white door, different colors of markers lined up at the bottom of the board.
At the top, in big pink bubble letters, someone had written “Y/N’S LAIR.” Underneath, scrawled in different colored handwriting, were random notes:
I cleaned up your room, you’re welcome.
Next time you don’t clean the dishes, I’m making you take out the trash instead.
WARNING: this bitch bites!!! especially if woken up before noon on our days off
He has to hold back a laugh at the last one, smiling to himself as you quietly twist your doorknob, letting him in. You locked it behind you with a soft click.
Ni-ki took a slow look around your room—it wasn’t big, but not too small where you couldn’t have a desk and vanity. It was comfortable, lit only by the flower lamp on your bedside table next to your bed and the LED lights stuck to your headboard. Some polaroids were pinned above your desk on a cork board, an open notebook with a pen lying next to it on your desk. Posters lined up on the rest of your walls, he could see a SHINee one, and SNSD and Red Velvet. He squinted a bit to see the biggest poster, finally recognizing it as a poster of all the members of NCT. You were a SM fan, he clearly understood. Your laptop was open on your bed but asleep, surrounded by multiple plushies and pillows. Your sheets were white with a large white and purple blanket crumpled at the bottom of your bed. A song he recognized from wave to earth softly hummed from your Bluetooth speaker, the loudest thing in your room. He could faintly smell some sort of mixture of floral and fruity scent, and his eyes dropped to an unlit pink candle on your bedside table.
You dropped the 7-Eleven bag on your bed next to the plushies and let out a deep breath, finally relaxing now that you were in the clear. “See? Smooth,” you say at a normal voice as you tug off your hoodie completely, leaving you in your Jujutsu Kaisen graphic tee.
Ni-ki nodded, pulling his hood down and taking off his cap and mask. His hair was a little flattened, but you kind of liked it. “I’m impressed,” he said softly. “You’ve done this before?”
You gave him a look, flopping onto your back on your bed, “Do I look like I have a death wish?”
He grinned, tossing his hat down gently on your desk and sitting down on the pink, fluffy stool. You stifled a smile, he looked funny. And cute. “No. But you do seem a little reckless.” His eyes are still roaming around your space, catching glimpses of your life in the pictures of you and your friends. “I’m really the first person you’ve snuck in here, huh? I feel honored. Truly.”
You shot him another look, sitting up again and tucking your legs beneath you. “Don’t get cocky. You’re still on thin ice.”
“I haven’t even done anything yet,” he said with a grin, though there was a slight flush to his ears now that the tension was settling and you were really just... here. Together. In your room. Alone. And your members didn’t have a clue in the world you had let a teenage boy in your ‘lair’ as they so affectionately call it. His members didn’t know, he probably told them something about practicing more. It was totally something you’d read in a book.
“Not dancing for me is the number one offense,” you nodded, face serious. “Thin ice, buddy.”
Ni-ki raised his hands in mock surrender, a teasing spark in his eyes. “Okay, okay. I’ll bust out the moves if it means I get to stay.”
You squinted at him, trying to keep your expression stern, “You think this is a joke, Icky Boy?”
“No, no,” he shook his head, but his lips twitching up betrayed him, “Of course not. Nothing funny about sneaking a boy in your room—“ your eyes narrowed at him and he grinned, no longer hiding it, “— Don’t I look funny sitting in your room surrounded by pastel colors and— and plushies?”
You gasped, grabbing the closest plushie from him before he could touch it and clutching it to your chest dramatically, “Don’t make fun of my plushies! Niles is very sensitive, and he’s worth more than your shoes, actually.”
“Which pair?” He teased.
You stuck your tongue out at him, but your smile was hard to hide. The tension from sneaking around was melting away, leaving behind something lighter, easier to breathe in. The song had switched from wave to earth and was now playing an EXO song. You turned up the volume on your speaker, not enough to make one of the members knock on your door to tell you to turn it down, but loud to where they wouldn’t be able to hear anything but the music. You reached into the plastic bag and tossed him the chips without even asking, and he caught it with a lazy ease that made you roll your eyes.
“Hater,” he shot at you, pulling open the bag of chips.
“I’m your number one hater,” you nodded in agreement, eyeing him to see what else you could complain about. You watch him pull a chip out of the bag with his left hand, offering it to you first. Your cheeks heat up, but you ignore it and instead ask, “You’re left-handed? Ew.”
“Ew?” he repeated in disbelief, blinking at you. “… Seriously?”
“You’re so weird,” you scrunched your nose up playfully at him, “Weirdo. I knew there had to be something wrong with you.”
“Oh no,” he groaned slightly, putting the chip in his mouth. “You’re one of those people.”
“Yeah,” you nodded, lifting up your right hand and waving it around it, “Right-handed supremacy.”
“Discriminating against left-handed people?” Ni-ki teased, leaning back in your desk chair, “Oh no, I wonder what the Internet would have to say about that. You’re going to get cancelled.”
“Only if you tell,” you smiled, resting your head on your hand, “And if you do, I’ll fight you.”
He raised an eyebrow, “Fight me?” He glanced over you, “You?”
“I could take you,” you scoffed, leaning up to sit upright. He followed your movements, sitting straight in the chair.
“With those tiny fists?” Ni-ki laughed, “Yeah, right. Doubt it.”
“My hands aren’t tiny!” You protested, putting Niles aside like you were actually getting ready to throw hands, “Yours are just excessively large for someone your age. And you underestimate me! I have the element of surprise,” you list off, putting one and then two fingers up, “And I am full of rage that’s been begging to be let out.”
Ni-ki laughed again, tilting his head as he looked at you. “Oh, you’re one of those girls. Small, angry, and delusional.”
You gasped. “Delusional?! You know what? Let’s settle this right now.”
“Yeah?” He leaned forward a little, elbows resting on his knees, gaze flicking over your face with something teasing but curious beneath it. “How?”
You held up your right hand, wrist limp like you were about to slap him, but then closed your fingers and stuck your thumb up, “Thumb war.”
Ni-ki snickered, scooting forward with the chair to reach you without having to lean far, “You’re going down.”
“No mercy,” you warned, locking your fingers with his dramatically. “Three, two, one— go!”
Your thumbs immediately began battling like your life depended on it. You lunged first, but he dodged easily, eyebrows lifting in mock surprise. “Wow,” he said, trying not to laugh. “You really came at me.”
“I told you I’m full of rage,” you huffed, concentrating. “Years of unprocessed anger and being wronged by the girls. This is personal.”
He was laughing now, trying to fight back without crushing your hand, “Sister trauma, huh? I can relate.”
You grin a little at the thought of your members being considered your sisters, but don’t get easily distracted, pinning his thumb down for half a second. You go to cheer quietly, but he wiggled free and laughed, “You thought!”
“Cheater,” you hissed, both of you now holding hands in the weirdest, most competitive grip possible.
“Sore loser,” he grunted lightly, thumb slipping over yours and holding it down, grinning. “Got you.”
“Cheater,” you insisted, pulling your hand back like you’d just been burnt.
Ni-ki shook his head, that annoying proud smile on his face, “Loser.”
“You’re so annoying,” you muttered, shaking out your hand like the loss physically wounded you. But before you could fully retreat, he caught your wrist gently, fingers wrapping around it without thinking. You paused. He wasn’t even gripping tightly, just… holding it. His hand creeped up, lining up with your hand now. And now your hands were back in the space between you, palms facing, fingers still close.
Your eyes darted down. You could feel your hand shaking lightly, even as you pressed your palm to his slowly, lining your fingers up together. His hand easily eclipsed yours, fingers longer, slightly calloused from dance practice, warm even through the gentle pressure.
“Tiny hands,” Ni-ki said quietly, nodding like it confirmed it for him. Neither of you moved away. You could feel the warmth of his skin, the way his fingertips passed yours slightly. His thumb brushed yours once, like it was testing something, and then decided, resting against yours. His pinky curled slightly around yours.
You glanced at him, “Yup. You’re an alien.”
He looked away from your hands, “And you’re a dwarf. What else is new?”
The two of you back away at the same time, letting your hands fall to your sides. He broke eye contact first, clearing his throat and looking at your cork board. “Which one’s your favorite?”
You follow his gaze to the polaroids, all displaying you with different members, even other idols, some he recognized to be IVE and NewJeans members, but none of people who looked like you. “What, picture?”
“Yeah.”
You hummed, putting your finger on your chin as you looked at them all and thought about it, finally pointing at the one in the top right corner, “Probably that one.” The polaroid is old, you can tell by how it’s faded. A younger version of you and Hyeri are in the picture, your mouth full of red velvet cake and the same cake smeared all over Hyeri’s face, mouth caught open in mid-scream. You smiled. “It’s from before we even debuted, back in 2019. It was Suyi’s birthday, and Jiyu dared her to shove some of the cake in Hyeri’s face. I laughed so hard I choked. But so worth it for her reaction.”
He grinned, turning back toward you, “You look happy in it.”
You paused, smile dimming just slightly. “I was,” you said quietly, almost surprised at yourself for being that honest.
He nodded, gaze drifting back up to the cork board. He kept looking, his expression was hard to read now—not blank, not overly focused, just… thoughtful. You watched him for a second too long, the silence stretching in a way that made your chest tighten a little. You could only imagine what he was thinking. Had he noticed that the only people who were frequently on the board were your members and a couple of other idols you were close to?
Ni-ki spoke up before you could, “You miss being a normal person?”
You blinked, caught off guard from the question, “What?”
He glanced over at you, almost sheepish, like maybe he hadn’t meant to say it out loud, but continued on anyway, “I mean—like, before all this. The training, the fans, the cameras… when things were simpler.”
You hesitated, looking down at your blanket. Your first instinct was to laugh it off, saying something cringey like “No, I wouldn’t change it for the world.” But that wasn’t the truth. You looked back up, not exactly looking him in the eye but saying, “Yeah, sometimes.”
Sometimes, when you watch the other members go home to their families during the holidays, or see their parents cheering them on at concerts, you feel it. That ache. You’re not even sure what exactly it is you miss—it’s not like your life before all this was picture-perfect. But maybe it’s the idea of what you could’ve had— the version of family you built in your head never really matched the one you came from.
Ni-ki nodded slowly, gaze returning to the cork board, “You have a lot of pictures with your members.”
You followed his gaze, nodding, “Yep. They’re basically all I’ve got, they’re in every memory I have.” The words came out before you could stop yourself— your tone was too quick, too flat. It was noticeable that something was off. You regretted them the second they left your mouth.
But Ni-ki didn’t flinch, just asked, “Your family doesn’t like taking pictures?”
You shook your head, a small breath escaping as you sank back into your pillows, “There’s not much to put up.” Not ones that didn’t want to make you tear it up and cry and scream. You glanced at him, contemplating with yourself if you should continue before slowly saying, “I… They’re just not really my family anymore.”
Ni-ki’s eyes softened, and he gave a slow, understanding nod, that filled you with relief, “I get it. Sometimes family isn’t just who we’re blood related to—it’s the ones that choose you and you choose back.” He shifted slightly, offering a small, reassuring smile.
You smiled back, but couldn’t handle keeping eye contact with him any longer than for a few seconds and you looked away, “Exactly.” You glanced back at him before looking away again, “Are you close with your members? I know you guys came from a survival show, and that couldn’t have been easy, you know, being competition and all that before.”
Ni-ki shifted in his seat, understanding you wanted a topic change, and rubbed the back of his neck thoughtfully as he looked down, “Yeah, we’re close. I mean, it was kind of weird once you thought about it. It was supposed to be every man for himself one day, and then the next, you’re supposed to be a team who works together well. But I was already close with some of the members like Jay, so it wasn’t too bad. I missed the other trainees, my friends, and it would be hard sometimes for all of us to work together, especially once we started living together properly without cameras on us twenty four seven.” You frowned. “But… I think it was the best outcome,” he nodded, looking up at you, “I couldn’t imagine not debuting with the six of them, I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.”
You smiled softly, chin resting in your hand as you now lay on your stomach, “That’s so cute. I love a good feel good story. A real coming-of-age Netflix original.”
Ni-ki laughed, a full belly laugh that made your smile turn into a grin and you had to look away, feeling warm all over. You didn’t even realize it, but the playlist was back to wave to earth again. You easily recognized it at the start of ‘love’, feeling heat travel to your cheeks. Jesus Christ, you want to somehow throttle the shuffle feature so bad right now.
Ni-ki seemed to notice the sudden shift in your energy, his laugh tapering off as he tilted his head at you with a small, teasing smile. “What?” he asked, voice quieter now, like he knew something had changed but didn’t want to call it out too loud.
You shook your head quickly, playing it off, “Nothing. Stupid song shuffle.”
His eyes lit with quiet amusement, “Wave to earth again?”
You groaned, bringing a penguin plushie to your face, “I swear, it’s not on purpose.”
He chuckled softly, and you heard the stool creak as he leaned forward a little. “You’ve got good music taste, I’ll give you that. But it could be a little better.”
You lower the plushie, raising your eyebrows at him, “Oh, yeah?” You push yourself up in your elbows, “Are you gonna give me recommendations?”
Ni-ki smirked like he’d been waiting for you to ask, bringing his phone out of his pocket. “Obviously,” he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world, “Consider this a public service.”
You squinted at him playfully, “You better not say something basic like your own songs.”
“Our songs aren’t basic,” he pointed at you, unlocking his phone with his other hand, “And they are great, so I am going to.“
You raised your eyebrows, “Spare me. I’ve already listened to them all.”
Ni-ki’s head lifted from looking at his phone, his own brows raising as a smirk appeared, “Oh, yeah?”
You rolled your eyes, flopping back dramatically onto your pillows, “Don’t let it get to your head.”
Ni-ki grinned, clearly enjoying himself and the new information he now had, “Too late. You’re my fan.”
You grabbed a pillow this time and chucked it at him—he dodged effortlessly, laughing as it hit the floor behind him. “I’m not your fan,” you argued, “There’s six other people participating in the songs, you know?”
“But you listen to my music, and I’m your bias because you know me best,” he winked, nodding to himself as he went back to his phone. “No need to lie.” The song changed, and Ni-ki immediately recognized it was Polaroid Love. His grin was immediate, head shooting up to look at you, who was already covering your face with your hands.
The shuffle was seriously out to get you.
Ni-ki nearly doubled over laughing, phone still in hand, “No way.”
You groaned into your palms, “I’m actually going to delete this app.”
“The universe is on my side! Let’s go!” He cackled, kicking his legs a little where he sat, full-on entertained now.
“I hate you,” you huffed, “It went viral, how could I not have it on my playlist?”
“Do you have more songs? Let me see your playlist!” Ni-ki looked a bit crazy now as he lunged for your laptop and you squealed, trying to snatch it away from him and prevent him from landing on you at the same time. He managed to not crush you and landed on his side right next to you, arms stretching over your head.
“No! Go away,” you laughed, grabbing your laptop and putting it on the other side of your bed. “My playlists are private.”
“And here I was, willing to share my playlists with you,” Ni-ki scoffed, “Even willing to make you your own playlist. Crazy.”
So annoying— wait. Hold on a second. He was going to make a playlist just for you to listen to? You don’t ever remember discussing playlists with him, nevermind the fact that you’ve always wanted someone to make you a playlist. It was something you read about in a romance book once, and it struck something within you.
You lifted your head up, eyes narrowing at him, “Hey. My own playlist? Huh—“
Ni-ki raised an eyebrow at your soft tone but didn’t back down, just smirked, clearly enjoying your reaction. “Yeah. Personalized. Created by me. With love and care,” he said dramatically, like he was trying to convince you to buy a scam product.
“Who says I’ll even like these songs?” You asked, feeling your heart beat erratically in your chest. You flop onto your back, no longer so close to him. He only copied your movements, laying on his back next to you.
“Me,” he scoffed, going back to his phone where the Melon app was pulled up. “You want it or not?” He glanced over at you, face softening like he was checking if you genuinely wanted it or not— like he was afraid you’d say no. He was crazy, you decided.
“Shut up,” your voice is muffled into the Hello Kitty plushie you’re holding up to your face. “Send me the damn link already.”
He grinned, “Knew it.”
“You’re so full of yourself,” you groaned, but you couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face. You were just glad he couldn’t see it.
Ni-ki turned his head to look at you, the plushie still blocking your face from his view. He smiled to himself, looking back at his phone and created the playlist, titling it, ‘for my #1 fan’ and laughed at himself out loud.
You brought the plushie down, looking at him curiously, “What?”
“Nothing,” he snickered, the grin on his face giving him away, “Hold on, keep the plushie away from your face—“
You narrowed your eyes, “Why?”
“Because I want to see your face when you get this,” he murmured, tapping on his phone a few times with suspicious glee.
Your phone buzzed with the notification a moment later. You glanced down, unlocking your phone and clicking on the text and the link. You stared at your screen for a moment before looking back up at him slowly.
“… For my number one fan?” you read out loud, deadpan. “Seriously?”
He laughed, “I’m going to start a rumor that I’m your bias,” he paused, “Oh, wait… It’s not a rumor if it’s true, huh?”
You stared at him in disbelief before taking the Hello Kitty plushie and aim to smack him with it, “I hate you.”
Ni-ki just laughed, catching the pillow mid-swing this time, “You wanted this, remember?”
You paused, the plushie still in your hands, your scowl melting into something softer, dangerously close to fond. The playlist was still open on your screen, the title teasing you in bold letters. You let out a quiet breath, letting the plushie drop back onto your chest as you turned your head to look at him. His smile hadn’t faded, still smug and boyish, like he knew exactly what he was doing. “Whatever,” you rolled your eyes, forcing yourself to stop looking at him for too long, “I expect top notch songs.”
“Only the best for the best,” Ni-ki laughed, going back to add songs.
Your face heated up for the nth time that night, bringing the plushie back to your face and cuddling into it, nearly restricting your breath.
He was going to be the death of you if you didn’t do something to stop it.
more sorry for taking so longgg, hope this makes up for it !! literally 5.7k words i had to stop myself
series masterlist
February 2023
You were getting terrifyingly sneaky. If Hyeri ever found out, she’d put an Airtag on you. You were being the child your future self would worry about. You were literally every parent’s worst nightmares. And now you finally understood why Hyeri used to joke about putting you on a backpack leash.
You agreed to meet Ni-ki in front of Wanjeon Mong, the dog cafe that was around the corner from your building. He couldn’t get inside without you—thank God for the keycards—and you were already out on a late-night run to 7-Eleven two blocks away, so it just made sense. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself when you responded to him with “just meet me there lol” and sprinted down the street with way too much adrenaline for someone buying instant ramen, honey butter chips and banana milk.
Before you round the corner, you stop and catch your breath. You always stayed vigilant when you were outside, and it only tripled when it was night time and you were alone, so you know no one was following you. But you glanced around anyways, fixing your messy hair even if it was going to be covered by a hood. You wish you had put on makeup before leaving, but you had a face mask on and didn’t expect to see anyone at 7-Eleven.
When you finally reached him, he’s leaning against the brick wall of the shop next to Wanjeon Mong, baseball cap under his hood and face mask on. His hands were shoved in his hoodie’s pocket, legs stretched out in front of him as he gave the area a quick once-over. His black hoodie was a new one, you noticed, and he wore plain black sweatpants. You wonder if this was him dressing down, to stay more invisible with the shadows, and look down at yourself. For now on, you’ll always dress like you’re about to get put on the news whenever you leave the house.
Your pace slowed down, not wanting to seem too eager. You were suddenly aware of every movement you made, every expression you made. You could see his head turn your way, dark eyes meeting yours before he glanced away. You smile freely underneath your face mask, knowing he wouldn’t be able to see it.
“Hey,” you said, forcing your voice to not tremble. You internally pat yourself on the back for not stuttering. “Did you have to wait long?”
Ni-ki shook his head, eyes crinkling slightly above his mask, “Hey. No, you must’ve been already done shopping, huh?” He glanced at the plastic bag in your hand.
Sure, let’s go with that.
You shrugged, lifting the bag up as if to show off, “They’re essential to me not losing my mind. Didn’t realize I’d be taking you home, too, otherwise I would’ve gotten a bigger bag.” You don’t realize how weird it sounds until the words leave your mouth, making a face at yourself before you can stop yourself.
Ni-ki laughed quietly, glancing around again before saying, “I’m light on my feet, I’m stealthy like that.”
You giggled, grateful he didn’t seem to think of your phrasing, “You are so unserious.”
“And yet, you keep me around,” Ni-ki said, and you can tell he’s still smiling. “What does that say about you, huh?”
“That I have bad judgement,” you replied dryly, already walking ahead to avoid letting him see the smile threatening your face. “And you’re my entertainment.”
Ni-ki easily caught up to you, matching your pace as the two of you turned the corner toward your building. “Entertainment?” he repeated, pretending to be offended. “So I’m like… what? Your personal court jester now?”
You didn’t even know he knew what that was. You hummed, tilting your head thoughtfully, “Exactly. Ooh, do a trick!”
He snorted, shaking his head, “Unbelievable.”
“You’re a terrible court jester,” you pout, even though he couldn’t see it, patting him playfully on the arm, “You’re lucky you’re cute and can dance. Oh, how about you dance for me instead?”
Ni-ki faltered mid-step as you continued on. You noticed he stopped, and turn to look at him with your eyebrows raised. He started walking again, his hand came up to adjust the brim of his cap, and dark eyes darting ahead like he suddenly had to focus really hard on walking in a straight line. “Ha,” he muttered after a second, voice quieter this time, “I knew you only liked me for my looks and talent.”
You shook your head, biting back another smile as you pulled your hoodie further down over your forehead and scanned the empty sidewalk. The air was cool against your cheeks, your heart pounding with the adrenaline and thrill of doing something you weren’t supposed to—but it was also something that felt weirdly normal. Comfortable, like this was something you did all the time.
By the time you reached the entrance of your building, looking around to make sure no one was lurking to catch you, Ni-ki was right beside you again, hands in his pockets. “You sure about this?” he whispered, not teasing this time, but reassuring.
You met his eyes for a second, the weight of the moment settling between you. You nodded, grabbing your keycard from your sweats pocket, “Yeah,” you turn around abruptly, facing him directly with only some inches between you two. Your breath hitched, you didn’t expect him to be so close, “J-just, uh, once we get there,” you gain your composure back, but don’t make any steps back or forward, “—no noises, and follow my steps exactly. Or else I’m dead and you mysteriously vanish.”
His head tilted, nodding once, eyes crinkling again, “Copy that, boss.”
You scanned your keycard, glancing behind you once more before pushing open the door. The soft beep and click from the security system was loud, making you wince but you slipped inside quickly. Ni-ki followed closely behind, practically on your heels, and the door shut silently behind you two.
You and Ni-ki exchanged a look that said: Success so far.
The lobby was empty and only the light above the elevator was on. At this hour, staff had gone home, including all security. Your building wasn’t one that had twenty four seven staff members, something you hated before but at this moment, it was something you were thankful for.
“Come on,” you muttered, nudging Ni-ki, starting to walk forward. You avoid the sitting area of the lobby full of couches and tables, but almost run into the tall sign that indicated where the downstairs kitchen was. You pretend like you didn’t, hoping Ni-ki didn’t see that and tug him out of the way slightly. “Straight ahead is the elevator. If someone comes out, you live here. Somewhere else— not with me.”
He snickered softly, leaning in so you could hear him as he followed you to the elevator, “I’m just your cousin visiting from Japan.”
You snorted—too loud—then immediately slapped a hand over your mouth as your eyes went wide. Ni-ki was trying not to laugh, his shoulders shaking with effort. “Don’t make me regret this,” you whispered harshly, but the way your eyes crinkled made him suspect you were smiling.
You pressed the elevator button with your sleeve-covered hand, tapping your foot anxiously. The longer you weren’t in your dorm, the more likely you were to get caught by someone you wouldn’t be able to convince not to go to the media. The quiet hum of the building felt louder in the stillness. You were beginning to get paranoid, even though you knew no one could see you now.
The elevator dinged, and the doors slid open with a soft whoosh. Ni-ki stepped in first, leaning on the elevator wall facing the doors and slipping his hands deeper into his pockets like he belonged here. You forced yourself to look away and followed his steps, tapping your keycard against the sensor to activate the elevator panel. A green light blinked, and you pressed the eleventh floor.
The doors closed, and the elevator hummed as it ascended. You leaned against the right wall, stealing glances at each other but not saying much. There was a sort of tension surrounding you two, and you wondered if it was because you were stuck in an enclosed space, alone with him. Totally not terrifying.
“The elevator ever break and you have to walk eleven floors up with groceries?” Ni-ki broke the silence, keeping his eyes on you.
You laughed lightly, tension easing, “Once. The next time, we paid the security guards to take them up there for us.”
“Work smarter, not harder,” he chuckled.
You grinned, “I’m too pretty to be doing manual labor, anyway.”
The elevator dinged softly, and the doors slid open onto the quiet hallway of your floor. You stepped out first, glancing both ways to make sure it was empty before gesturing for Ni-ki to follow.
“This is where it gets hard,” you whispered, cautious of alerting your few neighbors as you went right and pointing down the hallway. The lights were dim, as well, but all of them were still on. “We don’t have many neighbors, so everyone knows everyone.” You pointed at a door to your left that had the numbers ‘1106’ on it in bold lettering, “That’s ajumeoni, she’s a nurse and works night shifts so we’re always quiet during the day. No one lives there or there…”
You slowed down as you two approached your door, putting your finger up to your mouth and gesturing for him to wait. The doorbell camera flashed green at you, alerting you that it senses you. You slid your keycard in and turned the handle, quickly backing up to cover the camera with the back of your hoodie. Ni-ki took the hint and slipped into your dorm first, taking his shoes off but held them in his hands instead of putting them down where your members shoes were near the entrance.
You slipped in right behind him, shutting the door with a soft click and flipping the lock as fast as you could without making it obvious you were panicking. Your back pressed against the door for a moment, and you held your breath, listening.
Silence.
No footsteps, no floorboards creaking. No doors creaking open. No call of your first name.
You slowly exhaled, feeling your heart rate calm down. You were almost done. Okay, next destination was your room, which was a bit harder. You’d have to hope that the others were asleep or didn’t care to check if they heard footsteps. Now that you were behind your locked door, you were free to tug off your face mask. You can feel Ni-ki’s eyes on you, and you can feel your cheeks start to heat up in response. He took off his own mask, but you stubbornly don’t meet his eyes and glance around, taking your shoes off at the same time.
The lights in the kitchen and living room were off, the only thing lighting up the hallway was the night light you insisted on putting in there after tripping too many times over nothing or bumping into a wall. The ceiling fan in the living room hummed faintly, blades whirling around at the fastest pace.
You gestured with your head for him to follow you, pointing at the floor and your feet. He nodded, understanding and the two of you padded down the hallway like a pair of spies in an action movie. You held the snack bag to your chest, leading him past the living room like any step could trigger alarms and lasers. Your socks made the lightest shuffle sounds against the hardwood floor.
Ni-ki nearly bumped into you when you suddenly paused at the hallway corner, your hand flying up instinctively to press against his chest and hold him back.
He blinked down at you, glancing down at your hand. He hoped you couldn’t feel his heartbeat, because it was going crazy. You pointed to a door, the light flooding from the crack under the closed door.
Both of you are slower and quieter as you pass by the bathroom door, stopping in front of your own door. A small whiteboard hung from the middle of the white door, different colors of markers lined up at the bottom of the board.
At the top, in big pink bubble letters, someone had written “Y/N’S LAIR.” Underneath, scrawled in different colored handwriting, were random notes:
I cleaned up your room, you’re welcome.
Next time you don’t clean the dishes, I’m making you take out the trash instead.
WARNING: this bitch bites!!! especially if woken up before noon on our days off
He has to hold back a laugh at the last one, smiling to himself as you quietly twist your doorknob, letting him in. You locked it behind you with a soft click.
Ni-ki took a slow look around your room—it wasn’t big, but not too small where you couldn’t have a desk and vanity. It was comfortable, lit only by the flower lamp on your bedside table next to your bed and the LED lights stuck to your headboard. Some polaroids were pinned above your desk on a cork board, an open notebook with a pen lying next to it on your desk. Posters lined up on the rest of your walls, he could see a SHINee one, and SNSD and Red Velvet. He squinted a bit to see the biggest poster, finally recognizing it as a poster of all the members of NCT. You were a SM fan, he clearly understood. Your laptop was open on your bed but asleep, surrounded by multiple plushies and pillows. Your sheets were white with a large white and purple blanket crumpled at the bottom of your bed. A song he recognized from wave to earth softly hummed from your Bluetooth speaker, the loudest thing in your room. He could faintly smell some sort of mixture of floral and fruity scent, and his eyes dropped to an unlit pink candle on your bedside table.
You dropped the 7-Eleven bag on your bed next to the plushies and let out a deep breath, finally relaxing now that you were in the clear. “See? Smooth,” you say at a normal voice as you tug off your hoodie completely, leaving you in your Jujutsu Kaisen graphic tee.
Ni-ki nodded, pulling his hood down and taking off his cap and mask. His hair was a little flattened, but you kind of liked it. “I’m impressed,” he said softly. “You’ve done this before?”
You gave him a look, flopping onto your back on your bed, “Do I look like I have a death wish?”
He grinned, tossing his hat down gently on your desk and sitting down on the pink, fluffy stool. You stifled a smile, he looked funny. And cute. “No. But you do seem a little reckless.” His eyes are still roaming around your space, catching glimpses of your life in the pictures of you and your friends. “I’m really the first person you’ve snuck in here, huh? I feel honored. Truly.”
You shot him another look, sitting up again and tucking your legs beneath you. “Don’t get cocky. You’re still on thin ice.”
“I haven’t even done anything yet,” he said with a grin, though there was a slight flush to his ears now that the tension was settling and you were really just... here. Together. In your room. Alone. And your members didn’t have a clue in the world you had let a teenage boy in your ‘lair’ as they so affectionately call it. His members didn’t know, he probably told them something about practicing more. It was totally something you’d read in a book.
“Not dancing for me is the number one offense,” you nodded, face serious. “Thin ice, buddy.”
Ni-ki raised his hands in mock surrender, a teasing spark in his eyes. “Okay, okay. I’ll bust out the moves if it means I get to stay.”
You squinted at him, trying to keep your expression stern, “You think this is a joke, Icky Boy?”
“No, no,” he shook his head, but his lips twitching up betrayed him, “Of course not. Nothing funny about sneaking a boy in your room—“ your eyes narrowed at him and he grinned, no longer hiding it, “— Don’t I look funny sitting in your room surrounded by pastel colors and— and plushies?”
You gasped, grabbing the closest plushie from him before he could touch it and clutching it to your chest dramatically, “Don’t make fun of my plushies! Niles is very sensitive, and he’s worth more than your shoes, actually.”
“Which pair?” He teased.
You stuck your tongue out at him, but your smile was hard to hide. The tension from sneaking around was melting away, leaving behind something lighter, easier to breathe in. The song had switched from wave to earth and was now playing an EXO song. You turned up the volume on your speaker, not enough to make one of the members knock on your door to tell you to turn it down, but loud to where they wouldn’t be able to hear anything but the music. You reached into the plastic bag and tossed him the chips without even asking, and he caught it with a lazy ease that made you roll your eyes.
“Hater,” he shot at you, pulling open the bag of chips.
“I’m your number one hater,” you nodded in agreement, eyeing him to see what else you could complain about. You watch him pull a chip out of the bag with his left hand, offering it to you first. Your cheeks heat up, but you ignore it and instead ask, “You’re left-handed? Ew.”
“Ew?” he repeated in disbelief, blinking at you. “… Seriously?”
“You’re so weird,” you scrunched your nose up playfully at him, “Weirdo. I knew there had to be something wrong with you.”
“Oh no,” he groaned slightly, putting the chip in his mouth. “You’re one of those people.”
“Yeah,” you nodded, lifting up your right hand and waving it around it, “Right-handed supremacy.”
“Discriminating against left-handed people?” Ni-ki teased, leaning back in your desk chair, “Oh no, I wonder what the Internet would have to say about that. You’re going to get cancelled.”
“Only if you tell,” you smiled, resting your head on your hand, “And if you do, I’ll fight you.”
He raised an eyebrow, “Fight me?” He glanced over you, “You?”
“I could take you,” you scoffed, leaning up to sit upright. He followed your movements, sitting straight in the chair.
“With those tiny fists?” Ni-ki laughed, “Yeah, right. Doubt it.”
“My hands aren’t tiny!” You protested, putting Niles aside like you were actually getting ready to throw hands, “Yours are just excessively large for someone your age. And you underestimate me! I have the element of surprise,” you list off, putting one and then two fingers up, “And I am full of rage that’s been begging to be let out.”
Ni-ki laughed again, tilting his head as he looked at you. “Oh, you’re one of those girls. Small, angry, and delusional.”
You gasped. “Delusional?! You know what? Let’s settle this right now.”
“Yeah?” He leaned forward a little, elbows resting on his knees, gaze flicking over your face with something teasing but curious beneath it. “How?”
You held up your right hand, wrist limp like you were about to slap him, but then closed your fingers and stuck your thumb up, “Thumb war.”
Ni-ki snickered, scooting forward with the chair to reach you without having to lean far, “You’re going down.”
“No mercy,” you warned, locking your fingers with his dramatically. “Three, two, one— go!”
Your thumbs immediately began battling like your life depended on it. You lunged first, but he dodged easily, eyebrows lifting in mock surprise. “Wow,” he said, trying not to laugh. “You really came at me.”
“I told you I’m full of rage,” you huffed, concentrating. “Years of unprocessed anger and being wronged by the girls. This is personal.”
He was laughing now, trying to fight back without crushing your hand, “Sister trauma, huh? I can relate.”
You grin a little at the thought of your members being considered your sisters, but don’t get easily distracted, pinning his thumb down for half a second. You go to cheer quietly, but he wiggled free and laughed, “You thought!”
“Cheater,” you hissed, both of you now holding hands in the weirdest, most competitive grip possible.
“Sore loser,” he grunted lightly, thumb slipping over yours and holding it down, grinning. “Got you.”
“Cheater,” you insisted, pulling your hand back like you’d just been burnt.
Ni-ki shook his head, that annoying proud smile on his face, “Loser.”
“You’re so annoying,” you muttered, shaking out your hand like the loss physically wounded you. But before you could fully retreat, he caught your wrist gently, fingers wrapping around it without thinking. You paused. He wasn’t even gripping tightly, just… holding it. His hand creeped up, lining up with your hand now. And now your hands were back in the space between you, palms facing, fingers still close.
Your eyes darted down. You could feel your hand shaking lightly, even as you pressed your palm to his slowly, lining your fingers up together. His hand easily eclipsed yours, fingers longer, slightly calloused from dance practice, warm even through the gentle pressure.
“Tiny hands,” Ni-ki said quietly, nodding like it confirmed it for him. Neither of you moved away. You could feel the warmth of his skin, the way his fingertips passed yours slightly. His thumb brushed yours once, like it was testing something, and then decided, resting against yours. His pinky curled slightly around yours.
You glanced at him, “Yup. You’re an alien.”
He looked away from your hands, “And you’re a dwarf. What else is new?”
The two of you back away at the same time, letting your hands fall to your sides. He broke eye contact first, clearing his throat and looking at your cork board. “Which one’s your favorite?”
You follow his gaze to the polaroids, all displaying you with different members, even other idols, some he recognized to be IVE and NewJeans members, but none of people who looked like you. “What, picture?”
“Yeah.”
You hummed, putting your finger on your chin as you looked at them all and thought about it, finally pointing at the one in the top right corner, “Probably that one.” The polaroid is old, you can tell by how it’s faded. A younger version of you and Hyeri are in the picture, your mouth full of red velvet cake and the same cake smeared all over Hyeri’s face, mouth caught open in mid-scream. You smiled. “It’s from before we even debuted, back in 2019. It was Suyi’s birthday, and Jiyu dared her to shove some of the cake in Hyeri’s face. I laughed so hard I choked. But so worth it for her reaction.”
He grinned, turning back toward you, “You look happy in it.”
You paused, smile dimming just slightly. “I was,” you said quietly, almost surprised at yourself for being that honest.
He nodded, gaze drifting back up to the cork board. He kept looking, his expression was hard to read now—not blank, not overly focused, just… thoughtful. You watched him for a second too long, the silence stretching in a way that made your chest tighten a little. You could only imagine what he was thinking. Had he noticed that the only people who were frequently on the board were your members and a couple of other idols you were close to?
Ni-ki spoke up before you could, “You miss being a normal person?”
You blinked, caught off guard from the question, “What?”
He glanced over at you, almost sheepish, like maybe he hadn’t meant to say it out loud, but continued on anyway, “I mean—like, before all this. The training, the fans, the cameras… when things were simpler.”
You hesitated, looking down at your blanket. Your first instinct was to laugh it off, saying something cringey like “No, I wouldn’t change it for the world.” But that wasn’t the truth. You looked back up, not exactly looking him in the eye but saying, “Yeah, sometimes.”
Sometimes, when you watch the other members go home to their families during the holidays, or see their parents cheering them on at concerts, you feel it. That ache. You’re not even sure what exactly it is you miss—it’s not like your life before all this was picture-perfect. But maybe it’s the idea of what you could’ve had— the version of family you built in your head never really matched the one you came from.
Ni-ki nodded slowly, gaze returning to the cork board, “You have a lot of pictures with your members.”
You followed his gaze, nodding, “Yep. They’re basically all I’ve got, they’re in every memory I have.” The words came out before you could stop yourself— your tone was too quick, too flat. It was noticeable that something was off. You regretted them the second they left your mouth.
But Ni-ki didn’t flinch, just asked, “Your family doesn’t like taking pictures?”
You shook your head, a small breath escaping as you sank back into your pillows, “There’s not much to put up.” Not ones that didn’t want to make you tear it up and cry and scream. You glanced at him, contemplating with yourself if you should continue before slowly saying, “I… They’re just not really my family anymore.”
Ni-ki’s eyes softened, and he gave a slow, understanding nod, that filled you with relief, “I get it. Sometimes family isn’t just who we’re blood related to—it’s the ones that choose you and you choose back.” He shifted slightly, offering a small, reassuring smile.
You smiled back, but couldn’t handle keeping eye contact with him any longer than for a few seconds and you looked away, “Exactly.” You glanced back at him before looking away again, “Are you close with your members? I know you guys came from a survival show, and that couldn’t have been easy, you know, being competition and all that before.”
Ni-ki shifted in his seat, understanding you wanted a topic change, and rubbed the back of his neck thoughtfully as he looked down, “Yeah, we’re close. I mean, it was kind of weird once you thought about it. It was supposed to be every man for himself one day, and then the next, you’re supposed to be a team who works together well. But I was already close with some of the members like Jay, so it wasn’t too bad. I missed the other trainees, my friends, and it would be hard sometimes for all of us to work together, especially once we started living together properly without cameras on us twenty four seven.” You frowned. “But… I think it was the best outcome,” he nodded, looking up at you, “I couldn’t imagine not debuting with the six of them, I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.”
You smiled softly, chin resting in your hand as you now lay on your stomach, “That’s so cute. I love a good feel good story. A real coming-of-age Netflix original.”
Ni-ki laughed, a full belly laugh that made your smile turn into a grin and you had to look away, feeling warm all over. You didn’t even realize it, but the playlist was back to wave to earth again. You easily recognized it at the start of ‘love’, feeling heat travel to your cheeks. Jesus Christ, you want to somehow throttle the shuffle feature so bad right now.
Ni-ki seemed to notice the sudden shift in your energy, his laugh tapering off as he tilted his head at you with a small, teasing smile. “What?” he asked, voice quieter now, like he knew something had changed but didn’t want to call it out too loud.
You shook your head quickly, playing it off, “Nothing. Stupid song shuffle.”
His eyes lit with quiet amusement, “Wave to earth again?”
You groaned, bringing a penguin plushie to your face, “I swear, it’s not on purpose.”
He chuckled softly, and you heard the stool creak as he leaned forward a little. “You’ve got good music taste, I’ll give you that. But it could be a little better.”
You lower the plushie, raising your eyebrows at him, “Oh, yeah?” You push yourself up in your elbows, “Are you gonna give me recommendations?”
Ni-ki smirked like he’d been waiting for you to ask, bringing his phone out of his pocket. “Obviously,” he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world, “Consider this a public service.”
You squinted at him playfully, “You better not say something basic like your own songs.”
“Our songs aren’t basic,” he pointed at you, unlocking his phone with his other hand, “And they are great, so I am going to.“
You raised your eyebrows, “Spare me. I’ve already listened to them all.”
Ni-ki’s head lifted from looking at his phone, his own brows raising as a smirk appeared, “Oh, yeah?”
You rolled your eyes, flopping back dramatically onto your pillows, “Don’t let it get to your head.”
Ni-ki grinned, clearly enjoying himself and the new information he now had, “Too late. You’re my fan.”
You grabbed a pillow this time and chucked it at him—he dodged effortlessly, laughing as it hit the floor behind him. “I’m not your fan,” you argued, “There’s six other people participating in the songs, you know?”
“But you listen to my music, and I’m your bias because you know me best,” he winked, nodding to himself as he went back to his phone. “No need to lie.” The song changed, and Ni-ki immediately recognized it was Polaroid Love. His grin was immediate, head shooting up to look at you, who was already covering your face with your hands.
The shuffle was seriously out to get you.
Ni-ki nearly doubled over laughing, phone still in hand, “No way.”
You groaned into your palms, “I’m actually going to delete this app.”
“The universe is on my side! Let’s go!” He cackled, kicking his legs a little where he sat, full-on entertained now.
“I hate you,” you huffed, “It went viral, how could I not have it on my playlist?”
“Do you have more songs? Let me see your playlist!” Ni-ki looked a bit crazy now as he lunged for your laptop and you squealed, trying to snatch it away from him and prevent him from landing on you at the same time. He managed to not crush you and landed on his side right next to you, arms stretching over your head.
“No! Go away,” you laughed, grabbing your laptop and putting it on the other side of your bed. “My playlists are private.”
“And here I was, willing to share my playlists with you,” Ni-ki scoffed, “Even willing to make you your own playlist. Crazy.”
So annoying— wait. Hold on a second. He was going to make a playlist just for you to listen to? You don’t ever remember discussing playlists with him, nevermind the fact that you’ve always wanted someone to make you a playlist. It was something you read about in a romance book once, and it struck something within you.
You lifted your head up, eyes narrowing at him, “Hey. My own playlist? Huh—“
Ni-ki raised an eyebrow at your soft tone but didn’t back down, just smirked, clearly enjoying your reaction. “Yeah. Personalized. Created by me. With love and care,” he said dramatically, like he was trying to convince you to buy a scam product.
“Who says I’ll even like these songs?” You asked, feeling your heart beat erratically in your chest. You flop onto your back, no longer so close to him. He only copied your movements, laying on his back next to you.
“Me,” he scoffed, going back to his phone where the Melon app was pulled up. “You want it or not?” He glanced over at you, face softening like he was checking if you genuinely wanted it or not— like he was afraid you’d say no. He was crazy, you decided.
“Shut up,” your voice is muffled into the Hello Kitty plushie you’re holding up to your face. “Send me the damn link already.”
He grinned, “Knew it.”
“You’re so full of yourself,” you groaned, but you couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face. You were just glad he couldn’t see it.
Ni-ki turned his head to look at you, the plushie still blocking your face from his view. He smiled to himself, looking back at his phone and created the playlist, titling it, ‘for my #1 fan’ and laughed at himself out loud.
You brought the plushie down, looking at him curiously, “What?”
“Nothing,” he snickered, the grin on his face giving him away, “Hold on, keep the plushie away from your face—“
You narrowed your eyes, “Why?”
“Because I want to see your face when you get this,” he murmured, tapping on his phone a few times with suspicious glee.
Your phone buzzed with the notification a moment later. You glanced down, unlocking your phone and clicking on the text and the link. You stared at your screen for a moment before looking back up at him slowly.
“… For my number one fan?” you read out loud, deadpan. “Seriously?”
He laughed, “I’m going to start a rumor that I’m your bias,” he paused, “Oh, wait… It’s not a rumor if it’s true, huh?”
You stared at him in disbelief before taking the Hello Kitty plushie and aim to smack him with it, “I hate you.”
Ni-ki just laughed, catching the pillow mid-swing this time, “You wanted this, remember?”
You paused, the plushie still in your hands, your scowl melting into something softer, dangerously close to fond. The playlist was still open on your screen, the title teasing you in bold letters. You let out a quiet breath, letting the plushie drop back onto your chest as you turned your head to look at him. His smile hadn’t faded, still smug and boyish, like he knew exactly what he was doing. “Whatever,” you rolled your eyes, forcing yourself to stop looking at him for too long, “I expect top notch songs.”
“Only the best for the best,” Ni-ki laughed, going back to add songs.
Your face heated up for the nth time that night, bringing the plushie back to your face and cuddling into it, nearly restricting your breath.
He was going to be the death of you if you didn’t do something to stop it.
btw requests are open !! feel free to request a one shot or reaction post for enhypen or if you want something specific for my ni-ki fic or wanna know any hcs for my fic . idk im bored
more i love them bad.. idk im hope im going at a correct pace bc in the timeline, they get together pretty fast, you know as teenagers do. couple of months definitely. im trying to highlight the teasing relationship but also reader is definitely a flirty type of person without even trying so if it seems that way its on purpose 🤷♀️ and ni-ki is just trying to match her vibe LMAO and idk like i think as a teenager, they gain feelings pretty quickly and in reader and ni-ki’s shoes, this is really the first time theyve interacted with someone of the opposite sex and around the same age after they debuted so like… ?? you get me??? i’m just rambling at this point sorry lets go on
series masterlist
December 2022
You had taken a huge risk slipping your number in Ni-ki’s sandwich. You got the idea from Twitter, actually. For years, there’s been an ongoing rumor/joke on social media about the Inkigayo Sandwiches— where an idol would put their number in another idol’s sandwich. You never actually received one, not many idols were around your age when you debuted. But it was the best idea you had, especially since you didn’t have the chance to ask him one-on-one.
The text from an unknown number lit up your phone in the darkness of your room. You glanced away from your laptop, which was playing some romance movie on Netflix, and squinted to see that it wasn’t one of your contacts. Your heart jumped before you grabbed it off the charger, unlocking it with your face.
Unknown 01:37AM
you know, i almost ate the paper
You were glad you were alone because you couldn’t stop the stupidly huge smile on your face. You hesitated on opening it, though, not wanting to seem too eager— like you were waiting for his text or like you had nothing to do.
You 01:42AM
damn you were that hungry?
🥪 01:43AM
i was distracted… but also really hungry💀
but anyways hi
You let out a quiet laugh, having to stop yourself from kicking your feet like a middle schooler. You couldn’t help it, you liked talking to new people, especially ones that weren’t years older than you like a lot of idols used to be. Now, idols closer to your age were debuting but Ni-ki had debuted at the same time as you, and he was only a year younger. And well… it helped that he was cute, too.
You 01:45AM
hi 😊
at least you didnt choke. that would have been embarrassing
i wasn’t sure if you’d text tbh
🥪 01:47AM
i was kinda scared you’d given me the wrong number
You 01:47AM
WHAT
i’d never do such a thing omg?!?!
🥪 01:48AM
yeah i was like what if its a prank…
i’ve heard of the rumors you know
Oh no, you deadpan.
You 01:49AM
what rumors🤔
🥪 01:50AM
oh you know
the inkigayo sandwich ones
where idols use it to hit on their crushes and get their numbers
You winced, not expecting him to know about the sandwiches. You can tell he’s teasing, but you also really don’t want him to actually think that and ruin your friendship before it could start. You keep retyping your message before finally deciding to send it.
You 01:52AM
LMAOO no way
i just didn’t know how else to ask🧍♀️
plus you lowkey looked terrified when i came to ur dressing room so i didnt wanna ask in front of our groups
🥪 01:53AM
i wasnt terrified😭😭 just surprised
i also didnt think you’d come
you were really casual about it tho that was impressive
You 01:54AM
😋 thank you
i think this is the first lesson to learn: never doubt me 😁
do u know how nerve wracking it is to have 7 boys just stare at u
🥪 01:56AM
but you have hundreds of ppl stare at you every day? you’re an idol??
You 01:56AM
yeah that’s different idk
ngl i was shaking the entire time but i have a good poker face
🥪 01:58AM
sunoo would not stop talking about you guys
especially you
You 02:00AM
aww he is really sweet though!! i kinda wish i gave him my number too☹️
🥪 02:01AM
wow
betrayal
am i not enough for you?
You’re having to muffle your giggles so the members don’t hear you, actually kicking your legs in the air this time. Your heart was racing, and you couldn’t believe a boy actually had you like this. You needed help— immediately. You had to get a grip on yourself.
Neither of you ended up sleeping until almost four in the morning. And by seven, you were both awake again—sleep in your eyes, half-functioning, and already texting each other like you hadn’t just spent the whole night doing exactly that.
You wanted to tell someone— the urge to talk about it was getting bigger and harder to resist. But you could already see their reactions— Hyeri, torn from being the responsible leader and her urge to know every detail. Jiyu would be shocked at your audacity before playfully accusing you of being a heartbreaker. Siyu would laugh before immediately searching about him online for something to make fun of you for.
You didn’t know if he’d tell his members, but you hoped not. You kind of liked the idea of it just being between you two.
Unfortunately for you, it was hard for you to hide from your members. You spent twenty-four hours of a day with them, and girls were extremely perceptive that it was terrifying. They’d catch you smiling down at your phone and always typing, but never receive a text message from you.
One morning, you’re shuffling into the kitchen like a zombie where the other three already are. It’s barely five past six in the morning, and there was a long day ahead of you with rehearsals for the Golden Disc Awards. You slumped in the seat next to Hyeri, heavy lidded-eyes that snapped open when your forehead nearly hit the table.
“You’ve been acting weird,” Suyi pointed at you with her spoon before shoving it in her mouth. She has a bowl of cereal in front of her, almost empty.
“No, I’m not,” you responded, avoiding eye contact as you pour yourself some coffee. Hyeri silently slid over the sugar and creamer, squinting at you over her mug that said ‘BEST MOM EVER’ that you got her for Christmas last year. She used it every morning ever since.
“You’re such a liar,” Jiyu cackled, way too loud for six in the morning. She slid her half-eaten plate of kimchi fried rice toward you in offering. “Here. Maybe eating something will help you lie better.”
You sighed, picking at the food with your spoon. You were never much of a breakfast person, but you took a small bite just to get her off your case.
“Y/N,” Hyeri said your name like a warning, putting down her mug. “You can lie to the world, but not to us, okay?”
“I’m not lying,” you rolled your eyes, taking a long sip of coffee. You made a face, it needed more sugar. You snatched the sugar, quickly dumping some in your mug like a maniac.
Hyeri hummed like she didn’t believe you, “Okay…” She dragged out the last letter, “Then I guess you can tell us about who you’ve been texting.”
You scoffed, “Um, hello. I have other friends,” you gestured around and they stared at you with blank looks. You didn’t relent, though, staring hard at them. “Why are you guys so nosy?”
“It’s definitely a boy,” Suyi says absentmindedly, not even looking up from her phone.
Oh no. You rolled your eyes, keeping your face neutral, “Please. The day you catch me acting boy crazy is the day the world ends.” Oh, you little hypocrite, you scream at yourself. Retreat, retreat. All the alarms were going off in your mind. You look down at the plate, forcing yourself to eat.
“I caught you fangirling over BTS the other day,” Jiyu smirked.
“That’s different!” You protested with a mouth full of food, before swallowing it all and finishing your sentence, “They’re idols. Not like I’d ever be talking to them.”
You felt and heard your a vibration on your side from your hoodie’s pocket, but didn’t make any recognition of the sound. The silence following only confirmed your suspicions that they did hear. You could practically feel their “really?” stares on you, so you stood up with the plate in your hands, continuing to shove food in your mouth so you didn’t have to talk, but talking anyway. It came out muffled and barely coherent, “I have to— bye,” before you retreat to the safety and quiet of your room.
You shut the door behind you with your foot before placing the plate down on your desk. You flopped down on your bed with a sigh, hands above your head. Your phone buzzed again, making you roll onto your stomach and pull out your phone. Your heart was picking up the pace, even though you told yourself to chill the fuck out. It’s just a guy.
🥪 06:27AM
my spidey senses are telling me youre awake
or did you manage to fall back asleep even though you shouldnt 🤔
You stared at the screen for a moment, shaking your head to yourself with a stupid, silly smile on your face.
You 06:28AM
i wish i did
i was ambushed as soon as i woke up by my members
🥪 06:30AM
lmao why
You paused. You couldn’t exactly tell him the truth… What would you have said? Oh, I giggle like an idiot over every text message you send me and they’re catching on. Yeah, no.
You 06:33AM
forgot to do dishes before i went to sleep
🥪 06:34AM
rookie mistake
gotta up your game bro
You snickered to yourself, rolling onto your back. You could see the sky slowly getting lighter from behind your curtains. You reminded yourself that you needed to get ready for rehearsals.
You 06:35AM
yes well i was too busy being distracted so not my fault
🥪 06:35AM
distracted huh
must’ve been something really important
You 06:37AM
meh. this weirdo kept sending me tiktoks and saying it was “us”
🥪 06:39AM
oh wow he was trying to entertain you because you said you were bored and you wanna call him a weirdo??
im offended on this guy’s behalf
You let out a soft laugh, putting your phone face down on the bed for a moment. It was stupid how easily this made you happy—how natural it already felt to talk to him. Maybe you were in out of your head, but damn. If this was how it felt, no wonder so many girls fell for it.
You 06:41AM
yeah, nonchalant my ass😭😭
it was nice even if his taste is questionable at best
🥪 06:42AM
excuse you his taste is IMMACULATE
and he is very nonchalant very cool
You 06:43AM
nobody nonchalant and cool says that about themselves
🥪 06:45AM
not talking about me here, remember? i know youre obsessed with me but we’re talking about the guy from last night
You 06:46AM
oh very humble too apparently 🤨
🥪 06:48AM
yeah he’s super charming
great dancer too like the best
he’s tall too
You rolled your eyes, even as a grin spread across your face.
You 06:49AM
sounds fake
Before you can type out your next message, a loud yell came from the living room, “Y/N! If I go in there and you’re asleep, I will shred your photocard collection!” Your eyes widened before hurriedly texting the message.
You 06:50AM
here you go distracting me again
i have to get ready 🫡
before hyeri kills me
🥪 06:50AM
rip
you’ve lived a good life
it was nice knowing you
You lock your phone, still grinning like an idiot, even as you get ready for the day. Oh, you were so in out of your head.
January 2023
“Do they really have to have us in such short clothing when it’s freezing outside and inside?” Suyi demanded lowly, wrapping your shaking body up in a hug. You sighed in relief at the slight warmth emitting from her body, wrapping your arms around her waist and resting your head on her shoulder.
“Finally got the coats,” Hyeri muttered, throwing a coat to each of you. “The stylists had to choose first because apparently it mattered to match them to our outfits, even though we’re freaking freezing.”
“Awesome,” Jiyu’s eyebrows raised, rolling her eyes before pulling her coat on. “Hey, what awards are we nominated for?”
You sniffle, letting go of Suyi and pulling your own on, “Rookie Artist of the Year is the most important, I think.”
“I thought we were also nominated for Song of the Year,” Hyeri frowned.
“But there’s so many good ones this year, like Next Level,” you frown back at her. “I doubt we’ll win that one.”
“Be positive,” Jiyu slapped your knee lightly, grabbing your hand after. “Our performance tonight is going to be so good, even if we don’t win, we’ll definitely get some new fans. We already got some with our comeback a couple days ago, didn’t you see the insane amount of views on the music video?”
You hate to say it, but you’re not listening to her half-way through the sentence. Your attention is grabbed by one of the doors in the hallway opening, and loud laughter filling the already noisy and crowded hallway. You keep watching, even as you vaguely register the girls talking to another girl group next to you.
Ni-ki is following his members out the door, grinning at something someone said. ENHYPEN continued walking past with their manager in front of them when his eyes finally met yours. His expression changed for a split second into surprise before becoming softer, familiar.
You swallow back the lump in your throat. It was the first time you’ve seen him since you started texting him a couple weeks ago, the night after MAMA. Both of you had tours starting soon by the end of the month. It would also probably be the last time you saw him in person for a while. Not that it exactly mattered, you two texted enough for it to be similar to being together in person. It was like you were with each other all day.
His pace slowed down a couple steps behind his members, not too much that it was noticeable but where he was lagging behind just a little. Neither of you said anything aloud, but your eyes continued to stay locked just long enough for your cheeks to heat up.
You looked away first as he continued walking, turning to your members and realizing they were talking to Aespa. You were about to join the conversation until your phone vibrated in your hand. You glanced up, making sure they were still busy talking before opening the notification.
🥪 05:04PM
you look pretty
Your breath caught in your throat. This was technically the first time he complimented your looks— and it was nice to know he did think you were pretty. You thought you were, even though there were some things you might need to work on as you grow older, but you were okay with it for now. You felt your cheeks warm up, and shift slightly in your seat, turning away so your members wouldn’t notice.
You 05:05PM
you look tall
🥪 05:06PM
glad we’re both stating the obvious
don’t bite your lip
wouldnt want you to bleed again
You didn’t even realize you were biting down on your lip. You glanced around, not seeing him before shaking your head slightly. Must’ve been a coincidence, or he just knew you that well already.
You 05:07PM
whateverrr ur lucky im working rn or else i’d bully you til u cry
🥪 05:08PM
looking forward to it 🫡
cant wait to see ur stage btw
you’ll do great
You felt like a tomato. Your face was hot, and the urge to smile was too great to ignore. This was why you couldn’t handle texting him in public. You brush your hair out of your face, quickly texting one last message before placing your phone away.
more this entire chapter is a flashback to when reader and ni-ki met! back in dec. 2022 and these songs are actually kpop songs i just randomly shuffled my playlist to choose lol. enjoy! read the other parts below to keep up !! btw you can read this one first, the other 3 are just timeskips to 2025 lol
series masterlist | main masterlist
December 2022
You felt like your heart was about to beat out of your chest and you’d make headlines for the wrong reasons.
You fiddled with the necklace around your neck, slowly shuffling your foot along the floor. The hallway was equally as stuffy as your dressing room, but at least this way, you wouldn’t be watched all the time. Your nerves were off the charts, you never thought you’d be this nervous for your first award show performance. Of course, it wasn’t the same as music shows, there were more people— and other idols watching, too.
Your hands were shaking, you realized. This was the first time KORE was allowed to go to an award show, usually it was meant for the more popular and actually nominated groups. You guys weren’t exactly ‘nugu’ as you saw on Twitter, and most of your title tracks seemed to be generally liked by the public. But you guys debuted too late in the year in 2020 and then there were no award shows due to COVID last year.
However, KORE managed to get a nomination this time, especially after the success their last comeback had. You would even be going on a world tour in the first quarter of 2023. It was unexpected— to even be invited to MAMA and get nominated, as well as having a world tour, as a group from a small, broke company.
You could say KORE was the sole reason JET Entertainment’s lights were on. Not that you would ever say that out-loud unless it was just you and the girls, but still. Everyone on Twitter said it enough for you.
You gnaw down on your bottom lip, not realizing how harsh you were going at it until you feel liquid dripping down your chin. You gasp softly, feeling your lip with your fingers and cursing under your breath when you see the small amount of blood. It would surely swell up in time for the performance and then you’d look all swollen… Why were you so stupid?!
You were too busy in the middle of your loud thoughts to notice that someone was standing right next to you, only noticing when they cleared their throat. Your eyes were wide and startled as they dart up, looking at the tissue they were offering in their hand and following up their arm. You blink.
Ni-ki from ENHYPEN was offering you a tissue, not exactly meeting your eyes and more looking at your forehead. You’ve never been so suddenly insecure of your forehead before. “Your lip’s bleeding,” he coughed.
You quickly took the tissue from his hand, pressing it to your lip as your face burned. This was mortifying. Had he watched you practically eat your bottom lip? “Thanks,” you muttered, voice muffled.
Ni-ki just nodded once, rocking slightly on the balls of his feet. He doesn’t leave, though. The two of you are silent as the rest of the hall continues to be busy with staff running around. It’s not an uncomfortable, stifling silence, but it’s definitely awkward. You slowly take a peek at him from the corner of your eye, catching him looking back at you before hurriedly looking away once he realized he was caught.
You smile slightly behind the tissue, before frowning when you can feel that your bottom lip is fatter than usual. Your thought is interrupted when Ni-ki spoke up again, “I, uh,” he rubbed the back of his neck, staring down at his shoes, “My band member… Sunoo, the cute one,” he glanced up and you nod, even though all of them are cute, but you know which one Sunoo is. “He likes your group. A lot.”
Your brows raised in surprise, the hand holding the tissue slowly falling back to your side, “Really?”
“Yeah,” he nodded, glancing up at you, “You guys are in like all of his playlists,” the corner of his lips twitched up, making you slowly replicate it, “He, uh, also made me watch some of your guys comeback stages.” He seemed more sheepish admitting it, now, no longer looking at you and looking around the hallway.
Your eyes widen, forcing your face to stay neutral before he can look up at you, “Oh. I’ve watched some of yours, too,” you say, twirling a piece of your hair around your finger to occupy yourself so you didn’t have to look at him. You could feel your face burning as you admit, “Your stages are really cool, borderline intimidating.”
Ni-ki glanced up at you, surprise on his face before he laughed slightly, “Thank you. I—I’ve also heard some of your other songs, too,” he nodded his head as he spoke, “Your voice is…” he faltered, face burning as he continued softly, “Pretty—powerful. Pretty powerful,” he nodded again, not looking at you anymore.
You felt like chewing on your hair. But that would be weird.
You stop yourself before you can burst into loud giggles, knowing it’d only embarrass you more and simply cover your stupid smile with the tissue, “Thank you. So… I thought you said Sunoo showed you our comeback stages.”
He looked like a deer in headlights. You press your hand to your mouth to stop yourself from laughing, staring up at him expectantly. He looked around him like someone would come and save him from this conversation.
You couldn’t explain the giddy feeling you got, it didn’t make any sense— you hardly knew this guy, and you often stayed away from watching groups’ content if they were around the same age as you. You still listened to their songs, of course. It was just for precaution, because mostly your mind was a dangerous and delusional place. But the fact that someone you thought was cool— and a really good dancer, so that gave him even more points in your book, listened to your music? Not just the fun, silly title tracks, but the side tracks that you and your members pour your hearts into writing and composing when you get the opportunity.
Ni-ki ducked his head slightly, nodding once, “ASAP was really catchy… So maybe I looked up a few more performances.”
You couldn’t help the giggle that escaped this time, tilting your head as your smile grew, “So you looked us up?”
He laughed bashfully, face flushing deeper as he glanced up at you once, “I— yeah. I was… curious.”
“Right,” you muttered, nodding slowly like you believed him. You did, but it was kind of fun to tease him— he kept getting more red. “So what other songs do you like of ours besides ASAP?”
He hesitated for a second, clearly caught off guard by your question, but then shrugged, eyes darting to the floor again. “Uh… Hurt is good,” he said, then added quickly, “And Sweet Juice. That one’s stuck in my head all the time.”
Your eyes widened in genuine surprise. The songs weren’t title tracks, and you guys had never performed Hurt or Sweet Juice live— not until your upcoming tour. Those were songs you’d only expect fans to know. “Seriously?”
He laughed quietly, nodding, “Yeah.”
You grinned, fiddling with your fingers and offering, “Well, I like Just A Little Bit and Not For Sale.”
His eyes lit up slightly, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “Really?” he asked, like he wasn’t sure you meant it.
You nodded, “Yeah, I also really liked Fever! Your songs are good, Ni-ki.”
Ni-ki looked like he was trying really hard not to smile too wide, his head ducking slightly as he let out a quiet laugh. Before he could respond, a familiar voice yelled out your real name, making you turn. Hyeri was leaning out of your dressing room, tapping her wrist as if to remind you of the time.
You looked back to Ni-ki, both of you realizing that you’d been talking for a moment and now you had to go, “I— ah, I should go,” he nodded immediately, still not exactly looking at you. “Thanks again,” you hold up the tissue slightly, “And for listening to our music.”
Ni-ki nodded again, the corners of his mouth still twitching like he couldn’t stop himself from smiling, even if he tried. “Yeah. Of course. Good luck on your performance. I’ll … see you around.”
You hovered for a second longer, suddenly reluctant to leave the awkward little bubble the two of you had somehow made in the middle of a hallway. “Maybe I’ll, um… stop by and say hi to our biggest fan.”
Ni-ki let out a short, surprised laugh, shaking his head slightly as he looked down, then back up at you through his lashes. “You mean Sunoo, right?” he asked, but there was a playful lilt to his voice. Your heart skipped.
You grinned, one eyebrow lifting as you began to step backwards. “Obviously. Who else would I be talking about?”
He laughed again, softer this time, and even though his hands were in his pockets and his stance was casual, his eyes were on you. “Right,” he said, smiling. “I’ll let him know.”
You turned with a soft shake of your head, but just before you slipped into the dressing room, you looked back over your shoulder one last time.
Ni-ki was still standing there, watching you. You smiled slightly, waving goodbye before ducking into the dressing room and closing the door behind you.
Ni-ki didn’t actually expect you to stick to your word. It was always hectic after, and he was sure you’d be busy and forget. But you do.
Twenty minutes after ENHYPEN’s performance, they’re in their dressing room, cooling down with small hand fans and bottles of water. Ni-ki’s sitting on the couch, hand fan in his hair with a cold water bottle on his neck. His feet are up on the table in front of the couch, something one of the others will probably smack him for to get him to take them off. The other members are in similar states, spread out in the dressing room. Jake’s even lying on the floor, claiming it’s cold.
A knock on the open door made everyone look up, and Ni-ki’s eyes widened slightly. All four girls of KORE stood at the door, you standing in the front. The other girls were looking a bit uneasy. He glanced at Sunoo, who was looking both a little starstruck and confused at the sight of you.
You’re still in your performance outfit, the same one he saw you wearing earlier. Your cheeks are a bit red, probably from your performance, but he thought it was cute. Your performance was really good, with a sharp and clean dance break he didn’t expect to be paired with your title songs. It did show off that your group could be versatile, showing a side that your title tracks didn’t show much.
“Hello,” all four of you bowed, before your leader pushed you forward a little. You side-eye her before plastering a bigger smile on, and taking the lead of the conversation, “Sunoo, right?” You look straight at him, even though you knew his name already.
Sunoo blinked, nodding his head slowly, “I— Yeah.”
You beam, but are shyly playing with your fingers in front of you even as you keep your eyes only on Sunoo. It seemed you were aware of the six other boys in the room also watching and listening in. “I heard from a little birdie that you listen to our songs. We just wanted to say thank you for listening.” As if on cue, all four bow.
Sunoo brightened up, “Oh my— yes! I’ve been listening since Nonstop! All of your songs are really catchy, they’re on all the time.”
“Sometimes even on loop,” Sunghoon spoke up and the others chuckle in amusement.
You glanced over at Sunghoon as he talked, laughing quietly in amusement. Ni-ki’s eyes were still on you, though, and he froze when your eyes darted away from Sunghoon and straight to him. He straightened up in his seat, putting his legs down from the table and clearing his throat softly before looking away.
“Ah, so you’re why we have so many streams,” you giggled, still talking to Sunoo, but Ni-ki can tell you’re not only just laughing because of him. You laughed before you even started to say anything.
Sunoo is busy rambling on about his favorite B-side tracks and choreographies, now standing up and closer to your group. You’re attentively listening, but mostly let your members lead the conversation now that the rest of the members have gone back to their own things. Everyone except Ni-ki.
Ever so often, your eyes would flicker back over to Ni-ki, but you don’t say anything to him. Neither does he.
Later on, Ni-ki would be internally beating himself up for not saying anything. But for now, he just sat back and listened, trying to pretend like he was in his own world and definitely not listening in on your conversation.
It was probably safer that way— that way, he couldn’t embarrass himself in front of both of your groups. Still, the amount of times your eyes would meet his before both of you hastily looked away was extreme. It was deliberate on your part.
You weren’t just here for Sunoo. Even if you barely acknowledged him in front of everyone else, he wasn’t stupid.
His lips tugged upward before he casually covered them with his arm. God forbid one of the members caught him smiling at nothing— in front of you.
He saw the way your eyes lingered when you thought no one was paying attention to you, the way you laughed a second later than everyone else at Sunoo’s funny joke. When your leader nudged you again—probably to get you to wrap it up—and you offered one last thank-you to Sunoo, bowing with the rest of the girls before turning to leave, Ni-ki thought that would be it. He’d probably see you again the next time your comebacks line up or maybe in exactly a year, at the same award show.
Just before you fully stepped out of the dressing room, you looked over your shoulder. It was quick, like he blinked and you were already turning away. But he saw it— the small smile on your lips, eyes deliberately connecting with his before you winked.
His brows raised, watching you walk away with your members until you were out of his sight and then he looked around the room to see if anyone else caught that. No one was looking at him funny, so it was safe to assume no one did.
He sighed almost silently, slumping back in his seat and switching the fan off. The rest of the members were getting ready to leave, but he wanted to stay sitting and quietly sulk to himself for a moment. He did kind of wish you said something to him, but then what would you say? It would probably only end in his members teasing him, asking him all sorts of questions just because you were a girl that interacted with him. That didn’t happen very much unless said girl was a fan or his sisters, and well, he didn’t really count them if he was being honest.
Their manager, Yuki, started handing out sandwiches and he handed one to Ni-ki that had his name written on it. He murmured a thanks, unwrapping the plastic and going to take a bite of it when something fell with the plastic wrap on his lap. His brows furrowed, glancing around before grabbing the small white slip of paper and reading it.
I really liked talking to you. Keep this our little secret?
+82 ** **** ****
p.s. you won’t believe how hard it was to sneak this in here lol
Ni-ki couldn’t help the smile that lifted his face before he quickly put the paper in his pocket and took a bite of his sandwich.
The sandwich tasted better than usual. Not because they did something different with it— no, of course not. He had a feeling it had something to do with you, and your number.
pairing nishimura riki / ni-ki of enhypen/female idol!reader
summary every glance makes a headline. fans take everything out of proportion. you and riki struggle through a relationship in an industry that doesn’t want their artists to be human.
warnings time jumps, mentions of mental health, mentions of eating disorders/hospitalizations, stalkers/sasaengs, the reality of fame, slice of life, more to be added
more you can read before or now first since i posted the chapters out of order, but i’d probably recommend reading in chronological order, starting with december 2022.
germansingergirl
2087
tangentwithtanner
turnnoffyourmind
dailybridgerton
kianamaiart
