breathe.

[fallen-in-love-suggestion]

making u smile always feels like an accomplishment to me because everytime you do your eyes shine like a million stars and i feel happy again

[dimpledthings]

you have changed my life for the better

[inkskinned]

Actually life is beautiful because the sound I make while trying to breathe around hot food sounds like my dog trying to eat an apple. When I yawn my cat tries to put his face in my mouth like a little dentist man and when he yawns I put my finger in his obligate-carnivore trapzone and we both know he will not hurt me. When I do not fold my clothes, they do not hold it against me.

I am demonstrably sad, and lonely, and full of fear. But there are other people who will hold my hand, who will point out the hawk overhead, who will give you That Look in a public place. The other day at a coffee shop a child said "look! It's snowing!" so all of us strangers went to go look out the windows. It wasn't the first snow and it won't be the last but wasn't it lovely like that?

How wonderful to live in a world where birds and frogs both say beep! How wonderful to have an ocean of beautiful sharks with their dinosaur teeth! How wonderful the moon and her changing face, how wonderful the bees and their dancing to communicate, how wonderful shrimp and their forbidden layers of vision! How wonderful, you, and what you will give the world! The way we love things enough to spend entire blogs devoted to them? How people will let me explain my Pokemon team to them? How we will both jump at the scare in the movie, how we laugh so loudly, how it feels to give someone your baking? How wonderful to be alive. I am sorry for forgetting.

This is the process of getting better. With wonderful people and wonderful strangers and wonderful friends: I am getting better, slowly. Thank you, whoever you are. In some way, you've been wonderful, and left a wonderful place in the world to ripple out to me. In some small way - isn't it beautiful - I promise, you've been helping.

[ravens-play-exy-too]

everyone’s like “dark academia” this and “light academia” that but no one talks about “medium academia” where everything is average and predictable but we’re trying our best even if we’re not as gifted or murderous as our peers

[catscenter]

[princesstigerbelle]

The bean thief

[frogmp3]

greem beam

[facethemuses]

21 yr old Snape: Numb by Linkin Park

31 yr old Snape: Numb by Linkin Park (80s remix)

[ben-lyintous]

‘I’M JUST A KID AND LIFE IS A NIGHTMARE’ i scream at the age of 23 as i’m forced to make adult phonecalls

[dr0wsydruid]

"But Bixby," you say, "how do you know when your special interests wake up again?"

"Oh, I just know," I say, as I follow every single Snape related blog that comes up on my dash

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

You dare use my own spells against me, Potter? Yes. I’m the Half-Blood Prince.

[thecryptkeeper]

[andhumanslovedstories]

Do you ever eat popcorn out of the palm of your own hand with such ardent desperation that you feel like both a wild horse and the gentle schoolgirl feeding it treats to gain its affection 

[beauty-in-healing-deactivated20]

this is the funniest thing i have ever read

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

All I do is act incorrectly in response to stimuli

[dr0wsydruid]

Guess who's back and also on a wild snape kick

Just

Just look at

Ugh

[falyros]

A thought that arises from the idea of tiefling babies often ending up being abandoned: A rich tiefling adventurer retiring and starting up a tiefling orphanage that takes care of rejected tiefling babies and children.

[obsoletesystem]

A thought that arises from the idea of a tiefling orphanage: the rich tiefling adventurer regretting his initiative of filling a mansion with dozens of little devils that all can cast Thaumaturgy. At will.

[falyros]

Oh Boy. :’D

Personally I headcanon that tiefling magic starts to manifest around puberty, but if that wasn’t the case, they’d just have to suck it up and tiefling baby-proof the hell out of the place. B) Have no vases and stuff that might fall over and break during tremors. Have sturdy furniture. Lock doors and windows. Avoid having open flames around. Shove cotton or something into your ears.

Oh yeah, and some of the babies might in that case be able to cast friends, minor illusion, ray of frost, or mage hand. Could result in chaos…

[obsoletesystem]

My next one shot is definitely going to be “A party of tiefling babies escape from the orphanage (to go to the candy shop)”

[falyros]

[starlinedsword-deactivated20240]

sorry to hijack this post but i’ve been drinking coffee and had ideas for how to actually bring this to life so:

BABY TIEF HEIST ONESHOT

PLAYER RULES

You are all tiefling toddlers, each pick a different subrace

All your stats are 10, then apply your racial boosts.

you have 4 hp (5 if you have the con boost) if you reach zero, you are unconscious. 

Your only abilities are your racial traits.

You have broken out of the orphanage with no money, and seek a treasure trove of candy from the store. 

How you retrieve this candy, without being apprehended, is up to you.

DM RULES

Any environmental or effect that could potentially hurt a toddler will only deal 1 hp of damage.

The candy store functions as a dungeon:

the shopkeep is a final boss (objectively has 5 hp if they go the combat route, however, this would only cause him to fall unconcious— there will be no toddler murder.)

other patrons are to be befriended or avoided. 

Any creature that is not considered Charmed by the toddlers, whether by magic or exceptional persuasion checks and baby tief cuteness, will report any thievery they see.

Environmental hazards can include

gumballs on the floor

getting distracted by a cute kitty or dog

the candy is on the top shelf!!! just out of reach!

To reach your goal:

you must steal a pound of candy for each player character. you may also steal excess to aid you in your heist just be careful how much you use.

Candy

Lollipops: if you consume a lollipop you can regain 2 hp. (5 lollipops = pound, you may grab 3 at once)

Gumballs: gumballs can be spilled on the floor, functioning like a bag of ball bearings. (20 gumballs = a pound, using gumballs wastes half a pound, you may grab 5 gumballs at once) 

Chocolate: Invokes Sugar Rush. (2 chocolate = a pound, you may grab 1 at once, 1 chocolate = one sugar rush)

Sugar Rush gives you advantage on all strength and dexterity checks for five minutes (since initiative hopefully will not be a factor, if it is invoked in a combat situation, the duration is 1 minute), however after, you must make a DC: 15 con save to avoid falling asleep for a post-sugar nap. 

You may design your candy store as you will for maximum chaos

roll a d10 + 1 for the number of potential patrons within.

those are just a few small things i thought of for how to run this oneshot for maximum cuteness, creativity and chaos!

[thymoss]

“Participatory democracy begins at home. If you are planning to implement your politics, there are certain things to remember. 1. He is feeling it more than you. He’s losing some leisure and you’re gaining it. The measure of your oppression is his resistance. 2. A great many American men are not accustomed to doing monotonous, repetitive work which never issues in any lasting, let alone important, achievement. This is why they would rather repair a cabinet than wash dishes. If human endeavors are like a pyramid with man’s highest achievements at the top, then keeping oneself alive is at the bottom. Men have always had servants (us) to take care of this bottom stratum of life while they have confined their efforts to the rarefied upper regions. It is thus ironic when they ask of women-Where are your great painters, statesmen, etc.? Mme. Matisse ran a military shop so he could paint. Mrs. Martin Luther King kept his house and raised his babies. 3. It is a traumatizing experience for someone who has always thought of himself as being against any oppression or exploitation of one human being by another to realize that in his daily life he has been accepting and implementing (and benefiting from) this exploitation; that his rationalization is little different from that of the racist who says, “Black people don’ t feel pain’ (women don’t mind doing the shitwork); and that the oldest form of oppression in history has been the oppression of 50 percent of the population by the other 50 percent. 4. Arm yourself with some knowledge of the psychology of oppressed peoples everywhere, and a few facts about the animal kingdom. I admit playing top wolf or who runs the gorillas is silly but as a last resort men bring it up all the time. Talk about bees. If you feel really hostile bring up the sex life of spiders. They have sex. She bites off his head. The psychology of oppressed peoples is not silly. Jews, immigrants, black men and all women have employed the same psychological mechanisms to survive’ admiring the oppressor, glorifying the oppressor, wanting to be like the oppressor, wanting the oppressor to like them, mostly because the oppressor held all the power. 5. In a sense, all men everywhere are slightly schizoid-divorced from the reality of maintaining life. This makes it easier for them to play games with it. It is almost a cliché that women feel greater grief at sending a son off to a war or losing him to that war because they bore him, suckled him, and raised him. The men who foment those wars did none of those things and have a more superficial estimate of the worth of human life. One hour a day is a low estimate of the amount of time one has to spend “keeping” oneself. By foisting this off on others, man has seven hours a week-one working day more to play with his mind and not his human needs. Over the course of generations it is easy to see whence evolved the horrifying abstractions of modern life. 6. With the death of each form of oppression, life changes and new forms evolve. English aristocrats at the turn of the century were horrified at the idea of enfranchising working men-were sure that it signaled the death of civilization and a return to barbarism. Some working men were even deceived by this line. Similarly with the minimum wage, abolition of slavery, and female suffrage. Life changes but it goes on. Don’t fall for any line about the death of everything if men take a turn at the dishes. They will imply that you are holding back the revolution (their revolution). But you are advancing it (your revolution). 7. Keep checking up. Periodically consider who’s actually doing the jobs. These things have a way of backsliding so that a year later once again the woman is doing everything. After a year make a list of jobs the man has rarely if ever done. You will find cleaning pots, toilets, refrigerators and ovens high on the list. Use time sheets if necessary. He will accuse you of being petty. He is above that sort of thing (housework). Bear in mind what the worst jobs are, namely the ones that have to be done every day or several times a day. Also the ones that are dirty-it’s more pleasant to pick up books, newspapers, etc., than to wash dishes. Alternate the bad jobs. It’s the daily grind that gets you down. Also make sure that you don’ t have the responsibility for the housework with occasional help from him. “I’ll cook dinner for you tonight” implies it’s really your job and isn’t he a nice guy to do some of it for you. 8. Most men had a rich and rewarding bachelor life during which they did not starve or become encrusted with crud or buried under the liner. There is a taboo that says women mustn’ t strain themselves in the presence of men-we haul around 50 pounds of groceries if we have to but aren’t allowed to open a jar if there is someone around to do it for us. The reverse side of the coin is that men aren’t supposed to be able to take care of themselves without a woman. Both are excuses for making women do the housework. 9. Beware of the double whammy. He won’t do the little things he always did because you’re now a “Liberated Woman,” right? Of course he won’t do anything else either…. I was just finishing this when my husband came in and asked what I was doing. Writing a paper on housework. Housework? he said. Housework? Oh my god how trivial can you get? A paper on housework.”

— The Politics of Housework, Pat Mainardi, Redstockings, 1970 (via leftclausewitz)

[rex-luscus]

Does anybody else think “man, I’d do so many things if I felt better” but once you feel better you don’t do anything cuz you just want to chill and enjoy not feeling bad?

[summerstarsandsea]

Y e a h

[whyearth]

“I just need to rest my eyes” *falls asleep for 11 hours*