He's an absolute priss when it comes to cleanliness. Blood, dirt, vomit - he can't stand any of it. He will actually stop everything he's doing (no matter how important it is) just to bathe if, god forbid, any of it gets on him. Obviously the only exception is in the heat of battle, when his adrenaline is pumping and the only thing he cares about is staying alive, but you can bet he's gonna be washing off all that sweat and gore the instant he gets a chance.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
So I finally worked up the courage to post my work on ao3, for any of you who are interested. I’ve only posted one work so far and it’s the same oneshot that I already posted here on tumblr, but there will be (hopefully soon) more to come.
I also wanted to shout out @mamma-dragon and @evil-is-relative for the very kind words yall put in your tags about my work. You really made my day so thank you both :)
Summary: Miraak lets go of the past and looks towards his future.
Pairing: Miraak/f!LDB
Warnings: fluff, flirting, light angst, brief descriptions of ptsd, mentions of violence, possible thalassophobia triggers
Word Count: 1879
Prompt: none
A/N: this is the first oneshot I've ever posted on this site, so pls be gentle lol. Also I'm on mobile, so sorry about any spelling/grammatical errors. Find me on ao3
The only sound to be heard was the soft splash of the oars cutting through the water. No sound of waves crashing against the shore or the cry of seagulls, for even they didn't fly out this far.
If he squinted hard enough, Miraak could just barely make out the rocky outline of the northern coast far behind the Last Dragonborn.
The midday sky above was overcast and the ocean breeze was bitter. More than once he'd seen her shiver from a particularly harsh gale only to pretend that she didn't. A storm was brewing on the sea behind him, though with luck it would be many hours before it reached them.
"Not much further, now." Her eyes were fixed on the dark waves as she spoke.
"You've been saying that for the past hour." He grumbled, his arms starting to feel sore from this seemingly endless amount of rowing.
She looked at him out of the corner of her eye, a faint teasing smirk on her lips.
"Well, this time I mean it."
His gaze flickered down to the wooden chest resting by her feet, his curiosity still piqued as to its contents and purpose for being here.
He'd asked about it at the beginning of their voyage, among many other questions, but of course she'd just shrugged him off like she always does and said he'd find out once they were far out at sea. Well, they were far out enough.
He stopped rowing and fixed her with a hard stare.
"I'm not rowing another inch until you tell me what we're doing out here."
She finally turned and faced him fully, one of her dark eyebrows arched upwards. With a dead serious look in her eyes, she spoke.
"Isn't it obvious? I'm going to kill you, lock your corpse in this chest and dump it in the sea."
He blinked at her once, twice.
"Is it impossible for you not to act like a child all the time?"
She rolled her eyes then, with a sigh, she leaned over the chest and lifted the lid. Miraak peered inside with curiosity. His eyes narrowed at what he saw.
"Are those..."
"The Black Books, yes." She said, wrapping her arms around herself as another breeze rolled by.
True to her word, inside the confines of the chest were all seven of Hermaeus Mora's forbidden tomes, each individually wrapped in animal skins and tightly bound with rope.
"He will not be happy if we do this." Miraak cautioned after a short pause, his eyes still fixed on the evil books before him.
The books that had brought him nothing but suffering. Just looking at them made him feel... uneasy, for lack of a better word. It was the same feeling he always had in Apocrypha: alone, yet constantly under watch by an unseen entity.
She just shrugged nonchalantly. "He's not exactly thrilled with me anyways."
He stared at her, his brows pinched together. "Why?"
For a moment she appeared confused. "For starters, I shot him with Auriels bow, temporarily destroyed his plane of Oblivion and stole his favorite champion?"
He rolled his eyes and huffed out a breath. "No. I mean, why are you doing this?" He gestured towards the chest to make his meaning clear.
"Oh," she mumbled, suddenly avoiding eye contact with him. When she finally focused back on him, it was with a seriousness he'd rarely seen from her before.
"These books have brought us nothing but misery -- you most of all." He winced involuntarily at her words, but she continued. "Maybe doing this will give you- us, some closure. If not, then at least it'll piss Hermaeus Mora off, which is good enough for me."
He scoffed, "He is probably laughing at us as we speak, you know."
"Yeah. Well, he can choke on his own tentacles for all I care. Now, are you gonna keep rowing or what?" She asked, feigning irritation as she shut the lid of the chest.
He rolled his eyes but seeing as she revealed why they were there, he stayed true to his word and continued pushing the boat further out to sea.
"You are too eager to defy the Daedra." He admonished lightheartedly.
She shrugged, "We defeated him once. We can do it again."
He gave no response, though there were many things he wanted to say. Most notably that she was naive to think they could defeat a Daedric Prince twice. They'd merely gotten lucky the first time. He wanted to say that, but he didn't.
After a brief silence, she spoke again.
"How long has it been now?"
"Nine months, 14 days." He answered without skipping a beat.
"How time flies," she mused. "It feels like only yesterday that I was nursing you back from the brink of death."
"Don't remind me."
She smirked at his sour tone.
"Come on, I wasn't that bad of a caretaker."
Again, he didn't respond.
Miraak would much rather forget those first few weeks after he was freed from Apocrypha -- after she freed him from Apocrypha -- when he was so weak and ill that he couldn't even walk by himself, and he was forced to rely on the Dovahkiin's good will to help him.
He hated feeling so powerless. So vulnerable.
He'd learned from an young age how to take care of himself, but all those years trapped in Oblivion made him forget. For a long time it pained him to admit how much he needed her in the beginning, to help him remember how to be human. It wasn't quite as painful to admit now, but he'd still rather not be reminded of it.
"Is it such a bad thing to let others take care of you from time to time?" She asked, as if reading his thoughts.
"In my time, relying too much on others was a good way to get yourself killed."
"You're not in that time anymore."
She looked at him with a sincerity that made his insides ache. He almost couldn't stand it -- these feelings she aroused in him.
He looked down at the chest again, just so he didn't have to bear that look anymore.
"This should be far enough." She said suddenly.
Miraak stopped rowing and secured the oars in place. He watched curiously as she reached into her satchel laying on the bench beside her and withdrew an iron padlock. She paused for a split second before reaching out towards him with the padlock.
With little hesitation on his part, he took it from her open palm, his fingers lightly grazing against her skin. He saw goosebumps raise on her arm as he withdrew his fingers, but chalked it up to the cold. For a Nord, she didn't handle the cold very well.
His hands felt heavier than usual as he reached forward and snapped the lock shut around the latch, sealing the chest.
When he looked up at her, there was a hint of relief in her eyes. Like a huge weight had already been lifted from her shoulders. He felt it too.
"Ready?"
He nodded, unwavering.
They both stood carefully as to not tip the small rowboat over, each grabbing one side of the chest, and leveraged it precariously on the boats edge. Kneeling side by side, they shared one last look of determination then, after a deep breath, they pushed the chest overboard. Together they peered over the edge and watched it sink into the dark water below. With all luck, it will remain lost to the depths of the Sea of Ghosts forever.
Then they waited.
A minute passed, two minutes. For what felt like forever they remained there, holding their breaths as they stared into the icy water. Nothing ever happened. No mass of angry, slimy tentacles appeared over them, threatening to disembowel them for desecrating his precious tomes.
When it finally felt safe to do so, they each exhaled their long held breaths. Relief finally settled in his bones.
She spoke after another significant pause, if only to break the ice.
"When I 'won' the Oghma Infinium, the first thing I did with it was drop it into the sea. At least now it's wretched cousins can keep it company."
"Mora will not let this go unpunished. Sooner or later he will have his revenge." He hated that his voice wavered ever so slightly. He was never one to show fear. He could feel it, yes, but he certainly never showed it.
If she noticed, she gave no indication.
"Yes, he will," she said, her tone not lacking in surety. "And when he does, we will face him together."
Then she turned towards him, a faint smile on her face. His stomach nearly jumped out of his throat when her hand slowly slid over to rest atop of his own. Strangely though, he didn't move away. He should've moved away, but he found that he didn't want to.
Even before he'd been imprisoned for thousands of years, Miraak had gone out of his way to avoid intimacy. It was nothing but a weakness to be used against him. After being completely devoid of the touch of others for so long, he'd forgotten how nice it could feel.
Seeming to act on a will of it's own, his hand turned upwards and sought her own significantly smaller one. Her ice cold skin immediately warmed at his touch.
"Together." He repeated with a nod.
Her smile grew a little bit brighter, her cheeks turning a faint pink. It was only due to the cold air, or so he told himself.
"But until then," he continued, "let's get somewhere warm. You're freezing out here."
She gave his hand a little squeeze before pulling away, much to his disappointment. He tried not to let it show, but the way her smirk grew even more told him he was not as stoic as he thought.
His disappointment quickly faded, however, as he watched her take a seat on the bench he'd previously occupied. Still smiling, she crossed one leg over the other and pat the empty space next to her.
"Yes, let's go home."
Home. She'd never called it that before. It was always 'my house' or 'the house', but never 'home'.
Struggling to contain his own smile, he sat down next to her and started unfastening the oars. Before he could react, she scooted closer to him and huddled against his side, digging her hands into his robes for warmth.
She was shivering worse than he'd realized.
He wrapped one of his arms around her to grab the other oar. She angled her body in a way that allowed him to row while still being close enough to absorb his warmth. With a tranquil sigh, she rested her cheek on his chest, the peek of her head stopping just below his chin.
He tried to tell himself she was just cold, but he knew better. He'd always known better.
It was in that moment, with his ferocious little Dragonborn cuddled against his body for warmth, he realized that she was his home, and to his surprise, that wasn't such a scary thought.
For the first time in a long time, he had something worth holding onto and he never planned on letting go.
Although Miraak is an absolute beast by modern standards (my personal hc has him at 6'8", 203lbs), he was actually considered to be fairly average size for an Atmoran man in the merethic era, maybe even on the smaller side of average.
Back then, the average height of an Atmoran man was 6'7"-6'10", while the women clocked in at around 6'2"-6'5". The Atmorans were practically giants by today's standards, and Miraak is still no exception despite being on the 'short' side.
His name means Brutality, and he more than lives up to it. Do not be fooled by his youthful appearance, as Hevnoraak is actually several decades older than he appears. He maintains his visage with the blood sacrifice of his own followers, whom he sees as nothing more than cattle to be slaughtered for his purposes. Only one thing matters to him: Everlasting life. He cares for little else, not even what remains of his kin.
Krosis
Her name means Sorrow, for her grim countenance. Commonly known as one of the more benevolent of the Dragon Priests, Krosis rules for the sake of others rather than herself. If situation permits she is known to be kind and fair, but that doesn't mean she is one to be trifled with. When Paarthurnax was called upon by Kyne to teach mankind use of the Thu'um, Krosis served as his chief acolyte.
Miraak
His name means Allegiance Guide, for his belief that he will lead those loyal to him to salvation. Miraak hated the dragons long before he became a Priest of their Order, but like many others, he was forced to serve in order to survive. When a Demon appeared to him after decades of servitude and told him of his Dragonborn lineage, offering him the knowledge to expand his power, Miraak saw it as his chance for revenge.
Morokei
His name means Glorious, for his many accomplishments in both battle and politics. Morokei is one of few Priests who chooses to forgo the use of magic to preserve his youth, as he believes there are far more grand uses of the Arcane arts. Many say he is the most powerful of the Dragon Priests, though there are some among their Order who would argue. What cannot be argued is Morokei's aptitude for leadership; for almost two centuries he's been the reigning Priest of the thriving capital, Bromjunaar.
Nahkriin
Her name means Vengeance, for those who wrong her are sure to know her wrath. Unlike her peers, Nahkriin has chosen to serve her overlords in solitude, on the lonely summit of Skuldafn. She believes Alduin's right to rule is absolute and therefore has no interest in the petty issues of mankind. Beware whoever dare attempt to rise against her master, as she will destroy them without thought or mercy.
Otar the Mad
They call him Mad, but he wasn't always that way. Otar was once a powerful Chieftan - strong and good willed - but as years went on, his mind began to slip and he became cruel and unwise. Most believe old age to be the cause of his descent into insanity, though there are others who think a more malevolent force is responsible. Of them, most are quick to suspect Hevnoraak - who is known for dabbling in mind control magic - but there is no evidence to support this theory and no soul brave enough to accuse him.
Volsung
Her name means Horrible, for she inspires dread among all who look upon her. Although the youngest of the Dragon Priests, Volsung is not to be underestimated. Constantly living in the shadow of her powerful older brother, she has had to work double to make her own mark on the land, much to her success. For she is one of the most feared and respected among their Order, though still less so than Hevnoraak. If you are ever to compare her to her sibling, ensure she is not within earshot, or you shall suffer a fate worse than death.
+
Konahrik
Their name means Warlord, for they are the most ferocious and feared of the Dragon Priests. Konahrik is not a person, but a title given to an elected Priest during times of war, and will be given absolute power over the land. It is a great honor to be named Konahrik, as only the most ruthless and cunning individuals may be chosen.
It's pretty obvious that Miraak doesn't like being told what to do. Even if it will benefit him as well, if you're telling him, there's a very low chance he'll actually do it. He's stubborn and fiercely independent like that.
However, his attitude will change completely if you were to show doubt in his abilities or call him a coward. At that point, he will go out of his way to accomplish whatever task it was simply out of spite.
If someone were to figure this out (like, say, a mischievous ldb), it would be fairly easy to get him to do whatever they wanted. He would eventually figure out what they were up to, of course, but that wouldn't stop him feeling compelled to prove their accusations wrong.
As a dragon priest, he had nothing less than the finest food and drink, and the best chefs around to prepare every single meal to his exact specifications. Now he's lucky if he can get a venison chop at an inn that isn't completely unseasoned or overcooked. And don't even get him started on the food (if you could call it that) when traveling on the road: dehydrated meat, stale alcohol and whatever prey they manage to catch that day.
But the absolute worst was the first time he tried to eat horker stew at an inn. The moment the blubbery meat touched his tongue he immediately gagged and refused to eat such a "foul" thing. LDB simply rolled their eyes and ate his helping along with their own. It would be quite a long time before he finally got over his "refined taste", as he calls it.
In Apocrypha, Miraak had nothing but time on his hands. When he wasn't busy reading or plotting his escape, he was sketching Seekers and dragons in one of his notebooks with a stick of charcoal. After quite a lot of practice, he eventually mastered the skill.
After escaping Apocrypha, he would struggle to accept that he was truly back in Mundus. Sketching would end up becoming something of a coping method for him, capturing the likeness of every living thing he possibly could until his hands were sore just as a way to ground himself in reality.
Important OTP Questions (Send a ship to my ask box and some numbers!)
1) Who rocks the Ferris Wheel seat and who flips out and begs them to stop?
2) Who is always horny and will have sex at any time, at any place and at any time?
3) Who is more into taking showers/baths together? Who tries to make it relaxing and who tries to make it sexy time?
4) Who likes to walk around the house naked and who tells the other to go put some clothes on?
5) Who sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight?
6) Who takes photos of the other while they sleep?
7) Who said “I love you” first? and who ends their arguments in a fight with “Because I love you”?
8) Who likes to wear the others sweatshirts?
9) Who wakes the other up in the middle of the night to tell them a cool dream they had? Who has the most nightmares, and who sings them back to sleep after?
10) Who is more likely to cheat?
11) Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship?
12) Who starts a food fight in the kitchen?
13) Who initiates duets? and who is the better singer?
14) Who starts the hand holding? Who grabs the others butt? Who slides their arm around their waist? Who likes to put their fingers in the belt loops?
15) Who likes writes the others name on their wrist?
16) Who is more seductive when they are drunk? and who is louder in bed?
17) Who is more protective?
18) Who talks to the other while they are sleeping?
19) Who drives and who has the window seat?
20) Who falls asleep in the others lap and who carries them to bed?
21) Who cuts the others hair?
22) Who is super bad at sexting? and who sends them encouraging messages throughout the day?
23) Who thinks they are not good enough for the others love? and who’s more afraid of loosing the other? Who thinks they keep messing up, only for the other to tell them they don’t need to worry?
24) Who starts random slow dancing with the other in the kitchen? Who holds the other just above the ground and kisses them?
25) Who says shitty puns and sex jokes just to see the other giggle and blush?
26) Who kissed first?
27) Who orders take out at two in a morning? and who wakes the other up at three in the morning to go downstairs with them to get a glass of water because it’s too dark?
28) Who writes poems/stories and love songs about the other? Do they sing the songs the write for them?
29) Who does some crazy stunt to try and impress the other and who ends up driving them to the emergency room after it backfires?
30) Who is embarrassed when they have to wear their glasses and who thinks they look super cute?
By the time Miraak finds it within himself to be open to having sex, he’ll more than likely be able to openly express affection. With that being said, he sees it of the utmost importance to be sure you’re alright after the deed is done. He’ll clean you up, use some light restoration spells if he was rough and most certainly cuddle up.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)
As crazy as it might sound, his favourite part of you is your throat. As a dragonborn, it’s almost a direct link to your power of the voice. Ergo, he loves to kiss your’s and so on. His favourite part of himself...hmmm...he likes his physical appearance well enough but if he had to pick an absolute favorite it’s likely his hands.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
He gets pretty damn messy. In addition to this, he enjoys cumming inside of his partner more than anything. Perhaps it’s a primal urge, whatever the reason is..all he knows is that he can’t help but be proud when he watches his spend drip from between your quivering legs.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He likes erotic literature and has on many occasions gotten himself off to the text and the fantasies the words invoke.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)
Before his seemingly eternal hold in Apocrypha, Miraak fancied himself getting into the beds of many women...and men...sometimes both...or many at all the same time. Come on, being a person in such high political power had its perks. Besides, it wasn’t like every night was all “sacrifice for the great dragonlords”. Plus, everyone thought it was fun getting to bed the famed “dovahkiin”.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Surprise surprise, he likes positions where he is allowed control. So positions like doggy style are right up his ally. However he also likes seeing your face sooooo, he loves having your legs up on his shoulders as he pounds into you in missionary. Don’t get me wrong though, he will still occasionally surrender control to his lover. In those times he prefers something sensual, like having his love sit on his lap.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Strangely enough, he’ll crack a couple wide quips here and there but for the most part he is determined and serious.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He’s an Atmoran man. They’re hairy. With that being said, he does still manage to keep things more “tamed” with the help of some wildly misused magic spells he learned. Also...yeah, the curtains match the drapes.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
At first he wasn’t into it as much, considering the whole act of sex itself to be “good enough”. However after maybe two sessions of you fucking, he quickly decides he favors the feeling of having your hands interlocked..kissing your beautiful face..so yes, he ends up becoming pretty damn intimate.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Usually he’ll just come to you if he has the urge...his time in Apocrypha however is a different story. He was bored okay? You try not being able to have proper sex with another human being for thousands of years.
He doesn’t care. Preferably the bedroom but honestly? You can say you want him to do you in the Solitude Castle Kitchen and he’ll just nod and drop the robes.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
It’s easy to get him going. Nothing quite does it like you kissing his neck though.
N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)
For the love of Akatosh, please don’t bind him in any way or bring up Hermaeus Mora.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
As mentioned before, he’s had some experiences so it’s fair to assume he’d be pretty good at giving oral. He much prefer hey his fingers involved too though. As far as preference goes...why not be fair and just do 69?
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
He tends to favor the rough pace.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He likes them a lot. Especially if the two of you are waking up from a night filled with the more sensual side of love making, he finds going at it hard and fast is a perfect way to start the morning.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He likes experimenting quite a bit. Just like I said, no binding.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Thanks to his Atmoran heritage and high libido, he has pretty decent stamina. It takes him a decent amount of time to blow and can easily go for 2-4 rounds.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Does using mild shock magic count?
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He’ll only do it if he knows that you can relieve your frustration sooner than later...but yes, he likes messing with you.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He’s a dovahkiin, of course he’s loud. He’ll groan, growl and even moan out sweet dovahzul praises followed by the desperate cry of your name.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
He sometimes uses his Dragon Aspect ability, and encourages you to follow suit, while in the throes of passion. He considers it as a way to reflect his soul to you, allow you to see every bit of him. It’s rather romantic.
X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)
He’s a big, and mean, BIG man. That Atmoran blood don’t produce no shrimps...you can take that however you like. Underneath those robes lay a nicely toned body covered in patches of light brown hair...but that not what you’re interested in. He’s decently girthy and comes in at a mind numbing 8.1 inches when fully erect.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
He likes to have sex and he likes to do it often. He may not be “addicted” but if you were to hint at wanting a round at any given time, there’s a high chance he’ll flash a bright grin and find somewhere private for the two of you to enjoy.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
It depends. If it’s one of those lovely romantic nights of long drawn out love making, he’ll happily fall right asleep so long as you are in his arms.
Miraak is simultaneously the smartest and the dumbest person you will ever meet. Like, he could recite every book in Apocrypha from memory alone, he could easily point out every single constellation and tell you its meaning, and winning a debate against him is borderline impossible cuz he'll always be able to outsmart any argument you bring up.
But at the same time the poor man doesn't have any practical skills like cooking or sewing, he almost completely lacks common sense, hell he barely even knows how to properly dress his damn self. He grew up with servants doing everything for him, so of course, why would he ever need to know any of that?
It sure is a harsh reality check when he returns to Tamriel 4000 years later with no more servants to take care of him. And ldb certainly isn't going to.
Miraak is simultaneously the smartest and the dumbest person you will ever meet. Like, he could recite every book in Apocrypha from memory alone, he could easily point out every single constellation and tell you its meaning, and winning a debate against him is borderline impossible cuz he'll always be able to outsmart any argument you bring up.
But at the same time the poor man doesn't have any practical skills like cooking or sewing, he almost completely lacks common sense, hell he barely even knows how to properly dress his damn self. He grew up with servants doing everything for him, so of course, why would he ever need to know any of that?
It sure is a harsh reality check when he returns to Tamriel 4000 years later with no more servants to take care of him. And ldb certainly isn't going to.
Other Names/Titles: Last Dragonborn/Laat Dovahkiin, Ysmir, Alduin's Bane, Ronaan (meaning "Archer" in Dovahzul), ex-Guildmaster, ex-Champion of Nocturnal, ex-Champion of Sanguine
Unless he has no factual evidence supporting him, Miraak has a terrible tendency to believe he is in the right. If not that, he believes that his horrible means are justifiable by the end. One could see how this would be an easy trait in someone to fight with.
Depending upon the severity of your scuffle, miraak would try his best to make amends- even if he thought he wasn’t wrong.
Don’t expect anything more than a half hearted apology so long as it was something not too major.
Don’t get me wrong, he doesn’t my really like seeing you upset- especially if it’s his fault, he just is no good at dealing with conflict that can’t be resolved with him using thu’um.
Because of your status as dragonborns and the natural dovah within you both, you can also expect for both of you to raise your voices a lot.
He’ll start small when trying to make things better. At first he may try to give you space, but if that is inaffective he’ll do his level best to worm his way back into your affections.
Be it giving you small flowers he foraged or gifting a beautiful diamond encrusted piece of apparel- material items tend to be his go to peace offering.
However he isn’t stupid, having read enough romance novels to know that sometimes a proper use of words could go further than any precious gemstone could.
If his attempts don’t work, he’ll become genuinely scared. The fear of losing your love and/or affection being a nightmare he never wants to live out. You were the only one that got through to him and..he really does love you back.
He internally beats himself up about whatever caused the fight, even on the rare occasion it wasn’t totally his fault.
No matter what, his last resort is to hold you in a heated embrace- baring his emotions on his sleeve and revealing just how sorry he could be.
