Heal yourself first.
The rest will come later 🌿

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Mike Driver
todays bird

JBB: An Artblog!
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
styofa doing anything

Kiana Khansmith
ojovivo
DEAR READER

tannertan36
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Peter Solarz

blake kathryn
trying on a metaphor
tumblr dot com
d e v o n

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
h
we're not kids anymore.

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@dragon-squared
Heal yourself first.
The rest will come later 🌿
I just want to hold your hand. Everything feels so heavy.
On Flying
So first you pick your poison. Maybe it’s one of those nice ointments, But if you aren’t fancy, Maybe it’s a wormwood tea, Or a mugwort tea, Or a mushroom tea if you’re kinky like that. And you drink it all at once. You set the cuckoo clock ticking. And with each tick-tock, You go down further into yourself Like a musket ball being rammed into a gun. And you think, “this is bullshit,” But you do it anyway And when the clock screams “cuckoo,” Your soul comes out of your mouth In the form of a crow And you fly to the West. Your arms - Your arms twitch in every world - flapping - And your beak - because you have a beak - Barrels through dirt. Earth upon earth, down and down, Dirt flying Until you reach the Underworld, Where the sun is ever-setting And the skies are gray And the heavens are dotted with the roots of trees, Which shine like stars.
The 20 year old child in me pleads “Protect me, please. Make me feel safe. I just want to be worthy of empathy, kindness and protection.”
The 11 year old adult in me explains “We can only depend on ourselves for protection & safety. Others are not to be trusted. The way to survive in this world is to be self-reliant.”
We have not found a compromise yet.
people are always like “are you a morning person or a night person” and I’m just like buddy I’m barely even a person
Acceptable things to say to someone regarding your mental illness:
- Thank you for supporting me
- I appreciate your existence in my life
- I love you
Unacceptable things to say to someone regarding your mental illness:
- I need you
- I’ll kill myself without you
- You’re the only thing that makes me happy
It’s okay to have a mental illness, but it is not okay to use your lack of emotional health as ammunition to manipulate people. That’s abuse. It is no one’s job to “fix you.” That’s your responsibility.
Don’t break up. Fix the problem. Start the romance again. Go on dates again. Work on winning each other over again. This is why there are so many failed relationships. If you love each other and are best friends then breaking up is not the answer.
Here is the best description of what derealization feels like for the people that have never experienced it
Its like when its late at night and you’re staring at the tv but you arnt actually paying attention
Its like when you are asleep and you can tell that you are dreaming
Its like standing in the shower not actually focusing on what you are doing and you just stare at the wall blankly
Its kind of like eaves dropping on yourself
Wanted to explain a bit because it can be so frustrating when i am completely disociating and people tell me to just snap back into it because they dont understand. Feel free to add more if ya want.
“You only have so much emotional energy each day. Don’t fight battles that don’t matter.”
— Unknown
I’m the type of person to give endless chances so if i give up on you just know it took a lot for me to do it
We miss you. This week already feels never ending...we can't wait for it to end..for next weekend to be here..
Sensory Processing Disorder
You may have heard around tumblr about Auditory Processing Disorder, a type of Sensory Processing Disorder. SPD means that a person experiences their senses differently than a neurotypical person. SPD can be part of Autism or ADHD or it can be a neurological disorder all on its own. SPD isn’t universally respected as a diagnosis by doctors who prefer to diagnose people as Autistic or just label them “picky” but I have SPD so let me tell you a bit about it.
Hypersensitive SPD
People who are hypersensitive experience their senses more intensely than someone who is neurotypical. Symptoms include
Feelings stressed or panicking while hearing loud noises or being under bright lights
Hating perfumes, the smell of food cooking, or other, even pleasurable, intense smells
Picky eating
Feeling itchy in clothes or under sheets others wouldn’t find scratchy
Focusing on background noises others don’t notice
Not enjoying being touched or not enjoying being touched in certain ways
Hyposensitive SPD
People who are hyposensitive experience their senses less intensely than someone who is neurotypical. Symptoms include
Fidgeting, getting sensory cravings, or “stimming”
Being very touchy and physically affectionate
Being bad at personal space
High pain tolerance
Thrill seeking behavior
Both types of SPD can “not know their own strength” and use inappropriate amounts of pressure on objects or people. Both can also have trouble hearing, hyposensitive people for obvious reasons but hypersensitive people because they can’t sort between the background noise and whatever their supposed to focus on. Both are also known for running into things and having poor balance.
Someone with SPD may be hyposensitive in some senses and hypersensitive in others. Someone can even show signs of both hyper and hypo sensitivity in a single sense. Experiencing too much or too little sensory stimulus can cause anyone to panic, but both are much easier states for someone with SPD to reach. Emotional reactions to too much or too little going can mean that people with SPD have to be particular about the places they go and things they do. SPD can affect a person’s life a little or a lot depending on the type they have and how intensely. Again, it isn’t universally recognized by doctors so the treatments can vary. Children will often go to a sort of sensory boot camp where they learn to manage their responses to different stimulus. For teens and adults, they usually take care of it themselves by managing their spaces and doing self care to not enter spaces or do things that will cause them to become over or underwhelmed.
i need someone to stay for once. i need someone to make me feel a little less disposable, a little easier to love, a little easier to want. i don’t want to be dependent on someone, but i want someone who makes life a little more enjoyable when i’m by their side. i want someone who i know will be beside me in struggle. i need someone i can count on, and i know i can count on myself so i hold people to the standards i hold myself to. i constantly find myself being let down and i just want things to be different for once. my heart is so full of love for all of the wrong people and i need someone to show me the silver lining to all of this.
when you’re dissociating and someone asks you a question
“i knew i wasn’t gonna find you so i gave up the dream and even though once, i thought i finally came close, i didn’t let the dream come back. you were best forgotten and anyway, i needed more room for the possible. i tried to laugh often and fill up the space around me so i wouldn’t notice what wasn’t there (any room you’re not in is empty as far as i’m concerned) but after a dream dies, there’s also the burial (and the haunting) and so a part of me was still waiting. i could feel it trying to bring me back to the impossibility of you but i couldn’t let that happen. and i promise not that long ago your arrival was a truth i believed in but every room i walked into was empty and you took your time and the shadows in my heart got bigger and bigger and then eventually they were all that was left. if i’m honest a part of me still hoped that maybe i was wrong and you were out there after all and maybe you were writing about the shadows, too but i inherited the homesick hearts of three generations of women who waited for something that almost belonged to them but never did and i couldn’t hold on to that. if i’ve failed you i’m sorry, but if i’m right about this you’re already on your way home to someone else. so i’m saying this here, now, so that i can let go. I forgive you for not knowing the way to me. I forgive every map that led you to a room i’d never walk into. I forgive you for every arrival somewhere else.”
— Y.Z, an honest letter to a forgotten dream
y’all make sure you date someone that cares about your mental health pls
fastball yatta! ⚾️