A Dragon’s Life

[dragonicecreamcone]

I put my self in situations where I always en up hurt. Why is that?

[dragonicecreamcone]

Outside today getting money. Delivering food and smoking... today is chill for me.

[dragonicecreamcone]

Okay so today has to be a new day for me. I can’t be held on him. I need to be good for myself... so her is to getting up out of bed and doing shit...

[dragonicecreamcone]

Slept for 4 hours. I’m not proud of that. Sister came home and woke me up. She is feeling down herself. I’m still in the clothes I was gonna go out in.. now she is gonna blast music....I don’t know I feel the need to post this. Right now I feel nothing...

[dragonicecreamcone]

Mom told me to go outside and work on myself. He is not gonna want me back if I’m the same hot mess... if I’m going to work on us and fix what I broke, she said I need to be a better person. How the heck am I going to do that? I tried to go outside today. I toke a shower did my hair and now I’m stuck in the house still...

[dragonicecreamcone]

Woke up and not feeling like doing anything. I don’t even want to watch tv. I just want a text from him.

[dragonicecreamcone]

Living with a sister who has emotions out of control is a plus to my life. I didn’t put her food in the microwave after getting my food heated up. I’m sorry. Well I’ve been told I say that a lot. I forgot to put it.

[dragonicecreamcone]

Reading my journal entries I did at the beginning of this month got me sorting things out. I am bad at communicating. That is somthing I lack in strongly. I suppress my feelings and wait until the last moment. I don’t share them. I just bury them and make them more dense until they can’t float. I hate it. I was always told not just stuff them down. But yet I still do. I’m learning. Figuring things out everyday. The things I always keep deep down come up in more ways that is not healthy and good for my life. I will change myself and get stronger starting by taking this step. First things first is how I should be getting started.

[dragonicecreamcone]

I hurt someone. I didn’t mean to. It’s a long story but I want him back. I feel hopeless. I have no friends and I to vent to this place. I feel like this a good place for a young person like me to just vent and not feel like I’m being a nuisance to others seeing it.