It's Xanax O'Clock

😌 it’s smooth brain hours 😌

[mail-me-a-snail]

he's free now

[okmdq]

i feel like i enjoy lana del rey a healthy amount. you know what i mean. she’s like the drunk aunt who will never listen to your advice about her life which she desperately needs but you still like hearing her wild stories at family get togethers. “i dated a coke dealer who took me to horse races” like cool aunt lana nobody asked

[wizardarchetypes]

please my friends are doing psychedelics and for whatever reason one of them asked me if I have anything to read and I checked my bag and all I have us Dante’s Inferno

[wizardarchetypes]

hey man looks like you’re enjoying your high. off topic but have you thought about hell lately and what it would be like to be there forever and ever and ever and

[ungezieferwerden]

they’re doing land acknowledgements at the pro genocide convention

[furryprovocateur]

you shittalked my partner one time so i’ve had one sided beef with you forever but now that we’re broken up i can say that you were in the right and have never been wrong in your life

why is this the actual funniest fucking message ive ever gotten

[epilepticsaints]

[thememedaddy]

[catchymemes]

[radiation]

Why the fuck did that stupid ass aqua color win the vote. I remember being so mad about it like it literally looked so close to the other light blue that was already in the game. I was a kid and blue was my favorite color in the world and even I was able to acknowledge that. But no I guess you just line up 3 colors and stupid children just vote for the one they like best in a vacuum instead of giving an ounce of a fuck about the greater implications and impact of their decision.

[coughloop]

Ever since I was a little girl I always wanted to get hit by a car in a way that would make me a lot of money

[april]

cats are really good at looking at things. very useful

[april]

having two cats essentially means you have a bug and rodent triangulation system. if they are both looking at something you know for damn sure there is some unauthorised fucking thing there.

[jessebloom]

this is the most represented i’ve ever felt by chapelle roan. i get it now.

[falseknees]

Loonacy Prints / Patreon

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

when he says "warm touching warm... reaching out... touching me, touching you" in sweet caroline. that's some shit koko the gorilla would say in sign language

[whimsicallywiddershins]

Hoid is literally the bard of a DnD party that got in way over their heads and killed God. And now he is stuck trying to clean up the mess

[uhlexuhhh]

a canon event for every oldest daughter is being told “you would be a good lawyer”

[novalumineux]

This is how my brain works constantly-

Credit To: Yungcrxtia on TikTok!