Dungeons And Dreadful Players

3 nerds, a Dungeon Master and a fuck tonne of chaos - Submissions Welcome ❤️

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"Fuck you, I'm going to lay down in this bed and touch myself for spiritual healing."

-Our paladin using lay on hands

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I make a small fart sound behind the threatening figure

The bard casting Thaumaturgy

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I play a slow Thomas the Tank Engine that as it speeds up it drifts into Megalovania

The bard playing for a tavern

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Right take Peter Pan, Make him gay - And 6ft3

Our Ranger describing his characters appearance 

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You feel a clammy sweaty hand touch you from the darkness, and it feels comforting

Our Paladin touching our bard in order to cast a protecting spell

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He sees you with your bagpipes and things "yeah, he looks tasty"

Our DM, letting us know who the spider was about to attack

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You thought I had screamed my loudest before, but the power of these bagpipes inspire me

Our Barbarian after the Bard had cast Bardic Insperation 

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Because he furiously played the bagpipes before your badger fell asleep, you begin to connect the dots

Our Wizard, slowly realizing the bard had cast Sleep

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Wizard: I can't believe you put my badger to sleep!

Bard: Hey, at least I only put him to sleep, not...*to sleep*!

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I need my magic sack

Our Bard, talking about his bagpipes

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We laugh at the concept of communism

Player after the DM insisting that communism does not exist in this universe

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Good News: We are starting a new campaign!

Bad News: We refered to our DM as our “Daddy Master” and his (in the photo above) shows how ready he is for this!

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“His blood is in my blood!”

- A very upset NPC who got impaled Kebab style with another man (Submission by I-piss-blood)

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DM: How many Charaters do you have that have living parents?

*silent counting*

Player: I have 2!

DM: Out of?

Player:...33

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Player: I’m gonna create a new character!

Dm: Will this ones parents die?

Player: Yes they will.

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I scream like a little girl

Our 6ft5, incredibly muscular, barbarian half orc

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Oh Y'know, just, cat scratches

Our Half orc whilst bleeding from a massive sword wound in his side