even though it’s a joke , alex doesn’t want to take any chances . he doesn’t know amelia’s addiction , he hasn’t really seen it first hand ——— but if he just found out he has an inoperable tumor and he was an addict , he might fall off of the wagon . if she isn’t gonna tell hunt , then alex can at least make sure she’s okay for the night / maybe even try and talk this out with her ,, ❝ yeah —— yeah , i think i can do that , ❞ he says with an unusual softness . amelia can have whatever she wants right now —— how could he deny her anything ? people had to know eventually , and he’d have to talk her into telling them . she needs a support system . but for tonight , he’s going to do whatever she wants . once they’re in the car , it’s a silent ride back to meredith’s house . an uncomfortable silence / alex tries not to look at her too much with the same fear in his eyes as before . inside the house , the entire place is dark as he drops his keys on the end table before meeting amelia’s gaze in the darkness , ❝ this is really shitty . and i know you don’t wanna think about it , and i know you’re scared and you have every right to be , ❞ he’s braver when he’s drunk , talking about heavy subjects has never been the easiest thing for him , ❝ so if you need to freak out / i’m here . okay ? you don’t have to freak out alone . come on …. let’s go upstairs , ❞ he extends his hand , waiting for her to take it before leading her up the stairs and into his room .
a part of her knows she should tell owen first , her husband , not the guy she’s having this affair with but if she’s being honest with herself , she likes alex a whole lot more anyway . ❝ good , ❞ it’s the last words spoken between them as she hazily leads her way toward the car and gets in the drivers seat . as soon as she starts it the music is instantly shut off , and she drives in silence . it’s as if she’s mad at him or something when it reality she’s just mad at the word . finally when they get to the house does amelia crack even a small smile , at least she’ll get to relax for even five minutes . his voice catches her off guard when she’s kicking her boots off , and she forces a shrug . what else can she do . ❝ i know you’re here / you always are . ❞ with that she reaches forward , taking his hand in silence until they get to his room . glancing around she smiles softly before dropping his hand and crawling on the bed without even a thought , at this point she didn’t usually have one , she was in here most nights as it was . it was practically half her bed at this point . ❝ the only other person who i’d trust to operate on me is dead , so — i guess i’m screwed . ❞ and then the tears really start . ❝ wonder what’ll go first – hope not my vision , i’d like to see for a while at least . wouldn’t mind getting some memory loss though , honestly . ❞
