Silence, though it was something that provided him comfort, right now, as he waited for Haru to say something, only caused tension to mount. And as if his thoughts were taken into consideration, cutting through the silence was a heartbeat ringing so clear and loud that it took over his headspace until it was all he could hear. It didn't help though, to hear that sound now when he hadn't for so many years, but in a way it was good too, they were here and he hoped with everything that it was a live one not something undead like his. It seemed fair to be hit back with anger, it was something he knew so well, something he could take so well, take it and let it burrow deep, but more importantly their anger was deserved because Haru was right, Ken clearly did not look long enough, not hard enough, he wasn't persistent nor steadfast, so yes, anger felt fair, it was justified, he deserved worse than that.
Eyes flashed in Haru's direction when they spoke again, mouth opening yet no words seemed to follow through. How could he explain this situation? He didn't lie on principle, he definitely couldn't lie to Haru, but how does one even begin to explain this? He exhaled heavy trying to form the right words, he had never been one to mince words either, direct and blunt was how he chose to operate but that couldn't be applied to this situation, "I- had to leave due to circumstances. Ended up here. It's complicated." He settled for that, for now at least, "A lot happened. I know that's a shit explanation but it's all I can offer you right now. But I didn't know you kept tabs on me till New York, why didn't you reach out?" Could things have gone differently if he knew Haru was looking for him? Could he have still be alive? Threads of fate woven differently to keep him alive, to keep him human still? No that was foolish thinking, they would've gotten Haru too, and it'd be his fault.
Sharp words and sharper looks paused Ken in thought as he watched Haru, what they had said hitting deeper than expected. Blinking back to the moment, Ken nodded, "You're right. I suppose we're not kids anymore." The response fell quiet and low, carrying too much emotion yet showing very little of it as he tried to reign it back. Even now, even in this moment of their reunion, their parents teachings still echoed in his head as he fought to grip his emotions back. He wished it was different, wished that they could be kids again, but it was foolish. While time paused for him, he couldn't turn it back. "I missed a lot of your life, didn't I?" But he didn't dwell on that, he couldn't. "I'm alone," he answered, forcing focus to shift yet again but when Haru questioned again, Ken naturally fell silent until to explain. "I was only looking out," he said when they picked up the lighter.Taking it, he twirled it between his fingers absent mindedly before tucking it back into his pocket without more comments.
An expected huff of a laugh sounding at what he was asked, "Safe is an interesting word. I'm fine. How long have you been in town? Who have you met? You deserve an explanation, you do, I'm not stalling, promise. I just… it's a fucking lot if I'm being honest. Do you live close to here?" Where did they even live? How did they find this place? The more he asked, more questions piled into his head. "We should head somewhere private." Not that he was worried about people overhearing him talking about the true nature of this town, folks would hardly bat an eye, still, he felt this should be done less openly. "Or we can even go sit in my car, it's close by."