Long Lost Friends @Cook
Effy walked down the street, smoking a fag as she headed toward the pub. This place was her stomping ground in Bristol, she had been well known here when she was in her heavy party days. She had spent more time drinking at this pub alone than she had at her flat. She hadn’t seen anyone that she used to know, but then again she had been spending most of her time at the strip club on the far side of town. Ever since she started working as a barmaid there she had been spending less time in her usual neighborhood and more time around the club just because she was always there. Although it wasn’t her favorite place to be, it was different and Effy always needed something different. Things became too routine and she would fall back into old routines and her thinking would get dark again. She shook off the thoughts, focusing on the pub which was coming into view. She finished the last of her fag before throwing it on the ground and stomping it out. She stood outside the pub for a second staring at the door. She had made so many memories here, some harder to remember than others. She sighed at the thought and walked in. It was late in the afternoon, so there wasn’t a huge crowd, but people were definitely in there. Nobody Effy recognized, but people around her age maybe a little older. She headed to bar and sat down on a stool. “Can I get three shots of Longshore?” She said putting down some wrinkled up cash she pulled out her pockets. The barman smiled at her and grabbed the money quickly. She hadn’t recognized him, but he smiled like he knew her. She politely smiled back before going back to her normal stone cold face.
He brought the shots over and she took them back to back to back. “Woah there.” He said as he apparently watched her. She hadn’t noticed, she was just trying to get fucked. “One more from you?” She said smiling a better more devilish smile. He nodded and brought her another one which she downed even faster than the first. She was starting to get drunk, but not quick enough. “What’s the deal love?” He said leaning on the bar. “Something happen?” She laughed. “Yeah it’s called being sober.” He laughed also and brought her another shot, and one for himself. “Here’s to that.” They clinked shot glasses and downed the last shot. She talked to him for a little bit about the weather and business at the pub until she felt good enough. “I’m gonna step outside for a smoke real quick.” She said, “I’ll be right back.” She headed toward the door and opened it feeling the cool air hit her face. She did head out for smoke, but not a fag. She needed a spliff, which she happened to have in her bag. She pulled it out and put it in between her lips before taking out the lighter and lighting it. She inhaled deeply and looked up when she saw a familiar looking face. “No fucking way.” She said as she saw Cook walking toward the pub. “For fucks sake.” She said with a big smile much louder as he approached the pub. “Now what in the fuck are you doing here?” She said. She put the spliff back in between her lips and inhaled again. “I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again.” She said more softly. She stuck out her hand, offering him the spliff. “Missed you.” She said with her typical Effy smile sprawled across her face.
Cook had spent a decent amount of time making cash on the side doing odd jobs. Half the time he would Uber people around London. It was easier than the drug trade. Plus, he got a better tip when he mentioned where they could find good drugs. Tonight was his day off and he was making it for himself. No Liv. She probably didn’t want to see him anyway. Cook popped on a decent looking shirt, slacks, shoes, and slipped a hat on his head. He pulled on his jacket and headed out to the street. The usual pubs weren’t cutting it for him. Cook wanted to see people, make friends, or meet girls. He also wanted to enjoy a decent beer without having to spend a fortune. Bristol had those kinds of places all over. Cook knew the best spot too. He hadn’t been there in ages and he knew one of the bartenders. That meant free drinks for any girl that he decided he would try for.
He popped a cigarette between his lips and lit it for his walk. A fresh pack made him happy, along with a new wallet full of cash. Things were looking up. A new life led to new choices. Cook didn’t think he would ever have a second chance on life, but he was lucky enough to get handed one. Yes, it took a lot of money but it was worth it. “No fucking way.” Cook glanced up and knit his brows. He couldn’t see much beside a figure walking toward him. His finished cigarette was flicked and a large grin appeared on his face. “Effy?” Not once did he expect to see her here. Cook didn’t know she was back in Bristol. Hell, he didn’t know much about the place since he spent more time outside of it.
She offered him a smoke and he nodded as he took the spliff from her fingers to his. “Didn’ know if I’d see you again neither…” He knew there was a lot in the past they didn’t talk about. Cook disappeared. Freddie too. He didn’t have any excuse. She was left alone to figure it out. Cook didn’t know what else to say but one word. “Sorry.” He spat it out without thinking. He handed the spliff back to her and put his hands in his pockets. “Look… I-uh, I owe ya somethin’. Lemme get ya a drink. Inside’a course.”
Effy was so happy to see Cook that she didn’t even think about the last time she had seen him. As soon as he said sorry all the memories flooded back in her mind and she was angry. She was angry, hurt and confused. She was upset about not only him being gone for so long and not explaining, but also Freddie. She could barely think about Freddie without wanting to scream and punch the wall. The smile that was across her face instantly fell at the sound of his voice, and she gritted her teeth. As happy she was to see him, the memories of all the bullshit she went through when he left flooded her brain and made her enraged. She grabbed the spliff from his hands and put it out on the wall behind her, and shoved it back in her bag.
She had never felt two intense emotions back to back like this. She went from happy and nostalgic to angry and bitter. She didn’t know anything about what happened to Cook and Freddie, but she assumed they ran off together. They decided Effy wasn’t important anymore and chose each other. After all the three of them had been through for both of them to completely desert her with no explanation, she felt like she might as well have been nobody to either of them. She didn’t know what she was going to say when she saw Freddie- but she assumed it would be around the same thing she was about to tell Cook.
“I bet you’re fucking sorry.” She said. “You showed that by the way you fucked off and never told me why.” She said a little louder. She wasn’t so much as angry but disappointed. “You and fucking Freddie.” While in the end, she chose Freddie- she had so much love in her heart for Cook. She respected him but after shit hit the fan he just left without a word, as did Freddie. “You do owe me something. A fucking explanation.” She said tilting her head and crossing her arms. She shook her head. “And you owe me a fucking drink too.” She said because she wasn’t about to turn down a drink. “I have a lot of questions that I want answered.” She said opening the door to the pub, starting inside waiting for him to follow her.
“I bet you’re fucking sorry. You showed that by the way you fucked off and never told me why.” Okay, maybe a drink wasn’t going to happen. He swallowed and she was louder blurting Freddie’s name. Cook wasn’t exactly sure where the hell he was. All he knew was that he was okay. He had always figured that he would come back to Bristol, but the family fled. “You do owe me something. A fucking explanation.” There was more anger in her voice and Cook nodded. He’d tell her some of the truth. Not really what happened. They walked into the pub and he stayed a pace behind her. There was a spot in the back. A small booth that they could fit in. “I’ll get the drinks. You get the table.” He half mumbled and headed to the bar. His heart was pounding. At least he knew that he couldn’t get in trouble for any of it. Connor got him off free. It was that easy.” He looked back at Effy and realized he didn’t ask her what she wanted. He decided on a shot of cheap vodka and two pints of beer. Cook walked over with his hands full and set the shots down, then the beers.
He took the spot across from her and immediately grabbed the shot and downed it. Cook chased it with the beer. He cleared his throat. She said she had questions but Cook didn’t know where to start. The obvious question was why he fucked off. Well, it was a lot to say. “Look… I know yer mad, but ya gotta let me finish me answers to yer questions, right?” He looked at her with sincere eyes. “Yer right. Ya gotta know what’appened after all this time. Shit’s fucked basically. Well… it was.” Cook drank from his beer rather quickly and set the glass down next to him. “Dunno where ya want me ta start. Ask what ya wanna know… but ya gotta… ya gotta be calm’bout all’a it okay?”
She walked quickly and heavily into the pub and looked around. She wanted to make sure nobody had heard her yelling outside. She didn’t care about making a scene, but at the same time she didn’t want to get Cook or Freddie in trouble. No matter how mad she was at the both of them, she didn’t want them in jail or dead. She assumed they ran because they did something criminal, why else would they both leave without telling anybody where they were going? She couldn’t even get in touch with Karen, Freddie’s sister. Wherever they were, they didn’t want to be found. It’s ironic that after all this time trying to find Freddie or Cook, she stumbled upon Cook in a pub they used to frequent back in college.
She glared at him, but did as he asked and went and sat down at the booth. She put her bag down next to her and ruffled her hair with her fingers. She was slightly anxious, she had waited so long to know what had happened to Cook and Freddie. She didn’t even know if they were alive and today she sees Cook walking down the fucking street. He came back with drinks and a shot, she assumed the shot was for her- but he downed it as soon as he sat down and she scoffed. “Where the fuck do I even begin?” She said tilting her head and moving her face closer to his.
“This is about as calm as I’m going to get.” She said. She really wasn’t being obnoxious, she was just very angry. She could even contain herself enough to unclench her fists. She tried to calm herself down a little bit by chugging her pint, but it didn’t do much for her. She looked at him directly in his eyes. She had composed herself enough to narrow her questions down. “I have three important questions.” She said sternly. “One, Where did you go? Two, What did you do that made you go? Three, Did it have to do with me?” She asked these questions slowly as if that would make him answering them any easier. “Fucking bonus round.” She said a little louder with a fake laugh. “Where the fuck is Freddie?” She said with grit and disdain.
“Where the fuck do I even begin?” Cook sat quietly and waited for the “This is about as calm as I’m going to get.” Got it. “I have three important questions. One, Where did you go? Two, What did you do that made you go? Three, Did it have to do with me?” He swallowed and waited, she didn’t seem to be done talking. “Fucking bonus round. Where the fuck is Freddie?” It was one thing that he didn’t know. He took a sip of his beer before leaning onto the table and sighing. “I went to Manchester… I went’round everywhere actu’lly, but, Manchester was the end.” Cook rubbed his neck and cleared his throat. “‘member Foster?” He lifted his brows and rubbed the side of his arm. “Well… ‘e’ad Freddie. Like ‘ad him… was gonna ‘urt ‘im. So… I fucked’im up.”
Cook decided to leave out the murder. It wasn’t a good place to do so. Plus, none of it mattered. “Freds was there cos of you… I didn’ ‘urt the guy cos of you.” He cleared his throat again and grabbed his beer. “I dunno where Freds is… I know ‘e was okay. His family moved… with’im.” Cook set his glass down and kept himself quiet. “I called the ambulance before I skipped out… I mean… I didn’ave much goin’ fer me at the time. I skipped out on jail… I fucked up with me mum, no home, no mates really… so I left. I jus’ yunno… fucked off.” Cook rubbed his face and sniffed. “No’ne knows where Foster is.” Well, Cook knew where he was buried. “Is that all ya needa know?” He looked at her with a beaten down face. Cook wasn’t too happy to have to re-live the damnedist of memories.
She could tell that Cook was nervous, which was something she had rarely seen out of him. She could tell he didn’t wanna talk about this, but Effy needed answers. She had held in all of her emotions about this for too long. Intstead of just losing her shit on Cook, she was surprised she could just ask questions like everything was fine. She listened to him talk about where he went, Manchester of all places. “Wow.” She said softly under her breath. She was a little surprised, she thought maybe he went to the states or something of that sort. As soon as he mentioned Foster, Effy’s blood ran cold. “F-Foster?” She said stuttering a bit biting her lip. If Effy never heard that name again, it would be too soon. Effy has still not recovered from the trauma that Foster put her through. She hadn’t seen him since she left the hospital, he had disappeared which was good for him for the way he manipulated her. She shuddered at the memories. The next thing he said, really took her aback. She couldn’t help it, but her jaw dropped. “He had Freds?” She said putting her elbows up on the table, running her hands through her hair. Effy was completely shaken up, she didn’t know what to do. “You stopped him?” Effy said, still in shock. She was so confused, why would Foster hurt try to hurt Freddie? What did he gain from any of this?
She continued to listen to him, hanging off of every word he said trying her best to calm down. But she felt it in her stomach, she thought she was going to be sick. She grabbed her drink and started drinking again but faster this time until the drink was completely gone. “How have you not been arrested?” She said looking around as if an officer was going to pop out any second and arrest him. Obviously this wasn’t going to happen because he was walking around in the middle of day and he wasn’t scared to be seen. “And Freddie just left? Didn’t tell you anything?” She said leaning in closer as if that would help him to suddenly know where Freddie and his family were. If Freddie didn’t tell Cook of all people, he wouldn’t have told anybody. They were like brothers, basically grew up together. She was shaking, she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Why didn’t you or Freddie tell me?” She said feeling more vulnerable. She was honestly hurt that it took this long for her to find out what had happened to the both of them. “I’m going to get two more pints.” She said running her fingers through her hair standing up quickly. She walked intensely over to the bar and put down money. “Two pints.” She said biting her thumb still reeling over what she had just been told. She grabbed the pints and walked over to Cook as quickly as possible. She put the drinks down, her hands were trembling. She tilted her head back closing her eyes, she couldn’t imagine what the two of them had been through and all because she went psycho. “I’m glad you’re alright.” She said putting her head between her hands. She couldn’t even look up at him, she knew her face gave away every emotion she was feeling.
“How have you not been arrested?” She wasn’t taking any of it well and Cook hadn’t expected her to anyway. Each answer gave her more questions. “And Freddie just left? Didn’t tell you anything?” Cook licked his lips… “Why didn’t you or Freddie tell me?” He sniffed and didn’t get a chance to answer before she was grabbing another two pints. Cook had finished his off. His hands dragged on his face so he could clear his head. Cook was doing well so far. She didn’t know that Foster was long gone, but now she had to know that Cook left Freddie before the ambulance came around. She returned in no time and definitely had full on shock pasted on her face. “I’m always fine… but… we didn’ tell ya cos… well I left before they came for’im. I couldn’t stick’round. Would’a been picked up. Ran off. Listened for sirens.” Cook grabbed a new pint and started to drink it until he needed air.
“I tried lookin’ to see where’e went… saw his pop sellin’ the house. Couldn’t ask where…” Cook shrugged lazily. He felt sad knowing that Freddie was out there, but then again… wherever they left off, it wasn’t on good terms. Everything was beyond fucked up and Cook realized a few things about himself. “Look… I know ya got questions, but it’s in the past. I’m good now… I mean it. No cuffs. No nothin’. It’s all in the past. I met this lad that could do me a favor for some money.” He rubbed his neck and grew even more quiet as he spoke. “Wiped my record. James Cook is a free man.” Cook knew he could somehow ask Connor for more information, but he definitely needed more money. “He could find out where Freds is yunno? He just needs cash.” Which he didn’t have much of at the moment. “I can give ya the guy’s contact, but it’s a deep knit group. Nothin’ you wanna be involved in.
Effy knew she hadn’t really given him a chance to answer any of her questions. She continued drinking her pint until she could feel it all sitting in her stomach. She listened to him continue to talk, thinking there was probably more to the story than Cook was letting on. But she decided not to push anymore, he had been in this mess because of her and Freddie in the first place. She put her drink down when he stopped talking. “You left him? Was he at least okay and conscious when you left?” She said biting her nails. Effy hadn’t bit her nails since she was in primary school, but she couldn’t get rid of these jitters. She felt like she was responsible for all of this happening. Freddie being taken, Cook being forced to attack Foster and both of them having to leave Bristol. She continued to drink, getting significantly drunker with every sip. She wasn’t incoherent though, she could understand every word he was saying and could form her own proper sentences. “I just- I dont even..” She tried to say what she was feeling but she really couldn’t. She felt like complete shit and now she knew that she really had run Freddie off like she had thought she did. Just not exactly in the way she expected.
Effy listened to him again, still sipping on her drink but slower. She didn’t want to forget anything he was telling her. She listened to him speak about Freddie and his family moving. She felt calmer, more at peace knowing he was with his family when he took off. She was more at ease knowing that they were both okay, at least as far as she could tell Freddie was. She relaxed a little bit, pushing her pint slightly away from her hand. “Never thought I’d see the day James Cook had a clear record.” She said with a short-lived smile. She truly believed that Cook would have been in jail by now, or at least out on bail or some shit like that. She was pleasantly surprised that he had gotten out of the shit he had put himself into. Even if it wasn’t in the traditional way, he still managed to get himself to a better place and she respected that. Her eyes lit up at the mention of finding out where Freddie is. “Are you taking the piss?” She said putting both elbows back on the table. “Don’t fuck with me.” She said concerned. She didn’t want to get her hopes up to be let down again. “I have cash, but..” She started to say. “Do you honestly think Freddie would want to hear from me?” She said. “I mean it’s my fault all of this happened right?” She said picking her drink back up taking a swig. “I want his contact, just in case Freddie gives me a chance to see him again.” She said sort of quietly.
Had they met on different circumstances, Cook could see this ending differently. No public reaction like he had though. No screaming. No fighting. They felt like true adults discussing the past. Not like it was a happy story. He could see it in her face. Those same thought lines appearing on her head and creasing at her lips. She was worried. Cook knew that look. It hit him like a ton of bricks. “Never thought I’d see the day James Cook had a clear record.” She laughed. Cook figured some of it was fake. She was just trying to lighten the mood. After a bit more discussion, Cook was asked a question that he couldn’t exactly answer. “Do you honestly think Freddie would want to hear from me?” He stayed quiet. “I mean it’s my fault all of this happened right?” He looked at her and shook his head. Being mentally ill wasn’t her fault. Effy mentioned wanting the contact. He would send her the number later.
“I’m tryin’ ta think what he would feel if he saw you… I… I dunno.” Cook figured Effy and him would’ve had some sort of brawl in the street. That or a hug that could last longer than a month. “He loved ya.” Cook dropped his gaze to his drink. “But that was ages ago. Things change. I dunno’ow good’e is.” His mind was empty about what happened after he split. Freddie being brain dead. Freddie never speaking or moving again. He never thought of any consequence. Cook pushed everything so far down in the back of his mind, it wasn’t a deep thought any longer. “He’d prolly be happy.” If he was right in the head. “Then sad.” Cook picked up his drink and took a long sip. The beer was refreshing. He hadn’t expected another so soon either. Effy was still drinking heavily.
“Yunno he’d never blame ya for any’a this. Just like I don’t. Shit’appens. None’a what’appened matters no more. It’s gone now. Poof. We got now ta live for, right? So if he thinks like me, he’d be’appy. He’d tell ya what’appened. He’d enjoy a pint with ya and end as mates should.” Cook lifted his glass and held it out toward her. “Would ya drink ta that?”
Effy could tell by Cook's reaction that Freddie either didn't want to hear from her, or Cook didn't know how Freddie would react. She didn't know what to think, and what action to take. Something inside her was telling her that Cook coming here at the same time as her was a sign that she needed to see Freddie too. But at the same time, what if this was a warning? She shook the thoughts out, trying not to delve too deep into the situation. It was over now, there was nothing anybody could do to change it. If Freddie was living a better life in a different place than she was happy for him. He shook his head at her comment and she shrugged. She did believe it was her fault, but she wouldn't dwell on it. She didn't want him to forget to send her the contact information, and she didn't know if he still had her number. She grabbed a napkin from the end of the table and a pen from her purse. She quickly wrote her info down and shoved it at him. "I'm assuming you lost this." She said putting away the pen. "If you didn't than you can give your friend this." She said knowing he probably didn't want to be in touch with this person any more than he had to.
He didn't know how Freddie would feel if he saw her, and how could he? He wasn't a mind reader and he hadn't seen him in years. "How did you feel when you saw me?" She said curiously. She didn't know if he blamed her or if he even thought about her at all anymore. She had felt so close to him at one point in her life and right now they felt like they were strangers just getting to know each other again. "He did love me." She said quietly. She knew that was true, but how he feels about her now? That was a complete mystery, and Effy loved to solve mysteries. "I hope he'd be happy. I was happy to see you, and I'd be just as happy to see him." She said. Truth be told, she didn't think about any of the past when she looked at Cook now she only saw his future and she believe it to be bright.
Effy had taken a small break on drinking and when she realized that she started sipping on her pint more heavily. She didn't want it to go to waste. She listened to him speak again, feeling nostalgic at the way his spoke. "You may not blame me, but I'm still the source of it all." She said shrugging. "I should've done something different." She said knowing there wasn't much she could've done different. Maybe looked harder for either one of them? Kept Freddie away from Foster? She smiled at Cook and knocked her drink into his pretty forcefully. "Fuckin' right I would." She said chugging her pint until it was close to empty. She laughed and pointed at him. "You always knew how to get people worked up." She said and she meant it in a good way.
