INFJs - Learn to take better care of yourselves (part 9)
Covid-19 as a “meditatio mortis”
I’ve noticed that many INFJs tend to develop some sort of “morbid obsession” with death. Not that we’re afraid of it, quite the opposite: I think we find the thought of death intriguing. Maybe it’s because of the impact it has on every aspect of our lives (if we were immortal, our existence would have a pretty different meaning to us), or perhaps it’s just the sheer mystery of this inevitable transition what fascinates us so much.
I could probably talk for hours about this topic, and I’m sure I’ll mention it in some other posts, in the future. Today, I want to talk to you about this particular aspect of death, or rather, of our relationship with death. Roman philosopher Seneca called it “meditatio mortis” (meditation upon death) in a letter addressed to his pupil, Lucilio. Lucilio asked Seneca how to overcome the fear of death and the wise philosopher suggested to look around and acknowledge that death is everywhere, all around us, all the time. Once we realise how omnipresent death is, and we slowly get acquainted to it, we start to get rid of our fear of death and accept its inevitability.
I think Letters to Lucilio, but in particular this letter, was one of the most influential reads in my teen years. Since I was sixteen (or less, probably) I’ve been thinking about death almost every single day, and I feel that was one of the most important practices in my spiritual journey. Most people are afraid of death to the point that they don’t even want to think about the day their body will stop functioning. If they hear someone talking about it, the’ll quickly tell them to shut up. I can’t help thinking these people are doing such a great disservice to themselves, but of course I can’t force them out of their comfort zone. So today I’d like to just write a few paragraphs on this particular practice and, if it’s your cup of tea, invite you to try it out yourself.
Now, one of the false prejudices one may have on the practice of meditatio mortis is that it will make you suicidal or paranoid, which couldn’t be further from the truth. In fact, meditating upon your own death is remarkably effective when it comes to appreciating the value of your life. This meditation doesn’t stimulate nihilistic thoughts, on the contrary: it might, at the beginning, especially if you’re dealing with a tough phase of your existence; but if you go beyond those first, instinctive, superficial thoughts, and ask yourself: “and then what?”, the game will start changing completely.
From an INFJ’s perspective, the “after” is incredibly fascinating and intriguing; and meditating upon it is extremely helpful and important for those who want to embrace the spiritual part of life. A part that many people neglect (too focused on present necessities and desires), and yet it’s so important. Because only those who invest their time in acknowledging and nurturing that part of life can hope to relieve themselves of fear, anger, and desperation.
Since this new coronavirus epidemic started in my country, I’ve seen, heard, and felt so many of those negative emotions all around me. Which was to be expected, because now all those people who used to peacefully carry on with their lives, wilfully ignoring that death is among us all the time, are now forced to confront the truth. An unpleasant experience fo them, more so because of the social distancing. I can only hope they will learn something from this unsettling feeling, but I’m keeping this issue for another post. Now, I want to talk about the surprise I see on their faces (sometimes mixed with reassurance, other times with indignation) when they notice I’m unafraid.
What they experience as a torture, for me (and many other INFJs, I guess) is just ordinary life, almost: I’ve learned how to live on my own long ago; I’m used to thinking about death every day; I’ve acknowledged and accepted my life could end anytime or I could lose everything I own, health included. Every so often, I still get anxious though, and that’s why meditatio mortis is more of a journey rather than an achievement.
A life-long journey through the unknown that lurks behind every corner of reality. A daily practice to appreciate the value of life, to learn how to give meaning to our existence, to be free of fear and sadness, to know ourselves better, and to kick-start or boost our spiritual awakening.
What better time than this to try out the practice of meditatio mortis or help the people around us, those who were unprepared for this epidemic, deal with it as best as they can?
More self-care tips for INFJs