[eleven-fiftynine]

Change can be scary, even painful, and many of you simply won’t change until the pain of where you are now exceeds the pain of change.

Baby Steps Millionaires by Dave Ramsey

[eleven-fiftynine]

“The minute you think of yourself as a victim, you’ve given control of your life to somebody else. And you might not be able to control your circumstances, but you can control your response to your circumstances, so don’t you ever think of yourself as a victim.”

- Condoleezza Rice

Baby Steps Millionaires by Dave Ramsey

[eleven-fiftynine]

What of my anger? For so many years, I had thought I deserved it. I thought I was a sinner. I thought it was my fault that I was beaten. It was not my fault. Men wielded their power over me because it made them feel big, when I was so small. That was their choice, not mine.

The Night Prince by Lauren Palphreyman

[eleven-fiftynine]

“Who controls you? Who would I find, if I climbed to the top, I wonder? Your father? Brother? Callum? Me? Perhaps your mother, or something more abstract—like duty, or honor. Has it ever occurred to you that you are the one pulling the strings? That you are binding yourself? That you could break free, if you wished it?” He drums his fingers along the arm of the throne. “Probably not.”

The Night Prince by Lauren Palphreymam

[eleven-fiftynine]

I once told myself a story that went like this: I would never be lovable, be accepted, or belong as who I was because my full self wasn’t enough.

And I rewrote it.

My new story goes like this: I am a person who is innately lovable, who is inherently acceptable, and who deeply belongs to myself and therefore to the world. I am enough, just as I am.

Already Enough by Lisa Olivera

[eleven-fiftynine]

The hard truth is this: healing—of any kind—doesn’t happen overnight. It is not a one-time-only experience, it isn’t linear, and it isn’t something we ever totally finish. Healing doesn’t mean fixing, forgetting, erasing, or undoing. Healing means integrating the painful pieces of our story so we can become more whole, so we can become our full selves. It means allowing ourselves to carry our story without being carried by it.

Already Enough by Lisa Olivera

Start reading this book for free: https://a.co/08BHSmpY

[eleven-fiftynine]

“How do you help patients who come to you with addictions or even compulsions around other habits?”

“My main advice is to make a big change,” he said. “Change your circle. Go to school. Educate yourself. Get a job or change your job. Take courses to improve your skills. Learn to read and pour yourself into books. Actively go out and make friends or change your friend group. Make big changes.” Embrace short-term discomfort to find a long-term benefit.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

In the human brain less equals bad, worse, unproductive. More equals good, better, productive. Our scarcity brain defaults to more and rarely considers less. And when we do consider less, we often think it sucks.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

William James, born in 1842, is considered the father of American psychology. His ideas laid the foundation of modern psychological thinking. James captured something profound about this brief stint of consciousness we all have and call life. In the end, he said, our life is ultimately a collection of what we pay attention to.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

Once we know something is pleasurable or rewarding, dopamine is primarily released when we’re pursuing and anticipating receiving that pleasurable thing, not when we’re actually receiving the pleasurable thing.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

The behaviors we do in rapid succession—from gambling to overeating to overbuying to binge-watching to binge drinking and so much more—are powered by a “scarcity loop.”

It has three parts.

Opportunity—> Unpredictable Rewards—> Quick Repeatability

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

We’re still compelled to eat more food than our bodies need. To impulsively search for more information. To buy more unnecessary stuff. To jockey for more influence over others. To do what we can to get another fleeting hit of pleasure. To fixate on getting what we don’t have rather than using and enjoying what we do have. We have a scarcity brain.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

A scarcity cue is a piece of information that fires on what researchers call our scarcity mindset. It leads us to believe we don’t have enough. We then instinctually fixate on attaining or doing that one thing we think will solve our problem and make us feel whole.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

The worst habits are things we can do over and over and over in rapid succession—eventually to our detriment. These behaviors are often fun and rewarding in the short term but backfire in the long run.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

Doesn’t matter how much gas we give good new habits; if we don’t resolve our bad ones, we still have our foot on the brake.

Scarcity Brain by Michael Easter

[eleven-fiftynine]

As I took a good look at my resistance to living on a budget, I had to face a tough truth—it came down to me not wanting to grow up and be accountable. One thing we’re supposed to learn as we transition into adulthood is that with freedom comes responsibility. In fact, every freedom is balanced by an equal amount of responsibility. You can’t drive a car without following the road signs. You can’t fill a pantry without having a job that pays for those groceries. You can’t be physically fit without committing to a consistent workout schedule.

Somewhere along the way, many of us have convinced ourselves that it’s okay to do whatever makes us happy in the moment without considering the impact our decisions will have on our futures. When people live like this, they upset the balance that exists between freedom and responsibility. Our unwillingness to grow up in some areas, like how we use money, will only force us to live life on someone else’s terms and not our own. Being an adult isn’t all fun and games. If you’ve been an adult for longer than twenty minutes, you know this well.

Freedom doesn’t exist outside of responsibility. If we want to live life on our own terms, then we have to acknowledge there are certain boundaries we need to determine for ourselves—and then we must live within those guidelines. If we want to take control of our money instead of having our money take control of us, then we have to learn to live within a budget.

Love Your Life Not Theirs by Rachel Cruze

[eleven-fiftynine]

Growing up, I always heard my parents say, “It’s okay to have nice stuff; just don’t let your nice stuff have you."

Love Your Life Not Theirs by Rachel Cruze