elvy

major depressive | generalized anxiety | borderline personality | anorexia nervosa | osdd | cptsd

[elvyswonderland]

gonna use this as a safe place to vent and keep like a diary or whatsoever.

Five fun facts about me:

1. My name is C, I was born in the 04s’

2. I enjoy Diet Coke, Diet Arizona and Monster Ultra

3. I’ve had some traumatic encounters in the past

4. I’m currently sober, but on some meds

5. I have a Norwegian forest kitten as my therapist

I honestly just wish I was okay. I have been out of the hospital for 18 days. Got admitted bc of a suicide attempt. Tbh, the thought of suicide still hasn’t left me. I still think about suicide the moment I wake up until I go to sleep at night. I wish I was okay.

[elvyswonderland]

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I’ll have family therapy on Friday and I still have PTSD from my dad so I will be tackling that yay🤩🤢

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Tbh I just want to die.

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Slept the whole day yesterday and just been having a lot of nightmares. Skipped a day of school but I’m back today:)

[elvyswonderland]

Oh I didn’t mention but I’ve cut off Effexor completely for 5 days now n I’m feeling great😤🤙🏻

My meds rn:

20mg Latuda (Hallucination but I cut off!!)

.25mg Lendormin (sleep)

25mg valdoxan (anti withdrawal symptoms from Effexor)

30mg Mirtazapine (antiEPS)

[elvyswonderland]

Tbh I’ve stopped posting memes Bc I’ve actually been doing more things than just hiding in my bed. I’m currently cutting off and only on 3 meds.

-75mg Effexor

-40mg Latuda

-.25mg Lendormin

Feeling great. Life has a bit up and downs but I’m trying my best. I rlly hope I could be pillless on my 18th birthday in 3 months.

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Started on 75mg of Effexor a day, been sleeping until noon and going to school this week, I think I should cut down my sleeping meds

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Proudly smashed my examssssss. Haven’t felt like this in a decade. I’m finally healing and working on my life.

[elvyswonderland]

On Monday my dad was permanently banned from my house. I finally feel like I’m moving on. I’m finally feeling relived.