Cal

I'm just a fool that's dicking around, looking at art and reading porn. 32, she/they/he/whatever works for you, I'm pretty chill as long as you don't hate on others! No terfs, racists, etc. ❤️

[linecoveredinjellyfish]

i am some sort of fey creature and my cat is the human who i have arbitrarily decided is my favorite human.

[linecoveredinjellyfish]

i live, to him, an unfathomably long life

i have access to powers and locations that he cannot access independently; he needs my help to navigate the world i've brought him to

i simply found him outside and abducted him one day

there are many cats in the world, but this one is the best and my most favorite. why? because he was available to abduct that morning and for very little other reason.

i have a much greater understanding of this world than him, but he has unshakable confidence in his ability to figure it out and i find that really cute

the power dynamic is fundamentally unbalanced, but i let him have a little audacity. a little combativeness and sass. as a treat.

some humans are needlessly cruel to cats or take them in for a short time before neglecting or abandoning them. but i have chosen to love and guard this one with my life. because i think he's neat.

he is very well-treated and has pretty much everything he could possibly want or need, but he is my prisoner.

[elektricangel]

Guess who finally finished DMC 5 (it's me)

[elektricangel]

Guess who finally finished DMC 5 (it's me)

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

Video caption: Good guy who talks like a bad guy 

“Perhaps you’d like to see my pets. They were ALL … rescues.” 

“And as always, gentlemen, our profits will be … donated.” 

“Oh, I wish I could stay and chat, but I’m afraid I have to take my friend to the airport.” 

[yourheartinyourmouth]

Redeemed villain who can’t let the speech pattern go

[zatartheperfect-blog]

Megamind.

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

Video caption: Good guy who talks like a bad guy 

“Perhaps you’d like to see my pets. They were ALL … rescues.” 

“And as always, gentlemen, our profits will be … donated.” 

“Oh, I wish I could stay and chat, but I’m afraid I have to take my friend to the airport.” 

[yourheartinyourmouth]

Redeemed villain who can’t let the speech pattern go

[zatartheperfect-blog]

Megamind.

[psyduckz]

aww his frog smile

[dogpuppy]

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

A thing about parenting is that there are a lot of behaviors that you want to encourage your future adult to have that are SO HARD TO HANDLE in children.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

He HAS whatever body autonomy I can grant but I really need to marshal some arguments about not letting other children cut his hair while he’s IN class.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

OK ok OK ok ONE like we can do whatever we want with our bodies as long as it’s safe but there’s a time and place like for example we only do flips on grass, in houses, or on gym mats. Being naked is also a behavior for specific circumstances like inside a house or swimming in the woods! Hair cutting is like flips or taking off all your clothes!

Two it creates a mess and is really itchy, so we have to plan to do it somewhere where we can clean it up easily and take a bath afterwards and Not! In! Your! Kindergarten! Art! Class!

Three other kids might see how much fun you’re having getting your hair cut and also cut their hair and then be sad about how their hair looks. I know YOU don’t mind (and apparently Malachi is some kind of genius kindergartner barber??) but they might mind how they look, you have to set an example.

Four the teachers get to set the rules for the classroom and if you break those rules then you don’t fill out your sticker chart. I’m pretty sure hair cutting — even consensual hair cutting — breaks a rule. You can check. Ask a hypothetical question. Don’t tell them you’ve been doing this for weeks, they might get upset.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

[that-house]

[veliseraptor]

have realized that while i am not a fan necessarily of "people meet and immediately fall in love" i am a fan of "people meet and are immediately obsessed with each other." the love can come later but the absolute fixation should be immediate

[reddpenn]

Some very cool mammatus clouds after a big thunderstorm!

[banchie]

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges

[wholesome-animal-images]

[a-book-of-creatures]

SPROING

[smovs]

[sirsoso]

About sums up the ending of dmc5 ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

[psyduckz]

snack time

[eldr1tch-cr0w]

number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly