EmmaWasRight

Stuff. A bit geek, always chic.

[ampervadasz]

[masterkfox]

my two brain cells

[vigilantsycamore]

This is what executive dysfunction looks like

[a-book-of-creatures]

Inside you there are two hamsters…

[finnslay]

opening tumblr in march and it's just like "huh. knife weather we're having."

[lliveonthesunn]

every other week, my mom would make a giant pot of vegetable soup. she'd pack half of it in a tupperware and take it to her best friend's house. they both had three kids whose ages aligned. they'd lock us out of the house and go through each room, finding every piece of dirty laundry and then spend the afternoon keeping the washer and dryer running, folding and putting away each load while gossiping.

every alternate week, her best friend would come to our house with a tupperware full of chicken spaghetti. they'd stick us in front of a tv with a stack of disney vhs tapes and go through each room, finding every dirty dish, and then spend the afternoon at the kitchen sink, washing each dish by hand while gossiping.

it wasn't always soup and spaghetti and laundry and dishes. but it was almost always a meal and a chore. here is a night you don't have to cook dinner. here is a chore you can cross off your list. and here is a day you don't have to spend alone. because really food and friendship and a feeling of accomplishment are what we all need most.

[pazzesco]

Moon thief

[szczekaczz]

Henriëtte Ronner-Knip, A dog and her puppies

[zvaigzdelasas]

[luunarmoonar]

Wait guys please look at Henriëtte Ronner-Knip’s other works because the things she made are fantastic

A lot of her works have fantastic titles but I think my favorite has got to be

“A Disagreement Upon a Point of Art”

[penandinkprincess]

no but i'm still thinking about how much boromir would fucking LOVE the shire

it is beautiful rolling hills just stuffed to the GILLS with hobbits

including BABY HOBBITS

HOBBITS BUT SOMEHOW IMPOSSIBLY EVEN SMALLER

and yeah the adults might be fairly wary, but we see in the first movie that the kids come running immediately to see gandalf in hopes of seeing something magic

and now??? here is LARGE PERSON??? who can play swords and toSS THEM REAL HIGH UP IN THE AIR AND CATCH THEM???

boromir deserved to retire as the grandpa of endless waves of hobbits, and i will cry forever that he never got to live his destiny

[penandinkprincess]

weeping on the floor about

the idea of a hobbit mama scolding her faunts not to get too rough with "nice mr. boromir" as this man is exactly where he wants to be being dogpiled by giggly bb hobbits who absolutely "defeated" him in "combat"

warrior hands that have seen so much violence SO gently holding a TEENY TINY baby hobbit he was handed to let a papa hobbit track down his wayward toddler

(boromir fighting back tears because THEY COME THIS SMALL??? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE???? THE BABY FITS IN ONE OF HIS HANDS???) (baby yawns and snuggles their lil cheek against his thumb and this man is nearly brought to his knees)

Official Manager Of Lifting Big Things

boromir accidentally joining a hobbit stitch and bitch club because someone's gammer asked him to carry her yarn for her to the meeting and he didn't know how to leave after he was greeted and handed food and tea

the club is actually fun, and the hobbit grannies respond to his tales of politics and battle with the same sympathetic clucking that they do to rivals stealing recipes, including his hand being patted sympathetically

boromir gets his own special big cup that moves from house to house for meetings so he can get an acceptable amount of tea for gossip time

[penandinkprincess]

there is So Much Lap for bb hobbits to claim

[penandinkprincess]

the concept of bb hobbits making him a flower crown for the spring festival so he can match everyone but having to adjust it twice because it's the first one they've made so big before

[penandinkprincess]

the idea of bb hobbits who heard stories (mostly from pippin and merry) who now yell out "GONDOR >:D" when charging into a playfight (they don't know what a gondor is) (they're not interested in learning)

(five of them are holding up boromir's shield and can't see past it) (they will charge headfirst into a tree) (they will learn nothing from this experience)

boromir having to learn how to do the cat owner shuffle because there are always faunts underfoot (usually trying to catch a lift on his feet because he can step SO high :D)

gandalf being lowkey salty because HE still gets side glances??? but boromir??? is basically seen as everyone's relative who just happens to be very large??? yes he is Big Folk, but above and beyond that, he is hobbit ✊😔

[penandinkprincess]

@milady-bugg oh my god great pyrenees boromir

[penandinkprincess]

@little---furnace

oh my god cultural misunderstanding of

in gondor: constantly at war, awareness of supply use, the polite thing to do is to ask for more if you want it but to always have finished what's on your plate when you're done.

in the shire: with hobbit appetites, a fully empty plate means a guest needs more. no one wastes a bunch (leavings will be fed to the pigs), but good manners to show you've had enough involves leaving just a bit to show you were well-satisfied and completely full. an empty plate means you need more to fill up the corners.

so boromir is trying to be done, but the hobbits just keep putting more on his plate, and it turns into a feedback loop of politeness that ends with boromir eating more than he ever has and still being stuck at this tea party two hours past when he first tried to leave.

the comedy of this poor man trying SO hard to eat fast enough that he can put his plate down and escape versus hobbit granny watching him like a hawk with serving tongs in one hand and a tray of mini quiche in another.

[grumpyjesterr]

on another note, watched The Mummy (1999) the other day and I couldn’t help  feel like the O’Connells and the Addams (Addams Family Values (1993) would get on really well ya know? The O’Connells are basically the pastel adventure version of the Addams, surely they would just be vibin’ over tea and crumpets in an extremely haunted mansion having a ball of a time

[grumpyjesterr]

Morticia: “So what is it you do for a living my dear?”

Evelyn: “We dig up dead people who often have monstrous curses placed on them!”

Morticia: “fascinating”

[grumpyjesterr]

Gomez: *leaping out from behind a pillar which is encrusted with ominous looking runes* en garde!

Rick: *grabs sword from equally ominous looking wall full of weapons one of which seems to be glowing* fantastic I was getting a bit rusty

Gomez: *nearly in tears* oh he’s screaming nonsensically, what spirit! what reslove!

[grumpyjesterr]

*Rick and Gomez, still frantically sword fighting*

Rick: Have I mentioned how wonderful my wife is yet, I really feel like I haven’t really expanded enough on how wonderful she is

Gomez: do go on, I would be delighted to hear about how wonderful your wife is, I strongly encourge all men to extoll the virtues of their wives with rapturous praise, however I should perhaps mention my wife is in fact better

*sword fighting intensifies as both men rapturously extoll the virtues of their wives*

[digitaldiscipline]

Jonathan and Fester and Cousin Itt watch from the bar, where Lurch and Thing are making the drinks.

[lemonsharks]

Jonathan and Thing knew one another from The War; each thought the other to be dead

Their reunion is highly emotional

[burntcopper]

Rick, whilst swordfighting:  My wife resurrected an ancient evil that brought about the plagues.

Gomez: What. A. Woman.

[beardedmrbean]

I’m gonna need to remember this prompt for when I’m having a bad day

[mikkeneko]

AITA for eating plastic?

I (12NM) have worked out a system with my roommate (30s, F) wherein I can let her know that I’m hungry and need more food by chewing on plastic, something she hates. Given that she does not speak Cat, this is a reliable way for me to pass along information. However, I also find chewing plastic fun and tasty on its own merits. This causes my roommate to ineffectively curse at me. AITA for eating plastic whenever the hell I feel like it, whether there’s food in my bowl or not?

[copperbadge]

AITA for allllllllmost touuuuuuuching

My (7F) dad (46M) says I need to stop antagonizing my sister (7F) by allllllllmost touching her with my paws as we recline upon a luxurious heated duvet. I maintain my sister doesn’t even notice I’m alllllllllllllmost touching her and is more interested in dad giving her cheek rubs. AITA?

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[flyingfishtailoutpost1]

At some point in your life you will think that thing you are baking or roasting needs a little more brown on top, and you will put the broiler on. This thought is not evil.

When you think “I don’t need to set the timer for two minutes I’ll remember to check it” then that is the devil speaking. The devil loves the taste of charcoal.

[plasticfangtastic]

[alexseanchai]

[Iimage: 2020 tweet by Laura LeeLun: "Why has no one written a 'Christmas' rom-com about a lonely Jewish widow and the Chinese restaurant owner who serves her every year but is too shy to reveal his feelings?"]

.

Double Happiness

A SHORT FILM BY LAURA LEELUN & SHARI ALBERT     DONATE After 40 years of patronage, a spicy New York Jewish widow and the tightly wound Chin

[thats-what-sidhe-said]

That just goes to a donate page, so I assumed it hadn't started yet, but I did some looking around and it turns out the film has been made and is being shown at festivals! I don't see anywhere to watch the full thing (someone please comment if you know) but I did find a trailer:

[qqueenofhades]

Looked it up on imdb and the poster is SO sweet:

[ragwitch]

Ragwitch Prompt Party Master List

Thank you everyone who submitted prompts, thank you so much to everyone who responded to the prompts, I am super dooper overwhelmed! I initially thought I’d do fifty prompts at 250 words because it’d be about 12,500 words and that didn’t seem so bad. I didn’t get that many but there’s over thrice that number of words in fic on this list! So that worked out nicely!! :D Enjoy <3! I’ll be in my corner crashing so send hugs and nice thoughts and fic recommendations for me while I recover.

1. Bedtime Reunion - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @bloomsoftly (E)

2. Tosca and Cheese Fries - Tasertorch (Darcy Lewis/Johnny Storm) for @anais-ninja-bitch (T)

3. Sleeping Dragons Need Espresso - Shieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers) for @wahwahwaffles (T)

With Thor additions - https://ragwitch.tumblr.com/post/170499924911/yay-prompt-im-terrible-at-prompts

4. A Waking Up Thing - Taserbite (Darcy Lewis/Natasha Romanov) for @paranoidwino (T)

5. Tea Service - Taserbite (Darcy Lewis/Natasha Romanov) for @ficsandteamakemehappy (G)

6. Wallace - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @sachertortes (G)

7. A Mandatory Vacation - Darcy Lewis/Heimdall/Sif for @belladonnaprince (T)

8. Welcome Home - Wintershieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers) for @sailorhufflepuff (E)

9. Idiots Guide to Flirting - Firedickshock (Johnny Storm/Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow) for @zephrbabe (E)

10. Secret Weapon - Sciencebabes (Darcy Lewis/Jane Foster) for @rosiedeplume (G)

11. Missing and Kissing - Shieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers) for @glynnisi (E)

12. Just Pretending - Shieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers) for @justagirlfromcharleston (E)

13. Bubble Bath for Wolverine - Clawshock (Darcy Lewis/Logan)  for @georgiagirlagain (M)

14. Winter’s Soldier - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @quadradaz (G)

15. Don’t F*ck It Up - Taserbones (Darcy Lewis/Brock Rumlow) for @ibelieveinturtles (E)

16. Introduce Yourself - Darcy Lewis/Johnny Storm/Bucky Barnes for @phoenix-173 (T)

17. Hey, Handsome - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @fanfic-bookworm (G)

18. Curse of the Boyfriend Sweater - Quicktaser (Darcy Lewis/Pietro Maximoff) for @dresupi (G)

19. Care and Feeding of Mermaids - Shieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers) for Anon (G)

20. The Dark and Lovely Woods - Wintershieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers) for @brasspistol (T)

21. Nooner on the Beach - Scott Lang/Darcy Lewis/Clint Barton for @bylillian (E)

22. Love Hacks - Ironshock (Darcy Lewis/Tony Stark) for @wheresarizona (T)

23. Snuggling for Cold - Tasertricks (Darcy Lewis/Loki) for @amidtheflowers (G)

24. Love at First Sight or Bang A Gong (Get It On) - Shieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers) for @widow-made-me-do-it (T)

25. Soapbox Derby - Tasertricks (Darcy Lewis/Loki) for @artemisgarden (G)

26. Sweet Heat - Darcy Lewis/Wanda Maximoff/Steve Rogers for @typhoidmeri (G)

27. Coffee Shop Con-Artist - Shieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers) for @refraindrops (G)

28. Inconvenient Attraction - Winterhawkshock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes/Clint Barton) for @caitriona-3 (E)

29. Goodnight Kiss - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @nefariousinkblot (M)

30. The Point of The Kitten Bowl - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @dixiedolittle (G)

31. A Little Love - Darcy Lewis/Sam Winchester for @chocolategate (E)

32.  Thrifter Grifter - Darcy Lewis/Peter Quill for @tinydear (G)

33. Trash Heap - Hawkshock (Darcy Lewis/Clint Barton) for @labelleizzy

34. Value and Hue - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @80daysofunsaidthings (G)

35. Ms. Fix-it - Wintershieldshock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers) for @ahandafootahead (G)

36. Last Chance On Ice  - Wintershock (Darcy Lewis/Bucky Barnes) for @burtnee-11 (G)

[keow]

This is probably my favorite image of all time I first saw it years ago and it has stuck in my head since then. The only vibes I’ll ever need

[treasuresfortheeyes]

This has the same cuteness overload vibes as this:

[threeminutesoflife]

baby chicks and penguins

[lastoneout]

gotta add Baby Yaga to this post it's important (x)

[aregebidan]

[ID: The photos are all of tiny, bundled-up babies in snowy landscapes. I cannot explain to you how bundled they are. They look like small adorable lumps of fur and fabric with clueless little faces. They’re so short and so round. End ID.]

[badjokesbyjeff]

[not-all-there98]

I completely missed the joke about him being the Rock, I just thought Medusa wouldn’t be able to turn him to stone because he’s too pure and good

[karakat2005]

i’m a complete and utter dumbass who got dwayne johnson and john cena mixed up so i thought the joke was that medusa can’t see him

[black-nata]

i wish the people above a good day. i love and appreciate you and your singular braincell. 

[valjean69]

Im so glad I follow sparknotes on Twitter omg

[emmawasright]

I’m making an appointment with a new therapist. Would it be weird if I told her not to worry about emailing me outside of regular business hours?

I mean, I’m working on enforcing boundaries with my work, they should have a right to do that as well. Or am I just being weird?

[homiedepot]

[homiedepot]

[sandersstudies]

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m working there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates appropriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

[sandersstudies]

Everyone saying “i love her” in the notes, do NOT worry she loves you too.

Every time a customer says “I love your energy,” or “I love your enthusiasm,” she says “I love YOUR energy! You have a fantabulous rest of your day, don’t forget to be awesome! I’ll see you later, alligator!”