bcrncold:
Carlisle hummed dubiously. There would be no convincing Edward it seemed, and if his theory was correct, it would be proved soon enough. But it wasn’t something to quibble over now - there were more important things at hand, such as trying to navigate this without it become a disaster. After all, it wasn’t as if someone had written a sire’s handbook. No, this would all be improvisation. He couldn’t fail Edward now, not after everything.
He placed a tentative hand on the boy’s shoulder. No longer was his skin hot with humanity and fever, now it was cool. Unpleasantly so, for a human, but the same as any other of their kind. “Believe me, had I the time, the opportunity, I would have. But I could not. A mother’s love… there’s no fighting it. She wanted you to have a life beyond this, don’t begrudge her that.” A part of Carlisle couldn’t help but feel envious, he had never had the chance to get to know his mother, and given his immortality he would never get the chance to. But he had made peace with that, and in time Edward would also.
“I’m familiar with that particular passage.” With his father being a clergyman, how could he not? And was it not those words that had caused him so much hurt in his newborn days? “I have lived long enough now, and if anything life has taught me that the bible is not always correct. It took a very long time to learn that, in fact. But I believe, Edward, that God has a different plan for us than he does for most. Neither is better than the other, what truly matters is the choices we make.”
He cast a glance to the window. There was still some time before sundown. There was no way he could get Edward out without causing a serious issue just yet. “You need to feed. Tell me, have you read Dracula? A lot of it is woefully incorrect, but there is one thing that Mr Stoker did get right even if he did not understand the options there can be. What does a vampire need to survive?”
... couldn’t fail Edward now. Not after everything. Again, Edward heard the doctor speak clear as day, yet this time he saw that his mouth didn’t move at all as he said it. It was possible that he’d been telling the truth before, in that case, but that would mean that he could... what, read minds? Doctor Cullen seemed to have the answers to most everything else he may have questions toward, albeit not having shared them yet, so he might know something about this as well. Edward just had to either ask him directly, or hint at it by answering his innermost thoughts. “What do you mean by ‘failing me’?"
Don’t begrudge his mother for wanting him to live without her? As much as that made sense, it was hard to want to follow it, just as it was hard to not begrudge the doctor for following a woman’s dying wishes. Surely he was lucid enough to have made this decision himself, right? The more Doctor Cullen spoke, the more it became clear to Edward the situation he was in, and the more he felt sick to his stomach (could he even be sick anymore?). A man of medicine, whose father was apparently a clergyman (though he didn’t say that out loud either), spoke as if the possibility of vampirism and immortality was completely normal and logical, and though he wanted to vehemently deny it, Edward wasn’t stupid. He could connect the dots.
“The bible is the word of God, doctor. To say it’s incorrect is as sinful as being a creature like what you’re implying is.” He exhaled shakily, trying not to think about the fact that he’d gone far longer than normal not breathing while he was thinking everything over a few moments prior, and straightened his posture. “They need blood,” he said quietly. “Doctor Cullen, you’re not only implying that you’ve made me a vampire, but that you’re a vampire as well--a rather old one--and I need to spend the rest of my immortal life killing others so I can live. Tell me, how does any of that say to you that we aren’t damned?”














