Rather than black-feathered wings or draconic bat wings, fallen angels are marked by their wings resembling cooked chicken wings and constantly emitting the odor of garlic parmesan.
NASA
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noise dept.
Color Me Curious
almost home
Cosimo Galluzzi
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blake kathryn
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
The Stonewall Inn
One Nice Bug Per Day

roma★

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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Claire Keane
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TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr

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@epiglottalaxolotl
Rather than black-feathered wings or draconic bat wings, fallen angels are marked by their wings resembling cooked chicken wings and constantly emitting the odor of garlic parmesan.
The typewronger <- new device for fucking things up real bad
Actually the real reason I transitioned was because my parents joked so many times about returning me to the child store I decided to void the warranty.
Actually the real reason I transitioned was my dad complained about women in golf so much I knew it was a sure fire way to make him stop trying to teach me golf.
Actually the real reason I transitioned was because I'm really supportive of my wife but I wanted to make shopping for their tampons feel less awkward.
Actually the real reason I transitioned was to prove to a point about the ending of the Scottish play to my 8th grade English teacher.
Actually the real reason I transitioned was because slutty shorts for men went out of style and I couldn't give them up.
Have you considered doing standup comedy?
I prefer to sit.
Well then have you considered sit down comedy?
For sure, every time I stand up for open mic night, they says to me "sit back down."
"doing" was never a verb, it was hiding its identity as a bouncing onomatopeia for years and nobody noticed
Besides the obvious like having financial security, being able to support your community and take care of friends and family, the whole "money doesn't bring happiness" bullshit is still bullshit because even if we only look at it from "buying frivolous trinkets" point of view, there's so many fun things I'd get myself commissioned just for shits and giggles.
For one, I'd get my dental layout scanned and then use the 3d model of my teeth to commission a giant pair of pincers where the cutters are replaced with a life-sized metal recreation of my teeth. I would use these to press bite marks on all sorts of things that a human being physically could not bite into, and emotionally would not want to.
For no other reason than to fuck with people. Just so they can see a very obviously human bite mark on something and wonder how the fuck did someone bite a goddamn brick wall, and why would anybody do that.
You know how sometimes you didn’t know a thing could exist, but once you realize it COULD, then you DESPERATELY WANT IT?
I am completely fascinated by this abandoned home some urban explorers came across in Belgium. It’s covered in moss, which only adds to its charm, but look at the Plexiglas sunroom.
Keep reading
Go to a furry convention dressed as an 18th century fur trapper. Longrifle, jawtraps, chains, fur hat, big coat made of sewn-together pelts of different polyester neons...
Man. You get it. :^)
we've all got that friend who's a little too ²
never thought this day would come but i’m currently having a customer service experience so bad right now that i’m defecting from the employee regiment and joining the customers in their next battle. i don’t know who i am anymore.
experience that makes me research local customer service supervisors for a global corporation and tag them in a LinkedIn post, to fall upon their mercy.
long story short i have worked for a call center in customer service before and i knew something was not working out. i've had to call about this issue 5 times in 4 weeks because it's still not resolved, and each time the conversation has ended i've asked for an email confirmation of our conversation and a ticket number so i can call back and reference it with a new representative.
well every time i've called, the new representative has been like "i'm so sorry, but there's no ticket by that number. i have no record of you ever calling about this. i'll start a ticket for you."
finally, the fifth time i nearly burst into tears of frustration and i said "i don't want you to start a ticket for me, because it will be the sixth ticket created for this same issue. every week, one of your colleagues tells me they'll create a a new ticket for me, and then nothing happens."
they said, "i'm sorry but i have no record of those tickets existing." and i was like i KNOW. but they doooooo what is happening.
finally i got transferred to a supervisor's supervisor.
if you've ever worked in online customer service, you know that when a customer calls with a problem, you create a "ticket" that puts that issue into the system. if you can't resolve it, it goes into a ticket queue, where other people with the ability to resolve it select it, put it into their personal working queue, and resolve it.
well after 30 minutes of searching, this supervisor tells me, dumbfounded, that she's discovered a completely unique queue she's never seen before, where my tickets have been going somehow. a pocket universe queue that no one has access to or can edit or select from, not even her. she has no idea what's happening. she's like "yes, here are all your tickets, and no one can open them or comment on them or resolve them.....this is crazy......" and it's JUST my tickets in there. no one else's. of tens of thousands of customers.
all professionalism fell by the wayside. i told her i've worked with those queues before and also found that totally wild. she was like "what the hell is going on...." and talked me through everything she was seeing and how gobsmacked she was. we were both like "this is one for the books truly"
tells me she's going to have to bring this up above herself because this is a really big error on like, a coding level, that she has no idea how to resolve. tells me she will personally call me back tomorrow to update me.
four days pass with no word.
i call customer service again. random agent. explain the entire situation, including that last bit.
agent says "i'm sorry but i have no record of those tickets existing. i'll have to start a ticket for you. rest assured, it will be resolved."
i said, "no it won't be. it never will be. because they're in the special queue."
clearly not believing me, they said, "i've heard nothing about that. i'll start a new ticket for you."
“Normal style” is a great phrase because it is decidedly not normal style to say.
@epiglottalaxolotl
hi clicktuck
Anyway, in my idiolect (and those of my close friends), "style" has become a productive suffix for forming adverbs, similar to the more traditional "-ly". The most common examples of this phenomenon are in the words "normalstyle", "crazystyle", and "badstyle", but other derivations are possible. I love speaking language normalstyle.
currently it is raining wetstyle
it has happened again. i apologize. have some Plance
(saw the meganium ditto and knew what i had to do)
PLANCE WEAR PANCE
i love it when plance wear pance
i learned how to noun in noun class
regi babies
legendary scrandle pull
tried to say logographic and I ended up saying logarithmic language. what are your thoughts on this new development
it kind of scares me but i accept this development. logarithmic language......
I think those fancomics where Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes is transgender are cute and fun but I also think it's a deep misunderstanding of Calvin's character to think he would transition into a heterosexual normie who goes to her high school reunion. That girl would have neopronouns and fang implants
Adult Calvin is a tattoo artist named Panthera who is the bassist in a terrible metal band called Captain Napalm and Hobbes helps do faer E injections
I know it's like 2 weeks too late to change it but I'm so mad I didn't realize that the band would obviously be called "Get Rid Of Slimy GirlS". I walk the road of shame
@madnessbrainworms pointing at you
“Normal style” is a great phrase because it is decidedly not normal style to say.
@epiglottalaxolotl
hi clicktuck
Anyway, in my idiolect (and those of my close friends), "style" has become a productive suffix for forming adverbs, similar to the more traditional "-ly". The most common examples of this phenomenon are in the words "normalstyle", "crazystyle", and "badstyle", but other derivations are possible. I love speaking language normalstyle.