“They’re always wanting to go inwards to understand themselves and their emotions better, but now I think they’ve gotten too pulled in to where it’s taking from their experience of living their life.” -Virgo friend talking about an UBP Moon we know. My Virgo friend frequently warns me of doing the same—I'm an UBP Moon.
Being an Uttarabhadrapada feels like arriving just a few seconds too late to catch a train and instead of expending energy by running to catch up, you watch it pass and walk or slow down and stay still, waiting for the next. Being a cow yoni and Saturn ruled nakshatra, our movement is slower than those around us (which is usually intentional anyways) so the sense of urgency that so many people feel naturally goes against our desire to go at a self-directed pace, internally and externally. I don't know if this has been correlated before so don't credit me, but cows are called "ruminators" because their digestive system needs to be processed multiple times before they can fully absorb what they’ve eaten. I think that fits well with how UBPs process their emotions and digests subconscious material.
Uttarabhradapadas witness life from a non-linear, somewhat “depersonalized” state. Our active participation is way more passive than those around us normally which is why we’re perceived as unreachable to others (there, yet not quite). We’re aren’t very overt people either, doesn't mean we're dispassionate or indifferent, we care very much which is exactly why we have to somewhat distance ourselves energetically. I think we also just tend to get swept up in feelings—Ours, others' feelings, your's, their's, the living, the dead, feelings from the past, feelings yet to come, etc. (never-ending feelings.)
When feelings and experiences (especially ones that brought pain) go unaddressed and becomes internalized, UBPs can act out in very volatile, corrupt ways—Our internal chaos externalizes pretty evidently. One of the biggest signs an UBP has not swam to the depths is when they do things to others in an unconscious attempt to make them feel the way others made them feel because those feelings and experiences haven’t been processed or “digested” yet—the same volatility can be self directed as well. AhirBudhnya tells us that in order to clear out a foundation that’s built on chaos, you have to swim down and then work your way back up and that the only way out of a burning basement is to go up.
Something I have been dwelling on for UBPs (and Pisces in general) is what happens when we're devoid of the ability to connect with our sense of spirituality and inner selves because of today's society? I think about how hard it is for Pisces to thrive and feel connected when living amongst people who are so seemingly adverse to nature and inner exploration—Because these limitations are unwillingly placed onto us, Pisces suffers and I believe this is a facet of Saturn's rulership over this nakshatra. We need to be able to be still at times, not only limited to Uttarabhadrapada, but definitely mandatory for us. I've seen and experienced what it does when we aren't taking time to ruminate so UBPs can ruminate a little bit as a treat (haha get it cause you digest treats), just don't abandon your reality.
