The audience is not the Deity

I'm so tired I think I'm gonna die. 21y/o, might be a man but if I am it's a secret, shameful kinnie of at least 3 different violent, problematic fictional men. Kill me before I do it myself, give me a run for my money!

[whumpshaped]

low self-esteem/depressed/suicidal whumpee starter pack

"what does it matter?"

"what's it to you?"

"i'm fine"

"why would you care?"

"sorry for being a bother"

"never mind"

"i don't matter"

"i'm better off dead"

"i'm just a burden anyway"

"i'm wasted effort"

"i'm never going to get better"

"fuck off"

"it's all meaningless"

"i'll leave"

"you must be busy"

[eva-sierra]

Hey man I love the fact that you write and create content but some of these are just a direct callout post and that hurts my feelings

[kiiraes]

gonna post my entire stickman reaction pic collection

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[kiiraes]

[wovi]

*

jennifer willoughby, the sun is still a part of me

[eva-sierra]

WHY DOES EVERYONE I KNOW HATE ME

WHY CAN'T I HAVE ONE PERSON WHO WANTS ME TO KNOW THAT I'M WORTH SOMETHING

I CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS ANYMORE

[eva-sierra]

Is being alive supposed to make you wish you were dead

[nephritebabie]

the cycle of life

[eva-sierra]

Everything hurts it hurts

I haven't felt this way in so long I thought I was better

I don't want to be that person again

[eva-sierra]

My AO3 reader app just lost my page this might be it for me

[eva-sierra]

He complains that everything he says to me gets negative reactions but all he says to me are complaints and dismissals I CAN'T

[eva-sierra]

I'll read AO3 stories where flawed people get love and care and praise and it'll make everything better and my psyche won't crack under the deadly pressure of feeling like a ghost in my own home.

[eva-sierra]

I need him back. Nobody wants me here, no matter what good I do. I only get praise when I lose my shit over being told off for little fuckups while I've done a million non-fuckups.

I FUCKING CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS AGAIN I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T

I can't get a fucking hug without being looked at like I'm an alien or a leech.

I can't I can't I can't I CAN'T DO THIS AGAIN

[junibles]

I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored I hate being ignored i hate being ignored i hate being ignored

[eva-sierra]

I took a GLP yesterday and it was the most terrifying thing I'm so scared of needless, so..

It took so long, I was hi because I literally couldn't handle it sober I was in tears, I don't remember how long it took or how I did it, just that eventually I stuck myself and injected it, and apparently some of my failed attempts weren't as failed as I thought because I have like five stick marks on the area?

And I almost threw up after because I was so scared.

It didn't even hurt I was just scared. Like I barely felt anything, all the feeling was just actual fear.

So pretty much I'm a pussy, but I still did it! And now I wait to see what happens...

[harpersue]

The middle school Winter Soldier obsession is back in full force, a girl cannot deny her roots.😔

[the-real-nikki19]

a writing competition i was going to participate in again this year has announced that they now allow AI generated content to be submitted

their reasoning being that "we couldn't ban it even if we wanted to, every writer already uses it anyway"

"Every writer"?

come on

[rose-of-pollux]

Reblog if you're a writer who doesn't use AI.

[eva-sierra]

Surviving like a dog, trying to figure out what others want me to do before they can get mad about it, only knowing that I can avoid pain if I just get it right. It's alright. We can figure that out. I'll get it done.

[eva-sierra]

If I can get through today it'll be a miracle, but Sunday, the Lord's Day, is a perfect day for a miracle, is it not?