No, Seriously.

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

Arrows. Not just a floor decoration, but sure, why not.

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

I Really Don't Need

Somebody trying to explain my job to me.  Really.  And the things I need to do, which are actually the things I've already considered and argued against.  I'm way beyond all the steps you're trying to lay out for me dude, but thanks for thinking I don't know what to do.  

Fuck this place, and pretty much everyone in it.

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

THE JOYS OF BEING SINGLE IN 2014

"so, obviously you’re aesthetically interesting, but a friend of mine was looking over my shoulder just now and claimed that – without a doubt – your profile was written by a guy; he says it’s suspicious when anyone is so verbose in their profile. he claimed that there were a million dead giveaways. I came to your defense, of course, but it kept escalating and now we’ve got a $20 bet going about whether or not you’re really a girl. so, just between you and me, am I about to lose $20?"

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

The worst part is...

I can already tell when it's going to be a fucked up day when the first person I have to deal with is an unorganized, breathy, "Uhmmm", upward-inflection in all of their statements kinda person, who doesn't even have all of their questions ready to go before the phone call.  

What's going to make me believe you're competent enough to handle giving food out to people if you're questioning what's IN THE FUCKING GUIDELINES TO DO THIS, CITING OTHER STORES AND SAYING "I'VE NEVER DONE THIS AT ANOTHER STORE" AS PROOF?  That just makes me think you're stupid.

Because you are.

Jesus christ.  Not a good morning.

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

What’s the point of being thorough when nobody else is. 

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

I want to throttle the person who popularized that skinny chalkboard font that's on every artisanal cookbook/sandwich board/website/phone app. 

[everybodyistheworst-blog]

lady...

I don't understand why you think it's okay to walk over and have a private cash register open for you and your $10 salad, when there are three express lanes open.  Also, I don't understand why my explanation of "Oh, I don't work this section, he's the booth supervisor, so he'll be able to help you when he's finished with another customer" was SOOO confusing that I got the upward inflected "Excuse me?" that just made her lululemon fleece top POP.