Cinephilia & Dysphoria

Scott

[heartint0w]

A TRANS COLLEGE STUDENT IN A TOXIC ENVIRONMENT NEEDS YOUR HELP. 

One of my close friends named Brent (pictured above, he’s the one with short black hair and glasses) is in an extremely dangerous situation. 

To give you a little background information, Brent’s a transgender individual living with two extremely conservative parents who show zero respect for Brent’s gender identity, preferred pronouns and name, and little sympathy for his overall well-being. We met this fall at Bowling Green State University, and I became one of his close friends over the year. This year has been huge in terms of him coming out as trans and developing confidence in his gender expression. He’s made so much progress and I’m incredibly proud of him, but he’s had major fallbacks in terms of his relationship with his parents. They stopped paying for his schooling for a period of time (which nearly caused him to leave school), have put him through a disgusting amount of emotional abuse because of a past sexual identity and his current gender expression. They don’t believe in gender expression or identity other than the one assigned at birth, and refuse to acknowledge that it’s something that Brent’s been dealing with throughout his entire life. They thoroughly believe being Trans* is a choice, and this is something he has been persuaded to do.  

They believe that the individuals he has befriended at Bowling Green State University have caused this change, and they don’t understand the support he’s received. They don’t believe someone who identifies as trans* can lead a successful life and that this “behavior” shouldn’t be “encouraged”. Because of this, they’re forcing Brent to transfer to another nearby University (University of Toledo) and commute every day, which would be extremely hazardous to Brent’s mental well-being.    

Brent would be completely cut off from those who support him the most, including myself, his girlfriend, and his sports team, and would be completely and utterly at the whim of his parents. His parents have tried seeking therapists to “fix” this issue, and force Brent to present in a way in which goes against his preferred gender expression. 

Understandably, this takes a huge toll on Brent’s mental health. He has already begun falling into a depression because of his current situation, and is a risk to himself in terms of self harm and suicidal thoughts. 

This is our final hope for keeping Brent at Bowling Green State University where he has an overwhelming support system, and is in a  lgbtq+ positive environment. Brent’s girlfriend and myself have set up a indiegogo fundraiser in which we are attempting to raise enough money to pay for this upcoming school year. 

Our goal is roughly $10,000, and literally any possible donation can help Brent continue his college education at the university he’s currently attending. 

If you can’t donate money, which is completely understandable, PLEASE HELP BY REBLOGGING THIS POST. The more we can spread this post around the better and it’s just as important as any donations made. 

I know this post is extremely long, but one of my best friend’s mental sanity is on the line and it’s so important to me at we at least try to raise a little money to help him. This is our last hope and I know I’ve seen tumblr do so many wonderful things. 

Here’s the link where you can donate: http://igg.me/at/brent-at-bowling-green/x/7677726

Thank you so so much, and please signal boost. 

[three--rings]

Even though, in the novel, Margot at this stage of the story really should be 6 years old— because when she first was in therapy with Dr. Lecter, she was a little girl, and she was horribly molested, and it was very, very dark—I didn’t want to tell that story, so we generalized the sadism of Mason Verger so it wasn’t a sexual sadism. It was more, this is a bad man who, like Hannibal, gets off on what people do under certain circumstances. In the novel, she’s a very masculine character, who has had years of steroid abuse and is a lesbian, and it was unclear to me in the novel whether she was either transgender or a lesbian as a result of those horrible abuses and that horrible childhood and [Beat.] that’s not how transgenderism or homosexuality works. So I didn’t want to contribute to that misconception of what it is to be transgender or a gay woman. It was important for her to have a strength to her and the idea of the reason she’s going into therapy not being because she was this victim of horrible abuse. Which she is, in a different way. She grew up with a sadist, who was incredibly cruel and will be even more cruel in the future, but I like the idea that she’s in therapy because she tried to kill him, as opposed to because she was so victimized, that she had taken an active role in her victimization and had enough, tried to turn it around, and it didn’t go well for her.

A.V. Club with Hannibal’s Bryan Fuller on rebooting season two halfway through

I love having a showrunner who thinks like this.

(via kimthreerings)

[backshelfpoet]

This is the rape joke: My best friend was four years old the first time his father came into his room at midnight and tore out his throat. He still has days when I cannot hold him because the memory of a bleeding trachea haunts his doorway. He has not been home for the holidays in many years, but – even now – hands are seen as weapons. This is the rape joke: I have been told by more than twenty people that they have been raped. To all of them, I asked where the rapist was. From none of them, I heard ‘jail.’ This is the rape joke: Once my brother told me that I was so ugly, I would be a virgin forever. Unless someone raped me. But even they wouldn’t come back for seconds. This is the rape joke: I believed him. This is the rape joke: I now look at every woman on the street and wonder if the space between her legs is a crime scene, surrounded by ripped caution tape. The statistics tell me that this is so common that I will never be in a room that does not contain a survivor. Not even if I am in that room alone. This is the rape joke: I was thirteen years old, and he was supposed to be just a friend. This is the rape joke: When his older brother came home, the boy pulled away. He wiped the tears from my face and said ‘we should do this again some time.’ This is the rape joke: When I finally told my parents, they asked what I had been wearing. This is the rape joke: I had been wearing my innocence. My trust. I had worn the love I held for humanity and expected to be treated well. I had never been taught that I would be that girl, the one who keeps a mine of secrets between her legs – that girl was the slut. I wasn’t supposed to be breakable. What had I been wearing? I wore the rape joke, then I became it.

This is the Rape Joke | d.a.s

After Lora Mathis’s poem “the Rape Joke”

(via backshelfpoet)

[muxer-rebelde-deactivated201310]

emotional abuse is when someone does something to hurt you, and when you express your feelings, that you’re upset, they turn it around to be something you did to hurt them and they force you to apologize for it, and your feelings, like always, are rendered invalid and silenced, forever damaging the ability to trust others with your feelings because they always are used against you.

[brav3andwild]

this is important because so many people don’t know this

[tarraskthefateweaver]

[everythingisvibrations]

I'm where I wanted to be. 12 years battling a mental disorder and I'm as better as I could've ever hoped to be. And now I feel just as useless, just as hopeless, just as worthless. I'll never be good enough. People will always want more from me. I feel like giving up. I'm done with this cycle. I'm done feeling shame, I'm done feeling unwanted. I want to live, I want to be alone. I don't want to die, I want to live, I am just done being hurt by others. I'm letting other people hurt me

[everythingisvibrations]

When someone says that they don't watch foreign films it makes me greatly disappointed. Yes, reading subtitles takes some getting used to, I guess, but as long as you don't have some issue like dyslexia (as some in my family do) that really gets in the way of it being possible to watch a film with subtitles, I don't really except it as an excuse. Perhaps because I just don't understand people who don't try new things, and not just that, but force themselves to like them as well. As a kid it was never an option to not eat your vegetables, and as a result I was a ten-year-old who would beg mom to make brussel sprouts. Today, I have the same mindset. Even if I dislike something, I will continue eating it, again and again until I can appreciate it the way others have. It's led me to listen to music I never would have and enjoy foods that once made me gag (though the food I still can't seem to like is celery, but I'm working on it). Life is too short, and I feel that I am not living if I have to special order my meal to like it. Outrage is a film that makes my philosophy pay off. I thoroughly enjoy Japanese cinema for numerous reasons. So many popular Japanese films are constructed in complete opposition to what American filmgoers expect. Outrage lingers briefly on moments that lend nothing more than aesthetics, and then skips elaborate exposition, feeding the viewer the most minimal amount that it can to give any understanding of what's going on. Outrage is full of betrayals and power plays, but dialogue is sparse. Sometimes it's well after a character dies that it finally clicks who ordered the kill and why. However, you do figure it out. And as a wannabe screenwriter Japanese films like this make me intensely scrutinize every word I write wondering if I am wasting precious seconds of film. So many films waste time with dialogue and moments that supposedly are required to develop characters and inform the audience, but a film like Outrage makes you question the necessity of so many lines of dialogue and scenes that do little more than transition the audience from one important event to another. Outrage focuses on the moments of importance in the story, sequences of brutality and murder that illustrate the fragility of loyalty and the underlying tension that exists in the Yakuza. These scenes display another notable feature of Asian cinema--graphic violence. There were several scenes in the film where I couldn't help but choke out "holy shit" in pain from what I was witnessing. And yet, unlike most films that use gratuitous violence, none of these moments feel unnecessary--in fact, they feel absolutely essential to communicate just why the Yakuza wield the power they do over civilians, law enforcement, and rival gangs. The violence used helps explain how unpredictable and ferocious these men are, stripping away the safety of a civilized world and intimidating whoever they choose with animalistic tactics. Kitano highlights a particularly violent gesture--the cutting off of fingers as an apology--as well as ceremonial pacts between completely unceremonious (but visually beautiful) executions and beatings. Another reason why we don't require excessive dialogue in this film is because the performances are so well done. There aren't any moments of overacting, these characters are played in extremely understated ways--befitting the film they dwell in--so that the twitches in someone's face is enough to effectively show us the anxiety building within a character. There are even scenes a of intense shouting where an actor's mouth remains relatively closed, their face mostly unwrinkled--the delivery a perfect illustration of the film itself, violence and chaos contained and displayed neatly. If you've seen one Yakuza picture in the past ten years it was probably Infernal Affairs, the basis for the academy award-winning Departed. Well, Outrage is Infernal Affairs on crack, and I say that with the utmost respect for both films. This is the first film in what will soon become the Outrage trilogy--where Takeshi writes, directs, acts, and tries to give us something as memorable as Clint Eastwood has given us many times while wearing those three hats--so if you enjoyed as much as I do, go pick up Outrage Beyond afterwards to see its more than worthy (and possibly better) follow up, and hope that Takeshi Kitano can manage to keep it up on the all-too elusive 3rd film.

[everythingisvibrations]

I enjoyed 13 Assassins. Unfortunately I don't have much more to say about it. I'm failing to see why this film was made. It was entertaining, and I suppose that can be justification enough, but it is so blatantly derivative that I'm not sure why Miike didn't just remake Seven Samurai the way he did Harakiri. Instead, he gives us a very similar story--sure the villain is different, and there are 13 underdogs fighting him instead of 7--but there is little else that feels unique to this film. None of the characters are as carefully developed as the ones in Seven Samurai, a film with a significantly more deliberate pace. One might expect that Miike will deliver an entertaining and hyper-violent climactic fight, but he does anything but. The traps are a bit more over the top and there's a bit more destruction, but the battle isn't altogether that memorable. It just feels like one long scene of chaotic fighting as both sides are whittled down, with every death of one of the 13 resulting in you asking: who was that guy again? Quite unlike Kurosawa's climactic struggle in Seven Samurai, which intercut the action with moments of thoughtful strategy which kept us well aware of how the battle was going, keeping the audience anxious and interested and making the victory that much more meaningful as a result. With characters that are underdeveloped mimics of Kurosawa's memorable and endearing samurai, and battle scenes that are good but have been done better, all that's left that I can commend is the Villain. Lord Naritsugu is truly evil, and the inspiration for his sociopathy are well defined and visually illustrated--with brutal (but not Audition-level brutal) violence and occasionally subtle imagery--as well as being a clear criticism of samurai traditions, the flaws of which Kurosawa was prone to often gloss over a bit in his films. This is the only reason I can find as to why Miike bothered to remake this film, other than the fact that getting rights to remake Seven Samurai would have probably been significantly more costly. While 13 Assassins functions decently as a criticism of bushido, it isn't nearly as well constructed as Miike's other remake, Harakiri. Still, 13 Assassins is fun, and significantly more fun if you haven't seen the original film and Seven Samurai, in fact, the movie will probably seem amazing if you haven't. I feel that I'm being a little unfair, because this film existing in a void is thoroughly enjoyable, however it is in a genre that is filled with countless similar stories, and 13 Assassins doesn't succeed in doing much different or even better than those films. However, if you're not as bitchy as I am (which, good for you, you get to be entertained by things that I complain during and wish I could just sit back and enjoy) 13 Assassins will be a--dare I say?--fun and solid movie to watch, and it's available for streaming on Netflix. Also, I guess I shouldn't be too hard on Miike, the guy makes more good films in a year than some filmmakers make in their career--seriously, take a look at his filmography, I don't know how he does it, and while you're looking at his Wikipedia page, open another tab for Amazon and buy some of them, the more that happens the better the likelihood of getting his films in theaters stateside.

[themusicbuffet]

Visit Original Link

I Follow Rivers - Lykke Li

[everythingisvibrations]

I forgot about this woman. I shouldn't have. I've clearly been missing out

[everythingisvibrations]

If you want to know how to open a film, look to The Prestige. In fact, you really can look to almost any Christopher Nolan film, but the Prestige’s opening is the one that still gives me chills every time I watch it. I will frequently put in the disc just to play those first few minutes. It takes its place among introductions as perfect as the initial descent to Rapture in Bioshock. The Prestige provides exposition while setting up the trick, much like a good illusionist, and the rest of the film from that point forward is devoted to understanding the trick that we’ve seen in those first minutes, much like the mindfuckery in Nolan’s first hit—Memento.

Nolan shows with The Prestige that he understands how to perform a trick, quite unlike the absurd and CGI-filled The Illusionist, or more recently, Now You See Me, both films which are devoid of consistent internal logic, unaware that performing a magic trick onstage is quite different than performing one in a film.

"I’m sure beneath its bells and whistles it’s got a simple and disappointing trick."

"The most disappointing of all, sir. It has no trick. It’s real."

Michael Caine explains the real trick of The Prestige with those words. The film impresses not because of CGI or a clever hook, it’s greatest trick is that it is logically told. It may be dressed up in more modern storytelling conventions and a big budget, but The Prestige adheres to the models of storytelling that have always been around. It has a strong skeleton, one that holds up under scrutiny instead of collapsing when you think about the supposed cleverness like many “original” films in the past decade. It also has a soul, characters that are real, flawed, and difficult to like, instead of stale and false archetypes.

"Just a rubber ball, yes?"

The first time Borden performs the transported man is one of those scenes that give you goosebumps. It’s the perfect microcosm of what makes The Prestige great. As pointed out by Hugh Jackman’s character, Borden is a terrible showman—his trick is brilliant, but his presentation is so simple that the audience doesn’t realize how incredible it is. The scene of Borden performing is a dramatic setup, going back and forth between Angier describing it, and the trick being performed. The editing and music (and lack of music, like the silence when the trick is finally performed) provides the flourishes that Borden didn’t have, so that those watching the film experience what Borden’s audience did not—we get to experience it as the greatest trick that Angier is convinced it is.

"Are you watching closely?"

This sequence by itself sums up the other layers to the film which are interested in discussing the magic and tricks of storytelling. These tricks are becoming what Christopher Nolan is known for, now with Memento, The Prestige, and Inception under his belt. However, Nolan still knows how to tell a great straight story, as shown with his Batman trilogy. It is these strengths that make his films better than their gimmicks, and is something that many filmmakers can learn from. The Prestige has some amazing portrayals of the follies of the male ego (another specialty of Nolan’s, it would be nice to see him step out of this comfort zone and tell a woman’s story sometime) and the obsession of the central characters could’ve made The Prestige a good movie even without the narrative tricks, but the narrative tricks elevate it to the status of a GREAT movie. The twists and tricks even entertain those who have read the book, as fundamental elements have been changed, making a familiar trick to that audience new and exciting—much like Cutter’s revised birdcage trick.

The Prestige is just another revenge story, except it isn’t—or at least it tricks you into thinking it’s something more. Instead of coming up with some idea that they think will make them the next Charlie Kaufman, screenwriters should be more interested in the art of storytelling, taking a normal rubber ball and making it not normal, making it magic.

[fydogs]

[neither]

dogtor

[fuckyeahidiotonfacebook]

50 shades of bible.

[idiotsonfb]

my new favorite bible quote.

[everythingisvibrations]

Sure, Miyazaki and Studio Ghibli may be the Disney of anime, but when it comes to quality animation, Akira has no rivals. There are some cool tricks used to make lights and even holograms in the film, but there is nothing gimmicky or lazy about anything when it comes to the animation in Akira. Its hard to love the use of CGI in Steamboy, even though it was done well, because Akira proved that Katsuhiro Otomo didn’t need CGI. Akira has aged well, in fact it looks even better now than ever when you compare the hard work of hand-drawn everything to the frequently overly-stylized and sloppy work that has become much more commonplace in both anime series and films. While Miyazaki films had a reliance on painted backgrounds and modern anime often has just as incongruous looking CGI, Akira is solid, the settings and characters the result of beautiful and time-consuming drawing.

I don’t need to say much about the film. It’s brilliant. Otomo took thousands of pages of his manga and condensed it into a two-hour film that is bursting at the seams—in a good way. As should be the case with a film, not a second is wasted. the story goes back and forth between characters while cataclysmic political events are taking place in Neo Tokyo, but the complexity of the story is somehow conveyed in a way that isn’t confusing—in fact, it even feels simple.

There are few movies I can re-watch as often as Akira and still be excited by every scene. Every time I watch Akira, I’m not only entertained, but I feel like I’m still learning something new and important about how to tell a story.

I’m excited to get to see Short Peace, but I’m getting tired of waiting for Otomo to write and direct another feature-length film instead of just shorts.

[nequiquam-blog]

“How odd I can have all this inside me and to you it’s just words.”

David Foster Wallace’s, The Pale King   (via indiahrosej)

[dhauwjwncjsiwnxn]

i don’t even understand how boy bands from the late 90’s dance so well

[communistweed]

yeah they’re always so nsync

[dhauwjwncjsiwnxn]

YOU FUCKING DIDNT

[ellenripleysbelieveitornot]

Alright, calm down, if you’re going to fight, take it to the back street, boys.

[everythingisvibrations]

Just chill out everybody, don't want your temperature above 98 Degrees.

[everythingisvibrations]

“Swearing is unattractive” I’m not attractive anyway so fuck off

[southseablues-deactivated201408]

Visit Original Link

Wilco At Least That’s What You Said

[everythingisvibrations]

One of my favorite relationship songs. Just fucking gorgeous and honest. Reminds me of a few Pink Floyd songs, which is really just about the only other band that can go on with crazy guitar for minutes and me enjoy it instead of wanting to skip.

[compassionats]

Visit Original Link

Wilco - Wishful Thinking

[everythingisvibrations]

Wilco did the unbelievable thing of actually following up Yankee Hotel Foxtrot with an album just as good, but what the hell happened to them after A Ghost is Born? They got too lazy and too happy.